Posted on 12/12/2017 9:30:01 AM PST by JockoManning
Erma Gawd You are doooo very ignorant
You are beyond ridiculous. Do not bother to respond
I'll try. I'll certainly treat this as a genuine question vs a contrarian slap. LOL.
You say both of your children have significant RAD - which you define as obvious and chronic problems in virtually all relationships - and yet both of your children are each doing amazingly well in both their business and personal relationships...
They appear to be managing their work relationships tolerably well--at least above average for those with significant RAD. They appear to be managing their marriages less well--particularly in the case of my daughter. And my son is gone a LOT of the time traveling for business. Yet, his marriage does appear reasonably solid. There are things that are less than ideal from my perspective--and evidence of RAD. Yet, they are above average for those with significant RAD.
Are your children simply outside of the norm for the population and the disorder that your theory is attempting to explain or are there other causes for this affliction?
I think they are above average for those afflicted with significant RAD in several respects that are difficult to articulate well. In others, they seem to be somewhat average for those afflicted with significant RAD.
They still relate to me more awkwardly than I would like, by far. And, to me, their relationship dynamics with me reflect more the historic RAD carp in the rearing years vs the overwhelmingly healthier ways I've related to them as an adult.
I always tried to respect their individuality and need for space and privacy. However, I know just my way of being in the world those years was a lot dysfunctional and emotionally intense in less than constructive, relaxed, confident ways.
Nevertheless, they knew and would say so now, that they always knew growing up that I'd move heaven and earth in their behalf if I saw the need to do so.
So, it's a mixed bag. In some respects, they are typical relatively high achievers with a lot of the RAD fostered compulsiveness encouraging that to buttress their sense of self worth etc. etc. etc. In other respects, they are still wrestling with intimacy issues, independence issues, connectedness issues, vulnerability issues--the stuff Brene Brown's research is smack in the middle of.
If I've failed to give you the sort of answer you were looking for, please let me know and I'll try again. Cheers.
NOPE. That's what the research has PROVEN. Maybe I need to explain the research better. I realize that some folks are disinclined to accept facts or the truth. Though I have this funny notion that folks do better at least UNDERSTANDING the facts before rejecting them out of hand.
How the Brain Processes Alcohol
http://individualandfamilypsychotherapy.com/2011/02/how-the-brain-processes-alcohol/
BEGIN QUOTE (emphases added):
By Carol Ann Worthing, Phd on | Comments Off ‘Did You Know’ the brain of a non alcoholic processes alcohol differently than in the brain of the alcoholic?
In a non alcoholic brain, Alcohol, after it is ingested, is broken down by the liver into a very toxic substance, Acetaldehyde. Acetaldehyde then breaks down into Acetic Acid and is blown off by the lungs as Carbon dioxide and is eliminated by the kidneys as Water. A small percent is also eliminated in perspiration.
In the brain of the alcoholic, the breakdown of Acetaldehyde into Acetic Acid is performed at half the normal rate resulting in a buildup of Acetaldehyde in the liver, heart muscle, and brain. When Acetaldehyde flows through the brain, the large amounts of Acetaldehyde interact with the neurotransmitter, Dopamine, and forms THIQ, Tetrahydroisoquinoline. THIQ is a morphine like substance found only in the brain of an alcoholic. It is THIQ that can trigger the alcoholic’s need for more and more alcohol to counter the painful effects of the progressive buildup of Acetaldehyde.
This explanation from the film, THIQ by Dr. Ohlem, M.D. is simplified, yet it outlines the importance of some of the physiological aspects of the disease of alcoholism.
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Alcoholism: What People Don’t Get
http://rorygilbert.com/alcoholism-what-people-dont-get/
BEGIN QUOTE (emphases added as well as reparagraphing for easier reading):
Alcoholism wreaks more havoc on individuals and families than any other problem that I see in my practice. Insidious and baffling are words that are often used to describe it, and these words could not be more apropos. Sometimes the effects of alcoholism and drug addiction are obvious, as in the case of the wino who has given up on any pretense of self-respect. Other times the effects of alcoholism are far less obvious, as in the case of the pillar of the community whose shame is a private affair known only (but denied) to the alcoholic and his or her family.
Despite the adverse effects that alcoholism has on people’s lives and its prevalence (there are the same number of alcoholics as there are left-handed people) most people, and I’m including mental health professionals, don’t have a clear understanding of what it is. It is usually equated with nothing more than a drinking problem when {Not the shrinks my housemate knows who were trained in his program and not him}, in fact, alcoholism is a complex disease.
This does not mean that the public is not more educated about alcohol abuse than when I received my training. Anti-drunk driving programs, the advent of rehabilitations centers, the notion of “responsible drinking,” the notoriety of celebrities with alcohol and drug problems, to name just a few relatively recent developments, have raised the public’s awareness of the significance of the problems associated with excessive drinking. More and more people today realize that old myths, such as “alcoholics need to drink every day,” “alcoholics have weak moral character,” and “alcoholics can’t hold a job,” are simply not true.
. . . Rather, the confusion about alcoholism results from a lack of understanding of what alcoholics experience when they do not have alcohol in their systems. Non-recovering alcoholics may seem cool, calm, and collected on the outside when they are sober, but they are feeling anything but that on the inside. {this underlined emphasis was bolded in the original}: They may be able to wear a façade that hides what they are feeling from public view or they may be able to find a way to distract themselves from paying attention to their feelings, but non-recovering alcoholics are in a constant state of emotional distress when they are sober.
An appreciation of the concept of alcoholism as a disease is necessary to comprehend fully what an alcoholic experiences when he or she is not drinking. Alcoholics process alcohol differently than social drinkers do. When social drinkers take a drink, the liver produces enzymes that break the alcohol down into a substance that gets into the bloodstream and works its way to the brain. Once the broken down alcohol reaches the central nervous system, it enters brain cells and slows down the activity of those cells, which social drinkers experience as a nice pleasant buzz. After an hour the alcohol leaves the brain cells and is discharged by the body, and to a greater or lesser degree, the brain cells are the same as they were prior to the social drinkers having had the drink.
When alcoholics take a drink, their livers produce a different set of enzymes than social drinkers. These enzymes break the alcohol down into a substance that is stronger and more toxic than its counterpart in the social drinkers. This stronger substance gets into the bloodstream and, just like with social drinkers, it works its way to the brain where it enters the brain cells. Once inside the brain cells the same basic process occurs in alcoholics as it does in social drinkers–that is, the brain cell activity slows down–but the strength and toxicity of the substance causes the alcoholics to have a much more intense experience. Alcoholics find being under the influence to be far more pleasurable than the nice pleasant buzz experienced by social drinkers.
. . .
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Do Alcoholics metabolize alcohol differently?
http://upfromdown.info/apps/blog/entries/show/10184462-do-alcoholics-metabolize-alcohol-differently-
BEGIN QUOTE {emphases added}:
. . .
2) Secondly, the idea that "Alcholics" metabolize alcohol differently that other people is an urban legend. I challenge anybody to post definitive proof of this. Herbert Fingarette, a distinguished professor at the University of California and the author of "Heavy Drinking: the myth of Alcoholism as a disease" reviews the theories that some peoples bodies respond to alcohol in an abnormal way that "causes" them to become alcoholics. The current scientific evidence does not support these "metabolic hypotheses". See page 55 of his book for more details. It is worth reading .
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{Getting sleepy so will stop here, for now.}
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