Skip to comments.Would you dump a woman for using a coupon?
Posted on 02/23/2010 7:10:06 AM PST by PJ-Comix
I was reading dating advice for women from men at Cosmo and came across a rather amusing letter to "the guy guru who answers your most pressing sex and love questions." The letter is from a woman who is upset that a guy used a coupon to buy her dinner:
I went out for dinner with this guy, and it was great we got along well, and there was a definite spark. But when it came time to pay, he pulled out a coupon. I'm hardly a princess, but that totally killed it for me. Am I being too hard on him?
It was unquestionably a boneheaded maneuver on his part, but yes, cutting him loose on that one faux pas sounds extreme. There are factors to weigh. For one, how old is the dude? If he's still in school or graduated recently, it could just be that he hasn't dated a lot and was short on funds the economy isn't exactly booming right now. And to be fair, he didn't ask you to go dutch, so he did still take you out to dinner.
If he's older and financially stable, then you have more reason to be turned off. Any guy with a little experience should know that you don't flash coupons on a first date you bide your time till the chick is in the bathroom, then feverishly shove it into the waiter's hand! In all seriousness, it could be a sign that he'd turn out to be a cheapskate.
I agree. It'd be a turn off. Take her on a picnic. Take her to some place half that price. But pulling out a coupon on the first date, I don't know if I could get past that and I fully appreciate frugality.
“Except you can also buy the luxuries with coupons. “
yes but you can now buy more of it ;)
I would think there are ways to be discreet. Tell the server/maitre de/greeter, quietly that you have a coupon. And prepare before hand, wrap it around your credit card or place it among the cash.
“But on the flip side I would never use a coupon on a 1st couple of dates, it’s tacky and shows you are cheap.”
On subsequent dates it would be fine, but on the first date? Tacky and cheap.
“Same with coupons on the the 1st date, seriously how much could he have saved? $5 - $10? If the woman was even potentially worth it, he should have sucked it up and paid full price.”
First impressions are important. Frugal is fine, but a person should know when to be classy and charming. First date coupon sends a creepy message.
If I were dating, I would want to date you. :-)
My fiancee wouldn’t go dutch on our first date, nor even let me leave the tip, thought I offered to do both. Later on, I did often pick up the tab. (Seemed right since I made a significant bit more than he did then.)
Yeah he was already using the meal to get cheap sex. You can’t double up on coupons for that! ;-)
When using "stealth" coupons, she never actually sees the coupon. Hee! Hee!
No, I’ve never lived in Boston. ;-D
Coupons are wonderful, and I think anyone who uses them in an organized way is probably financially responsible. That’s a good indication of character, imo.
“A sensible man would intentionally use a coupon on the first date, to weed out the women who dont appreciate the value of a dollar.”
Its kind of obvious why she was single, isn’t it?
My New Years Resolution was to live like a King while spending very little. I’m not there yet but at the rate I’m going I should be there before the end of the year. To me its a mental game. First see things you want cheap and then figure out how to get them via coupons. Google search is one great way. Almost everything out there has coupons that you can print out. I used to think gasoline would be impossible to purchase cheap via coupons. WRONG! And anybody who pays full price for a Las Vegas vacation has to out of his mind. Discount packages are easily available. And now I am working on how to get cheap airlines tickets via couponing. Not there yet, but I KNOW it can be solved.
And ... he'd be right.
Food is the easiest thing to buy for almost nothing via coupons. For a long time I thought both meat and produce were off the table as far as buying at a steep discount or for almost nothing. WRONG! I have gotten so good at it that I now have the ability feed a hundred unwed LCMS Lutherans for a week for almost nothing.
WRong! Dinner out does NOT equal sex after.
I would dump a chick for using Federal Reserve notes. If she wants to hang with the Sloth, she’ll pay in gold, or barter. Paying with fiat paper is tacky.
Well, then we really are dealing with a guy living in mom's basement because this is the first date.
PJComix -- I wouldn't care much beyond the first date. But, a first date is a first date. You know first impressions and all that.
Once, in school, I had a bartending job and I started a second job at a different place. As with bartending you have "regulars" who follow you form place to place. So, one of my "regulars" finagled himself a date with one of the waitresses.
He brought her to a bbq, where he brought a few 2 liter bottles of soda. Upon leaving, realizing no one drank his soda, he picked it up and took it home with him. She never went out with him again for that reason. And I never lived it down. (:
You point out the essential woman's perspective. One major purpose of the date is for the woman to see how much money the guy is willing to spend in order to be with her, as a measure of how much he values her. The more money, the higher her perceived status in his eyes.
He took her to a restaurant that took coupons?! On a first date! Unless it was a very casual “let’s have lunch” type of thing, this guy is cheap!
If the guy is financially strapped, it would have been a better move to prepare a nice dinner for her at home rather than go to a coupon restaurant.
OK, I’m in. Give me the website address! I am constantly amazed at your couponing prowess.
I totally agree.
It would mean that IF I were wearing Old Spice after shave and cologne. BTW, the Old Spice company once sent me a bunch of great coupons because I wrote them a letter praising their products.
Women like to receive the sliced-off reproductive organs of some plant. I won't go into the symbolism.
In forty eight hours, that expensive dinner will just be poo. The flowers are a better deal - the ones I got for my wife for Valentine's Day are still hanging in there after ten days.
You must be quite wealthy.
Well, from a guy’s perspective, is she interested in him or how much he can spend on her? If its the latter, he’s better off without her.
As I said earlier, this guy is a genius. He’s got a perfect method for weeding out the superficial trash.
I had a friend who was pretty wealthy. He had the nice car, but then he had an average car as well. On first dates, he would always use the average car. He would not give away how rich he was, in fact, he would go out of his way to appear that he wasn’t rich at all. Then he would have a better gauge of what the woman was really all about.
If I were still single, and a girl got mad because I’d used a coupon, I’d dump the selfish, vacuous little twit in a heartbeat.
Not the memory of the dinner though. A nice, long leisurely dinner with a little wine and reminiscing is nice.
I told my husband early on when dating, don't ever buy me flowers or jewelry unless you get them off the back of some guys truck. (:
Go for it, buddy. Our new TV is being delivered today, but not bought on coupons :) I’m dismantling all the wires from the old TV, and took a break to check FR. The old TV is going to a young family we know.
Start at NeverPayRetailAgain.Net. That is the starting point. Then go to the MANY couponing forums on the web like HotCouponWorld.Com. Constant research is necessary. I spend a MINIMUM of an hour per day researching.
Yeah you may be right. Most girls today probably like sex before dinner without feeling obligated. ;-)
But then, you spend a fortune on the printer ink cartridges printing those coupons one per A4 page!
I'm actually planning on buying a 26" flatscreen TV via coupons. Now that I think about it, I think I will buy that before the Kindle Reader. Depends on my mood.
My ULTIMATE electronic product would be a Bose Wave Radio purchased via coupons.
Except that printer ink cartridges can easily be bought with coupons.
Except you can also buy the luxuries with coupons.
... I wasn’t the guy in line, so can you tell us the suggested website, especially for luxury stuff?? Please and thanks in advance,
I agree. Any savings anywhere are a good thing.
If I wasn't married, I would try that on my next night out. My wife does have a coupon book, we both agree that we are cheap dates.
“Whipping a coupon out at the end of the 1st date kind of says to me that I wasnt worth paying full price”
Are you for sale to the high bidder?
What words would you choose to describe a woman who is for sale to the high bidder?
I’m a woman and I say dump her. I can see someone like this keeping a guy in the poorhouse and then some. Course I am basing part of this on my own attitudes about spending, and by observing a ahhh well a social climbing person in my own family.
Someone who's a hopin' for a bidding war! (:
She is nuts for not asking him where he got the coupon!
Check one of my previous replies. I gave TWO websites that you can use as starting points for your research. Remember, constant research is all important but the payoff is tons of freebies or near freebies. Well worth it.
Psst! You can even get the coupons on eBay.
Answer: Dump that guy, and fast.
You’ll be doing him a favor.
Seems you are unaware of what restaurants DO take coupons. Would you rather get the $25 entrée without coupon, or $50 with? You'd be surprised...
On a first date!
Which is more important: being with him at a thoughtfully fancy restaurant, or ensuring he wastes money?
Women can be weird about coupon use. I’ve used food coupons rarely in my sixty years, but my wife has a coupon for everything, god bless her. However, just try to give a gift certificate for money to my wife instead of a tangible gizmo. Grounds for divorce!!
Exactly. I think that would show a lot more about his character. You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat wait staff and cashiers.
But then, what kind of a man would read COSMO? (Did ya subscribe to it using coupons?)
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