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NYC Police Shoot Bystanders
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 14 Dec 2013 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/14/2013 9:31:51 AM PST by John Semmens

Two New York City police officers wounded two pedestrians when they opened fire on an unarmed man who was wandering into traffic.

Assistant District Attorney Shannon Lucey defended the discharge of the weapons saying that “the person the officers were trying to apprehend may have been mentally deranged. He could’ve been hit by a car or bus and been seriously injured or killed. They officers felt justified using deadly force to try to stop him.”

The deranged man was eventually arrested and will be charged with assaulting the two women that the police shot while pursuing him. As Lucey explained, “this man created the situation that caused the police to shoot these women. For that he is criminally liable.”

Lucey dismissed the possibility that firing on a jaywalking suspect might have been an excessive use of force. “If we go down that road it would expose the city to potential tort damages due the victims,” she pointed out. “By lodging charges against the man we arrested we divert any lawsuit by the shooting victims toward him.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2013/12/14/secretary-says-insurers-should-waive-premiums/


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: insanity; liability; police; satire

1 posted on 12/14/2013 9:31:52 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
they actually want to/maybe by now did charge him for their collateral damage saying it was his fault...
2 posted on 12/14/2013 9:36:18 AM PST by Chode (Stand UP and Be Counted, or line up and be numbered - *DTOM* -vvv- NO Pity for the LAZY - 86-44)
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To: John Semmens

Close, very close to the mark


3 posted on 12/14/2013 9:39:14 AM PST by HangnJudge
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To: Chode

Is there traffic cam video of the incident?


4 posted on 12/14/2013 9:42:07 AM PST by Antihero101607
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To: John Semmens
Excellent, John!

Out of curiosity, how many words did you actually change?

5 posted on 12/14/2013 9:44:18 AM PST by Navy Patriot (Join the Democrats, it's not Fascism when WE do it, and the Constitution and law mean what WE say.)
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To: John Semmens

The insane libtard reasoning is or has worked its way into the NYPD.


6 posted on 12/14/2013 9:44:41 AM PST by SgtHooper (If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.)
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To: Navy Patriot

S0, let me get this correct....the Police wanted to use deadly force because they were concerned he might get killed by wandering into traffic?

Yes, yes I see the logic now.

BTW maybe a couple of more hours at the range may be in order for the officers.


7 posted on 12/14/2013 9:46:49 AM PST by Meadow Muffin
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To: John Semmens
Got into the second paragraph and was going to respond. Then I saw it was satire.

Is this art imitating life or life imitating art?

I'm so confused.

8 posted on 12/14/2013 9:48:26 AM PST by mountn man (The Pleasure You Get From Life Is Equal To The Attitude You Put Into It)
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To: John Semmens

Sounds more like Denver or LA than New York.


9 posted on 12/14/2013 9:52:30 AM PST by Cicero (Marcus Tullius)
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To: Antihero101607
i don't know, but i did read an article stating the cops want to charge him for "inciting" the incident
10 posted on 12/14/2013 9:54:19 AM PST by Chode (Stand UP and Be Counted, or line up and be numbered - *DTOM* -vvv- NO Pity for the LAZY - 86-44)
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To: Meadow Muffin
Well, there's a little stealth satire here, that John always stipulates.

Sadly your analysis is very likely accurate, although not proved, and denied by the cops.

It's the standard "we thought we saw a gun".

11 posted on 12/14/2013 9:58:31 AM PST by Navy Patriot (Join the Democrats, it's not Fascism when WE do it, and the Constitution and law mean what WE say.)
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To: John Semmens

Nice John.. you got me....next time I will read the tag line.

My bad....ouch do I feel embarrassed.


12 posted on 12/14/2013 10:03:43 AM PST by Meadow Muffin
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To: John Semmens

Quite a record of bystander shootings by NYPD. That new gun law really helps.


13 posted on 12/14/2013 10:05:58 AM PST by ImJustAnotherOkie (zerogottago)
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To: John Semmens
You mean the NYMPPD?

New York Monte Python Poice Dept.

14 posted on 12/14/2013 10:55:00 AM PST by Lockbox
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To: John Semmens

No worry, NYC has plenty of bystanders!


15 posted on 12/14/2013 11:15:10 AM PST by SWAMPSNIPER (The Second Amendment, a Matter of Fact, Not a Matter of Opinion)
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