Best time I ever had with the tattoo/hardware guy was when I met him at the 4th of July party at my house. He shook my hand and asked how I was. I held onto his hand way too long, looked him in the eye, and said "About half-lit and carrying a weapon".
He washed dishes for the party after the dinner. And I never saw him again.
Heh.... I've warned my daughter to expect that sort of thing from me if she ever brings some unworthy fella home.
When I was fifteen I scared off one of my (divorced) mom's wanna-be boyfriends in similar fashion. I'd watched the guy for a while, and had concluded that he was a no good, conniving con artist.
One evening when my mom was out of earshot, I flat out told him that I didn't think my mom was right for him, and that I was a troubled teenager who liked to play with guns.
Never saw hide nor hair of him again.