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If Kerry wins.... (Vanity)

Posted on 11/01/2004 6:12:16 PM PST by Bones75

Okay now. If Kerry wins tommorow, I am going to quit my job and jump right on the government-handout gravy train. Why should I continue to work to better myself when I can get free money?! Okay, so if Kerry wins, I'll be down about noon on Wednesday so please have my check ready.

Also, in keeping with the spirit, I think I will get married to 'Bruce' from next door. Hey, why not, right?

Also, as an alternative energy source to fossil fuels, I will heat my home by burning American flags, to keep me and the five homeless union workers who's jobs were lost by the Bush economy warm.

I will also wear a UN t-shirt and pin wherever I go, and put a sticker on my (hydrogen powered) car. Because hey, they are really on top of things lately. See, when those thousands of people were being massacred in Sudan, the UN held a meeting to decide wether to have a discussion about whether or not all that killing is a bad thing, in which case they can then discuss whether they should have a vote to meet and discuss a meeting regarding whether or not they should have a discussion about organizing a meeting to decide whether or not to declare *publicaly* that it is bad and impose sanctions. (which the Arab world fears *so* much) So I feel pretty safe and secure about that.

On the other hand, if Bush wins, I'll go into the first elderly person's house I see. Then I'll flush all of her prescription medicine down the toilet and toss the old lady out in the snow barefoot.

[/humor]

Sorry for getting a little nuts here, but I had to blow off a little steam.

Get everbody you can out there folks. I'll be there, will you. Tommorow's the day, don't depend on somebody else. We need every vote we can get.

Go George W!

Bones


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Humor; Miscellaneous; Society
KEYWORDS:

1 posted on 11/01/2004 6:12:18 PM PST by Bones75
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To: Bones75
Hey, now, don't forget the abortion! They're mandatory under Kerry health care, you know. Have at least five.
2 posted on 11/01/2004 6:15:24 PM PST by atomicpossum (If there are two Americas, John Edwards isn't qualified to lead either of them.)
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To: Bones75

If Kerry wins, I think I am going to move to St John's in the US Virgin Islands to avoid his mess.


3 posted on 11/01/2004 6:16:18 PM PST by katdawg
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To: Bones75

"Okay now. If Kerry wins tommorow, I am going to quit my job and jump right on the government-handout gravy train."
.
.
"Then I'll flush all of her prescription medicine down the toilet "


Her prescription medication was probably paid for by Bush's gov't gravy train boondoggle Medicare program.

No disagreement with the rest of your sentiments (see my tagline). I just hope that a lame-duck Bush presidency will see a vast decrease in dumbass gov't handout programs like Medicare and other domestic programs he's increased. I like my conservatives to be of the 'fiscal' variety.


4 posted on 11/01/2004 6:16:32 PM PST by Blzbba (John Kerry is a jackass.)
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LOL is this a joke? Bush lanslide in 24 hours!


5 posted on 11/01/2004 6:16:58 PM PST by VastRWCon
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To: atomicpossum; All

Yep, I forgot about that! I'll have to have a sex change operation to do that, but I know the federal government will pay for that, too, so no worries.

Bones


6 posted on 11/01/2004 6:17:07 PM PST by Bones75
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To: Bones75
Tomorrow we will find out what kind of America we really live in today -

Our mettle is about to be tested as a Nation - We are all about to see "openly" how we respond as a Nation.

I believe we will stand TALL.

And if we don't respond by standing tall with strength I know I will literally have the wind knocked out of my soul for this Country.

7 posted on 11/01/2004 6:17:34 PM PST by SevenMinusOne
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To: VastRWCon

"Bush lanslide in 24 hours!"

I am praying to God you're right!

And yes, my original post was a joke.

Bones


8 posted on 11/01/2004 6:18:17 PM PST by Bones75
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To: atomicpossum

"They're mandatory under Kerry health care,"


Yep! And after one, you can join the military and let us taxpayers pay for a boob job! Over 250 of these have been performed in the military on our dime since 2000!

If John Kerry wins, I'm gonna move to Canada and leech of those idiot Canucks and their socialism. Hell, the drugs are cheaper there and they'll probably have no problems with me wiping my a$$ with a UN flag.


9 posted on 11/01/2004 6:18:59 PM PST by Blzbba (John Kerry is a jackass.)
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To: Blzbba

"they'll probably have no problems with me wiping my a$$ with a UN flag."

I can tell you this, *I* certainly don't have any problem with you doing that. They should make toilet peper with little UN flags on it.

Bones


10 posted on 11/01/2004 6:20:41 PM PST by Bones75
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To: DevSix

" I will literally have the wind knocked out of my soul for this Country."


Naa - it won't be that bad as long as Congress stays GOP. Think about it - a conservative Senate would let Kerry pass NOTHING and appoint NOONE to the SCOTUS.

Now, a President Hillary - that is a different story entirely.


11 posted on 11/01/2004 6:21:09 PM PST by Blzbba (John Kerry is a jackass.)
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To: Bones75

Have a gay marriage and then get a quickie government-funded divorce. Lather, rinse, repeat. Lather, rinse, repeat.


12 posted on 11/01/2004 6:22:10 PM PST by RocketMan1
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To: Blzbba

If Kerry does managed to cheat enough to win, how much would the GOP controlled house and senate help us to neuter him?

(not a rhetorical question, I really don't know)

Bones


13 posted on 11/01/2004 6:22:39 PM PST by Bones75
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To: Blzbba
Naa - it won't be that bad as long as Congress stays GOP. Think about it - a conservative Senate would let Kerry pass NOTHING and appoint NOONE to the SCOTUS.

I'll tell you if this Nation does not stand up TALL - shoulder to shoulder with a good and decent man like George W. Bush our Great Nation has lost its soul.

That is a fact.

If our Nation and this generation of voters turn tail from the hard days ahead via the War on Terrorism - this Great Nation has lost its soul.

Tomorrow we find out what the America of today is made of.

I believe we will be proud. George W. Bush will win reelection.

14 posted on 11/01/2004 6:25:52 PM PST by SevenMinusOne
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To: Bones75

IF KERRY WINS, I GUESS ALEC BALDWIN AND I WILL BE EXCHANGING KEYS. HE WILL COME BACK TO THE GOOD OLE USA AND I WILL GO TO KISS MY ARM, FRANCE. COME TO THINK OF IT DID ALEC REALLY LIVE THE USA OR WAS IT JUST THE BUILDING..NO THAT WAS ELVIS..I'M CONFUSED...


15 posted on 11/01/2004 6:28:01 PM PST by exmoor
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To: Bones75

I'AM CONFUSED I MEANT TO SAY LEAVE... THE USA OR WAS IT JUST THE BUILDING..NO THAT WAS ELVIS..I'M CONFUSED...



16 posted on 11/01/2004 6:29:35 PM PST by exmoor
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To: Bones75

I' AM CONFUSED I MEANT TO SAY **LEAVE** THE USA OR WAS IT JUST THE BUILDING..NO THAT WAS ELVIS..I'M CONFUSED...



17 posted on 11/01/2004 6:32:34 PM PST by exmoor
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To: VastRWCon

Shhh....don't jinx it.


18 posted on 11/01/2004 6:34:32 PM PST by Cosmo (Got wood?)
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To: exmoor

Kerry wins in a squeakier so Bin Laden takes credit like he did in Spain and is emboldened for his next attack then:
1. Terrorists celebrate in the streets and are emboldened,
2. We pull out of Iraq and the Iraqis are left to be overrun by extremists, the torture rooms, rape rooms and mass graves resume,
3. Iran is emboldened and finishes developing its Nukes, as does N. Korea,
4. Taxes are raised on the middle class, small business is hurt and the economy suffers, taxes are raised again to pay for the social programs needed in a failing economy,
5. He names supreme court justices that pass his test and partial birth abortion becomes a constitutional right along with gay marriage and gay adoption.,
6. Michael Moore and the other hollywood morons are pleased with themselves and continue to annoy the rest of us with their political views,
7. Medicine is socialized and health care innovations halt.,
8. Terreza redecorates the white house in Mozambique Mod and tells everyone to "Shove it"
9. Patriot act is repealed and terrorists have free rein, and
10. I go to bed and never emerge.


19 posted on 11/01/2004 7:06:49 PM PST by RecallMoran (The left would RATHER lie)
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To: DevSix

"I believe we will be proud. George W. Bush will win reelection."


I agree and hope so too. Bush will prevail.


20 posted on 11/01/2004 9:10:23 PM PST by Blzbba (John Kerry is a jackass.)
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To: RecallMoran

That sounds like a Hitchcock movie...and you get all the CREDITS...


21 posted on 11/02/2004 10:41:22 AM PST by exmoor
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