Skip to comments.Michael Moore finally issues comments on Bush victory!
Posted on 11/05/2004 12:08:20 AM PST by NY Patriot
Well the fat SOB has finally come out from under his pile of candy bar & cheese burger wrappers to comment on GWB's victory...
17 Reasons Not to Slit Your Wrists...by Michael Moore
Ok, it sucks. Really sucks. But before you go and cash it all in, let's, in the words of Monty Python, always look on the bright side of life! There IS some good news from Tuesday's election.
Here are 17 reasons not to slit your wrists:
1. It is against the law for George W. Bush to run for president again.
2. Bush's victory was the NARROWEST win for a sitting president since Woodrow Wilson in 1916.
3. The only age group in which the majority voted for Kerry was young adults (Kerry: 54%, Bush: 44%), proving once again that your parents are always wrong and you should never listen to them.
4. In spite of Bush's win, the majority of Americans still think the country is headed in the wrong direction (56%), think the war wasn't worth fighting (51%), and dont approve of the job George W. Bush is doing (52%). (Note to foreigners: Don't try to figure this one out. It's an American thing, like Pop Tarts.)
5. The Republicans will not have a filibuster-proof 60-seat majority in the Senate. If the Democrats do their job, Bush won't be able to pack the Supreme Court with right-wing ideologues. Did I say "if the Democrats do their job?" Um, maybe better to scratch this one.
6. Michigan voted for Kerry! So did the entire Northeast, the birthplace of our democracy. So did 6 of the 8 Great Lakes States. And the whole West Coast! Plus Hawaii. Ok, that's a start. We've got most of the fresh water, all of Broadway, and Mt. St. Helens. We can dehydrate them or bury them in lava. And no more show tunes!
7. Once again we are reminded that the buckeye is a nut, and not just any old nut -- a poisonous nut. A great nation was felled by a poisonous nut. May Ohio State pay dearly this Saturday when it faces Michigan.
8. 88% of Bush's support came from white voters. In 50 years, America will no longer have a white majority. Hey, 50 years isn't such a long time! If you're ten years old and reading this, your golden years will be truly golden and you will be well cared for in your old age.
9. Gays, thanks to the ballot measures passed on Tuesday, cannot get married in 11 new states. Thank God. Just think of all those wedding gifts we won't have to buy now.
10. Five more African Americans were elected as members of Congress, including the return of Cynthia McKinney of Georgia. It's always good to have more blacks in there fighting for us and doing the job our candidates can't.
11. The CEO of Coors was defeated for Senate in Colorado. Drink up!
12. Admit it: We like the Bush twins and we don't want them to go away.
13. At the state legislative level, Democrats picked up a net of at least 3 chambers in Tuesday's elections. Of the 98 partisan-controlled state legislative chambers (house/assembly and senate), Democrats went into the 2004 elections in control of 44 chambers, Republicans controlled 53 chambers, and 1 chamber was tied. After Tuesday, Democrats now control 47 chambers, Republicans control 49 chambers, 1 chamber is tied and 1 chamber (Montana House) is still undecided.
14. Bush is now a lame duck president. He will have no greater moment than the one he's having this week. It's all downhill for him from here on out -- and, more significantly, he's just not going to want to do all the hard work that will be expected of him. It'll be like everyone's last month in 12th grade -- you've already made it, so it's party time! Perhaps he'll treat the next four years like a permanent Friday, spending even more time at the ranch or in Kennebunkport. And why shouldn't he? He's already proved his point, avenged his father and kicked our ass.
15. Should Bush decide to show up to work and take this country down a very dark road, it is also just as likely that either of the following two scenarios will happen: a) Now that he doesn't ever need to pander to the Christian conservatives again to get elected, someone may whisper in his ear that he should spend these last four years building "a legacy" so that history will render a kinder verdict on him and thus he will not push for too aggressive a right-wing agenda; or b) He will become so cocky and arrogant -- and thus, reckless -- that he will commit a blunder of such major proportions that even his own party will have to remove him from office.
16. There are nearly 300 million Americans -- 200 million of them of voting age. We only lost by three and a half million! That's not a landslide -- it means we're almost there. Imagine losing by 20 million. If you had 58 yards to go before you reached the goal line and then you barreled down 55 of those yards, would you stop on the three yard line, pick up the ball and go home crying -- especially when you get to start the next down on the three yard line? Of course not! Buck up! Have hope! More sports analogies are coming!!!
17. Finally and most importantly, over 55 million Americans voted for the candidate dubbed "The #1 Liberal in the Senate." That's more than the total number of voters who voted for either Reagan, Bush I, Clinton or Gore. Again, more people voted for Kerry than Reagan. If the media are looking for a trend it should be this -- that so many Americans were, for the first time since Kennedy, willing to vote for an out-and-out liberal. The country has always been filled with evangelicals -- that is not news. What IS news is that so many people have shifted toward a Massachusetts liberal. In fact, that's BIG news. Which means, don't expect the mainstream media, the ones who brought you the Iraq War, to ever report the real truth about November 2, 2004. In fact, it's better that they don't. We'll need the element of surprise in 2008.
Feeling better? I hope so. As my friend Mort wrote me yesterday, "My Romanian grandfather used to say to me, 'Remember, Morton, this is such a wonderful country -- it doesn't even need a president!'"
But it needs us. Rest up, I'll write you again tomorrow.
Did Moore pass this by his mentor Noam Chomsky first?
I really wish Stone and Parker had done more on Moore in TA. Like having him bitch slapped by that 8 year old French kid in the first scene of the movie.
I say we feed him to a village of cannibals as a foreign aid project.
Ample proof he's a moron, he has an aol e-mail address.
This is like something a "slow" ninth grader would write for "social studies". Oh, and as for the names and mosaic of our fallen soldiers; nothing could be more despicable than using dead heroes in a political way for a cause that most of them would not have agreed with. WHO MADE MICHAEL MOORE THE CONSCIENCE OF THE WORLD?!!
Folks, how do I link this thread to News/Current Events?
Moore doesn't want any Dems to slit their wrists until they've wasted 10 bucks on his next movie.
What southern governor has balanced his budget without an income tax, increased employment, improved education, and was re-elected in a landslide two years ago?
JEB BUSH in '08!
It's never too early to start.
He seems to thinks his party is headed in the right direction.
I hope he really believes this.
Well that little diatribe brings to mind the the old saying "There are lies. There are damned lie. And there are statistics" Where this guy gets his numbers is beyond me. I think he has been eating too many gin soaked raisins with Mrs. Kerry. (Which by the way has she taken off for the detox center yet?) Fortunately for Moore he is not burdened with a conscience so telling whoppers is no problem for him. The one that cracks me up is that most is that more whites voted for Bush than minorities. Could to be that they are more whites to vote in the first place than there are minorities? No that would make too much sense.
Himself. He's the king maker don't ya know
There was a guy called Richard Neville who fancied himself, "The Kingmaker" once upon a time.
Came to a very bad end as I recall. Moore should put down the cookies and read a little history.
Did he call Ohians nuts?
WHO MADE MICHAEL MOORE THE CONSCIENCE OF THE WORLD?!!
Mike Moore did, and the MSM. This is why we have to get the word out about us
He seems to thinks his party is headed in the right direction.
They are...into irrelevance just like moore.
I posted my responses under the first thread posted with the name of Michael Moore's article. I stayed online to voice off and that seem to be the overlooked thread.
Mike's FIRST response after LOSING the election (it was as much his at it was Kerry's) was to post the "names" of the war dead as compiled by leftists (not all are combat injuries nor were all illnesses/injuries even sustained in Iraq).
Here is an approriate response to Michael Moore's trafficking in death:
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