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***The OFFICIAL Weekend Singles Thread*** November 9-11, 2007 - Holidays & Dealing With Loneliness

Posted on 11/09/2007 7:25:47 PM PST by DaveLoneRanger

Welcome to the Singles Thread!

Good evening, everyone! It's hard to believe it, but Thanksgiving is just a couple of weeks away, and after that, we're only six weeks out from Christmas! 2008 is just around the bend, and 2007 will soon become obsolete.

For many of us, the holidays are a time to visit family or friends...when the very air you breathe seems laden with Yuletide cheer.

But with the love and joy we observe in others, for those of us who are single, there is no doubt that there is a slightly bitter edge of loneliness tainting that happiness. There is family love, to be sure. There is Christmas spirit in plenty. But lurking on the edge is that quiet ache for someone to share our innermost self with.

This not being said in the interest of being depressing, of course! It's just a facet of the upcoming holidays that I know I don't look forward to, and one or two others among the group have pointed out. (Tonight's topic is by request, actually.)

So, what are your plans for the holidays? If there are kids in your family, how might you handle their plans? What do you do to handle any loneliness and how would you handle being alone at Christmas, or Thanksgiving or New Years? How do you handle your kids' pain?


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To: WFTR

The Christmas season lasts from Christmas Eve until Ephiphany (Theophany in the Eastern Church, and I assume the Orthodox Church as well), when we celebrate the coming of the wisemen.


41 posted on 11/10/2007 7:20:02 PM PST by RosieCotton ("Anything worth doing is worth doing badly." -- G.K. Chesterton [NaNo Count 18645/50000])
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To: WFTR
In the past I have agreed to join others at their home for holiday meals. Even though they were nice people each time I felt lonely. You know how you can feel lonely in a crowd? I’m like that a lot. I’m ok alone but with a bunch of people in a social situation it does not set well with me. Makes me want to cry and I am not a crier.

By the way I saw a picture of soldiers pouring through the airport either coming home or leaving home. I feel bad for soldiers who have no family or no functional family that is there to be thrilled to greet them or warmly send them off. That has to be a lonesome feeling and you know it surely happens.
42 posted on 11/10/2007 7:27:53 PM PST by A knight without armor
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To: pigsmith
Unfortunately this part occurs year round, not just during the holidays.
I'll second that motion. But since Christmas is generally accepted to enhance the love and overall "good feeling" of life, it stands to reason that it would increase that quiet yearning loneliness also.
I was at my sister's two weeks ago where her in-laws and our mother had all converged for the weekend, I thought it was funny (quite a surprise but still funny) that the M-in-law commented to me out of the blue (and several times too) - "Gosh you sure are looking good! We need to find you a man!"
You should count yourself fortunate to have friends/family that care about you that way. :-) If someone said that to me, I'd ask them if they had anyone particular in mind...and perhaps tell them to let me know if someone crosses their path that they think ideal.
43 posted on 11/10/2007 7:31:12 PM PST by DaveLoneRanger ("Being normal is not necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage.")
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To: WFTR

Once when I was picking up my sister at the mall, I wore a big white wig and beard as a (rather unconvincing) disguise. A couple of kids pointed at me and said “LOOK, SANTA!” I gave a hearty ho-ho-ho, and got a few similar reactions around the mall. I realized that I think I would really enjoy playing Santa sometime. I’d have to pick up some age, weight and a beard to do it right, though...


44 posted on 11/10/2007 7:36:29 PM PST by DaveLoneRanger ("Being normal is not necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage.")
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To: RosieCotton

Yes! The Christ candle, big and white. What were the operating names for the other candles? I think ours are the Prophecy candle (usually associated with songs such as “O Come O Come Emmanuel”) and then the Bethlehem candle, then the Shepherds candle (different color) then the fourth, the Angels, then the Christ candle on Christmas Eve.


45 posted on 11/10/2007 7:53:12 PM PST by DaveLoneRanger ("Being normal is not necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage.")
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To: DaveLoneRanger

The full version of “O Come O Come Emmanuel” has a LOT of verses and is sung throughout Advent, most places I’ve been.

If there are special names for the candles, I don’t know them! The third Sunday of Advent is “Gaudete Sunday”, though, and that’s the rose colored candle. “Gautete” means “rejoice” - because it’s almost Christmas, and because (as I recall!) the antiphons and readings for that Mass center around rejoicing because He is near.


46 posted on 11/10/2007 8:05:47 PM PST by RosieCotton ("Anything worth doing is worth doing badly." -- G.K. Chesterton [NaNo Count 18645/50000])
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To: RosieCotton

There is a religious version of an Advent Calendar in cross stitch in the Maxim crafts catalog this year. I think I also may have seen it in Herrschener’s but can’t find that catalog so will order it from Maxim’s.

If you don’t do cross stitch, maybe you could use the inks that look like stitches. My cousin, who doesn’t do any needlework except an occasional afghan in knit, did a kit in cross stitch using the ink pens instead of thread and honest, from 5’ away, you couldn’t tell it hadn’t been stitched. Just a thought.

I’m going to buy one - and do it in cross stitch.

I agree with you. I’m tired of the Santa, and reindeer and holly versions. I want an Advent calendar that celebrates the real reason for the season!!!


47 posted on 11/10/2007 10:28:13 PM PST by TruthNtegrity (Praying for Tony Snow.)
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To: RosieCotton
The Christmas season lasts from Christmas Eve until Ephiphany ... when we celebrate the coming of the wisemen.

Indeed, my wife would always withhold the Magi from the creche scene until Epiphany. Sometimes she would place them in another part of the room, as if they were on their journey.

48 posted on 11/11/2007 3:14:49 AM PST by LantzALot (Yes, itís my opinion. No, itís not humble.)
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To: DaveLoneRanger
I have to agree with you about the music in the stores. I was shocked to walk in to our local Wally World a week before Halloween and heard the carols being played overhead. It seemed so out of place.

Our family tradition has always been to put up the tree and lights the day after Thanksgiving.....It's something to look forward to and anticipate. On Thanksgiving....after we've stuffed ourselves appropriately....we pile into cars and go scout Christmas lights.

Early Fall is busy around here.... raking leaves, winterizing the garden and yard...etc. Thanksgiving marks the end of those preparations.....and the beginning of winter/Christmas..... in my mind.

With that said.... I hate Christmas shopping crowds.....so I do my shopping online and all year long. I just pick up last minute items to top off the list between the holidays. It gives me time to do what I love best. DECORATE! *chuckle* We have a cookie weekend where the gals/kids come down to bake. Everyone picks their favorites (at least three varieties) and we spend the whole weekend baking and making Christmas ornaments for "Nana's tree". In the evening.... we'll watch Christmas movies, pop corn and string cranberries.

Traditionally on Christmas Eve.....we read the Christmas Story from the Bible.... pray a prayer of thanksgiving before opening gifts and enjoy our hot toddies (kids get hot cider), taking pictures and watching the wide-eyed wonder and giddiness of the children as they open their gifts. I'm VERY thankful my son and DIL are now back in Texas to enjoy all this. So are they. :)

49 posted on 11/11/2007 3:31:24 AM PST by LaineyDee (Don't mess with Texas wimmen!)
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To: A knight without armor
I feel bad for soldiers who have no family or no functional family that is there to be thrilled to greet them or warmly send them off.

Then why not make it your mission to give them a greeting on Christmas Eve? Go to your local VA hospital on Christmas Eve....with goodie bags to pass around to those who have no family and brighten their heart for a day. There are volunteer coordinators who would work with you to find the particular soldiers needing a boost. You could start your own Christmas tradition. It would surely heal your heart and soul by giving away..... what you need yourself. :)

50 posted on 11/11/2007 3:45:39 AM PST by LaineyDee (Don't mess with Texas wimmen!)
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To: LaineyDee

Capital idea!


51 posted on 11/11/2007 8:40:47 AM PST by A knight without armor
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To: DaveLoneRanger
I will be cooking a traditional Thanksgiving dinner for my daughter and myself - and missing my other daughter who's in England and not able to get home. If you're making a turkey for Thanksgiving you don't have the luxury of sleeping in! lol My holiday dinner is limited though because I hate stuffing, sweet potato and squash. I love gravy though so I make tons of that! yum! :^P

And I would be looking for a different job if I was expected to work on Thanksgiving or Christmas! I even usually request Good Friday off.

52 posted on 11/11/2007 9:47:38 AM PST by My hearts in London - Everett (Heaven: preregistration is required!)
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To: pigsmith
I was at my sister's two weeks ago where her in-laws and our mother had all converged for the weekend, I thought it was funny (quite a surprise but still funny) that the M-in-law commented to me out of the blue (and several times too) - "Gosh you sure are looking good! We need to find you a man!"

Yeah, I've been getting it from both my parents and grandparents to hook up with a girl. Actually, I think they're starting to get alarmed that I won't and, truth be told, it's looking more and more like that all the time. Still, I somehow didn't expect to ever hear things like that from them.
53 posted on 11/11/2007 5:05:42 PM PST by JamesP81
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To: 38special; aft_lizard; abishai; A knight without armor; Alberta's Child; Allegra; Amityschild; ...
Sunday Night Singles



Please freepmail DaveLoneRanger to be added / removed




What kind of weather do you anticipate for your Thanksgiving and/or Christmas? Do you prefer snow (like me!) or would you rather have a nice mild Thanksgiving and/or Christmas?
54 posted on 11/11/2007 6:28:14 PM PST by DaveLoneRanger ("Being normal is not necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage.")
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To: JamesP81

Tell them to be on the lookout! As your family, they may be a good group to deploy in your search. :-)


55 posted on 11/11/2007 6:31:29 PM PST by DaveLoneRanger ("Being normal is not necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage.")
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To: DaveLoneRanger

I haven’t seen snow for Christmas since 1999.


56 posted on 11/11/2007 6:33:41 PM PST by darkangel82 (And the band played on....)
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To: LaineyDee

What a great post, full of imagery! It sounds like an old-fashioned Christmas around your place. How lovely.


57 posted on 11/11/2007 6:42:46 PM PST by radiohead (Dissolution of the IRS as we know it - Fred Thompson. Stop...You had me at "dissolution.")
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To: DaveLoneRanger

I like cold weather for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Snow is fine. Not likely though. I bet we will have a very mild holiday season.


58 posted on 11/11/2007 6:51:03 PM PST by A knight without armor
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To: DaveLoneRanger

I doubt we’ll have snow for Thanksgiving although it’s not impossible. Christmas is a bit more likely. I hope for no snow for either holiday since I have to drive to my mom’s and if there is significant snow then I won’t be going. I do not like to drive very far on slick roads and she lives 80-90 miles away.


59 posted on 11/11/2007 7:32:57 PM PST by slugbug
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To: radiohead

Thanks... It’s always alot of fun. I just wish it would snow more than twice in 30 years ...so we could have a White Christmas once in awhile! :)


60 posted on 11/11/2007 7:50:05 PM PST by LaineyDee (Don't mess with Texas wimmen!)
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