"I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people."
Posted on 06/12/2013 11:02:04 AM PDT by nickcarraway
A Gumtree user is offering one person the chance to live in Brighton, rent free – as long as they agree to dress up as a walrus for two hours every day.
The advert on the classifieds website explains that the unnamed seller has chosen to retire in Brighton after leading a ‘long and interesting life’, some of which was spent just off the coast of Alaska with a walrus called Gregory.
The seller goes on to say that he has constructed a ‘realistic walrus costume’, which should fit ‘people of average proportions’ – because he has never had a friendship that matched up to Gregory.
The average price of a house in Brighton might be above £200,000, however in order to live for free any prospective lodger must be prepared to fully embrace the role of a walrus.
‘Whilst in the costume you must be a walrus – there must be no speaking in a human voice, and any communication must entail making utterances in the voice of a walrus,’ the advert states.
The seller advises that recordings of what a walrus sounds like can be found online (see below).
The lodger will also have to ‘catch and eat the fish and crabs that I will occasionally throw to you whilst you are being the walrus’ in order to qualify for a ‘spacious double room and complete run of the house’.
Naturally, the seller wishes to audition all applicants before agreeing to take a chosen candidate.
Metro accepts no responsibility for any humiliation caused by replying to the advert.
Too bad John Lennon already croaked.
I thought he was the egg man?
Some furry would be happy to get this gig. It is furry to the max.
But I already sprung for the eggman costume...
"I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people."
“... no weirdos”
Paul was the walrus.
The walrus was Klein.
Egg Man. Walrus. Both of them doofuses. Especially John.
well, kook ku ka jube...
When I was a kid there was actually a huckster who would come around door-to-door selling eggs and produce from some local farm. He called himself The Egg Man.
Spent my childhood wondering why the Beatles would write a song about him.
“Egg Man. Walrus. Both of them doofuses. Especially John.”
Goo Goo g’Joob all the way to the bank
I only got a bucket.
Coo coo coo choo ....
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