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Baldwin Not the Only Culprit in Custody Battle with Basinger
San Diego Union-Tribune ^ | 4/27/07 | Jeffery M. Leving and Glenn Sacks

Posted on 04/27/2007 10:34:04 AM PDT by PercivalWalks

Alec Baldwin’s angry, over-the-top voice-mail tirade at his daughter, Ireland, was clearly wrong. Unfortunately, while we’ve been wringing our hands over how bad Baldwin is, we’re ignoring the case’s central truth – Kim Basinger’s well-documented parental alienation campaign against Baldwin.

Parental alienation often arises after a divorce, as one angry, vengeful parent tries to turn the children against the other parent, destroying the loving bonds the children and the target parent once enjoyed. Baldwin claims that his outburst occurred in the context of Basinger alienating Ireland and trying to drive him out of his daughter’s life.

This claim appears to have merit. In fact, Basinger’s own mother has publicly condemned her behavior. Ann Basinger, Ireland’s grandmother, calls Baldwin a “wonderful” parent, and says:

“My heart is sad for Ireland. She’s the one that’s suffering the most. All this is killing her. I think Kim has tried to alienate Ireland from her father. Alec loves his daughter with all his heart. He really is a family man . . . I hate what [Kim] is doing.”

Journalist Pat Lalama, who has covered the Baldwin-Basinger divorce and custody battle since their break-up seven years ago, recently told CNN:

“In all the years that I have covered celebrities . . . this was one of the meanest exchanges between two human beings . . . some of the things that Kim Basinger was demanding, in order to humiliate him, were outrageous . . . [Baldwin] was provoked by an angry ex, which I’m guessing is probably the case here, [and] he went over the edge.”

Earlier this year Baldwin charged that Basinger has: violated his visitation rights; interfered with his phone access to Ireland; and not notified him when she was going to be out of town so Baldwin could care for Ireland himself rather than leaving her with Basinger’s baby-sitters.

In court Baldwin produced messages that Basinger gave Ireland before Ireland’s visits with Baldwin. The messages, which were printed on candy bar wrappers, implied that Basinger had been mistreated by Baldwin and that Basinger and Ireland are aligned together.

Despite this, Baldwin has made legitimate attempts to placate Basinger in the best interests of their child. In November he even went on “Larry King Live” and praised Basinger, telling King, “I think she’s a great mother, yes, a good mom.”

In the long run, the apparent decision to leak the tape to the media – in violation of a court order – is far more damaging to Ireland than Baldwin’s angry tirade. Had the tape not been leaked, Baldwin would have apologized to Ireland, and the incident would have been soon forgotten. Instead, Ireland will be embarrassed by the incident for the rest of her childhood.

One tactic frequently employed by alienating mothers is to try to provoke the father into blowing his top by interfering with his relationship with his children. When he does, mom pretends to be scared of “his awful temper,” and gets the father’s already limited role in his daughter’s life reduced. Baldwin was foolish to play into Basinger’s hands.

As the target parent of parental alienation, Baldwin is in a very difficult and painful situation. John Stossel, in his new book Myths, Lies and Downright Stupidity: Get Out the Shovel – Why Everything You Know is Wrong, describes an example of parental alienation he filmed for his TV show:

“We videotaped one such heartbreaking scene. A divorced father went to see his five kids for what he thought would be a full-day visit. He was entitled to that, under court order, and the court also ordered the mother not to discourage the children from spending time with their father. But she clearly had poisoned his children’s minds against him. The father just stood outside his ex-wife’s house and begged his children, ‘Would you like to go out with me today?’ ‘No,’ said one kid after another. Then the mother ordered the kids back into her house.

“What comes through on the tape is the unbridled satisfaction of the mother and the helplessness of the father.”

Can any parent reading this honestly say that, were they in this father’s shoes, they would never blow their top?

Jeffery M. Leving is one of America’s most prominent family law attorneys. Glenn Sacks’ columns on men’s and fathers’ issues have appeared in dozens of the largest newspapers in the United States. www.GlennSacks.com


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: alecbaldwin; barfalert; childabuse; excusesexcuses; irelandbaldwin; kimbasinger; parentalalienation; spouseabuse; stalker; wifebeater
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1 posted on 04/27/2007 10:34:12 AM PDT by PercivalWalks
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To: PercivalWalks

Sheeesh !


2 posted on 04/27/2007 10:38:01 AM PDT by GoforBroke
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To: PercivalWalks

at least he didnt’ threaten to stone everybody and their families...


3 posted on 04/27/2007 10:38:23 AM PDT by camle (keep your mind open and somebody will fill it full of something for you)
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To: PercivalWalks

Kim and Alec deserve each other, just get the kid away from them.


4 posted on 04/27/2007 10:38:56 AM PDT by dfwgator (The University of Florida - Still Championship U)
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To: PercivalWalks
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
5 posted on 04/27/2007 10:40:07 AM PDT by stm (Believe 1% of what you hear in the drive-by media and take half of that with a grain of salt)
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To: PercivalWalks

Forget Alec’s politics; this alienation thing is a real phenomenon I’ve seen first-hand, and any mother who would have leaked that tape to the press cares more about spiting her ex than loving her daughter.


6 posted on 04/27/2007 10:41:51 AM PDT by BackInBlack ("The act of defending any of the cardinal virtues has today all the exhilaration of a vice.")
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To: PercivalWalks

Didn’t he physically abuse Kim?

He also made a very clear death threat against Henry Hyde AND hid kids.

The man is a threat and Kim is right to keep him away.


7 posted on 04/27/2007 10:41:54 AM PDT by weegee (Libs want us to learn to live with terrorism, but if a gun is used they want to rewrite the Const.)
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To: PercivalWalks

Oh please! SOrry, but I think all KIM has done is protect her daughter from a verbally abusive ass!


8 posted on 04/27/2007 10:42:32 AM PDT by Halls (check out my profile and it will explain everything!)
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To: PercivalWalks
...One tactic frequently employed by alienating mothers is to try to provoke the father into blowing his top by interfering with his relationship with his children. When he does, mom pretends to be scared of “his awful temper,” and gets the father’s already limited role in his daughter’s life reduced...

BINGO!!

Good article. I know of some of the tactics firsthand, unfortunately.

The truly sad fact of these kinds of battles is the children suffer the most.

An interesting study I read recently shows that the mother is most likely to want to keep the father out of the child's life while the father usually seeks to include the mother in the child's life.

9 posted on 04/27/2007 10:43:29 AM PDT by FReepaholic (If Cho had a nuclear weapon instead of guns, would he have used it?)
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To: PercivalWalks

This is just about exactly what I’d been guessing. Sure Baldwin is a hothead, but Basinger ... anyway. The article said it well.


10 posted on 04/27/2007 10:44:24 AM PDT by pogo101
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To: PercivalWalks
Kim Basinger’s well-documented parental alienation campaign against Baldwin.

he's such a bad-tempered weirdo... i don't blame her... and i certainly don't blame her for outting his vile spewing of words to his daughter in the voicemail...

11 posted on 04/27/2007 10:44:45 AM PDT by latina4dubya
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To: Halls

i agree!


12 posted on 04/27/2007 10:45:37 AM PDT by latina4dubya
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To: PercivalWalks

Let me get this right, because Basinger is a witch it’s okay for Baldwin to call his daughter “a pig”?


13 posted on 04/27/2007 10:45:47 AM PDT by Bob J (nks)
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To: PercivalWalks
Baldwin claims that his outburst occurred in the context of Basinger alienating Ireland and trying to drive him out of his daughter’s life.

Regardless as to how Baldwin's outburst became public it is vary clear that he was addressing his daughter and he is guilty of child abuse. Now days you can arrest a parent for public spanking. If his outburst wasn't a spanking to her psyche, I don't know what is.

14 posted on 04/27/2007 10:46:04 AM PDT by BaylorDad (RE: TTC - Some delays are prudent, others are very costly.)
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To: All

Kim Baldinger may be a bad person, but nothing in the world excuses calling your 12 year old daughter, who didn’t divorce anybody, a pig. Alec Badman has a history of hysterical, hateful, and violent behavior and I’m sure the “publicity” generated by leaking the phone call is the least of the young girl’s problems.


15 posted on 04/27/2007 10:46:52 AM PDT by Maverick68
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To: PercivalWalks
Jeffery M. Leving is one of America’s most prominent family law attorneys.

I've seen this joker's commercials. He's proud that he helped reunite Elian Gonzales with his father.

16 posted on 04/27/2007 10:47:04 AM PDT by Toddsterpatriot (Why are protectionists (and goldbugs) so bad at math?)
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To: PercivalWalks
I have a cousin who makes his living in Chicago defending men's rights in cases like these. He is well known for it in the midwest. This is a sorry subject and an open wound for many. Whatever you may think of Alec Baldwin, some women say and do horrible things to their ex's.

There is no excuse for Basinger to release the recording to the public. None. Alec Baldwin's temper is famous, Basinger's temper is about to be.

17 posted on 04/27/2007 10:47:07 AM PDT by Nachum
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To: PercivalWalks

BS! Kim B is a totally hot babe and A Baldwin is a fat lib pig. Of course he’s the problem.


18 posted on 04/27/2007 10:47:22 AM PDT by Lee'sGhost (Crom! Non-Sequitur = Pee Wee Herman.)
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To: PercivalWalks

The tape was not ‘sealed’ by court order, that appears to be a deliberate misrepresentation.

That said, I feel sorry for the daughter, her parents are both nuts.


19 posted on 04/27/2007 10:48:11 AM PDT by Badeye (Yesterday was pretty good, today is shaping up nicely, and tomorrow anything is possible)
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To: PercivalWalks

This thread is worthless without Kim Basinger pixs.


20 posted on 04/27/2007 10:49:14 AM PDT by Lee'sGhost (Crom! Non-Sequitur = Pee Wee Herman.)
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To: Lee'sGhost

I agree!


21 posted on 04/27/2007 10:51:36 AM PDT by Holicheese (I love shrimp and grits.)
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To: Nachum

A popular tactic in this country is to provoke someone into a verbal fight and then cry “victim!”. It’s unfortunate the kid is caught in the middle.


22 posted on 04/27/2007 10:51:45 AM PDT by F15Eagle (1 John 5:4-5, 1 John 4:15, John 11:25, John 14:6, 1 Tim 2:5, John 3:17-18, John 20:31, 1 John 5:13)
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To: PercivalWalks

Boo, but I just can’t muster up the Hoo.


23 posted on 04/27/2007 10:52:26 AM PDT by NonValueAdded ("The arrogance of ignorance is astounding" NVA 4/22/07)
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To: PercivalWalks
Alec Baldwin has some serious issues to work out before he attempts to take a moral high ground. It isn't the first time he showed his mean streak....This is spin, probably generated by his publisher.


24 posted on 04/27/2007 10:53:49 AM PDT by darkwing104 (Let's get dangerous)
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To: stm

Very creative..I like it !!!


25 posted on 04/27/2007 10:54:14 AM PDT by bestrongbpositive
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To: PercivalWalks

They are both liberals. They shed light on liberal family values.


26 posted on 04/27/2007 10:54:50 AM PDT by Brilliant
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To: PercivalWalks
I recall that Kim has been estranged from her mother for many years, so I wouldn't’t put much credence in what her mother (Ireland’s grandmother) says about this dispute.
27 posted on 04/27/2007 10:56:40 AM PDT by riverdawg
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To: Nachum
Does that excuse him from verbally abusing his daughter ??? If he had said those words to his ex wife, no one would care.
28 posted on 04/27/2007 10:57:49 AM PDT by bestrongbpositive
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To: BaylorDad
Now days you can arrest a parent for public spanking.

Apparently you'll soon be able to arrest a parent for YELLIng at a kid.

29 posted on 04/27/2007 10:58:44 AM PDT by ichabod1 ("Liberals read Karl Marx. Conservatives UNDERSTAND Karl Marx." Ronald Reagan)
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To: PercivalWalks
Bravo!! Kim Basinger is fast becoming the poster girl for mean,vindictive, and manipulative ex-wives. This witch has kept a custody battle going for over five yrs., why haven’t the courts seen through this? She is facing 12 counts of criminal contempt of court, but it is Alec Baldwin who is in the hot seat now because she released this tape.

I’ve already been flamed for defending Baldwin on this custody issue, so don’t even bother. His politics are abhorrent and his acting is terrific, but this is about his only child and he has a God-given right to be her father. Who is to say that he is a bad parent just because he snapped? A few years ago, some working stiff Dad in the UK climbed up a building to protest the way that he was treated in his custody dispute. He was up there for days. This sort of thing would drive any loving parent to madness. Bottom line...the one harming that child is her mother who does not have the emotional maturity to acknowledge that the divorce has nothing to do with her daughter, there is no winner in a divorce. There is comfort for a child if she retains the love and stability of both parents. Kim Basinger should get jail time for what she’s done to that 11 yr. old girl. Alec Baldwin was willing to fly out to LA for one day to “straighten her a@@ out”. She very likely needs it by now.

30 posted on 04/27/2007 10:59:34 AM PDT by ishabibble (ALL AMERICAN INFIDEL)
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To: PercivalWalks
How can I condemn a woman who as it turns out is apparently just as good a judge of character as I am. Well, except for marrying the douchebag, at least.

You may notice that when Baldwin played a mean, cruel, arrogant, controlling, vile father-figure in "Cat in the Hat", he was merely typecast.

31 posted on 04/27/2007 10:59:49 AM PDT by 50sDad (Angels on asteriods are abducting crop circles!)
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To: PercivalWalks

They’re both twits. The girl will be a twit too, no matter which one raises her.


32 posted on 04/27/2007 11:02:52 AM PDT by A_perfect_lady (The only time we should worry about “hearts & minds” is when looking for a place to put bullets.)
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To: PercivalWalks
Both Baldwin and Basinger are nucking futs. The kid will be lucky to grow up normal without many psychological issues. Baldwin and Basinger got where they are by looks and mimicry, not common sense and morals. Neither one are fit to raise Chia pets, much less a kid.
33 posted on 04/27/2007 11:02:59 AM PDT by vetvetdoug
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To: PercivalWalks

At least we have these folks as a fine example of how not to divorce when there are kids involved.


34 posted on 04/27/2007 11:04:49 AM PDT by TheBethsterNH (...in Northern Massachusetts, formerly known as New Hampshire.)
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During their marriage, Kim said he was physically and verbally abusive. Now with this outburst against his daughter, I believe her!


35 posted on 04/27/2007 11:11:57 AM PDT by micho
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To: BackInBlack

i’ve experienced the flip side

my ex alienated our children himself by the physical, emotional and verbal abuse of the children, and by his abuse of their mother (concussion, broken bones)etc.

the children tried to call the police many times

the children are old, don’t want to see him, told the court why, and we have proof of his violent behavior,

yet, he played the alienation card, why, it can’t be his behavior that alienated the children? (the oldest used to sleep with a baseball bat and cell phone, and we had safe house plans, they kids knew what to do if they heard him fly into one of his late night/early morning tirades that lasted for hours)

he told the court, it had to be mom, result: mom (stay-at-home) had to pay for 1/2 of his “therapy” to fix his relationship with the kids, which he promptly stopped after 4 sessions (the psychologist was going to tell the court how abuse he was after observing his sessions with the children and speaking to the children)

this “alienation” phenomena is valid in cases, however, it is being abused.


36 posted on 04/27/2007 11:12:23 AM PDT by machogirl
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To: All

So if my ex is mean I can scream at my kid and call them pigs and it’s understandable? If I am mad at my boss can I yell at my kids too? What about road rage? Can I scream at my kids if I am mad at the guy who cut me off?

Baldwin was pissed at his kid and he gave full vent to his anger. I have NEVER spoken to my kids, or my dog, in such a vitriolic manner.

There is no excuse. I dont care who pisses you off, you don’t scream at your kids or call them names.


37 posted on 04/27/2007 11:13:19 AM PDT by texan75010
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To: FReepaholic

The article describes my ex-wife to a tee. Except mine looked nowhere near as good as Basinger.


38 posted on 04/27/2007 11:13:36 AM PDT by berstbubble
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To: 50sDad

Wasn’t she involved with Prince at one point? ‘Nuff said.


39 posted on 04/27/2007 11:13:52 AM PDT by TNCMAXQ
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To: BackInBlack

I’ve seen it closer to home and its horrible and there is no cure for it except time and maturity.


40 posted on 04/27/2007 11:15:24 AM PDT by tiki
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To: ishabibble

“A few years ago, some working stiff Dad in the UK climbed up a building to protest the way that he was treated in his custody dispute. He was up there for days.
-
_____________________

I remember this guy- he was wearing a Batman outfit. I also abhor that this issue has to be associated with Baldwin and the terrible way he spoke to his daughter but I’ll be happy if this exposes the discrimination against divorced dads that exists in this country.


41 posted on 04/27/2007 11:16:16 AM PDT by berstbubble
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To: bestrongbpositive
Does that excuse him from verbally abusing his daughter ??? If he had said those words to his ex wife, no one would care.

Of course not. Are you going to take away the right to visit his child for it? If so, you might have to take it away from every parent that ever said horrible cross things to their children in anger. The words don't prove he is abusive in any other way, but the release of those words in violation of a court order not to might prove that his wife is worse. Whatever he said to his child in private isn't nearly as damaging as hearing those words repeated on every media outlet and brought up in every conversation about the daughter for the next few decades. Who is abusive here? Is it the mother, or the father?

You have no idea how much abuse and lies I have seen women heap on their ex's. Imagine if it was an average guy without a lot of money to spend on attorneys. It would destroy the man, take away his ability to provide child support, and do horrible things to the relationship of the child to both parents. I have witnessed this also.

Everyone wants to pile on Alec Baldwin. It takes two to tango.

42 posted on 04/27/2007 11:16:44 AM PDT by Nachum
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To: PercivalWalks
Baldwin was foolish to play into Basinger’s hands.

Is that another way of saying he proved her right by his lack of self-control?

43 posted on 04/27/2007 11:17:38 AM PDT by pray4liberty (http://totallyunjust.tripod.com)
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To: PercivalWalks
Alec Baldwin calls Dora the Explorer
44 posted on 04/27/2007 11:20:46 AM PDT by Bommer (Global Warming: The only warming phenomena that occurs in the Summer and ends in the Winter!)
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To: camle

My nephew’s ex is sort of like this description of a woman who alienated the father from the kids. My nephew however, never fell for the bait, although he has been deeply wounded and hurt by his kids seemingly on again off again affection.

The eldest is now in college and the second daughter graduates from HS in June. The eldest moved out of her Mom’s house asap after HS and moved all her stuff into her dad’s home when she went away to college. She was afraid the mom would retaliate and sell all her clothes; ie she realized her mom was not trustworthy.

I think the best thing dads can do in this type of situaion is to continue to always be nice to the kids and try not to bad mouth the mom. My nephew has never missed a school event in his kids lives even though he was often not told about it. He managed to find out from the youngest child, a son, who is atill rather close to his dada as he like to shoot traps and also hunts with his dad in the fall.


45 posted on 04/27/2007 11:22:56 AM PDT by Gumdrop
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To: pray4liberty

OBVIOUSLY, ALEC BALDWIN IS UNABLE TO SEE THINGS CLEARLY!



46 posted on 04/27/2007 11:23:45 AM PDT by Stayfree (*******************Bin Laden's hiding place exposed at CapitolHillComedy.com)
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To: PercivalWalks

“Ireland will be embarrassed by the incident for the rest of her childhood.’

As if being named after a country weren’t burden enough.


47 posted on 04/27/2007 11:23:51 AM PDT by gcruse
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To: PercivalWalks

I’m just happy to know that Fat Alec is miserable!!!


48 posted on 04/27/2007 11:24:35 AM PDT by RPTMS
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To: Gumdrop
I think the best thing dads can do in this type of situaion is to continue to always be nice to the kids and try not to bad mouth the mom.

You're absolutely right about this mature way of handling the matter, but then Alec Baldwin is not the real man your nephew is.

49 posted on 04/27/2007 11:25:59 AM PDT by pray4liberty (http://totallyunjust.tripod.com)
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To: Bob J
No, it is not alright, but when you have been provoked time and time again and you have a temper, you lose it. Kim is playing a psychological game and it is working.

That said, I've heard people call their children worse, I didn't agree with it but nobody rushed in and took the kids away. I'd bet that if we had recordings of every outburst of parents from the beginning of time, that at least one time in the child's life the parent lost it and said things that should have never been said. You should've heard some of the things my mother said to me!!! White trashe comes immediately to mind. LOL A good parent would apologize, mine never did.

50 posted on 04/27/2007 11:30:44 AM PDT by tiki
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