Posted on 06/30/2014 9:05:18 PM PDT by nickcarraway
The sorry tale of Ben Sullivan only serves to show how complex the issues surrounding rape allegations have become, writes Claire Cohen
Last week, the 21-year-old president of the Oxford Union was cleared of all charges against him – having been accused of the rape, and attempted rape, of two students last year.
Now, leaked documents appear to show one of the women admitting online that their encounter was ‘consensual’, almost a year before Sullivan’s arrest.
It’s tempting to see these leaked documents as containing a tacit admission of consent. But that would be an over-simplification.
Yes, the woman seems to agree with Sullivan that sexual intercourse took place. But that isn’t the same as consent. Nothing about it is black and white.
As a general proposition it’s vital to remember that rape doesn’t always look like rape. Sometimes, what looks like consensual sex can be rape. And even if you’ve had a consensual relationship with someone in the past, it doesn’t mean it can’t be rape either.
More than one in five women is raped by their husband, or partner. This should dispel the myth that rape involves being dragged down a dark alleyway at knifepoint. Such cases do, of course, occur but don’t constitute the majority of trials. Most rapes happen in the home - often between two people who, on the surface, might appear consenting and agree that intercourse did take place. The issue is one of consent and there is nothing ambiguous about a woman’s rights to give or not give her consent at any time. Where ambiguity may arise is whether on particular facts, sex was consensual or not. The principle is clear, the difficulty emerges in application.
There are multiple shades of grey; some not even apparent to the accuser.
(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...
B.S.
Oh for pete’s sake. Never in my life (and I am no spring chicken) have I been in the position (ahem) where I wasn’t entirely sure if I was consenting. This girl is too dumb to have sex. Toss her in a convent and be done with her.
You mean like if a black teenager on drugs is pounding the head of a white guy on the pavement and telling him that he's going to kill him, there are multiple shades of grey that are not even apparent to the accuser, and therefore no self-defense should be used because the only way to be sure that murder was actually taking place is by... being killed?
Unless, of course, it's a woman, in which case the way you felt as you drove by on the freeway when you looked at a "male" justifies you calling in a SWAT team to fire a missile at him from a drone and enable you to feel "safe"?
Those kind of grey areas, b@tch?
Paging whoopi; is it rape or rape-rape?
Snicker snicker
More than one in five women is raped by their husband, or partner.
Rape is, by definition, non-consensual. But she gave consent when she made her vows. And it should be mutual.
I speak as a man who’s wife refused sex for 14 months before she divorced me. In counseling she accused me of sexual abuse (a preposterous claim but not germane here) and the counselor said, “you know, withholding sex is also a form of sexual abuse.”
She refused to go any more.
Meanwhile, my second wife and I just celebrated our 16th anniversary and the honeymoon never ended. It became a new life of marital bliss that I honestly thought was only real in chick films and fiction.
Too much information.
I think what a lot of this gray-area stuff comes down to is “misgivings” after the fact.
That being said, no spouse will force the other unreasonably or violently if the bonds of marital trust are to be maintained. Likewise, no spouse will unreasonably withhold from the other for the same reason.
Actually it is.
Did you agree to go to bed together or did you protest and try to get away?
In the first case there was consent. In the second there was not.
I have noticed that liberals have a pathological desire to make things that are simple and clear complicated and messy.
Too much information.
By unglued, I mean in the same vein as the comments from liberals about the hobby lobby decision. ;-)
You said ... “That stat always cracks me up. How can a husband rape his wife?”
You may not be aware of it, but there is law out there saying that this can be done and men have been convicted in a court of law. It’s a definite fact.
That being said, no spouse will force the other unreasonably or violently if the bonds of marital trust are to be maintained. Likewise, no spouse will unreasonably withhold from the other for the same reason.
“That stat always cracks me up. How can a husband rape his wife? Her body is not her own, but her husband’s also.”
Great to meet a fellow knuckle dragger.
I experienced the same wonderful marital bliss that you speak of until I cut up the credit cards. I often wonder if there was a connection.
You may not be aware of it, but there is law out there saying that this can be done and men have been convicted in a court of law. It’s a definite fact.
Consent today, regret tomorrow.
Probably. It’s a subtle narcissism.
Just to make it clear so nobody gets the wrong idea here ...
— — —
Marital rape, also known as spousal rape, is non-consensual sex in which the perpetrator is the victim’s spouse. It is a form of partner rape, of domestic violence, and of sexual abuse. Marital rape is today illegal in all 50 US states.
The legal history of marital rape laws in the United States is a long and complex one, that spans over several decades. The criminalization of marital rape in the United States started in the mid-1970s and by 1993 marital rape became a crime in all 50 states, under at least one section of the sexual offense codes. At that time, most states differentiated between the way marital rape and non-marital rape were treated. The laws have continued to change and evolve since 1993, but in some states, there still remain differences.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marital_rape_(United_States_law)
Great to meet a fellow knuckle dragger.
When I want to get in touch with my feminine side, I reach for my wife. And she reciprocates.
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