Skip to comments.Woman Comes Forward To Detail Atrocities In Herman Cainís Apartment (Satire Attempt)
Posted on 11/03/2011 6:17:34 PM PDT by writer33
Washington,D.C. With all of the accusations flying about what Herman Cain knew and when he knew it, one woman has dared to come forward and detail the atrocities of one horrific night in 1991. Previously, the woman was scared to come forward, but since Cains long train of abuses have been well-documented by the Politico, it only made sense to tell the public just what they can expect from a Cain presidency.
The woman, Sharon Itall, is now an influential insurance agent, but was once just the shell of a scarred woman after one night with Herman Cain. And since the allegations have surfaced, Sharon is willing to chronicle the events of that steamy, August night in Washington, D.C. In her opinion, there is simply no choice in the matter now.
Sharon says that the denigrating events all began at an office party. It began by floating a keg that Mr. Cain had purchased for our office party, stated Sharon. Needless to say we were drunk, but I had no idea that the evening would spiral into a night of hell.
TRED (The Right Elective Decisions) has not confirmed any of this story but feels compelled to keep you riveted to your computer screen. And this is the rest of her fateful story:
TRED: What exactly happened on that fateful night?
Sharon: Humiliation beyond belief. Thats what happened. (She begins to break down.)...
LAWL!!! OMG He made me pump gas, oh the hugh manatee!!!
Good news! I got my Cain yard sign and bumper sticker just in time to piss of liberals here in Crook County, IL home of Obamaland!!!
There’s more coming, but the next one is not Cain related.
Thank you, knittmom.
I think you’ve nailed it, Gator.
Good to “see” you back!
Thank you, Dengar. Glad you enjoyed it.
Ha. Actually, I thought it was going to be, "Are you or have you ever been a live-in maid?"
Thank you, NP. Glad you enjoyed it.
The way these hypersensitive morons are everyone will have to stand still and only discretely nod to others. One must do this all the time and in all instances. Anything else will be a capitol crime and bring you great grief.
Thank you, Pontiac. Glad you enjoyed it.
Thank you. It’s good to “be” back.
Don’t tell me . . . he forced her to listen to Chubby Checker songs from the 60’s. What a horrible night that must have been for her. And he made her do the twist? That’s over the line, pal.
That would've been a good question though. Thanks for reading, Chad. Glad you enjoyed it.
Because we all know you certainly don’t want to get wave at somebody and not get all your fingers up in the air. LOL!
In all seriousness, you are spot on, hal.
I guess it’s over for Cain now (LOL).
Way over the line, Saundra. LOL!
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