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DUmmie FUnnies 03-28-06 (Ouija Board Polls)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | March 28, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 03/28/2006 5:37:19 AM PST by PJ-Comix

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This is weird. Yesterday afternoon I wrote an essay in my head on the subject of how polls are like Ouija Boards. I definitely planned on writing up that essay and ship it around for publication. Then I saw this DUmmie thread last night and it gave me the opportunity to incorporate that essay into this DUFU edition, thus the length of the intro.

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List.

1 posted on 03/28/2006 5:37:22 AM PST by PJ-Comix
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


2 posted on 03/28/2006 5:38:15 AM PST by PJ-Comix ((Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

3


3 posted on 03/28/2006 5:39:07 AM PST by investigateworld (Abortion stops a beating heart)
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To: PJ-Comix

Almost beat the PING...


4 posted on 03/28/2006 5:39:19 AM PST by JRios1968 (E=mc3...the origin of "friends don't let friends derive drunk.")
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To: PJ-Comix
[Think about it. We have a strong economy now. Think about it.]

But if you read the media and even some who post on FR, you would believe we are in the middle of a 1930's-style depression. So what if we have had year after year of growth.

5 posted on 03/28/2006 5:41:37 AM PST by Always Right
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To: PJ-Comix

This was rather enlightening, in an amusing way.


6 posted on 03/28/2006 5:42:42 AM PST by IllumiNaughtyByNature (My Pug is On Her War Footing)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10???


7 posted on 03/28/2006 5:42:50 AM PST by jennyjenny
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To: PJ-Comix

I'm in the top 10!


8 posted on 03/28/2006 5:43:19 AM PST by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: PJ-Comix

first top 10?


9 posted on 03/28/2006 5:47:00 AM PST by CSM (Lick a finger, politicize the wind, and place the finger into the wind. - EGPWS, 1/26/2006)
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To: PJ-Comix

I am so confused..Bush not only won re-election in 04 thru the electoral college, but also won a majority of the popular vote..first time since his father did it 88..now polls are telling us that nearly half of his voters are against him????? I don't think so..


10 posted on 03/28/2006 5:50:28 AM PST by BerniesFriend
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To: PJ-Comix
"...there apparently exists a solid, unshakable 33%-40% bloc of support for a president with authoritarian leanings and a seemingly complete disregard for the Constitution and Bill of Rights...no matter how badly he does.

This DUmmie seems to be talking about Bill Clinton and his penchant for domestic spying and 21 year old interns....

11 posted on 03/28/2006 5:52:11 AM PST by NRA1995 (Democrats.....the party of comic relief)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10? Or 20?


12 posted on 03/28/2006 5:52:51 AM PST by Alexander Rubin (Octavius - You make my heart glad building thus, as if Rome is to be eternal.)
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To: Always Right
But if you read the media and even some who post on FR, you would believe we are in the middle of a 1930's-style depression. So what if we have had year after year of growth.

Yeah, right. I remember during the elections of 2004, the Bostonian Richman was alleging this was the "worst economy" since the Great Depression.....or the Panic of 1837.....or since the Middle Ages.....or since the Dark Ages.....or since ancient Egypt.....the Bostonian Richman apparently forgot the CarterDepression of 1978-1982, and the economy in 2004 was the difference between day and night.

Why do the DUmmies always forget the CarterDepression, which resulted in his losing to Ronald Reagan in 1980 by a Herbert Hooverian margin? (You can check it out; Reagan beat Carter by the same percentages in 1980 as Roosevelt had defeated Hoover in 1932.)

13 posted on 03/28/2006 5:53:31 AM PST by franksolich (by the way, I'm back now)
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To: PJ-Comix
I am almost certain I saw Rasmussen yesterday and W was at 45%.

Yesterday, two successful, self-made millionaires, who are both strong donks supporting Finegold, were gleeful that the NYT article from Blair's Foreign Policy Adviser detailing the fact that W was ready to go to war even w/o an 18th resolution would be the lead news story today and would take down the POTUS.

PJ, is there a DUmmie thread on this? No time or stomach to go over there myself. I do suspect that somewhere in the moonbat blogosphere, they are already chanting "This is the day everything will change", even though the article is a retread of a story from last summer.
14 posted on 03/28/2006 5:54:42 AM PST by reformedliberal
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To: PJ-Comix
The only people I know who still support him are truly uninformed or stupid, or religiously insane.

I have to repeat this often enough I ought to just coin it "kevkrom's postulate"... one of the worst things you can do, from an intellectual standpoint, is to assume that someone who disgrees with your conclusions is either ingorant or crazy. If you cannot even acknowledge the possibility that the other side of the argument has reasons for its position, then maybe it's you who are the closed-minded bigot.

15 posted on 03/28/2006 5:55:05 AM PST by kevkrom ("...no one has ever successfully waged a war against stupidity" - Orson Scott Card)
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To: PJ-Comix
considering the crap polls put out by the former MSM I'd say Oiuja boards are more scientifically accurate than an MSM poll.
16 posted on 03/28/2006 5:56:19 AM PST by CzarNicky (The problem with bad ideas is that they seemed like good ideas at the time.)
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To: PJ-Comix
" The 33% are the Christofascisti; they've been told Bush is God, err, good and they always believe what they've been told to believe.

I must've missed that memo. Seriously, liberals - keep spitting on Christians. And keep questioning why you're still losing. Me? I'm happy on all fronts.

17 posted on 03/28/2006 5:57:28 AM PST by RabidBartender
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To: PJ-Comix
bloc of support for a president with.......a seemingly complete disregard for the Constitution and Bill of Rights

Talk about funny!....especially when you consider the source.
18 posted on 03/28/2006 5:58:02 AM PST by socialismisinsidious ( The socialist income tax system turns US citizens into beggars or quitters!)
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To: PJ-Comix
Of course, the professional pollsters later claimed that there was a series of "logical" reasons to explain away the huge error of the Exit Polls: overpolling certain groups, underpolling other groups, using amateur data collectors, etc., etc.. And I can give them "logical" explanations as to why the Ouija Board of my teenage experience was not accurate. I have my own theory. I've been hanging out too long on DU, so, of course, it is a conspiracy theory. The DUmmies believe that it was only due to a conspiracy by the Evil Republicans that the actual election results did not match the Exit Polls. Diebold, suppressing the "minority" vote, etc. etc.

My theory is this. The pollsters were actively trying to influence the elections by making it seem that Kerry had ALREADY won. Then the Evil Republican voters would stay home, and not vote.

Having been caught calling the polls closed too early in Florida, they could not try that trick again so soon. So this is what they came up with.

I figure this conspiracy theory has at least as much validity as the ones floating around over at DU.

19 posted on 03/28/2006 6:01:31 AM PST by chesley (Liberals...what's not to loathe?)
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To: PJ-Comix

It does aggrevate me that the network news (like ABC radio in the middle of Rush's program) leads with whatever the biased poll of the day is followed by the death toll in Iraq.

Like the ABC news executive that emailed his hatred of President Bush, they are so desperate for a Republican defeat in Nov.

I'll be glad when this election is over but with the Republicans spending like drunken sailors and granting amnesty, I begin to wonder if we'd be better off with a government split by party lines.


20 posted on 03/28/2006 6:01:39 AM PST by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Rush has fooled me into thinking that supporting the overthrow of tyrannies in the ME, supporting the growth of Democracy, appointing Judges that don't legislate, allowing people to keep more of their earnings and promoting an ownership society are all the opposit of Fascism.

These DUmmies are truly deluded.


21 posted on 03/28/2006 6:11:44 AM PST by CSM (Lick a finger, politicize the wind, and place the finger into the wind. - EGPWS, 1/26/2006)
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To: kevkrom

Spot on postulate, there.

I always find it entertaining that the DUmmies wax on and on about the mind-set and ideology of the Christian right. These, who find any concept of God or deity intervention and determination, abhorrent to the point of shoouting their gnosticism from the virtual rooftops, are somehow experts on religiosity ion America.

A bit later on, we hear them summarize their paranoid stupidity by saying (paraphrase), "I don't understand why the rest of America isn't politically rabid and drooling like us."

Dude, the rest of America has better things to do...like leave the basement and go to work each day.


22 posted on 03/28/2006 6:12:17 AM PST by Cletus.D.Yokel (GWBush for Commish of Baseball! It's in his blood! Pass it on.)
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To: PJ-Comix
>>>>>>>>The 33% are the Christofascisti; they've been told Bush is God,


If they are Christofascisti, and they've read the X Commandments; (This typical DUmbass has not) they would understand that worshiping Bush as God would be an act of apostasy that would get any true Christofascisti hanged.
23 posted on 03/28/2006 6:14:38 AM PST by .cnI redruM ("Brother, you can believe in stones, as long as you don't throw them at me. - W. Sultan)
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To: PJ-Comix
[Yes, DUmmies. Toss yourselves over the cliff in frustration over poll results that are no more accurate than a Ouija Board.]


24 posted on 03/28/2006 6:27:04 AM PST by LUV W (A free Iraq . ... will serve as an amazing example for people who are desparate for freedom! GWB)
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To: LUV W; PJ-Comix

Into the top 30 like a turtle on speed!


25 posted on 03/28/2006 6:39:47 AM PST by Mr. Silverback (GOP Blend Coffee--"Coffee for Conservative Taste!" Go to www.gopetc.com)
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To: PJ-Comix

I worked for several years as a Software Engineer for big Polling company. Take it from me -- polls can be systematically manipulated to produce the desired result. The question's wording, the sample demographics and the weighting that is applied to the results are all "art" not "science". Many polling practices are based in theoretical assumptions.

But the reputable polling companies do not produce many of these "public opinion" polls or partner with the MSM organizations. Public opinion polls may produce headlines and send our Dummies hearts a-thumpin', but these polls are not big revenue producers.

There is BIG money to be made in the market research arena.
Companies are willing to pay dearly for the opinions of the consumers of their goods and services. One example that was extremely lucrative is the pharmeceutical industry.
The drug producers need the polling companies to guage the effacacy and side-effect occurence of their products.
However, in my experience the market-research polls are conducted more scientifically than the public-opinion polls. The influence of the political agenda of the polls sponsors does not affect the methodolgy. The polling companies would lose credibility if the results were deemed unreliable. A polling company's reputation is their only asset.


26 posted on 03/28/2006 6:40:40 AM PST by Ludicrous (I support a woman's right to choose an effective contraceptive method.)
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To: PJ-Comix

"(and the Constitution be damned)"

They don't have a clue what the constitution even says. Acording to them it looks like the communist manifesto.


27 posted on 03/28/2006 6:45:26 AM PST by imskylark
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To: Ludicrous
Take it from me -- polls can be systematically manipulated to produce the desired result. The question's wording, the sample demographics and the weighting that is applied to the results are all "art" not "science".

i.e. The polling planchette.

28 posted on 03/28/2006 6:47:30 AM PST by PJ-Comix ((Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: NRA1995
This DUmmie seems to be talking about Bill Clinton and his penchant for domestic spying...

I wonder if it is too late to censure Klintoon for possessing all those FBI files on private American citizens? Or better yet, how about censuring Hildabeast............?

29 posted on 03/28/2006 6:47:48 AM PST by AxelPaulsenJr (More people died in Ted Kennedy's car than hunting with Dick Cheney.)
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To: Mr. Silverback

You should try the Columbian blend...meth cut with crack and mellowed with coke.

That'll get near the top twenty.

Oh...and Will Pitt is the Bob Schrum of our time...


30 posted on 03/28/2006 6:56:51 AM PST by Cletus.D.Yokel (GWBush for Commish of Baseball! It's in his blood! Pass it on.)
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To: chesley

"My theory is this. The pollsters were actively trying to influence the elections by making it seem that Kerry had ALREADY won."

What is funny is that it had the opposite effect. We went into high gear making phone calls encouraging people to vote. Most of the people I spoke to were very determined to cast their vote for Pres. Bush. It was so cool having the people you call give you the pep talk.


31 posted on 03/28/2006 6:57:47 AM PST by imskylark
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To: PJ-Comix
Even more important the astrological chart shows the Moon rising in Uranus which does not portend well for Bush.

Wait a minute...isn't their anus part of their moon...I'm confused, but have no desire to dwell on the subject.

32 posted on 03/28/2006 6:58:23 AM PST by Mr. Silverback (GOP Blend Coffee--"Coffee for Conservative Taste!" Go to www.gopetc.com)
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To: PJ-Comix

...planchette...

? emphasis on the first syllable or second? I'm guess second.


33 posted on 03/28/2006 6:58:29 AM PST by Cletus.D.Yokel (GWBush for Commish of Baseball! It's in his blood! Pass it on.)
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To: Incorrigible

That "wonder" is NO.


34 posted on 03/28/2006 6:58:35 AM PST by justshutupandtakeit (If you believe ANYTHING in the Treason Media you are a fool.)
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To: Mr. Silverback

Dude...if the Moon were rising with Uranus, all would be in order.

There is no order in DUmmie land.


35 posted on 03/28/2006 7:00:30 AM PST by Cletus.D.Yokel (GWBush for Commish of Baseball! It's in his blood! Pass it on.)
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel

Correct.


36 posted on 03/28/2006 7:03:24 AM PST by PJ-Comix ((Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Mr. Silverback

Hee-hee! Good to see you at any speed! Hi!


37 posted on 03/28/2006 7:03:35 AM PST by LUV W (A free Iraq . ... will serve as an amazing example for people who are desparate for freedom! GWB)
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To: PJ-Comix

top 50 from an aeroplane, no less ;)


38 posted on 03/28/2006 7:19:22 AM PST by freedumb2003 (Don't call them "Illegal Aliens." Call them what they are: CRIMINAL INVADERS!)
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To: chesley
My theory is this. The pollsters were actively trying to influence the elections by making it seem that Kerry had ALREADY won. Then the Evil Republican voters would stay home, and not vote.

Certainly was the case. Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh were on the radio saying don't believe the poll and described how it was an unbalanced sample of voters.

It was a last minute attempt to further make up the news (as happened repeated in the 2004 election, including the forged National Guard memos). The lead 7 minutes of the election coverage ON ALL 3 networks after the polls closed was "Well, Bush lost this election for the same reason as his father, the economy..." Then they realized that their script was obviously wrong.

When they cooked the books on polling figures, they forgot to keep a true accounting so they knew how much they'd still have to make up in knock and drag or dead voter efforts.

39 posted on 03/28/2006 7:20:41 AM PST by weegee ("Republicans believe every day is the Fourth of July, but Democrats believe every day is April 15.")
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To: Cletus.D.Yokel

...planchette...

? emphasis on the first syllable or second? I'm guess second.




Why use a fancy, unpronouncable French word when there is a perfectly good English term like "plastic slidey doohickey"?

SD


40 posted on 03/28/2006 7:23:24 AM PST by SoothingDave
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To: PJ-Comix
Awesome Analogy! I will be using it with your permission over and over and over.....

"Yes," I replied, "I need to be told how to think."

LOL!

they are sick people and why we pay one damn bit of attention to those sicko's is beyond me..they are not even a real minority.

What exactly is "not even a real minority"? A majority in reality?
41 posted on 03/28/2006 7:23:50 AM PST by Eagle of Liberty (The Democrat Party is engulfed in a Culture of Hypocrisy)
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To: PJ-Comix
there apparently exists a solid, unshakable 33%-40% bloc of support for a president

Bill Clinton never got much more than 40% of the vote in either election yet he had a solid base of 37% or so who believed that he could do no wrong that couldn't be excused when the pollsters came around.

42 posted on 03/28/2006 7:25:27 AM PST by weegee ("Republicans believe every day is the Fourth of July, but Democrats believe every day is April 15.")
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To: Kerretarded

"Not a real minority" means that they are not a Politically Correct minority so it is alright to attack them, refuse them service/employment, and spit on their children because they "don't count".


43 posted on 03/28/2006 7:26:43 AM PST by weegee ("Republicans believe every day is the Fourth of July, but Democrats believe every day is April 15.")
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To: chesley
My theory is this. The pollsters were actively trying to influence the elections by making it seem that Kerry had ALREADY won. Then the Evil Republican voters would stay home, and not vote.

Always remember the announcement that ALL Exit poll results would be released by one source, I believe CNN, to avoid a repeat of 2000. I firmly believe that this was done so that the Exit polls could always be used as "evidence" that W stole two elections.
44 posted on 03/28/2006 7:49:26 AM PST by Eagle of Liberty (The Democrat Party is engulfed in a Culture of Hypocrisy)
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To: imskylark

I always vote. No matter what. At least I have done what I could to avert disaster.


45 posted on 03/28/2006 8:07:12 AM PST by chesley (Liberals...what's not to loathe?)
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To: AxelPaulsenJr

I can't post here the fate I'd like for the two of them.....


46 posted on 03/28/2006 8:08:46 AM PST by NRA1995 (Democrats.....the party of comic relief)
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To: weegee
"Not a real minority" means that they are not a Politically Correct minority so it is alright to attack them, refuse them service/employment, and spit on their children because they "don't count".

Oh, silly me. The "All Americans count except you and you and well, you" BS.
47 posted on 03/28/2006 8:08:47 AM PST by Eagle of Liberty (The Democrat Party is engulfed in a Culture of Hypocrisy)
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To: Kerretarded
Well, as I said, if, as the DUmmies claim, it is statistically impossible that the exit polls and the actual results could vary as much as they did if the election was honest; then all I can say is, "what makes you so sure that the polls were honest?" Assuming, for the sake of argument, that something was not on the up and up, how come one side is always assumed to be the villain, and the other side is assumed to be totally innocent? DUmmies, Where's the meat?
48 posted on 03/28/2006 8:11:58 AM PST by chesley (Liberals...what's not to loathe?)
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To: PJ-Comix
In other words, a bloc who prefer right-wing philosophy to democracy. And that's a chilling thought indeed, because, long after Bush is gone, they'll still be voting.

Actually this Dummie stumbled into a truth. We do prefer a right wing philosophy. In other words we prefer the Constitution as written, to the cancerous growth we have today, and we prefer a republic to a democracy. We also intend to be around a long long time.

49 posted on 03/28/2006 8:47:48 AM PST by NathanR (Après moi, le deluge.)
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To: weegee

B-b-but I thought Bush stole Ohio! /sarc


50 posted on 03/28/2006 8:56:20 AM PST by Purrcival (Pied Piper Pitt for Democratic Strategist!)
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