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Mount Sterling prepares for testicle festival
St. Louis Post-Dispatch ^ | 6/16/05 | Rick Pierce

Posted on 06/21/2005 12:00:56 PM PDT by byset

Euphemisms abound for the, uh, delicacy that will be the focus of a festival Saturday in Mount Sterling, Ill., about 90 miles north of St. Louis.

Kevin Huston, who owns the Sportsman's Club bar, which is hosting the festival, has heard 'em all: cowboy caviar, swinging beef, mountain oysters, lamb fries. But folks in Mount Sterling (population 2,077) don't mince words, so the festival is known simply as the Sportsman's Club Testicle Festival.

"They're not really like chicken or a beef steak," Huston says. "They're in a class of their own."

The festival, which will feature beef, pork, lamb and turkey testicles, even has a motto: "Come one, come all, let's have a ball." ...

(Excerpt) Read more at stltoday.com ...


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: balls; ballsack; balzak; bustanut; deesenuts; ewwwww; nuts; perversion; testicle; testival
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"tastes like a chicken testicle"
1 posted on 06/21/2005 12:00:56 PM PDT by byset
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To: byset

I have one word for this event: Nuts!


2 posted on 06/21/2005 12:02:04 PM PDT by My2Cents
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To: byset

Think they should invite the Republican caucus of the Senate to this?


3 posted on 06/21/2005 12:02:40 PM PDT by My2Cents
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To: 3rdcanyon; 75thOVI; albee; Amityschild; andie74; Andy'smom; annyokie; Augustus McCrae; Bassfire; ...

No amateurs, please.
Send FReepmail if you want on/off ISHP list
The List of Ping Lists

Y'all go and have a ball.

4 posted on 06/21/2005 12:03:41 PM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: byset

You must have gone nuts to post this!


5 posted on 06/21/2005 12:04:36 PM PDT by L,TOWM (Liberals, The Other White Meat [Born in California, Texan by the Grace of God.])
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To: byset
Two guys walking down the street come across a dog licking it's own nuts. The first guy sighs and says "Wish I could do that". Second guy says "Maybe you should pet him first, eh?"

<rimshot>

Thank you I'll be here all week.
6 posted on 06/21/2005 12:06:02 PM PDT by Spruce
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To: L,TOWM

Balls said the Queen...if I had them I'd be King.


7 posted on 06/21/2005 12:06:24 PM PDT by brooklyn dave (Bring Down the Mullahcracy in Iran)
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To: My2Cents
Think they should invite the Republican caucus of the Senate to this?

They are definitely lacking - people would starve. OH, you mean as guests. Well, in that case, maybe they can find what they are missing.

8 posted on 06/21/2005 12:07:35 PM PDT by Fierce Allegiance (This is not your granddaddy's America)
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To: byset
Testicle Festival, huh?

Will Michael Jackson be performing?

9 posted on 06/21/2005 12:08:32 PM PDT by Freebird Forever (Imagine if islam controlled the internet.)
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To: My2Cents

Why they lost theirs and cooked ones won't help them anyway.


10 posted on 06/21/2005 12:09:27 PM PDT by handy old one (It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. Aristotle)
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To: byset

I see there's also going to be a drag queen contest (in a SMALL TOWN IN CENTRAL ILLINOIS???), but I can understand how this would be in line with the theme of the day.


11 posted on 06/21/2005 12:09:35 PM PDT by Southside_Chicago_Republican (Responsibility is the culmination and fulfillment of freedom)
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To: Junior

Sounds like they've gone balls to the wall for this event.


12 posted on 06/21/2005 12:10:39 PM PDT by cjshapi
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To: Spruce

oh my


13 posted on 06/21/2005 12:12:20 PM PDT by cvq3842
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To: brooklyn dave

I'm pretty sure this sure this article should'nt be in "Breaking" news.

Unless, of course, its breaking hard...


14 posted on 06/21/2005 12:12:23 PM PDT by L,TOWM (Liberals, The Other White Meat [Born in California, Texan by the Grace of God.])
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To: cjshapi

dingaling ping.


15 posted on 06/21/2005 12:14:57 PM PDT by Junior (“Even if you are one-in-a-million, there are still 6,000 others just like you.”)
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To: cjshapi

I wonder if you can get a sack to go?


16 posted on 06/21/2005 12:16:14 PM PDT by Junior (“Even if you are one-in-a-million, there are still 6,000 others just like you.”)
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To: byset; Dashing Dasher; najida; missyme; teenyelliott; pissant; thag
Testicles they're not just for breakfast anymore!!
17 posted on 06/21/2005 12:16:44 PM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: Junior

Yer killin me!

Wonder if this is where the extra parts ended up when they castrated mom's horse?


18 posted on 06/21/2005 12:18:38 PM PDT by cjshapi
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To: Freebird Forever
"Will Michael Jackson be performing?"

No, the theme song is AC/DC's "Big Balls", duh!!

19 posted on 06/21/2005 12:19:10 PM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick

I'm a girl, and this thread is making even ME hurt (eessh)


20 posted on 06/21/2005 12:19:45 PM PDT by najida (I was raised by a pack of rabid hyenas.)
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To: byset

Are the Senate Republicans going to show up?


21 posted on 06/21/2005 12:19:45 PM PDT by Mamzelle
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To: brooklyn dave
Balls said the Queen...if I had them I'd be King.

I think that's usually phrased as:

"Balls said the Queen...I'd be King if I had t(w)o."

22 posted on 06/21/2005 12:19:51 PM PDT by Bob
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To: byset
For entertainment after the festival - the Vagina Monologues?
23 posted on 06/21/2005 12:20:29 PM PDT by Fido969
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To: cjshapi

Probably the nut house.


24 posted on 06/21/2005 12:20:34 PM PDT by Junior (“Even if you are one-in-a-million, there are still 6,000 others just like you.”)
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To: Cyrano; shaggy eel; blackie

I thought you could appreciate this...


25 posted on 06/21/2005 12:21:33 PM PDT by Terriergal (What is the meaning of life?? Man's chief end is to glorify God and to enjoy him for ever.)
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To: najida
So you won't be attending?

Not an event for me either.

26 posted on 06/21/2005 12:22:02 PM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: L,TOWM; All
Private (As he's leading Capt. Blackadder out to be executed by firing squad for shooting a pigeon): I've got to admire your balls.

Blackadder: Well, maybe later.

27 posted on 06/21/2005 12:23:41 PM PDT by Othniel (Call that job satisfaction? Cuz I don't........)
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To: pissant

Thought you might know some people who'd have fun with this thread.


28 posted on 06/21/2005 12:24:25 PM PDT by Steve1789 (Stay to the far right to get by.)
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To: byset

Turkey testicles? Uh...remind me to take a closer look at Ma's giblet gravy next Thanksgiving...


29 posted on 06/21/2005 12:25:25 PM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: byset

Sounds like the folks will have a ball.


30 posted on 06/21/2005 12:27:30 PM PDT by N. Theknow (If Social Security is so good - why aren't members of Congress in it?)
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To: byset

I don't eat theirs and they don't eat mine. We have a deal.


31 posted on 06/21/2005 12:29:27 PM PDT by avg_freeper (Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga)
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To: byset

Would be fun to go to a blue state liquor store and ask, "which wine goes better with testicles?"


32 posted on 06/21/2005 12:29:56 PM PDT by CO Gal (Liberals should be seen, but not heard..)
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To: Dashing Dasher

Especially at events like this!


33 posted on 06/21/2005 12:30:09 PM PDT by L,TOWM (Liberals, The Other White Meat [Born in California, Texan by the Grace of God.])
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To: byset

I have eaten alligator, rattlesnake, frog legs, escargot, rabbit, venison....but this I draw the line at.No way.


34 posted on 06/21/2005 12:30:37 PM PDT by FeliciaCat (I like my money where I can see it...hanging in my closet.)
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To: byset

Durban and Dean eat too many "lamb fries"


35 posted on 06/21/2005 12:31:03 PM PDT by DarthVader (Always ready to educate liberals by beating them profusely about the head with a Louisville Slugger.)
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To: L,TOWM

36 posted on 06/21/2005 12:31:18 PM PDT by Dashing Dasher (Jun 21, 1913, Georgia Broadwick became the first woman to parachute from an airplane.)
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To: byset
so the festival is known simply as the Sportsman's Club Testicle Festival.

Or, for short, the Festicle.

37 posted on 06/21/2005 12:31:36 PM PDT by RansomOttawa (tm)
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To: byset

Eh, this is wierd, real wierd

And I don't think it is appropriate for them to be celebrating "testicles" in a small town which probably has a lot of children


38 posted on 06/21/2005 12:31:59 PM PDT by AzaleaCity5691 (I will never be reconstructed, Deo Vindice)
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To: stylecouncilor

Festival of Meat ping


39 posted on 06/21/2005 12:33:30 PM PDT by windcliff
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To: AzaleaCity5691

Weird, sure - but testicles are a part of life.

Or they used to be.


40 posted on 06/21/2005 12:33:37 PM PDT by Dashing Dasher (Jun 21, 1913, Georgia Broadwick became the first woman to parachute from an airplane.)
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To: Dashing Dasher
BYOB

41 posted on 06/21/2005 12:35:31 PM PDT by evets
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To: Dashing Dasher

It's not a part of life that should be advertised in public.

Selling it on a snuff film is one thing, because kids can't buy snuff films (they still get a hold of them, but not because they bought it at Wal-Mart), the same with the old theatres they used to have in the 70s

But a town festival, going out of it's way to celebrate the joy of cojones, it's a bit much.


42 posted on 06/21/2005 12:35:39 PM PDT by AzaleaCity5691 (I will never be reconstructed, Deo Vindice)
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To: Dashing Dasher
"Or they used to be. "

I guess you did not try that new pickup line?

43 posted on 06/21/2005 12:35:40 PM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: byset
If I'm not happy with the service, I wonder if I can get this stuff in take-out? You know, like as in "I don't like it, so I'll take my ball and go home"?
44 posted on 06/21/2005 12:36:57 PM PDT by Jokelahoma (Animal testing is a bad idea. They get all nervous and give wrong answers.)
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To: Terriergal; shaggy eel
"Sportsman's Club Testicle Festival"

Sounds like a fun game. :)

45 posted on 06/21/2005 12:38:59 PM PDT by blackie (Be Well~Be Armed~Be Safe~Molon Labe!)
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To: AzaleaCity5691

Bill Frist rent a couple of charter buses and send all GOP Senators to go to this event they might learn something.


46 posted on 06/21/2005 12:40:00 PM PDT by jocko12
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick

Can ya get 'em honey glazed??


47 posted on 06/21/2005 12:40:34 PM PDT by blackie (Be Well~Be Armed~Be Safe~Molon Labe!)
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To: blackie
"Can ya get 'em honey glazed??"

If you like to rub honey on your balls, go for it baby!!!

48 posted on 06/21/2005 12:42:06 PM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick

Be careful ~ now. ;)


49 posted on 06/21/2005 12:44:44 PM PDT by blackie (Be Well~Be Armed~Be Safe~Molon Labe!)
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To: FeliciaCat

Actually, fried up just right and they are delicious. Years ago I lived on a cattle ranch and assisted in the annual harvest that took place every New Year's day. We'd cut 10 gallons worth. (As an aside, bulls do scream.) Roy Clark of Hee Haw fame flew into town every year for half the booty. Truly, they are considerably better than everything you listed with the possible exception of escargot.


50 posted on 06/21/2005 12:45:58 PM PDT by Quilla
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