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NFL Schedule - 2014 [Live Thread Week 5]
ESPN NFL ^ | ESPN

Posted on 10/01/2014 6:34:33 AM PDT by Bender2

Week 5

Bye teams: Miami Dolphins, Oakland Raiders

Thursday, Oct. 2

Minnesota Vikings vs. Green Bay Packers, 8:25 p.m.

Sunday, Oct. 5

Chicago Bears vs. Carolina Panthers, 1 p.m.

Cleveland Browns vs. Tennessee Titans, 1 p.m.

St. Louis Rams vs. Philadelphia Eagles, 1 p.m.

Atlanta Falcons vs. New York Giants, 1 p.m.

Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Jacksonville Jaguars, 1 p.m.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. New Orleans Saints, 1 p.m.

Houston Texans vs. Dallas Cowboys, 1 p.m.

Buffalo Bills vs. Detroit Lions, 1 p.m.

Baltimore Ravens vs. Indianapolis Colts, 1 p.m.

Arizona Cardinals vs. Denver Broncos, 4:05 p.m.

Kansas City Chiefs vs. San Francisco 49ers, 4:25 p.m.

New York Jets vs. San Diego Chargers, 4:25 p.m.

Cincinnati Bengals vs. New England Patriots, 8:30 p.m.

Monday, Oct. 6

Seattle Seahawks vs. Washington Redskins, 8:30 p.m.

(Excerpt) Read more at espn.go.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Sports
KEYWORDS: football; nfl
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Week 5

Gadzooks-- Only two Gay & Bye-sexual Teams this week: Da Phins and Seven's Waiders... Guess that London trip wore them out.

Thursday night we find out if the Viqueens' 'Bridge over troubled Waters' spans that Green Bay. Sorry, Norspersons, big's Pack comes through--

Sunday Da Bears throw a rod in Cam's shaft--

The New Brownstains beat Allegra's Old Earlers with Johnny Football... scoring on a razzle-dazzle, center eligible play--

Gadzooks, I hate the Iggles but they beat the Yews--

Them Georgia Black Byrds help out my Boys by pecking them Jersey Jints to death--

The Jags step in Stooler as Semi-Big Ben pulls out a win--

The 'Aints bounce back, stealing a squeaker from those Tampa Pie-Rates

The Loins have a feat on roasted rusty Orton rumproast--

Crab City's Black Byrds get hoof and mouth badly up in Indy--

Manning Heavy teaches them Arid Zonaites something about the price of byrd feed--

I'm going out on a limb but I think my Old Dallas Texans will stick it to the 9ers-- Pun... intended!

Them Jersey Jets find the drought continues as they find no cool water to wash Coach Rex's wife's feet with when they gather at the Rivers in Diego--

Sorry, big, no rest for the wicked as big & Bill's Patty Cakers get mauled by TCU North's Bengals--

Monday Night the Seahags pay their repects... with graveside services for the Deadskins

Gadzooks, Allegra! Where, oh where are you? Your Texicans come callin' to JerryWorld and... my Boys go to 4-1 by beating your South Loop Lads silver and blue--

1 posted on 10/01/2014 6:34:33 AM PDT by Bender2
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To: big'ol_freeper; shove_it; TrueKnightGalahad; Larry Lucido; Diplomat; RockinRight; Army Air Corps; ..
Y'all want fries... them picks?
2 posted on 10/01/2014 6:35:06 AM PDT by Bender2 ("I've got a twisted sense of humor, and everything amuses me." RAH Beyond this Horizon)
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To: Bender2

I say Chargers/Cardinals in Super Bowl.


3 posted on 10/01/2014 6:52:01 AM PDT by Right Brother
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To: Bender2

Thanks


4 posted on 10/01/2014 6:59:33 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel (Catastrophic Anthropogenic Climate Alteration: The acronym explains the science.)
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To: Bender2; big'ol_freeper; Impy; Perdogg; SevenofNine

Last week was my best week. Why? I picked against who I really wanted to. Here I go again:

GB
CHI
CLE
PHI
NYG
NO
DAL
DET
BAL
PIT
DEN
SF
SD
CIN
SEA


5 posted on 10/01/2014 7:28:07 AM PDT by GOPsterinMA (I'm with Steve McQueen: I live my life for myself and answer to nobody.)
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To: Bender2

Well, my Colts have lost two close games to very good teams (Denver and Philly) and blown out two below average teams (Ten. and Jacksonville). This week’s game against the above average Ravens should give us a good idea of where we are really at. I predict the Colts by 6. Believe in the shoe.


6 posted on 10/01/2014 7:43:54 AM PDT by circlecity
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel
Re: Tha... nks

Gadzooks, Clet! I am a Bot of my word... you know--

7 posted on 10/01/2014 8:01:35 AM PDT by Bender2 ("I've got a twisted sense of humor, and everything amuses me." RAH Beyond this Horizon)
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To: Right Brother
Re: I say Chargers/Cardinals in Super Bowl

Gadzooks, Right? How much... have you had to drink?

I'd say, Bendy, old Right there... hasn't had enough for a true Delta Tau Chi "Brother."

Now, I think I haven't had... enough to drink!!!

8 posted on 10/01/2014 8:08:24 AM PDT by Bender2 ("I've got a twisted sense of humor, and everything amuses me." RAH Beyond this Horizon)
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To: Bender2

Philip Rivers is on fire. Hottest QB in the game right now. The defense is playing well. If they get the running game going (Mathews returns in 3 weeks) and get the OL healthy, look out!


9 posted on 10/01/2014 8:14:21 AM PDT by Right Brother
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To: circlecity
Re: I predict the Colts by 6. Believe in the shoe.

I agree cir... Ravens get horseshoe dents in their tiny black byrd heads--

I didn't believe in... the shoe!!!!

10 posted on 10/01/2014 8:28:37 AM PDT by Bender2 ("I've got a twisted sense of humor, and everything amuses me." RAH Beyond this Horizon)
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To: Bender2
Of course!

I still look at Korton's historical record v. my Loins is something to consider...he kicks their a$$ as a replacement or "off-the-bencher".
Again, I think that Buffy's Bills

considered the timing of putting Korten in this week.

Buffy's Bills by 10.

11 posted on 10/01/2014 8:33:52 AM PDT by Cletus.D.Yokel (Catastrophic Anthropogenic Climate Alteration: The acronym explains the science.)
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To: Bender2

Hey Bender there is possiblty the Raiders talking get this former coach Joe “Chucky” Gruden


12 posted on 10/01/2014 12:35:51 PM PDT by SevenofNine (We are Freepers, all your media bases belong to us ,resistance is futile)
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To: Bender2

I seeing Seattle

I think H Town give your Jerry Cowpokes bad time SORRY Bender it is true honey


13 posted on 10/01/2014 12:36:36 PM PDT by SevenofNine (We are Freepers, all your media bases belong to us ,resistance is futile)
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To: Bender2
Taking a break from vacating....

The Packers will use the Vicekings to tune up for week 6
The Punters will sneak by the Bearlies
The Brownsquirts will kneecap the Tighthens
The Looneybirds will slam the Ram
The Midgets will pluck the Dirty Birds
The Stools will stride by the Jagwursts
The Ain'ts will shred the Jolly Rogers
Sorry Bend, but Tony always follows a great game with a D'oh...Allegra's Texicans will frustrate Jerry's School for Boys
The Kitties keep it rolling against the Beefaloes
The Folds will stuff the Purple Parakeets
The Mules will make skeet of the Buzzards
The Faggy-niners will tear down Bender's old Dallas Texans' teepees
The Charredburgers will sear the Cessnas
The Patriots will bag the Striped Kitties
Und
The Seaslugs will peal the Redspuds


14 posted on 10/01/2014 6:45:47 PM PDT by big'ol_freeper ("Evil is powerless if the good are unafraid" ~ Ronald Wilson Reagan)
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To: Bender2
Well, here goes. After a 6 - 7 week last time out, what have a I got to lose?

Week 5

Bye teams: Miami Dolphins, Oakland Raiders

Thursday, Oct. 2

Minnesota Vikings vs. Green Bay Packers, 8:25 p.m. Packers seem to have righted things last week. Even though the Vi-Queens showed some life too, I like The Pack at Lambeau Field. Packers.

Sunday, Oct. 5

Chicago Bears vs. Carolina Panthers, 1 p.m. A must-win for both of these wildly inconsistent squads. But I like the Carolina D against Cutler and Company. Panthers.

Cleveland Browns vs. Tennessee Titans, 1 p.m. Browns have shown some life... Almost beat my Ravens and did beat the Saints (who hasn't?). Still, I like Tennessee. Titans.

St. Louis Rams vs. Philadelphia Eagles, 1 p.m. Eagles fly high again after that loss against SF. Eagles.

Atlanta Falcons vs. New York Giants, 1 p.m. Falcons suffered CFIT against Minnesota, G-Men thumped the Pototmac River Basin Indigenous Peoples. G-Men continue their rise from the dead. Giants.

Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Jacksonville Jaguars, 1 p.m. Steelers get healthy against the Jags(who doesn't?). Men of Steel.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. New Orleans Saints, 1 p.m. Saints are glad when the Bucs come marching in. New Orleans wins.

Houston Texans vs. Dallas Cowboys, 1 p.m. Bendy's 'Boys continue their hot streak. Cowboys.

Buffalo Bills vs. Detroit Lions, 1 p.m. E.J. Manuel's benching (Kyle Orton. Kyle Orton???) won't help the Bills against Stafford and Johnson. Lions.

Baltimore Ravens vs. Indianapolis Colts, 1 p.m. A good test for the Ravens, on the road against Indy. They pass! Ravens.

Arizona Cardinals vs. Denver Broncos, 4:05 p.m. Cardinals fall from the ranks of the unbeaten. Broncos.

Kansas City Chiefs vs. San Francisco 49ers, 4:25 p.m. Niners have serious problems despite beating Philly last week. Chiefs looked great against NE Monday. Kansas City in the upset!

New York Jets vs. San Diego Chargers, 4:25 p.m. Philip Rivers versus Gino Smith. Rivers is on track for a career season and I like the Chargers to make the Super Bowl. Chargers take down the Jets and Rex Ryan's seat gets even hotter. BOLTS BOLTS BOLTS!

Cincinnati Bengals vs. New England Patriots, 8:30 p.m. Can Tom and the Pats rebound from that shellacking they took Monday night? Turn their season around (even though it's only Week 5)? By midnight Sunday we'll have an answer and the Pats will be 2 - 3. Bengals!

Monday, Oct. 6

Seattle Seahawks vs. Washington Redskins, 8:30 p.m. The Seahawks are gonna beat Washington like a rented mule! Seahawks!

15 posted on 10/02/2014 12:30:32 AM PDT by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: Bender2; GOPsterinMA; big'ol_freeper; Rummyfan; eldoradude

“Gay and Bye-sexual Teams this week: Da Phins and Seven’s Waiders...”

Bye-sexual, that’s good.

The Packers cut the like Viqueens into uniformly sized cubes, pack them, and ship them

Fig Newton is no Aaron Rodgers, Bears continue being road warriors.

In Africa, the African or Cape Buffalo are preyed on by Lions. Detriot is sorta like Africa, so that’s what’s gonna happen. Kyle Orton? Bison burger.

“Texans” is a pretty lame name for franchise if you ask me. According to wikipedia the other choices were the Bobcats, (Italian?) Stallions, Toros, and Apollo(Creed?)s. How about the “Clowns”, after the people that narrowed it down to those names? Anyway, prediction, COWBOYS.

The Ain’ts ain’t very good, and Lovie’s Barbary coast *itchboys got off the snide and beat the fighting Rapeslethbergs last week. But the Ain’ts will win, big and easily.

Atlanta got their wings clipped last week on the road in Minny, and the Giants remembered you’re supposed to throw/hand off the ball to someone wearing the SAME color jersey as you, and crushed the WASHINGTON FOOTBALL CLUB for their 2nd straight win. Tough call, the Giants win and will have a winning record for exactly one week, enjoy it NY.

Horses and Crows, another tough call. My gut says Baltimore, I’ll go against it, Indy at home.

Eagles beat the Rams, watch baseball St. Louis, baseball.

“Player’s coach” Mike Tomlin and the chocolate chip on his shoulder keep lowly Jacksonville winless.

The Titans strike oil in Cleveland.

Peyton Manning uncerimousiously knocks my erstwhile Chicago Cardinals from the ranks of the unbeaten

The 747’s suffer massive electrical failure in San Diego

The San Fran Californians defeat the Kansas City Missourians

Part of me wants to say the Patriots will bounce back and win at home over a good team, another part of me kicked that part of me in the nads and told it to shut up because the Pats are cooked, they’ll win the East sure, but by default this year. Bengals win.

And finally on Monday Night (2nd anniversary of my 29th birthday) the Super Sonics annihilate the WASHINGTON FOOTBALL CLUB

GB
CHI
DET
DAL
NOLA
NYG
IND
PHI
PIT
TEN
DEN
SD
SF
CIN
SEA


16 posted on 10/02/2014 7:32:58 AM PDT by Impy (Voting democrat out of spite? Then you are America's enemy, like every other rat voter.)
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To: Right Brother; GOPsterinMA

That’s GOPster’s prediction too, IIRC.


17 posted on 10/02/2014 7:35:55 AM PDT by Impy (Voting democrat out of spite? Then you are America's enemy, like every other rat voter.)
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To: Impy; Right Brother

Yes it is. With SD winning. Now if this were to come true, I’d go with ARZ:

http://www.boston.com/sports/columnists/wilbur/2014/10/_if_forced_to_lay.html?p1=Topofpage:Carousel_sub_headline


18 posted on 10/02/2014 8:15:51 AM PDT by GOPsterinMA (I'm with Steve McQueen: I live my life for myself and answer to nobody.)
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To: big'ol_freeper; shove_it; TrueKnightGalahad; Larry Lucido; Diplomat; RockinRight; Army Air Corps; ..
Here are my college picks... for this week:

My Number 6 Aggies will beat Number 12 Mississippi State

Number 7 Baylor will be Texas Strong in Austin and my Old Cuz Larry's Teasips will not--

My upsets predictions are:

1) Number 3 Bama getting rolled by Number 11 Ole Miss--

2) And Number 25 TCU will knock the Sooner out of Number 4 Oklahoma

19 posted on 10/02/2014 2:09:52 PM PDT by Bender2 ("I've got a twisted sense of humor, and everything amuses me." RAH Beyond this Horizon)
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To: Bender2
Here's to a Packer victory!!!
20 posted on 10/02/2014 4:17:33 PM PDT by big'ol_freeper ("Evil is powerless if the good are unafraid" ~ Ronald Wilson Reagan)
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