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DUmmie FUnnies 10-08-08 (Slate Writer Reveals Liberal Agenda In The Open)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | October 8, 2008 | Timothy Noah and PJ-Comix

Posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:03 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Freudenschade, baby! This is a special edition of the DUmmie FUnnies. Instead of DUmmies or KOmmies or HUffies, we are focusing on Slate senior writer, Timothy Noah, who is so confident of Obama's "victory" in November that he jumped the gun and posted the not so hidden liberal agenda out in the open. You can read his Slate ARTICLE titled, "The New Complacency," as well as an ANALYSIS of that article over at NewsBusters. So let us now join honorary DUmmie Timothy Noah in mid-gloat as he is about to reveal WAY too much in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thanking Noah's bark, is in the [barackets]:

There's a new scent in the air. If you're a Democrat, you haven't felt it tickle your nostrils since October 1996, when everybody knew that Bill Clinton was about to beat Bob Dole. The perfume hasn't been this strong since October 1964, the eve of Lyndon Johnson's landside presidential victory. It's the sweet smell of success that you can take for granted.

[If a liberal farts by himself and there is on one else around to smell it, will it count as a scent?]

With every passing day, it's harder to imagine that the next president of the United States will be a Republican—even a "maverick" Republican like John McCain. A consensus is emerging that the next president will be Barack Obama, a Democrat. Obama may not win in a landside, as some predict, but the common wisdom is that he will win and that the Democrats will expand their majorities in the House and Senate. Like the houseguests in Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None, swing states are disappearing one by one. Goodbye, Michigan; farewell, Ohio. Will Florida evaporate next? Colorado? Missouri?

[Yes, yes! Count those chickens before they hatch!]

Conservatives can carp all they want about the insularity of the cultural elite, but it's been a very long time since liberals had the chance to experience electoral complacency at the national level. You'll forgive them if they take a moment to taste it, savor it, perhaps bottle a little extra to tide them over during the next conservative ascendancy. Practically the only thing you can't do is securitize it, but it would be churlish to complain about that, given the central role the financial markets' collapse played in bringing the New Complacency about. Democrats, you want to worry about something? Worry about your portfolio!

[Taste it. Savor that Freudenschade victory champagne. It's been a long wait.]

During the past 25 years, there have been countless sentiments that respectable Democratic politicians were never, ever supposed to say out loud for fear of angering the all-powerful Republicans. It still isn't wise for Obama to say them, but maybe the New Complacency will loosen other tongues within the political mainstream. Even if it doesn't, it's fun to think about what those utterances might be. What follows is a list, compiled with help from my fellow Slate staffers. The views expressed don't necessarily reflect those of the contributors—one of whom is a conservative Republican—or even me. But they sure are a refreshing change from what we've been hearing since 1981. With a little luck, they may soon be orthodoxies.

[DUmmie Noah is so confident of victory in November that he lets down his guard and stupidly posts the liberal agenda out in the open. Now comes the really FUn part!!!]

I think Karl Marx had some valuable insights into capitalist economies!

[With a little luck you hope that Karl Marxism becomes our economic orthodoxy.]

I think abortion should be safe and legal. Rare is fine, too, but the way to achieve that is contraception, baby!

I think Mormons are kooks!

The Second Amendment does too allow government to ban handguns!

[Keep that latter one in mind, you Pennsylvania voters.]

Let's standardize the federal age of consent at 16!

Promiscuity between consenting adults is good exercise!

I don't support the troops. I support some troops, depending on whether or not they've committed war crimes!

[And there will be war crimes trials under an Obama administration.]

The military-industrial complex is a greater menace than most foreign nations!

If Israel isn't out of the occupied territories in six months, we'll cut off all aid.

[Be sure to forward that one to Susan Silverman of the Great Schlep.]

America isn't the greatest nation in the world. We think it is only because it's our country. Duh!

[May we now question your patriotism?]

America's official languages should be English and Spanish!

[Kiss goodbye to some more states and deduct them from the Obama column.]

What's so great about the Judeo-Christian tradition?

Big-city values are better than small-town values!

I'm glad the Muslims whupped the Christians during the Crusades! Served 'em right!

[Which explains why the liberals are rooting for the Islamo-Fascists now.]

I'm not a "progressive," for Pete's sake. I'm a liberal!

I'm not a "liberal," for Pete's sake. I'm a leftist!

I'm not a "leftist," for Pete's sake. I'm a democratic socialist!

I'm not a democratic socialist, for Pete's sake. I'm a Communist! Just kidding!

[You might be just kidding but the DUmmies in DUmmieland are not. Okay, folks, please e-mail this edition of the DUmmie FUnnies around so a lot more people out there can find out what the liberals are planning if Obama wins. And thanx to Slate writer, Timothy Noah, for prematurely releasing the not so hidden liberal agenda. By doing so, you might have pulled the rug from under an Obama victory which you are already celebrating.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2008; 2ndamendment; ageofconsentlaws; antiamericanism; bang; banglist; barackobama; blameamericafirst; democrats; dummiefunnies; elections; gungrabber; marxist; nobama08; secondamendment; sexualizingchildren; starkravingsocialism; timothynoah; usefulidiot
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You're just $10 away from seeing the Joe Biden video. An alternate source of the raw Joe Biden video has been found but it is expensive. However, I know someone upstairs will probably purchase it since it will have a big effect on this election. Just to keep the faith with those of you who might be casting doubt on the very existence of this video, here is a brief CLIP of the July 23, 1986 ABC News broadcast. You can see Biden at about the 1:25 mark but his rant only lasts about 30 seconds due to selective editing. However, I assure you that the raw video footage shows Biden ranting solo for much, much longer and his mannerisms are much, much more damaging. Right now seeing if the RAW FOOTAGE can be made public. The networks could easily make this public but do you think they will? Of course, if they had such a video featuring Sarah Palin they would have broadcast it within days of her being named Obama's running mate.

The raw footage of Joe Biden will definitely have an effect on this election IF it is made public since most rational people would fear Biden being just a heartbeat away from the Oval Office after watching the video.

1 posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:05 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix

In before the ping!!


2 posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:35 AM PDT by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: PJ-Comix

IB4TP


3 posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:40 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Who is the real Barack Obama?)
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To: PJ-Comix

IB4TP again baby!


4 posted on 10/08/2008 10:22:56 AM PDT by EarthBound (Ex Deo,gratia. Ex astris,scientia (What I'm really voting for is Palin in 2012!))
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To: PJ-Comix

top 10!


5 posted on 10/08/2008 10:23:09 AM PDT by txroadkill (Do it for Sarah!)
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To: PJ-Comix
You're just $10 away from seeing the Joe Biden video.

$10? Sounds fair to me.

6 posted on 10/08/2008 10:23:31 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Who is the real Barack Obama?)
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To: txroadkill

even better - you’re IB4TP! Welcome to this most exclusive of clubs!


7 posted on 10/08/2008 10:23:43 AM PDT by EarthBound (Ex Deo,gratia. Ex astris,scientia (What I'm really voting for is Palin in 2012!))
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To: PJ-Comix
0bama’s campaign in a nutshell pity he will not express it on the campaign trail.
8 posted on 10/08/2008 10:24:15 AM PDT by CzarNicky (The problem with bad ideas is that they seemed like good ideas at the time.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10??


9 posted on 10/08/2008 10:25:14 AM PDT by Dooderbutt (Al Gore - now the most sanctimonious lardbutt Yank on the planet ~ D. Thompson)
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To: Dooderbutt

Wow and IB4TP too!!!! Woo hoo!


10 posted on 10/08/2008 10:25:36 AM PDT by Dooderbutt (Al Gore - now the most sanctimonious lardbutt Yank on the planet ~ D. Thompson)
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To: PJ-Comix
"Let's standardize the federal age of consent at 16!"

Will Pitt would breathe a sigh of relief.

11 posted on 10/08/2008 10:29:26 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel
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To: PJ-Comix

“The perfume hasn’t been this strong since October 1964, the eve of Lyndon Johnson’s landside presidential victory. It’s the sweet smell of success that you can take for granted.”

Hey Hey LBJ, How many babies did you kill today?

Yeah, they loved him after another 4 years, right?


12 posted on 10/08/2008 10:30:22 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...
PING!

Be sure to check out this VIDEO of Joe Biden in this July 23, 1986 ABC News Broadcast. Biden appears at about the 1:25 mark and is on for only about 30 seconds. However, this newscast edited out the incredible long (and insane) rant by Biden. I saw a summary of the raw footage and his rant might last as long as 10 minutes. I do know it lasted quite a while and shows Biden to be quite unstable in the extreme. Hopefully the raw footage can be revealed to the public.

13 posted on 10/08/2008 10:31:43 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: The_Victor
You'll forgive them if they take a moment to taste it, savor it, perhaps bottle a little extra to tide them over during the next conservative ascendancy.

I'm awaiting a conservative ascendency too. And I won't see it even if Obama loses. Where do they get this tripe?

Bush's low approval rating is because conservative don't believe he was conservative ENOUGH!

14 posted on 10/08/2008 10:32:21 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel

TTBP and (a personal first) IB4TP.

PJ must be distracted by a phone call from Gov Vilsac?


15 posted on 10/08/2008 10:32:55 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel
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To: PJ-Comix
America isn't the greatest nation in the world. We think it is only because it's our country. Duh!

Show me which ones are better. put up or shut up.

16 posted on 10/08/2008 10:34:06 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix

Finally! A liberal states what they realy believe.


17 posted on 10/08/2008 10:35:37 AM PDT by Brett66 (Where government advances, and it advances relentlessly , freedom is imperiled -Janice Rogers Brown)
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To: PJ-Comix
America's official languages should be English and Spanish!

Well which is it? English or Spanish? Why not just go whole hog and demand that The USA become the UEsA?

18 posted on 10/08/2008 10:36:48 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix
I'm glad the Muslims whupped the Christians during the Crusades! Served 'em right

Another liberal advocating the murder, rape, and enslavement of Christians. He must have loved all the chapters of history on this when he went to school.

19 posted on 10/08/2008 10:38:03 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix
If a liberal farts by himself and there is on one else around to smell it, will it count as a scent?

I'm sure to a liberal, it will smell like potpourri.

20 posted on 10/08/2008 10:38:19 AM PDT by GOP_Raider (If I wanted a Chicago politician as my President, I'd vote for Richard Daley)
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