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UN food aid delivered to US schools
Associated Posers ^ | 2-26-2012 | geronl

Posted on 09/26/2012 7:36:53 PM PDT by GeronL

UN Food Aid Delivered to US Schools

(Associated Posers) – Savannah, Georgia – The shocking images broadcast around the world of hungry children being fed a bare subsistence diet is mobilizing the world to render aid. United Nations food trucks have begun arriving to avert an international disaster. Donor countries include China, which has furnished 500 tons of rice aboard a vessel en route to San Diego.

Supplemental food aid from Canada, including wheat, are being flown in. A line of UN-marked planes line the tarmac of Savannah-Hilton Head International Airport.

“Shockingly some of these schools cannot serve more than 350-400 calories” said one nutritionist from the Children's Fund International “This is a crisis of the first order. Something must be done to keep the United States from falling to third world status. If that happens, then poorer nations are going to be in dire straits”.

The new menu's were devised at the direction of First Lady Michelle Obama with an eye toward strict calorie intake limits. The austerity diet is to be enforced at all US public schools eventually. The limited caloric intake does not affect her diet though, tonight's campaign fundraising dinner is a meal of lobster and cocktails.

A severe drought and a government policy that puts 40% of the corn crop into gas tanks has caused cow and pig herds to be culled, setting up another catastrophe for next year. “We can see it coming but it would take a much bigger crisis to get these politicians to drop the ethanol policy” said one source within the USDA “It is disheartening to witness government policies doing this to my country”.

“These food deliveries are meant to supplement the falling caloric intake. The kids are hungry, the food they have been given is second rate and unpalatable because of the drought and government policies. This has never happened in their life times and it must be quite a shock” said an official with the Savannah Independent School District “The fall from a prosperous first world nation to one where children don't get enough to eat is never pretty”

Across the world there are many countries where the images of meager school lunches might not seem so bad, but they miss the point. If the US goes down, who becomes the breadbasket that can feed the poorer countries?

“I'm hungry” said Angela Polly, 8, after eating a meager meal of hummus and black bean salad “I don't want to go to P.E. (Physical Education), I don't have the energy”. Many other children and parents agree. Dharma Polly, Angela's mother, said “If something does not change soon, I'm afraid for this country and the future”.

“Americans are not used to this, they have become soft as a super power” said a UN official “The sight of UN trucks delivering food to children will be seen as a national failure, many will feel like they have personally failed. This is natural.”


TOPICS: Agriculture; Education; Food; Humor
KEYWORDS:
do I really need a satire warning?
1 posted on 09/26/2012 7:36:55 PM PDT by GeronL
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To: Vendome; Country Gal; John Semmens; The Looking Spoon; cripplecreek

bump


2 posted on 09/26/2012 7:37:46 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL

yes, because the best satire is the satire you think is real ;)


3 posted on 09/26/2012 7:42:21 PM PDT by cableguymn (peace through strength. if they don't like you at least they will fear you.)
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To: GeronL

These days, anything is possible.


4 posted on 09/26/2012 7:42:40 PM PDT by DigitalVideoDude (It's amazing what you can accomplish when you don't care who gets the credit. -Ronald Reagan)
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To: GeronL

A Hummus diet would not just weaken me physically, I would need treatment for depression as well.

The projected worldwide bacon shortage is a source of great anxiety, brightened only by the advent of feral porcines here in the midwest.

Perhaps my neighbors and I can run a herd of them off a cliff, and provide bacon to a hungry nation. I believe it’s Scriptural.


5 posted on 09/26/2012 7:44:13 PM PDT by One Name
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To: GeronL

” Something must be done to keep the United States from falling to third world status “ I do believe Watson that we have already arrived at that point.


6 posted on 09/26/2012 7:48:44 PM PDT by American Constitutionalist
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To: DigitalVideoDude; GeronL

These days, anything is possible.
__________________________________

Amen!

Thanks for another, GeronL. We’re are going to need crutches around here because of having our leg pulled so much. :p


7 posted on 09/26/2012 7:49:52 PM PDT by Irenic (The pencil sharpener and Elmer's glue is put away-- we've lost the red wheel barrow)
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To: GeronL
( UN food aid delivered to US schools for America's school children under the forced starvation from the current regime.)

When public school systematic institutionalized commie, liberal, homo indoctrination garbage isn't enough.
8 posted on 09/26/2012 7:53:11 PM PDT by American Constitutionalist
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To: GeronL

Had to double check the source as I was reading. It was immediately clear. Unfortunately there is too much truth in this satire. Makes me weep for my country


9 posted on 09/26/2012 7:56:20 PM PDT by Nifster
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To: American Constitutionalist

It is sad that this government has made it too easy by doing 90% the job for us.


10 posted on 09/26/2012 7:58:45 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL

LOL


11 posted on 09/26/2012 8:01:57 PM PDT by lysie
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To: GeronL

Kids school food protest song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2IB7NDUSBOo&feature=player_embedded#!


12 posted on 09/26/2012 8:02:59 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL

LOL

Almost had me....

Thanx for the ping...


13 posted on 09/26/2012 8:03:47 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously, you won't live through it anyway)
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To: cableguymn

Today’s satire is tomorrow’s headline!


14 posted on 09/26/2012 8:05:38 PM PDT by Jack Hydrazine (It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine!)
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To: GeronL

Hey, when China is still receiving Foreign Aid from the US...it would not really surprise me if the US ended up getting some UN food aid. My cynicism almost got the better of me ‘-)


15 posted on 09/26/2012 8:19:31 PM PDT by SeminoleCounty (Political maturity is realizing that the "R" next to someone's name does not mean "conservative")
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To: One Name

Run into the beltway and fill the porkers with demons first. That would straight up be scriptual.


16 posted on 09/26/2012 8:29:45 PM PDT by L,TOWM (Write in Chuck Norris for POTUS and tell the power brokers to FOAD.)
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To: GeronL

But, as with all corrupt governments, it’s the government fat-cats who will receive the food and distribute it to...themselves.


17 posted on 09/26/2012 8:35:33 PM PDT by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue./Technological progress cannot be legislated.)
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To: the OlLine Rebel

That is very likely, just like North Korea and others.


18 posted on 09/26/2012 8:46:19 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL

You had me going until “Chinese rice.” still a great piece of satire!!


19 posted on 09/26/2012 8:48:02 PM PDT by Kieri (The Conservatrarian)
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To: GeronL

You had me going until “Chinese rice.” still a great piece of satire!!


20 posted on 09/26/2012 8:48:19 PM PDT by Kieri (The Conservatrarian)
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To: Kieri

Thanks. Feel free to move about the old blog posts too


21 posted on 09/26/2012 8:58:07 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: Chode; Toespi; Morgana

bump


22 posted on 09/26/2012 9:08:55 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: American Constitutionalist
” Something must be done to keep the United States from falling to third world status “ I do believe Watson that we have already arrived at that point.

Ah, no. We went to Fiji last month... that is a third world nation. It is truly beautiful, but those people live in conditions that most Americans can't imagine. And Fiji is one of the better-off third world countries.

23 posted on 09/26/2012 9:11:03 PM PDT by exDemMom (Now that I've finally accepted that I'm living a bad hair life, I'm more at peace with the world.)
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To: L,TOWM

Ya, but when the pigs die, they gotta go somewhere else...

Can’t kill them demons, can’t imprison them quite yet..


24 posted on 09/26/2012 9:32:54 PM PDT by One Name
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To: katiedidit1; al baby

bump,

A great blog full of informative articles!

http://asspos.blogspot.com


25 posted on 09/26/2012 9:34:10 PM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL
LOLOLOL...
26 posted on 09/27/2012 4:51:20 AM PDT by Chode (American Hedonist - *DTOM* -ww- NO Pity for the LAZY)
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To: Chode; cotton1706; married21; Skooz; DeadFurrow; Ravi; ScottinVA; Baseballguy; FlingWingFlyer; ...

this is an important story that we need to get out!


27 posted on 09/27/2012 6:52:11 AM PDT by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: GeronL

Satire, yes.. but believable because this damned world is turned upside down.


28 posted on 09/27/2012 6:59:11 AM PDT by ScottinVA (Record high turnout is our hope for sending 0bama home. Pray hard!!!)
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To: GeronL

satire. don’t ping me with this.


29 posted on 09/27/2012 6:59:55 AM PDT by married21 (As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.)
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