Skip to comments.Don't EVER Do This!
Posted on 07/29/2012 5:51:06 PM PDT by Lazamataz
DO NOT EVER DO THIS.
I met a fellow about 7 years ago in the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. He was getting cleaned up; so was I. We became fast friends. Soon, I was helping him out, and he was helping me.
Sometimes I loaned him money -- a lot -- and sometimes he loaned it to me. Once, I loaned him my car for some jobn interviews. Everything went well.
He contacted me recently and asked if I could rent him a car. "Why can't you rent it?" I asked. Well, he had a valid license but not a physical copy of it. Sure, I replied. I can do it.
I rented the car for him from Enterprise. He paid for the whole deal, including the extended insurance (which I demanded he do). Four days pass, the car needs to be returned or re-rented. No problem, he comes with more money and we re-rent it. Four more days pass, and I contact him. No answers. I call him all day. No answers. Now I am getting worried.
I go to where his last address was, and his girlfriend answers (also in the program of recovery) and she says he moved out some time back. She hints he's returned to using. Now I am getting REALLY worried.
I call and call and call. The next day, I go to Enterprise, and they inform me that because he is an unauthorised driver, no coverage will be afforded me under the insurance. I may be 100% civilly liable. They instruct me to report the car stolen. I call Chamblee police, and an officer comes. Police are always suspicious, and this one is too, telling me "my story does not add up" (but it did! It is what happened!) and informing me that I could and would be charged with a FELONY (Theft by Conversion) if the car is not returned by nightfall.
The guy is still not answering. I might be in SERIOUS trouble for being an idiot -- not for truly being a criminal.
The next day he answers, finally. Tells me not to panic, that the car is fine. I tell him HE and I will BOTH be charged with a felony and that we may be already. He shrugs it off ... "No big deal. I've had felonies before."
Yeah, a comment like that, he's definitely using again.
He promises to get the car to me. I wait at home, calling every fifteen minutes. Excuse after excuse on why he's not there yet. Finally, he stops answering again. Oh crap.
A day passes, I'm reaching out to my 12 step friends to locate him. One person saw him in an apartment complex. I stake it out for a while. No luck.
Another day passes. Enterprise calls me, they tell me they haven't issued a warrant yet, but this will be the final day.
So I start thinking like an addict. I was one, I know how they think. The only interest they (used to be me, too) have is their next hit. BINGO. I text him that I will offer him 100's in cash to bring the car back.
Suddenly he calls. He's willing. I tell him to meet me at my place of employment, where there are armed security guards. He pulls in, he's got 2 friends with him. Hmmm. I lure him out of the car by putting the cash on the ground. He gets out, I get in and order the friends out. The dude says, "Aren't you at least going to drive us somewhere?" Hell no. I'm in sight of armed guards right now, this is where they get out. I let them know they need to leave. I wave to the security guards, they wave back. They had no idea what was going on, but the wave convinced the hoodlums to leave.
This was the most terrifying week I have had in a long time. I was certain I was going to be jailed, with little prospect of an immediate bond, and a loss of job, and a felony accusation that my attorney told me was likely to stick.
All because I was too nice, too naive, and just plain stupid.
Don't let anything like this happen to you. I aged about 5 years.
Glad you figured your way out of that one.
The next time you’re feeling kindhearted to a stray cat person (long story behind that appellation), call your friendly neighborhood cynical freedomposter, I’ll set you straight. And it won’t cost a bunch of rental days from Enterprise! Maybe just a lunch and a bubble tea on Buford Highway.
BTW, I just went tonight for the first time to a Szechuan place a few miles north of the Perimeter that was awesome! A good friend’s daughter’s boyfriend is Chinese, one of his family’s favorites. Place was really busy, and maybe 6-8 white people in the place.
Not this particular fellow, no. Maybe it would be a coworker who was secretly using drugs.
And then I wouldn't have known what to do.
I neither regret my past, nor wish to shut the door on it. It proves too useful.
Didn't you learn anything from the first half of the experience?
We can do Szechuan. I need to calm down for a few days first. Hey that’s right! It’s your treat this time! :)
I’ve been to Laz’s office once to pick him up to go to lunch. Without revealing any detail, I don’t think he’ll have any problems there. If he did, I would be *greatly* surprised!
Yeah, I enjoyed talking to you too. I’ve lost all my phone numbers, so we’ll need to exchange them again.
It had nothing to do with co-signing. It had to do with character evaluation. And while trusting no one sounds nice on paper, it makes for a pretty shitty world. So, human beings take risks on their hearts. And learn.
You can only be truly betrayed by one you care about.
ABSOLUTELY no problems to be had at MY office. LOL! Not even if your name is Achmed. PARTICULARLY if your name is Achmed. LOL!
Oh, and that’s exactly why I insisted we to the money-for-car trade there. No issues were likely to unfold on THAT particular plot of land.
I am glad you didn't go the gutter trash way, you have interesting and humorous views on things.
Yes. Not to COSIGN for anyone.
I agree you were getting a lesson here. Perhaps a reminder of the world you left behind and so that you can breathe a sigh of relief it’s no longer your life.
Wasn’t it Mark Twain who said that if you adopt a stray dog and feed it, you’ll have a loyal friend for life? A human in the same situation may end up killing you.
I changed nothing. I can't. But I did humbly ask God to change me.
I wouldn't worry about that - where he'll take you, you don't need roads.
Funny thing, one of our neighbor's was so very nice, great with kids and always wanted to go for a walk.
Harry came to the door and asked my Mother if he could take my sister for a walk but Mom knew she would have to clear it with Dad first. (and told him so)
Not a month later he was arrested for molesting little girls and spent a couple of years in the pen.
He was so lucky he didn't go to the same prison as my father, I have no doubt he never would have made it out alive.
Poor analogy? maybe, but it's all about trust.
I breathe that sigh of relief every day I wake up.
No offense intended, but that’s rubbish. Those 12 step friends sometimes save my life.
First, thank God you made it out of that situation OK.
Second, thank you for sharing your experience.
I know someone who co-signed a loan for someone who couldn’t pay for some needed health care because the person: (a) had other financial priorities that were sort of frivolous, (b) didn’t hold down a steady job, and (c) had declared bankruptcy so was incapable of borrowing money.
The scenario you shared reminded me of the movie Parenthood (1988). It describes (among other things) a situation in which an adult ne’er-do-well son shows up on his elderly Dad’s doorstep with a bastard son from a one-night stand (I guess the mother abandoned the child, or something) and a load of gambling debt over which some shady people were demanding payment. The father said he’d lend his son the money, but on the condition the son had to commit himself to working for his father for a set number of years until it was paid off. The son agreed, the money changed hands, and then the son skipped town — for good.
Of course grandfather ended up raising the grandson.
I bailed a “friend” out once because his girlfriend (they had two kids) called crying that he was in jail for domestic violence and that she takes it all back.
He only threw the phone at me, I love him!
I had known them for many years and should have known better.
I was a fool to get involved.
I never saw them or my money again.
Should we log this one under lesson learned ?
I hafta disagree.
Wising up is not the same as “changing.” Don’t ever become legally responsible for someone else’s actions. Lending money is one thing. Lending your legal entity is another.
That's just great.
Now a balloon animal making clown, 6 strippers, 4 belly dancers, 3 bartenders, a 16 piece orchestra, Hawaiian flame dancers, Elton John and a pony need to find another gig.
Glad you are OK. Quite an experience!
It happens all the time.
Would this person drive 3 hours to give me a ride when I'm stranded?
If I don't know the answer then no, I don't want to rely on them and how could I count on them?
Cynic, yes. I count my real friends on one hand, and that one hand could always be counted on.
Again, that's where my street smarts and former experience come into play. Active addicts have a sixth sense about cops. They would have SMELLED something wrong and peeled back out. Then Laz would have been in jail.
I saw a good film along those lines today
Room For One More (1952)
A family with three children takes in troubled orphans.
Dir: Norman Taurog Cast: Cary Grant , Betsy Drake , Lurene Tuttle .
BW-95 mins, TV-G,
Elton John and a pony !!??!!
I have found that I, too, can count on my hand.
Never seems to have a headache.
Oh, more experience. An addict does not move until the drugs are gone. There is no such thing as a 'holding addict' unless they are on the way back from the dope man.
Been there, done that.
If Jesus is bumming your cigs, tell him to buy his own!
At one point in my life I did trust one. She became addicted to prescription pain killers. She lied to me, spent over a hundred grand on drugs and doctor visits. She betrayed me. She was my wife.
I mean, if you can't trust your wife, who can you trust?
I haven't trusted ANYONE since.
Christ said “Follow Me”, when you accept Christ you accept change but the change is through you and a self examination, It really sucks to be confronted by You and Christ.
That doesn't always work.
For myself I verify BEFORE I trust.
gosh, i’m glad you didn’t end up in jail,Laz.
i think the quality of your posts might have been seriously
hope your catching up on the the sleep you must have lost!
and well played by you there at the end of the ordeal.
"Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company"
Now don't do dat again.
In Bill's Story, he said of the early days at his home, "...there were many failures, and an occasional heartening success." A few years later, their success rate was 50% of all newcomers, and half the remainder after a few slips. In the mid-1980s, I saw that kind of success rate. It seems to run in cycles.
For now, after 27.5 years in the program, I look around the rooms and I see dead people everywhere, with a few heartening exceptions. Those few are why we keep going.
Another wife. One God selects. I keep on trying to pick women, and have discovered that my picker is BROKE.
I haven't trusted ANYONE since.
Please don't close off that hard. I will trust again. I just won't cosign. :)
Slim’s rule #1
You can’t save people from themselves.
Slim’s rule # 2
You can’t change rule # 1.
Slim’s rule # 3
Trust is the condition necessary for betrayal to occur.
Sometimes it sux to be Slim, but that’s the way it is.
Never loan a car or your wife to a friend because he will throw a rod in both of them.I’m glad things worked out well for you.had to be the scare of your life.
I wouldn’t shoot,but the guy would have gotten a systematic beat-down.
Glad everything worked out, but like others said, keep an eye on your back. The “friends” you refused to take somewhere, they know what you look like.
Not trying to make you paranoid, but would rather that than to hear you got hurt.
You worked in The Program. You of all people should know that self-change is nearly impossible. The ONLY change that seems to have any effect is available ONLY at Step 3: Turn our will and our lives over to a power greater than ourselves.
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