Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any deity of order Crocodylia.
Posted on 01/27/2013 12:48:44 PM PST by nickcarraway
Edited on 01/27/2013 1:04:54 PM PST by Admin Moderator. [history]
At least once a day, Robert Mackey and Paul Trucchio would pray to "the alligator god" that a human head, the only evidence of the brutal murder they committed, would be devoured by a reptile in the Everglades, two witnesses told jurors Thursday.
(Excerpt) Read more at articles.sun-sentinel.com ...
Ever heard this one?
I hope this thread doesn’t turn into one of those debates between the Reformed Church of the Alligator God and the other Alligator God denominations.
Hmmmmppf.
Everyone knows you pray to the CROCODILE god to destroy evidence.
Prayed to Sobek?
Now that’s some heavy duty drugs.
Aligator god? Maybe they would have had more success if they prayed to Cthulhu.
Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!
I doubt that will happen.
Everyone knows that the Reformed Church of the Alligator God is far superior to any other Aligator God denomination. There simply is no debate about the matter to be had.
“Everyone knows that the Reformed Church of the Alligator God is far superior to any other Aligator God denomination. There simply is no debate about the matter to be had.”
That’s pure trot!
Everyone knows that the Orthodox Sepulchre of The Grand Alligator God is the only alligator god denomination anyone needs to know about!
Alligator god ping to the Undead Threead.. and may Xagthrath the Grumbling Rug and the Facebood Owrk have mercy on us all.
Exactly. There is no comparison and it sickens me to see foolish people posting about their other "gods".
Is this some sort of neo-Mayan religion? The article didn’t speculate.
I personally have never burned a single candle to any reformed alligator gods. Hummmph. Only the Eastern Orthodox Alligator can guarantee that one gets away with murder.
Pure rubbish. The Orthodox Sepulchre of The Grand Aligator God is full of schismatic heretics and crypto-communist whores. OSTGAG doesn't even accept the Ritual of the Bloody Enderyin.
Alligator god ping to the Undead Threead.. and may Xagthrath the Grumbling Rug and the Facebood Owrk have mercy on us all.
Xagthrath the Grumbling Rug was a gross schismatic heretic and Facebood Owrk was a crypto-communist whore. I rest my case.
I'll stick with M'alga'thad, Grogorinak, and Maschi-Feschito myself, thank you.
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump.
I said, “Don’t do it!”
He said, “Nobody loves me.”
I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?”
He said, “Yes.” I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?”
He said, “A Christian.”
I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?”
He said, “Protestant.”
I said, “Me, too! What franchise?”
He said, “Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?”
He said, “Northern Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative†Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.”
I said, “Die, heretic!”
And I pushed him over.
What about Gethi-nabburath?
Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any deity of order Crocodylia.
You must be an agatorist!
He’s from that offshoot The Monks of the Grinning Gavial.
This is going to be a thread for the ages.
The ages of 13 to 19.
LOL. I’m guilty.
That’s a load of croc!
He doesn’t look like he’s sacrificing her.
Gethi-nabburath’s ideas about the Hmorgh being of Five Prghramarat instead of Four were rather fascinating but ultimately misguided. All the same, given that the Alligator God still saw fit to accept his women heads as a rightful sacrifice, I guess I can’t criticize too harshly.
I love the melody.
Interesting.
Wonder if his ridiculous outfit had anything to do with it.
The Grinning Gavial kept trying to get away from it.
GATOR RAGE BOY SEES MAN IN ALLIGATOR SHOES,
GETS OUTRAGED
Just stay away from the United Church of The Alligator God. Buncha revisionist heretics, you betcha.
Actually, I think it was the large wooden sign with the bell and the chicken tied to it.
"You sacrifice women your way..."
The next time one of you United Church of the Alligator God people has the idea pop into one of your heads to open your mouths, please pause for a moment and don't.
No, really. What you guys worship is demonstrably NOT an Alligator God and is more akin to a Monkey Demon. Monkey Demons are NOT a form of Alligator God, even if they do accept human heads as sacrifices.
United Church of the Alligator God? How dare you suggest I’m a member of the United Church of the Alligator God?! You must be one of those sick Caimanists!
WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?
I'm a proud Caimanist. My pappy was a proud Caiminist and his pappy before him.
What are you, one o' them fancy shirt-wearing Izodites, spreading your anti-Caimanist propanganda?
Now you’ve stepped in it.
Pretty presumptuous of them to pray, if they aren't saved--- which they will never be, since they're predestined to be lost, just like the lady's head was predestined to be found.
On the other hand they couldn't help it, since there's actually no free will.
My most sincere apologies... I read your post in haste. I tend to reverse people’s meaning when I do that.
But yeah, United Church of the Alligator God is a real croc.
PRAY TO YA LATER, GODLY GATOR!
Thanks for the ping, Darks!
This one’s gonna be epic.
Thank you so much for keeping us informed!
” I personally have never burned a single candle to any reformed alligator gods.”
Then you are the one exception at FR : )
“The alligator ate my friend.
He will eat your friend, too.
If only you would understand,
That he is hungry toooooo, but not hungry enough to eat that lady’s head ....”
(From the Orthodox Eastern Alligator Worship songbook)
” (From the Orthodox Eastern Alligator Worship songbook)”
Darn! I thought I had read all the great classics!
Not everyone can be a herpetological liturgical specialist. Some people have to be bankers!
Oh, I suppose.....
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.