Those little kimbers have really big bores.
Heh Heh. This is my personal carry.
Posted on 01/28/2010 1:30:23 PM PST by Notoriously Conservative
From Notoriously Conservative:
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah Night Before Last.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head isn't it?
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me(preventing you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again).
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as the tanks of the four other people in the gas station, with your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful.
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet(that made his day). I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb, after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, even though I was only on the phone with her for a little over a day now. So what's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning high level government officials as possible targets. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you, but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.
Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours,
Alex
That just rocks!
LOL!! This story is just too good to be true, but I pray that it is!
That’s why people are so friendly to strangers down here.
You never know who’s armed.
That just rocks!
Absolutely beautiful!
I will be laughing for the rest of the day over this.
Evening laugh....should help get the bad taste of last night’s SOU out of your mind.
...it’s a classic!
Those little kimbers have really big bores.
Heh Heh. This is my personal carry.
Great story except that the mugger turned into the muggee and the original victim is now a thug.
I don’t understand this. He should have just shot the mugger in the head and killed him.
He is a thug by conjecture, though some might view him otherwise. Doubt it’s true, but it is funny.
This has been floating around the net for at least four years now. It’s bogus.
ping
Some years ago a guy posted something similar on the Firing Line board, only he made the guys (2) strip naked, then chased them off. he threw their clothes in the trash, then called the police saying there were two homosexuals chasing each other through the neighborhood.
Then again, we have this interesting YouTube account about rednecks chasing a BMW HERE. (six minutes, good stuff about 4:30, but worth it for the ending - coarse language warning)
“This has been floating around the net for at least four years now. It’s bogus”
Maybe so, but why let the truth get in the way of a good story?
I love the Thank God For Guns one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KvO-8IvoCI
was an absolute scream!
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