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Mother makes appeal for a lover for 21-year-old Otto (He has Down's Syndrome)
The London Daily Mail ^ | March 17, 2009 | Luke Salkeld

Posted on 03/17/2009 1:00:43 AM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet

Like most mothers Lucy Baxter wants her child to live a fully rounded life - including the experience of a physical relationship and even finding love. But her 21-year-old son Otto has Down's syndrome and has had trouble finding a partner. So she is appealing for women to come forward so Otto can 'enjoy the same experiences as other men his age'.

She says she is even prepared to go so far as to pay for a prostitute for her adopted son. Miss Baxter, 50, also hopes he may one day become a father - despite the controversy this may attract. 'Society has a learning disability when it comes to Down's syndrome,' she said.

'Why should these people be kept separate and pigeon-holed when they have the same emotions, desires and feelings as so-called normal people?

'If he doesn't get a girlfriend, I will feel really bad, because I have sold him this thing that he is like everybody else. That's why I'm working overtime to get this sorted for him.'

Miss Baxter from Abingdon, Oxfordshire, works for the mental health charity Mencap and campaigns for the rights of those with Down's syndrome.

She is single and has never married but has three other adopted sons - James, 27, Titus, 14, and Raphael, seven. They all have Down's syndrome. She has already helped James to set up a page on a social networking website to invite potential partners to come forward for him. 'I'd like all my boys to find love and enjoy sex,' she said.

'I would have no problem paying for Otto to go to Amsterdam to visit a brothel if that's what he wanted.

(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...


TOPICS: Heated Discussion
KEYWORDS: disease; downssyndrome; sexuality; society
Comments?
1 posted on 03/17/2009 1:00:44 AM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

That’s a helluva mother right there.


2 posted on 03/17/2009 1:05:28 AM PDT by fieldmarshaldj (~"This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps !"~~)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
Here'a his perfect match according to eharmony.com


3 posted on 03/17/2009 1:09:51 AM PDT by Lancey Howard
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
I have sold him this thing that he is like everybody else.

Spiritually, yes. Physically, no.

Every human being has his particular cross to bear. I appears that this woman has allowed her emotions to cloud her judgment.

4 posted on 03/17/2009 1:11:34 AM PDT by Jeff Chandler (Obama's next program: Kopechne Care)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

What’s his determined “developmental level”? If he’s really only mildly developmentally disabled, then it’s not as bad (very close to normal) compared to a man with the “developmental level” of a twelve year old or less. Also, how much of what’s going on here is from just the mother, and how much of this is just from this man independently? There really are those with Downs Syndrome who do live like how most people normally live, because it’s only at a mild level.


5 posted on 03/17/2009 1:13:28 AM PDT by johnthebaptistmoore (Conservatives obey the rules. Leftists cheat. Who probably has the political advantage?)
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To: Lancey Howard

What did Otto ever do to you? LOL


6 posted on 03/17/2009 1:13:34 AM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet (In honor of my late father-Gysgt/Comm. Chief, USMC WWII, Korea 1925-2002)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

Can’t, I’m speechless.


7 posted on 03/17/2009 1:15:06 AM PDT by psjones (u)
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To: Lancey Howard
Here's his perfect match according to eharmony.com

Hmmm, he might decide it's preferable to stay with auto-eroticism.
8 posted on 03/17/2009 1:15:42 AM PDT by mkjessup (You're either with our Constitution, or you are with TKU ("The Kenyan Usurper"). CHOOSE!!!)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

Convenient they’re all boys. Wonder if she’d want the same for a 21-year-old daughter with the mind of a toddler.


9 posted on 03/17/2009 1:17:46 AM PDT by ExGeeEye (This is a picture, not an advertisement.)
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To: Lancey Howard

Ah, come on, now you’re insulting those with DS, including my 15 year old who has DS.


10 posted on 03/17/2009 1:18:31 AM PDT by psjones (u)
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To: johnthebaptistmoore

Yes, there is a lot that isn’t said here.


11 posted on 03/17/2009 1:21:48 AM PDT by Hawk1976 (It is better to die in battle than it is to live as a slave.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

This woman is a sick product of the pop culture and does nothing beneficial for her son this way.


12 posted on 03/17/2009 1:28:11 AM PDT by SumProVita (Cogito, ergo...Sum Pro Vita. (Modified DeCartes))
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To: Jeff Chandler

“I have sold him this thing that he is like everybody else.”

That phrasing strikes me as odd (”sold”?)- as if she doesn’t really even believe it. Not sure you are doing them a favor when you say “you are just like everyone else”.

You are special. You are loved. You bring me joy, are kind, etc. But - you are just like everybody else? Heck - I’m not like everybody else!!


13 posted on 03/17/2009 1:52:39 AM PDT by 21twelve (The Obamas have all the class of the Clintons and none of the charm.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

“’If he doesn’t get a girlfriend, I will feel really bad, because I have sold him this thing that he is like everybody else.”

This woman doesn’t think correctly about life. She has allowed PC and Reductionist Philosophy to determine her process. This was easy to see even earlier than reading that she is willing to hire a prostitute for her son.

The truth is, he is NOT like everybody else.

When children are born that are not like everybody else, they should not be lied to. They are different, they are wonderfully different, and they should be placed in the hands of Almighty God to teach them how their difference will bring glory to Him.

A child with Downs who can assess his place and is very aware of his own personality and needs can be taught to trust in the Living God for what he needs.

That is unless he has already been ruined by the teaching that mind is merely brain, brain is merely muscle, and muscle is merely an evolved chemical composition. In this teaching no SOUL is accounted for, neither spirit. Finally, no recognition of God, and no accountability to Him. Just get him a prostitute for sensual pleasure -— no accountability. The man is just an animal in heat, evidently, in his mother’s view.


14 posted on 03/17/2009 2:48:37 AM PDT by John Leland 1789
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To: ExGeeEye

Who says he has the mind of a toddler? Some guys with Down’s Syndrome are far more advanced/adapted than that. I worked with adults with developmental disabilities for several years. I’m thinking of one guy with Down’s Syndrome who carried on a long term relationship with a woman who also had Down’s Syndrome. I’m not saying they had sex, but they kissed, held hands, danced, went on dates. He would sing Elvis tunes to her, show off. He was emotionally on the level of your average teenage boy. He had a job. Liked playing football.


15 posted on 03/17/2009 4:19:58 AM PDT by Huck ("He that lives on hope will die fasting"- Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

I think she’s putting the cart before the horse. She shouldn’t be looking for sex. She should be helping him to find relationships. He should be able to date, go to movies, dances, take a girl out to eat, etc. It makes no sense to look for sexual gratification without having had the experience of building a relationship. He should hook up with social servive orgs that service other people with disabilities. Catholic churches often sponsor socials/dances for these orgs. He should go to some dances, interact, maybe meet someone who likes him. Talk. Hold hands. Go on a date. That’s plenty for now.


16 posted on 03/17/2009 4:22:47 AM PDT by Huck ("He that lives on hope will die fasting"- Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

My mom sold me that I’m better looking than Brad Pitt, therefore I demand to sleep with supermodels.


17 posted on 03/17/2009 4:31:00 AM PDT by Conan the Conservative (Crush the liberals, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of the hippies.)
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To: Lancey Howard

That was cruel. Not even I would recommend that.


18 posted on 03/17/2009 4:42:16 AM PDT by sauropod
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

I knew this was England before I clicked.


19 posted on 03/17/2009 4:43:31 AM PDT by palmer (Cooperating with Obama = helping him extend the depression and implement socialism.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

She wants him to become a father? She’s kidding, right? I thought people with DS were not able to have children. It’s a genetic thing that interferes with fertility. Am I wrong? Perhaps I misunderstood something along the way.


20 posted on 03/17/2009 5:32:48 AM PDT by Gumdrop
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

This woman is wrong. I give her props for adopting so many DS boys, but she needs to stop acting as a procurer.


21 posted on 03/17/2009 5:54:16 AM PDT by agere_contra (So ... where's the birth certificate?)
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To: Lancey Howard

Babs Boxer would be “marrying up” as they say...... she’s lucky to hit two digits on an IQ test.


22 posted on 03/17/2009 7:31:53 AM PDT by Enchante (Of course I want Obama to "fail" in his effort to transform America into a socialist miasma)
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To: Huck

Not me.

I postulated a notional DS girl with the mind of a toddler.

Such a case is, I believe, within the realm of possibility.


23 posted on 03/17/2009 7:48:00 AM PDT by ExGeeEye ("Jumping to conclusions" is NOT good exercise, in body or in mind, rather the reverse.)
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To: Huck

Thanks for posting, Huck. I have a buddy who’s blind, and I realize Downs is completely different than a physical or sensory disability, like blindness, but for me there’s a comparison. I mean, most people whose bodies “run like a deer” go through some period of being lonely. But if you have Downs or whatever, loneliness is kind of guaranteed, short of a miracle, which this guy’s mother seems to be trying to strongarm. I think its easy to forget that part. We say, sucks to be Jake, because he can’t see anything, but it also sucks to be Jake because the number of women who would even consider dating him is cut down by maybe 99%. (Some of whom, though, are pretty cool...)


24 posted on 03/18/2009 6:13:55 AM PDT by Doc Prospero
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To: Doc Prospero
I would say this mom is obviously going about things the wrong way. For starters, sex shouldn't be a goal for this kid. The goal should be a rewarding social life. Lonliness does not have to be the fate of a person with Down's Syndrome. And while I'm all for integrating people with developmental disabilities into the community as much as possible, I think the best strategy for these individuals is to provide opportunities for them to interact and socialize with others on their level.

Some people with Down's are quite functional. They can converse. They have hobbies and interests, etc. Others are more severely afflicted. If this guy is "high-functioning", he should have opportunities to meet and hang out with others who are also high functioning. He should be given opportunities to get a job, so that he can also interact in a normal way with healthy people.

In short, the goal should be to enrich his life with relationship opportunities equal to his abilities. He shouldn't be held back, but he shouldn't be coaxed into something he isn't ready for or doesn't understand. He should be coached and supported. He should be given every opportunity to grow and improve his skills and abilities, and hence, his quality of life. The self-confidence that springs from such experiences would make him a more attractive suitor to the ladies with disabilities that he would meet. If he can score a movie date, steal a kiss, hold hands, even hug and pet, more power to him. But that should occur as part of an overall progression where he is coached and encouraged to grow and take on as much independence as possible. Sex shouldn't even enter into the discussion, unless and until he has achieved all these other things.

Mom means well, but she's smothering him, and not providing the kind of assistance he needs. My two cents from someone who worked with such individuals for several years.

25 posted on 03/18/2009 6:41:46 AM PDT by Huck ("He that lives on hope will die fasting"- Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac)
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To: Huck

Huck, I agree with you completely. I just cringe a little when I see all the posts along the lines of “this dude is disabled, disabled people (A) don’t have sex or romance, and (B) don’t mind.

But yeah, the mom...oh dear.


26 posted on 03/18/2009 8:59:23 AM PDT by Doc Prospero
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

I could understand how a mother would want her son to experience life. However, is he mentally able to understand everything that goes along with relationships and sexual encounters?


27 posted on 03/22/2009 9:30:47 PM PDT by Rustabout
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To: John Leland 1789

I agree with you.

I think it is somewhat telling that the mother said she wants him to have a physical relationship and enjoy the things that others [men] do.

I would have no problem if she was trying to take care of her son by looking out for his best interests; and she no doubt thinks that she is, but what he needs is the constant, consistent love in 1 cor 13. {But then, we all need that.}


28 posted on 03/28/2009 9:50:44 PM PDT by OneWingedShark (Q: Why am I here? A: To do Justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with my God.)
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To: ExGeeEye
"Convenient they’re all boys. Wonder if she’d want the same for a 21-year-old daughter with the mind of a toddler."

Pwnd.

I was going to say if she sold him the bill of goods he was just like everyone else, then shame on her. Now I just wish I had thought of your comment instead.

29 posted on 05/13/2009 7:16:06 PM PDT by UsnDadof8 (Just Shoot Me)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
I'm also kinda wondering why she didn't just contact this woman here...

Image Hosting by PictureTrail.com

30 posted on 05/14/2009 7:14:08 PM PDT by UsnDadof8 (Just Shoot Me)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
I know I'm late to the party, but I found a pic of Otto that I would like to share.


31 posted on 07/13/2009 1:38:38 PM PDT by AxelPaulsenJr (Please God Save The United States From Barack Hussein Al-Obama. Amen.)
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