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Woodstock Nation responds
Oregonian ^ | 9/19/01 | DAVID REINHARD

Posted on 09/19/2001 8:14:19 AM PDT by SAMWolf

Good evening. I come to you tonight with a heavy heart, as the president of Woodstock Nation.

Today, Sept. 11, 2001, is a day that will live in inappropriateness.

The forces of religious fanaticism and misogynistic patriarchy attacked Woodstock Nation today, hijacking four jets and hitting the World Trade Center towers and Pentagon.

These acts of mass life deprivation can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of Woodstock Nation. Terrorist attacks shatter steel, but they cannot unweave the macrame of Woodstock Nation resolve.

We must act, but not in the eye-for-an-eye, tooth-for-a-tooth, tit-for-tat, retaliatory way that so many of our saber-rattling countrymyn and womyn are calling for today. We must act, but not militarily. We must act, but not with violence.

Let me say this as forcefully as I can, and let me speak directly to the terrorists and the nations that harbor them:

I'm not comfortable with all this war talk. It upsets me.

At a time like this, my friends, we must ask the tough question. Where have all the flowers gone?

So let the word go forth from this time and place:
Woodstock Nation will turn the other cheek.

All the better to hear from the people who launched these strikes, for hear them we must.

We must listen to the very real concerns of the perpetrators.

We must work to understand what prompts our brothers and sisters to slaughter thousands of innocents.

We must eliminate the root causes of terrorism, the poverty and despair.

We know the United States has done many awful things to merit the terrorists' hate and prompt their mass terror -- not developing alternative energy sources, for example. We must let the terrorists know we understand.

They were just sharing.

Understanding why this has happened, the attackers' motivations and what responsibility the United States has for its actions around the world does no dishonor to the people who died at the Pentagon, the World Trade Center and in Pennsylvania.

As such, I am dispatching battalions of diplomats to the nations that offer a safe haven to terrorists. They'll ask the nations harboring those terrorists to stop enabling. They'll ask the terrorists what's bothering them and how they're feeling about themselves. They'll also ask the terrorists to please stop. Pretty please. This is not OK.

Maybe if I get really, really upset I'll ask Interpol to drop by Osama bin Laden's tent and ask him to come in for questioning and a group hug, provided they read him his Miranda rights.

I'm also calling up the rapid deployment conflict resolution specialists and the Delta Team facilitators in our peace institutes.

They more than anyone know that violence begets violence.

They more than anyone know that a war against terrorism is fruitless.

They more than anyone know you'll just create more terrorists.

They more than anyone know that if you kill or jail bin Laden, countless other bin Ladens will take his place.

They know, too, that waging peace will require an global effort. As such, I'm calling today for an international conference on terrorism under the auspices of the United Nations.

As Winston Churchill once might have said, "We will engage them in meaningful dialogue, we will feel their pain, we will keep communicating."

Have we forgotten the words of John F. Kennedy: "We are engaged in a long twilight processing."

Have we not learned that there are no winners in war, World War II notwithstanding?

Have we not learned that arms are for hugging?

I think I speak for all the American peace community when I say how moved we've all been by the spontaneous renditions of "Down By The Riverside" and "Kumbaya" today. Across our land the dove-of-peace banners and one-world flags fly proudly again. Far out. Woodstock Nation is back.

As John Lennon once reminded us, , all we are saying is give peace a chance.

Sing it with me now.

Good night, Woodstock nation.

And, yes, Peace.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial
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I am outraged that there are so many people who buy into Mr. Reinhard's vision of the "Woodstock Nation", but I am also encouraged by the Patriotism being shown by the larger majaority.
1 posted on 09/19/2001 8:14:19 AM PDT by SAMWolf
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2 posted on 09/19/2001 8:20:04 AM PDT by 2ndMostConservativeBrdMember
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To: SAMWolf
Where's the BARF alert? These Nancy-boys really are repulsive.
3 posted on 09/19/2001 8:22:05 AM PDT by MistrX
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To: SAMWolf
Translation: It didn't affect us so we don't care.
4 posted on 09/19/2001 8:23:41 AM PDT by AppyPappy
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Um, this is pure satire.
5 posted on 09/19/2001 8:26:11 AM PDT by Diddle E. Squat
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To: SAMWolf
This guy was brave to publish this in the Oregonian....really brave.....(IT's satire, and it works, subtly, so subtly I'm not sure a lot of those Oregonians will get it...)
6 posted on 09/19/2001 8:29:01 AM PDT by goodnesswins
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To: SAMWolf
This has got to be a satire. "Where have all the flowers gone?" The guy is making fun of this crowd--either that, or Oregon is dippier than I ever could have imagined. "Imagine...." Get it?
7 posted on 09/19/2001 8:29:30 AM PDT by duvausa
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To: SAMWolf
Sounds like liberal Democrats to me.
8 posted on 09/19/2001 8:32:54 AM PDT by the_rightside
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To: SAMWolf
Truly amazing article. I don't know whether to laugh or cry!

One spot of hope, the Woodstock nation is getting old and tired, and us Punk Rock adherents are coming into our own now. You won't see us spouting off about "peace and love". Remember, we used to bash each other about FOR ENTERTAINMENT! Hell, we voted for Reagan just to extend a big middle finger to the peaceniks, and that was when we were young and stupid!

You won't see us going to peace rallies. We'll be the ones listening to "Rock the Casbah" by the Clash, with the "Nuke Afghanistan" bumper sticker on our cars! So don't give up hope yet.

9 posted on 09/19/2001 8:33:21 AM PDT by Billy_bob_bob
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To: SAMWolf
This is a hoot, thanks.
10 posted on 09/19/2001 8:36:29 AM PDT by hellinahandcart
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To: SAMWolf
This has got to be tongue in cheek.
11 posted on 09/19/2001 8:36:41 AM PDT by riley1992
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To: All
Reunhard is a Conservative. This is purely satire to point out the complete idiocy of the "peace activists". I'm sorry I didn't make this point to non-Oregonians.
12 posted on 09/19/2001 8:38:38 AM PDT by SAMWolf
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To: SAMWolf
Reunhard = Reinhard
13 posted on 09/19/2001 8:39:14 AM PDT by SAMWolf
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To: SAMWolf
You mean to tell me that this isn't a facetious letter? This is real?

These people need to grow some b*&&s, and move to Switzerland.

14 posted on 09/19/2001 8:39:23 AM PDT by Fedupwithit
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To: SAMWolf
Perhaps you should ask the Sidebar Moderator to add the words "(Big Fat Satire)" to the title? I got it by the time I read "day that will live in inappropriateness", but "where have all the flowers gone" should have been a dead giveaway. :D
15 posted on 09/19/2001 8:45:09 AM PDT by hellinahandcart
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To: SAMWolf
This is a joke. I'm surprised so many here are taking it seriously. Shades of Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal!!"
16 posted on 09/19/2001 8:45:31 AM PDT by Cincinatus
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To: MistrX AppyPappy
Did you not get that this was pure lampoon?
17 posted on 09/19/2001 8:46:58 AM PDT by Illbay
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To: SAMWolf
Woodstock Nation will turn the other cheek

And that dosn't mean part of the face.

Woodstock needs to reasses the cost of freedom. Freedom means nothing if it won't be defended.

18 posted on 09/19/2001 8:47:45 AM PDT by oyez
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To: SAMWolf
This sounds like the Jean Luc Picard version of diplomacy.
19 posted on 09/19/2001 8:48:42 AM PDT by Brett66
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To: Illbay
Did you not get that this was pure lampoon? Yes, but I've read some opinons that are just as bad.
20 posted on 09/19/2001 8:49:56 AM PDT by oyez
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