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DUmmie FUnnies 10-08-08 (Slate Writer Reveals Liberal Agenda In The Open)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | October 8, 2008 | Timothy Noah and PJ-Comix

Posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:03 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Freudenschade, baby! This is a special edition of the DUmmie FUnnies. Instead of DUmmies or KOmmies or HUffies, we are focusing on Slate senior writer, Timothy Noah, who is so confident of Obama's "victory" in November that he jumped the gun and posted the not so hidden liberal agenda out in the open. You can read his Slate ARTICLE titled, "The New Complacency," as well as an ANALYSIS of that article over at NewsBusters. So let us now join honorary DUmmie Timothy Noah in mid-gloat as he is about to reveal WAY too much in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thanking Noah's bark, is in the [barackets]:

There's a new scent in the air. If you're a Democrat, you haven't felt it tickle your nostrils since October 1996, when everybody knew that Bill Clinton was about to beat Bob Dole. The perfume hasn't been this strong since October 1964, the eve of Lyndon Johnson's landside presidential victory. It's the sweet smell of success that you can take for granted.

[If a liberal farts by himself and there is on one else around to smell it, will it count as a scent?]

With every passing day, it's harder to imagine that the next president of the United States will be a Republican—even a "maverick" Republican like John McCain. A consensus is emerging that the next president will be Barack Obama, a Democrat. Obama may not win in a landside, as some predict, but the common wisdom is that he will win and that the Democrats will expand their majorities in the House and Senate. Like the houseguests in Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None, swing states are disappearing one by one. Goodbye, Michigan; farewell, Ohio. Will Florida evaporate next? Colorado? Missouri?

[Yes, yes! Count those chickens before they hatch!]

Conservatives can carp all they want about the insularity of the cultural elite, but it's been a very long time since liberals had the chance to experience electoral complacency at the national level. You'll forgive them if they take a moment to taste it, savor it, perhaps bottle a little extra to tide them over during the next conservative ascendancy. Practically the only thing you can't do is securitize it, but it would be churlish to complain about that, given the central role the financial markets' collapse played in bringing the New Complacency about. Democrats, you want to worry about something? Worry about your portfolio!

[Taste it. Savor that Freudenschade victory champagne. It's been a long wait.]

During the past 25 years, there have been countless sentiments that respectable Democratic politicians were never, ever supposed to say out loud for fear of angering the all-powerful Republicans. It still isn't wise for Obama to say them, but maybe the New Complacency will loosen other tongues within the political mainstream. Even if it doesn't, it's fun to think about what those utterances might be. What follows is a list, compiled with help from my fellow Slate staffers. The views expressed don't necessarily reflect those of the contributors—one of whom is a conservative Republican—or even me. But they sure are a refreshing change from what we've been hearing since 1981. With a little luck, they may soon be orthodoxies.

[DUmmie Noah is so confident of victory in November that he lets down his guard and stupidly posts the liberal agenda out in the open. Now comes the really FUn part!!!]

I think Karl Marx had some valuable insights into capitalist economies!

[With a little luck you hope that Karl Marxism becomes our economic orthodoxy.]

I think abortion should be safe and legal. Rare is fine, too, but the way to achieve that is contraception, baby!

I think Mormons are kooks!

The Second Amendment does too allow government to ban handguns!

[Keep that latter one in mind, you Pennsylvania voters.]

Let's standardize the federal age of consent at 16!

Promiscuity between consenting adults is good exercise!

I don't support the troops. I support some troops, depending on whether or not they've committed war crimes!

[And there will be war crimes trials under an Obama administration.]

The military-industrial complex is a greater menace than most foreign nations!

If Israel isn't out of the occupied territories in six months, we'll cut off all aid.

[Be sure to forward that one to Susan Silverman of the Great Schlep.]

America isn't the greatest nation in the world. We think it is only because it's our country. Duh!

[May we now question your patriotism?]

America's official languages should be English and Spanish!

[Kiss goodbye to some more states and deduct them from the Obama column.]

What's so great about the Judeo-Christian tradition?

Big-city values are better than small-town values!

I'm glad the Muslims whupped the Christians during the Crusades! Served 'em right!

[Which explains why the liberals are rooting for the Islamo-Fascists now.]

I'm not a "progressive," for Pete's sake. I'm a liberal!

I'm not a "liberal," for Pete's sake. I'm a leftist!

I'm not a "leftist," for Pete's sake. I'm a democratic socialist!

I'm not a democratic socialist, for Pete's sake. I'm a Communist! Just kidding!

[You might be just kidding but the DUmmies in DUmmieland are not. Okay, folks, please e-mail this edition of the DUmmie FUnnies around so a lot more people out there can find out what the liberals are planning if Obama wins. And thanx to Slate writer, Timothy Noah, for prematurely releasing the not so hidden liberal agenda. By doing so, you might have pulled the rug from under an Obama victory which you are already celebrating.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2008; 2ndamendment; ageofconsentlaws; antiamericanism; bang; banglist; barackobama; blameamericafirst; democrats; dummiefunnies; elections; gungrabber; marxist; nobama08; secondamendment; sexualizingchildren; starkravingsocialism; timothynoah; usefulidiot
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You're just $10 away from seeing the Joe Biden video. An alternate source of the raw Joe Biden video has been found but it is expensive. However, I know someone upstairs will probably purchase it since it will have a big effect on this election. Just to keep the faith with those of you who might be casting doubt on the very existence of this video, here is a brief CLIP of the July 23, 1986 ABC News broadcast. You can see Biden at about the 1:25 mark but his rant only lasts about 30 seconds due to selective editing. However, I assure you that the raw video footage shows Biden ranting solo for much, much longer and his mannerisms are much, much more damaging. Right now seeing if the RAW FOOTAGE can be made public. The networks could easily make this public but do you think they will? Of course, if they had such a video featuring Sarah Palin they would have broadcast it within days of her being named Obama's running mate.

The raw footage of Joe Biden will definitely have an effect on this election IF it is made public since most rational people would fear Biden being just a heartbeat away from the Oval Office after watching the video.

1 posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:05 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix

In before the ping!!


2 posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:35 AM PDT by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: PJ-Comix

IB4TP


3 posted on 10/08/2008 10:21:40 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Who is the real Barack Obama?)
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To: PJ-Comix

IB4TP again baby!


4 posted on 10/08/2008 10:22:56 AM PDT by EarthBound (Ex Deo,gratia. Ex astris,scientia (What I'm really voting for is Palin in 2012!))
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To: PJ-Comix

top 10!


5 posted on 10/08/2008 10:23:09 AM PDT by txroadkill (Do it for Sarah!)
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To: PJ-Comix
You're just $10 away from seeing the Joe Biden video.

$10? Sounds fair to me.

6 posted on 10/08/2008 10:23:31 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Who is the real Barack Obama?)
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To: txroadkill

even better - you’re IB4TP! Welcome to this most exclusive of clubs!


7 posted on 10/08/2008 10:23:43 AM PDT by EarthBound (Ex Deo,gratia. Ex astris,scientia (What I'm really voting for is Palin in 2012!))
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To: PJ-Comix
0bama’s campaign in a nutshell pity he will not express it on the campaign trail.
8 posted on 10/08/2008 10:24:15 AM PDT by CzarNicky (The problem with bad ideas is that they seemed like good ideas at the time.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10??


9 posted on 10/08/2008 10:25:14 AM PDT by Dooderbutt (Al Gore - now the most sanctimonious lardbutt Yank on the planet ~ D. Thompson)
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To: Dooderbutt

Wow and IB4TP too!!!! Woo hoo!


10 posted on 10/08/2008 10:25:36 AM PDT by Dooderbutt (Al Gore - now the most sanctimonious lardbutt Yank on the planet ~ D. Thompson)
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To: PJ-Comix
"Let's standardize the federal age of consent at 16!"

Will Pitt would breathe a sigh of relief.

11 posted on 10/08/2008 10:29:26 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel
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To: PJ-Comix

“The perfume hasn’t been this strong since October 1964, the eve of Lyndon Johnson’s landside presidential victory. It’s the sweet smell of success that you can take for granted.”

Hey Hey LBJ, How many babies did you kill today?

Yeah, they loved him after another 4 years, right?


12 posted on 10/08/2008 10:30:22 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...
PING!

Be sure to check out this VIDEO of Joe Biden in this July 23, 1986 ABC News Broadcast. Biden appears at about the 1:25 mark and is on for only about 30 seconds. However, this newscast edited out the incredible long (and insane) rant by Biden. I saw a summary of the raw footage and his rant might last as long as 10 minutes. I do know it lasted quite a while and shows Biden to be quite unstable in the extreme. Hopefully the raw footage can be revealed to the public.

13 posted on 10/08/2008 10:31:43 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: The_Victor
You'll forgive them if they take a moment to taste it, savor it, perhaps bottle a little extra to tide them over during the next conservative ascendancy.

I'm awaiting a conservative ascendency too. And I won't see it even if Obama loses. Where do they get this tripe?

Bush's low approval rating is because conservative don't believe he was conservative ENOUGH!

14 posted on 10/08/2008 10:32:21 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel

TTBP and (a personal first) IB4TP.

PJ must be distracted by a phone call from Gov Vilsac?


15 posted on 10/08/2008 10:32:55 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel
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To: PJ-Comix
America isn't the greatest nation in the world. We think it is only because it's our country. Duh!

Show me which ones are better. put up or shut up.

16 posted on 10/08/2008 10:34:06 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix

Finally! A liberal states what they realy believe.


17 posted on 10/08/2008 10:35:37 AM PDT by Brett66 (Where government advances, and it advances relentlessly , freedom is imperiled -Janice Rogers Brown)
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To: PJ-Comix
America's official languages should be English and Spanish!

Well which is it? English or Spanish? Why not just go whole hog and demand that The USA become the UEsA?

18 posted on 10/08/2008 10:36:48 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix
I'm glad the Muslims whupped the Christians during the Crusades! Served 'em right

Another liberal advocating the murder, rape, and enslavement of Christians. He must have loved all the chapters of history on this when he went to school.

19 posted on 10/08/2008 10:38:03 AM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix
If a liberal farts by himself and there is on one else around to smell it, will it count as a scent?

I'm sure to a liberal, it will smell like potpourri.

20 posted on 10/08/2008 10:38:19 AM PDT by GOP_Raider (If I wanted a Chicago politician as my President, I'd vote for Richard Daley)
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel

Clippy at homey.


21 posted on 10/08/2008 10:38:38 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel
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To: PJ-Comix

The inner workings of a perverted mind.


22 posted on 10/08/2008 10:39:14 AM PDT by Vision ("Test everything. Hold on to the Good." 1 Thessalonians 5:21)
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To: PJ-Comix
Like the houseguests in Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None, swing states are disappearing one by one..

Ha ha, you read Agatha Christie!

23 posted on 10/08/2008 10:40:15 AM PDT by GOP_Raider (If I wanted a Chicago politician as my President, I'd vote for Richard Daley)
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To: PJ-Comix
Okay, if you live in the Washington, DC area then you might want to try locating the C-SPAN raw footage of the extended Biden video at the National Archives. The lady I called at C-SPAN told me that is where it is and, wow, did she sound peeved for some reason. The networks also have this raw footage but since it would be harmful to Obama/Biden, I doubt they will release it so best bet now seems to be locating the C-SPAN raw footage in the National Archives. Perhaps it is in a cardboard box atop the wooden box containing the Lost Ark.

This is the video that will affect the election for sure!

24 posted on 10/08/2008 10:40:47 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: PJ-Comix

“The raw footage of Joe Biden will definitely have an effect on this election IF it is made public since most rational people would fear Biden being just a heartbeat away from the Oval Office after watching the video.”

I hope we get it.


25 posted on 10/08/2008 10:42:56 AM PDT by scratcher
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel
PJ must be distracted by a phone call from Gov Vilsac?

Wear the Bear!

26 posted on 10/08/2008 10:45:38 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (Who is the real Barack Obama?)
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To: scratcher

Hey, I’m juggling at least 4 major projects right now plus I don’t live in the DC area so I have to hand this project off to someone else. You have the info you need, so someone out there find it. Believe me, the raw footage is quite something to behold or how else do you think I remembered it after all these years?


27 posted on 10/08/2008 10:46:33 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: All
If these bastards get power, we must resist them at every turn. We must defund their bullhorn, which is the media. Boycott their sponsors! Fight every attempt towards nationalizing industry. We must become unsmelly hardworking protesters. We must become anti-hippies. While the smelly irrational hippies riot on the street, we must riot with our wallets. Do not give blue companies one damn cent. Destroy Hollywood by holding your dollars and let the rats get real jobs. Let them attempt to attack us behind cardboard signs reading, “Will Make Believe For Food” and them pay for their smug elitism.
28 posted on 10/08/2008 10:49:23 AM PDT by Big Guy and Rusty 99 (If Benito Mussolini was IL DUCE, Barack Obama is ILL DOUCHE!)
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To: PJ-Comix

I’ll see what I can do to help.


29 posted on 10/08/2008 10:52:27 AM PDT by scratcher
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To: scratcher

I posted the brief clip so people will have confidence that the video exists. This was a VERY SMALL segment of what Joe Biden actually did which was act like a complete fruitcake over an extended period of time. The networks have the raw footage but won’t release it. If they had such footage of Sarah Palin they would have broadcast it within days of her announcement as Veep.


30 posted on 10/08/2008 11:09:23 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: All
Here is the info from footage.net as to what ABC News has in its archives. It looks like Biden might have been ranting for a full 10 minutes. Good luck trying to get the raw footage from ABC News because they are currently running cover for Obama/Biden:

Tape Number: DCTA22633E
Title: SOUTH AFRICA
Media Type: Tape
Library: ABC
Date: 07/23/1986
Content: 11:30:58:05 SENATE FOREIGN RELATIONS COMMITTEE HEARING ON US POLICY TOWARD SOUTH AFRICA. MS OF SENATOR JESSE HELMS (R-NC) QUESTIONING US SECRETARY OF STATE GEORGE SHULTZ, WHO IS TESTIFYING BEFORE THE COMMITTEE.
11:38:38:02 ms of senator joseph biden (d-del) questioning shultz. he angrily excoriates administration policy toward south africa. he feels the us should side with the black majority in south africa.
11:48:17:22 ms of senator charles mathias (r-md).
CI:
PERSONALITIES: BIDEN, JOSEPH.
PERSONALITIES: HELMS, JESSE.
PERSONALITIES: MATHIAS, CHARLES.
PERSONALITIES: SHULTZ, GEORGE.

31 posted on 10/08/2008 11:28:25 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: All

BTW, in the entire time that Biden was talking I don’t remember him once talking like a normal person. He was screaming the whole time and sounded quite irrational.


32 posted on 10/08/2008 11:30:03 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: PJ-Comix
Check this new thread out: (It's not FUnnie, but thought others should see it)

themartyred (1000+ posts) Wed Oct-08-08 03:45 PM Original message

we need some people dressed up as KKK members to try and get in at a Palin rally I supposed they'd be arrested, but man, what a story it'd make - they could simply say - "we are confused - we heard her on the television saying things we strongly liked and wanted to come and support her, and if this country is so arrogant to ignore its roots, then we'll support her being the next Grand Wizard of our group!"

That'd make me laugh... The McSame/Plain campaign has turned into a rallying cry for hysterical bigotry. They have no shame apparently.

33 posted on 10/08/2008 12:52:57 PM PDT by KJC1
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To: KJC1

DNC brownshirts. They’d do better to show up dressed like that at public appearances from Robert Byrd (D-KKK) but they have no honor.


34 posted on 10/08/2008 1:13:10 PM PDT by weegee (Obama's a uniter?"I want you to argue with them (friends,neighbors,Republicans) & get in their face")
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To: PJ-Comix

These DUmmie remarks aren’t even laughable; they are scary. Especially if Mr. O wins. This would truly be the triumph of evil.

To my fellow Jews — this Yom Kippur, pray really hard.


35 posted on 10/08/2008 2:03:37 PM PDT by MoochPooch (I'm a compassionate cynic.)
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To: PJ-Comix
There's a new scent in the air.

Can you smell . . . what Barack's got cookin'?!

36 posted on 10/08/2008 2:10:45 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (B.O. Plenty.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I think Karl Marx had some valuable insights into capitalist economies!

Is that you, Barack Obama?

37 posted on 10/08/2008 2:14:09 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (B.O. Plenty.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I'm a liberal! . . . I'm a leftist! . . . I'm a democratic socialist!

It IS you, Barack!

38 posted on 10/08/2008 2:16:50 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (B.O. Plenty.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I think Mormons are kooks!

Sounds like most FReepers.

39 posted on 10/08/2008 2:27:24 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day ("If someone is coming to kill you, rise early and kill him first" (Sanhedrin 72a and parallels).)
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To: PJ-Comix
America's official languages should be English and Spanish!

¡Contra la pared, compadre! ¡Sí, se puede!

40 posted on 10/08/2008 2:35:49 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day ("If someone is coming to kill you, rise early and kill him first" (Sanhedrin 72a and parallels).)
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To: PJ-Comix
America isn't the greatest nation in the world.

Right. Cuba is. Everyone knows that.


41 posted on 10/08/2008 2:41:44 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day ("If someone is coming to kill you, rise early and kill him first" (Sanhedrin 72a and parallels).)
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To: GOP_Raider; PJ-Comix

My friend Hercule Poirot and I would like to know what’s wrong with reading Agatha Christie?

After all, she had standards and taste. I learned form her that no matter how expensive the dress, one should look at the shoes.

That’s how I know Sarah Palin is a class act, while Michelle Obama is trash.


42 posted on 10/08/2008 3:12:28 PM PDT by Miss Marple
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To: PJ-Comix




I really don't know if the video will be found or if it still exists. But, here is a partial transcript if anyone is interested.
43 posted on 10/08/2008 5:11:22 PM PDT by faq
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To: faq

Thanx for that partial transcript. It does show Biden was ranting for an extended period-—up to ten minutes. However, the transcript doesn’t really convey the bizarre histrionic by Biden. Even he later said he was embarrassed by his performance.


44 posted on 10/08/2008 6:24:24 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (FREE the Joe Biden raw video!!!)
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To: PJ-Comix; faq; Charles Henrickson

This could backfire, if I understand the context of this correctly. We’re talking about apartheid, and I’d get pretty passionate about it too. I remember my disgust at Jerry Falwell’s public support of the policy.


45 posted on 10/08/2008 6:57:57 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (McCain / Palin '08. Write-ins and protest votes won't help America.)
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To: PJ-Comix
There's a new scent in the air.

Bullshit.

46 posted on 10/08/2008 6:59:27 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (McCain / Palin '08. Write-ins and protest votes won't help America.)
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To: PJ-Comix
If you're a Democrat, you haven't felt it tickle your nostrils since October 1996

The last time cocaine was affordable.

47 posted on 10/08/2008 7:00:49 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (McCain / Palin '08. Write-ins and protest votes won't help America.)
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To: PJ-Comix
ELECTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES

McCAIN IS NOT OBAMA LITE

THERE IS MORE THAN A DIME'S WORTH OF DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE TWO MAJOR PARTIES

IT'S OK TO VOTE AGAINST THE WRONG EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT SURE YOU'RE VOTING FOR THE PERFECT

48 posted on 10/08/2008 7:03:14 PM PDT by ExGeeEye (I'm Right Guard, here to prevent B. O.)
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To: PJ-Comix
The perfume hasn't been this strong since October 1964, the eve of Lyndon Johnson's landside presidential victory.

Yeah, that worked out well.

49 posted on 10/08/2008 7:03:19 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (McCain / Palin '08. Write-ins and protest votes won't help America.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I think Karl Marx had some valuable insights into capitalist economies!

LFT! Value is a capitalist paradigm! Gatherer/Hunter is where it is. Get yourself right with the commune.

50 posted on 10/08/2008 7:13:42 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (McCain / Palin '08. Write-ins and protest votes won't help America.)
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