Skip to comments.DUmmie FUnnies 05-15-11 (DUmmie whines: "I Want To Smack Every Teabagger I See.")
Posted on 05/15/2011 7:59:40 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson
It's the Daze of Whine and Poses at DUmmieland. But then, I repeat myself. For DUmmies are nothing if not a bunch of whiney liberals. Case in point: DUmmie ChoppinBroccoli, who is upset because he might have to do something on his own to take care of his parental responsibiliities, rather than have the goverment do it for him. You see, the taxpayers in his district chose not to pass an additional levy, so now ChoppinBroccoli, poor baby, might actually have to transport his own kid to all-day kindergarten, rather than having a school bus do it for him. WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
ChoppinBroccoli blames the EEEE-vil rich for this, of course, those greedy misers who won't pay an extra $15 so his kid can take a bus. ChoppinBroccoli is so mad, he posted this THREAD, "I Want To Smack Every Teabagger I See."
Now the kicker is, ChoppinBroccoli is a LAWYER, and he lives in a nice SUBURB, so it's not like he's some poor shlub like bobbolink, living in the back of a Buick. If he doesn't have any friends or family willing to help, he could well afford to take care of some other arrangement for his child's transportation. But he's a Democrat, so he expects other people to pay his bills and do everything for him.
So let us hop on the short bus and get dropped off at DUmmieland, where the comments are in Read-Whine Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, who somehow manages to get his daughter to school without a bus, is in the [brackets]:
I Want To Smack Every Teabagger I See
[That's some violent rhetoric there, ChoppinBroccoli. Are you a Broccoli stalker?]
Just a little background information first. My oldest son turned 5 this month and is going to be starting Kindergarten in the fall. In the school district where we live, there are several elementary schools, but only one of them has all day, every day Kindergarten. . . .
[Choppin looked, but he couldn't find a 24/7 kindergarten.]
Well, last week, we found out that our son got into the all day Kindergarten program, so we were pretty excited about that.
Between my wife and I, our work schedules would have taken a serious hit trying to accommodate pick-ups and drop-offs for just a half-day Kindergarten program, and we were stressing out over how we would get that to work. . . .
because the recent school levy (voted on last week) was defeated, the school district was cutting out all transportation services (aka busing). Translation: I'm going to have to drive my child to school every day in the Fall.
[NO! SHOCKING!! UNHEARD OF!!! How could they be so CRUEL????]
but the doors to the elementary school don't open until 9:05 a.m.
Guess what time I normally need to be in Court on the days I have Court.
[Mm, 9:05 a.m.?]
And since EVERY PARENT with a child in that school will ALSO be driving his/her child to school that day, what do you think the chances are that I'll be able to drive up to the door, drop him off, give him a quick good-bye, and then get immediately back on the road, given the line of cars trying to do the same thing?
[WOW! The prisoners on the Gulag Archipelago didn't have it this hard!]
Here's what irks me about this whole thing. We live in a fairly well-to-do suburb of Columbus. . . . In the run-up to the vote on the school levy issue, there was a very visible and well-funded "Vote No on Issue 7" campaign waged. . . . And nothing would upset me more than to drive home through the "rich neighborhood" and see these HUGE houses with "Vote No on 7" signs in their front yards.
[D*mn democracy! Who do those voters think they are??]
Yeah, I'm sure that extra fifteen bucks you're going to have to pay in taxes to support your local schools is going to REALLY break your bank, @ssholes.
[Mr. Lawyer ChoppinBroccoli, who lives in this well-to-do suburb, fails to see the irony in his not wanting to spend $15 of his own to pitch in on carpooling.]
So I said . . . only HALF-facetiously, that every time I have a scheduling conflict that makes it difficult to drop my son off at school at 9:05 in the morning, I'm going to drive him up to the door of one of these houses with the "Vote No on 7" signs in the yard and tell them, "Here. YOU drive him to school today. Hope you choke on your 15 bucks, @sshole."
[ChoppinBroccoli is only $15 away from having No Child Left Behind.]
I'm getting so d*mn sick of living in "all taxes are evil" land.
[You tell, 'em, Choppin! DOWN with democracy! DOWN with voting! UP with taxes! Get a BUS, for Gaia's sake, and come get this kid off my hands!]
[Now to the other DUmmies . . .]
End corporate fascism in this country. It is dangerous!
[Whatever the problem--no money for school buses, jobs being outsourced, lint--the cause is always the same: corporatist facist pigs.]
An ounce of money for good schools is worth a pound of money for prisons.
[If somebody doesn't come up with that 15 bucks to get Choppin's boy on a bus, HE'LL END UP DOING HARD TIME! Come ON, people!!]
We really need all adults in this country to go through a remedial educational program to understand the whole point of taxes and of collective action.
[Load 'em on a bus and send 'em off to Reeducation Camp!]
As it is now, the Stupid is phenomenal.
[The Stupid is strong with this one.]
when you have so much and you don't want to share a simple $15 bucks more in taxes to help our future - our children - do better so they can compete with children around the world, that's taking greed to a whole new low. And, sadly, this new phenomenon is very much exclusively an American affliction.
[MOVE THAT BUS!]
I think we have a sociopathic country, perhaps a term is sociopathic capitalism.
[I thought the term was corporate fascism.]
Just ask them if they would prefer educated tax paying people or criminals breaking into their houses.
[Save JuniorBroccoli from a life of crime! Only $15! My G*D, people!]
That's a pretty healthy whine you typed up. It's called life. Deal with it.
[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]
you have a practical issue to deal with and i suggest trying to find a parent in your neighborhood who needs a few extra bucks and would be willing to care for your child during those hours when you must be at work.
[Wow, what a concept! Coming up with a non-government solution!]
Do you want your child in "all day every day Kindergarten" so he will advance educationally? Or, is it more beneficial as a sort of "all day every day" day care....so you and your wife can pursue your professional interests?
[Careful, you're getting a little too close to home. . . . ChoppinBroccoli responds . . .]
My oldest son is very advanced for his age, and he's been in a daycare that has given him an education (as opposed to just watching him and playing with him while we work) for the last 5 years.
[Translation: We dumped him off as soon as he was born.]
Can't say I blame the voters for shooting down the levy if a significant portion of it was to pay for transportation of children to a magnet school because parents want the luxury of more school hours to accommodate their work schedules. Sounds like you'll have to do what about 99% of all other working parents do - either hire someone to watch your children before and after school or put them in private kindergarten.
[OK, ChoppinBroccoli won the Whiney Liberal Award, but YOU, DUmmie lynne, you win today's Kewpie Doll for your Brief Moment of Mental Clarity®! Go to the head of the class! . . . Back to Choppin for summing up . . .]
All 3 of my kids have been in daycare since they were born. The younger 2 still are, and will continue to be. Our oldest is going to school NOT to have somebody to watch him while we work, but because we actually want our kids to go to school. I thought every parent wanted education for their child, but apparently I was wrong.
[Some parents actually want to form a bond with their children, instead of shipping them off to strangers, but hey, that's me.]
As far as smacking teabaggers go, there's a whole bunch of them at DNC headquaters.
Oh brother. Is this a typical Liberal Democrat or what?
At least ONE of the DUmmies was getting the idea that maybe the cheap bastard could pay somebody to watch his kid and get him to school while Daddy and Mommy were at work doing something they considered to be more useful than taking care of their crumb cruncher.
That is at least until he turns 6 and can walk the miles to school himself. Mom and Dad will be so proud that day!
Unbelievable! A well-off lawyer posting such drivel at the DUmp? Really?? I was a bit heartened by some of the responses to him, though they may be LFTs.
Brilliant, as usual, Charles.
but the doors to the elementary school don’t open until 9:05 a.m.
My Kid’s prep school pre-care opens at 7 Am and I don’t make lawyer money.
You know ...this teabagger slam is actually starting to make me laugh at all the SALAD TOSSERs using the term...
YES SAD...SO SAD...READ MY PROFILE AND HE CAN CHOKE ON HIS BROCCOLI
Another “children for a fashion statement” liberal.
Don’t have kids if they are such a burden to the idiot.
The pathetic part is that it is never jsut $15.Mostr like an extra $15 on top of what they already pay for every $100K the home is worth.Seeing that most households now days do not have children under 18 in them most school levies are likely to go down to defeat especailly those for things like this.
The guy has 3 kids and hasn’t spent a freaking day with them for 5 years.
Not something I would want to broadcast to the nation via the internet.
Somebody should smack him or his wife.
I’m lower middle class and I can’t afford the property taxes much longer to pay for the school system, and too many other people are like me, all raising taxes would do is drive us out of our homes faster.
Makes me want to smack every Lawyer I see!
You know you’re really in bad shape when the DUmmies won’t rally to your side for a tax increase to make your life easier. Even though they were devout leftists the Dead Kennedys had this douchebag nailed when they titled one of their albums “Give Me Convenience or Give Me Death”.
Good evening Charles. Thank you for this one. This is more proof that Libs shouldn’t reproduce. When my two boys were young, my wife and I decided that the best thing for us to do was have her stay home with our children. She quit her job, we sold all of the stuff that was sucking up our cash, and built a secure environment for the daily lives of the kids. Looking back almost 30 years, this was the best decision we ever made.
I like how by using an inflammatory title about wanting to do violence to “teabaggers”, most of the DUmmies mindlessly agree, without really considering what the guy is saying: I’m a fairly well-to-do Yuppie lawyer with a two income household and I’m angry that my wife and I are slightly inconvenienced by having to alter our busy schedules and find a way to bring our kids to school ourselves. Normally, they would attack anyone whining about a “rich white guy problem” like this.
His username reminded me of Mocha’s video:
Dang! I misplaced my tiny violin! Otherwise I'd be able to play a sad little solo for Choppie.
Woohoo, a few sensible comments towards the end.
Children aren’t pets. If people don’t want to rear them they should not have them.
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