Posted on 06/09/2012 1:12:34 AM PDT by John Semmens
Vice-President Joe Biden told the graduating seniors of Cypress Bay High School (Fla.) that “it’s long past the time when Americans should be shifting away from traditional farming as a means of supplying food.”
“Let’s face it, farming is unnatural,” Biden pointed out. “Using sharp tools to cut into the earth, planting seeds in neat rows for efficient reaping (also done with sharp tools, I might add), piping in water from far away—these are all artificial methods that rape the land.”
Biden argued that “in a more primitive era such methods may have been unavoidable. But do we really need them today? Why can’t everyone just get their food from the supermarket? Jill and I have been doing that for as long as I can remember. Most of the stuff comes in boxes and cans. It’s all very clean. You don’t have to poke tools into the soil stirring up dust and polluting the air. If we can only convince more people to follow our example the environmental degradation being caused by farmers could be greatly reduced.”
The vice-president also hailed the doubling of the amount the government has spent on food stamps since 2008 as “further proof that there are other ways to feed our population without destroying the land.”
In support of Biden’s vision, the Environmental Protection Agency is deploying aerial drones to fly over agricultural areas “to gather evidence on those raping the land with these primitive farming techniques.” EPA Administrator Lisa Jackson declined to specify whether this evidence would be used to support prosecution of violators or whether the President would use it to select targets for drone-launched missile strikes. “I believe the President will choose the most appropriate enforcement mechanism on a case-by-case basis,” Jackson said.
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at...
http://azconservative.org/2012/06/09/president-says-private-sector-is-doing-fine/
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Yes, that would be Biden’s logic. We don't have to farm; we just need to go shopping. LOL.
Thanks, John, for the ping.
It’s sad when a lifetime moron contracts a mental disease and goes insane.
This is too good...hard to tell what is true and what is satire...with Biden it is all satire everytime he opens his mouth...what an ignorant POS...
John, you get me every time! :-)
I didn’t catch on ( and check the source) until the line, “Using sharp tools to cut into the earth, planting seeds in neat rows for efficient reaping (also done with sharp tools, I might add)..”
Very good! Sitting here laughing and laughing.
From the same guy who has rows of “natural” hairplugs.
From the same guy who has rows of “natural” hairplugs.
I expect soon that those EPA drones may become targets for armed farmers and ranchers.
Funny stuff!
Please add me to your ping list.
I think we should grow our frozen vegetables in Antarctica. We could save a lot of money on refrigeration that way.
Didn’t catch me. Made it two sentences through and I double-checked the byline.
Like others have said, the sad part is I can see Biden saying something that stupid so I had to check the source before I bought it.
I think the adminitstration trys to keep tight control of what Biden says but occasionally he catches his keepers off guard and says something monumentally stupid.
We have to feed all the presidents peeps ya know.
Joe Biden has in reality said things that are even less intelligent than that. I wonder who he plagiarized that from? ;)
good one John... LOL
Knocked another one out of the park, John!
Lisa Jackson? Anyone else besides me beginning to wonder about people named “Jackson”? My apologizes to anyone here sporting that name, but the list is worrisome: Lisa Jackson; Jesse Jackson; lame rocker Joe Jackson; weirdo Michael Jackson and clan; not-our-best-Pres Andrew Jackson; Sheila Jackson Lee; even the mighty, but mighty weird, Stonewall Jackson (big fan, BTW, but Jeez!) - probably lots of others. I mean, you got your occasional Van “Jones” and your Shep “Smith” and all, but “Jackson” seems in a whole ‘nother category. Who in the world was Jack? I obviously don’t know Jack.
OMG!! Got me again.
Wasn’t till i started to read the comments I caught on
You’re so bad!!
Just like it came out of BiteMe’s own feeble brain.
Well done, again!
Great one, John.
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