***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

[Lucky9teen]

Ride the Wind Day

When : August 23rd

Ride the Wind Day is a carefree day to soar above the earth. You can catch a ride with the breeze, or float along slowly like a gentle, late summer cloud.

Summer will soon be over. Catching the drift of this day is easy. Just relax, and let the wind carry you away in whatever direction it is blowing. Leave your troubles and worries behind for a spell, as you waft in the air.

Here are some great ways to enjoy Ride the Wind Day :

• Fly in an airplane

• Fly a kite

• Parachute

• Hang glide

• Take a motorcycle ride

• Hope in a sailboat, and go for a ride

• Just kick back and enjoy one of the last days of summer

  ---

  

A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing.

"Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."

As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"

"No!" she shrieked, aghast.

So, he dropped her. As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her.

"Do you screw?" he asked.

"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself. He dropped her, too.

The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor.

"I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.

"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.

[BerryDingle]

Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, with a warning from the Mother Superior not to get even a drop of paint on their habits.

After conferring about this, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint naked.

In the middle of the project, there’s a knock at the door.

“Who is it?” calls one of the nuns.

“Blind man,” replies a voice from the other side of the door.

The two nuns look at each other and shrug, both deciding that no harm can come from letting a blind man into the room.

They open the door..

“Nice boobs,” says the man. “Where do you want the blinds?”

[llevrok]

Her photo brings back memories.

When I was playing high school football (c.1968), our coach called a stance like that “the athletic position”. Ready to hit or be hit.

Cool.

[Liberty Valance]

[red-dawg]

HOW TO KEEP AN IDIOT BUSY.

[Responsibility2nd]

Huh. I was in before the ping (post 2) and I’m in after the ping got pulled (post 9)

I didn’t see anything wrong there. But you might wanna re-ping.

[Liberty Valance]

Jimmy Kimmel and Guillermo in "Blurred Lines" (feat. Robin Thicke)

[IYAS9YAS]

I see what you did there. It only took me ten minutes to figure it out.

[Liberty Valance]

[IYAS9YAS]

My uncle was a truck driver. A couple of years ago, while he was driving Cabbage Hill in eastern OR (over the Blue Mountains on I-84 just east of Pendleton), the winds were blowing bad enough the State Troopers were closing down the pass to trucks. Just as my uncle approached the shut down area, the wind whipped hard enough to topple his truck onto the driver's side, and blow it over from the right lane to the left lane up against the guardrail. The guardrail held, thankfully, otherwise he would have been blown over the edge and down a cliff onto the westbound lanes.

It was blowing so hard, that when he attempted to get out of the cab, the wind ripped the door out of his hands and tore his glasses from his face.

The troopers said it looked like a microburst hit at that point.

[llevrok]

This is like an old time OFST. If you don’t get your ping pulled now and again, it’s not a real OFST!

What?! That doesn’t sound right?

Never mind.

[wyokostur]

Know why it’s windy in Wyoming???

Nebraska sucks

[IM2MAD]

This is for anyone who has ever telephoned for computer assistance.

Mujibar of India was trying to get a job.

The Personnel Manager said, ‘Mujibar,
You have passed all the tests, except one.
It is a simple test of your English language skills
Unless you pass it,you cannot qualify for this job.’

Mujibar said, ‘I am ready.’

The manager said,
You must make a sentence using the words
Yellow, Pink, and Green.’

Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said,
‘Mister manager, I am ready.’

The manager said, ‘Go ahead.’

Mujibar said,
‘The telephone goes green, green,
And I pink it up, and say,
Yellow, this is Mujibar.’

Mujibar now works at a call center

[Liberty Valance]

[absolootezer0]

top 35 and still IBTP?

[Pan_Yan]

“I didn’t see anything wrong there.”

The balloon was a ... um ... not a balloon. One of the members of the local morality police must have reported it.

[BenLurkin]

[jmcenanly]

when I saw it, all I could think of was this

[llevrok]

That was a great one, Lucky. Gosh we could use Ronnie’s leadership again! And humor!

One of my favorite Reagan stories is about when he was having a matter of difference with Desmond Tutu. The differences were being fanned by the press and was getting ugly. So Mr Reagan thought it was time to have a face to face with the Reverend and clear the air.

Afterwards, while running between appointments, the press shouted as he hurried by, “How’d your meeting with Reverend Tutu go???”

Always quick on his feet, Reagan replied : “My meeting with Tutu? So so.”

[BenLurkin]

[BenLurkin]