Skip to comments.Alternate Names for the “Assault Weapons” Ban
Posted on 03/07/2009 1:05:07 AM PST by marktwain
Since actual assault weapons are already regulated and very hard for a civilian to own in America (to the point theyre pretty much never used in a crime), I had thought the act to ban random semi-autos needed a more accurate name than the Assault Weapons Ban. Heres some more ideas:
* The Piss Off People with Guns Act
* The Not All the Nazis Ideas Were Bad Act
* The Disarming Law Abiding People Sure Is Easier than Disarming Criminals Act
* The Sissies Scared of Loud Noise Act
* The Freedom Is too Scary Act
* The Ban as Many Guns as We Can Trick People into Allowing Act
* The I Dont Know Crap About Guns, But Im Told These Ones Are Bad Act
* The Impossible to Vote for If You Have Functioning Male Parts Act
The Firearms Fairness Act
Because certain firearms should be illegal to possess for an equivalent time that they were legal to possess.
The Criminals Workplace Safety Act
For obvious reasons.
The Hoplophobia Protection Act
Well there are Traditional Rifles, and Modern Rifles.
They came up with cutesy Orwellian language for the Modern Rifles (I’ve been reading things talking about “assault style” rifles...I’m curious what about their styling makes them assault-y), so they’ll ban those first.
Once those are long gone, all rifles will be Traditional Rifles. So then they’ll have to make another arbitrary division. They’ll call every caliber the military adopted after decades of success among private individuals a “military caliber”, banning everything but the fake calibers like .25 and .28 ACP.
On the pistol front, it’ll just be another Magazine Ban. DC has already redefined any pistol as a “machine gun”, so they might be so brazen as to do that as well.
Plenty of names to choose from, but it boils down to a Magazine Ban, and Modern Rifle Ban.
To change the subject for a moment consider this, the Porkulus Bill we objected to so much recently. Most of the spending is several years from now. The rate that our economy is failing there won't BE a U.S. gummint by then. So what the hell does that bill matter?
Back on subject. What the hell does a gun law matter? Let them pass whatever damn law they want. Anybody with a brain HAS the things they need. All we have to do is survive the chaos that is coming and rebuild from the ground up with the original government the Founders put in place over 200 years ago. Sort of a "system reset". At this point Zero and Pelousy and COmpany can pound sand because nothing they do is gonna matter a bit.
“Sort of a ‘system reset’.”
I didn’t know the Hillary overcharged buttons were commercially available. Then again, I’d think there’d be a tidy business in them for every American who’s paying through the nose for others’ upkeep.
Meant as sardonically funny, but sadly, true.
“We just love to ban stuff, it’s in our genes.”
“We’d ban cigarettes, but we’d lose so much tax money.”
“The ATF need something to do”
“We don’t like them, so you shouldn’t have them.”
If at first you don’t succeed; try, try again. Because, hey; the sheeple have a short attention span.
I’d call it (any “gun control” act, actually) the “DemocRats are Whiny, Bedwetting, Cringing Cowards Act of (19XX|20XX)”
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