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DUmmie FUnnies 10-13-06 (DUmmies Celebrate November Election Victory...In October)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | October 13, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 10/13/2006 3:46:36 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

It's all over folks. The Democrats have WON bigtime in the November congressional elections. All the polls keep telling us that and everyone knows that those pre-election polls are almost as accurate as election day exit polls. Kerry won in a landslide according to those exit polls so the Democrats must also win big according to only slightly less scientific polls. On top of that, the media pundits are telling us that the November elections have already been decided so you might as well not even vote in November. As a result, the DUmmies are already jubilantly celebrating their tremendous November election victory as you can see in this THREAD triumphantly titled, "BREAKING--New House polls show looming Democratic landslide." Never before have I seen so much gloating pre-election victory celebrations as I have seen this year. It wouldn't surprise me if Susan Estrich is already drunk as a skunk slurping down her victory champagne. So let us now watch the DUmmies celebrate their November victory in October in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, congratulating the DUmmies on their big win in the polls, is in the [brackets]:

BREAKING--New House polls show looming Democratic landslide

[WHEEE!!! I will break out the same bubbly that I drank to celebrate the Karl Rove indictment on May 12.]

Based on 63 polls of 48 districts of 1,000 likely voters each, they will show Democrats currently ahead in the House by 19 seats, 224-205, or the exact, 19-seat margin of the Republican Majority after the 2002 elections. It is also a significant increase from the 219-214 seat lead for Democrats found in the Majority Watch polling from late August and early September.

[Based on the 2004 exit polls we must always play Hail to the Chief whenever President Kerry enters the room.]

This 19-seat lead will not even include seven competitive, Republican-held districts that are currently being polled, and six districts that are currently tied. In fact, perhaps most stunningly, the districts with "safe" leads outside the margins of error break 217-198 in favor of Democrats. The previous set of polls actually showed Republicans ahead on safe seats, 205-199. Further, since TX-22 was not polled, that means Democrats already have the magic 218, outside the margin of error, with between 19 and 26 more races in the "toss-up" category. This is a looming landslide.

[A looming landslide is always so much better that an actual landslide. And now to hear from the celebrating DUmmies.]

Holy crap......I hope this holds.....

[Have no fear. These poll results are just as accurate as the 2004 exit poll results.]

oh those poor republicans thinking they would never-ever fall...

[We've failed, FAILED...in the polls.]

Everyone knows the polls can't be trusted ever since 2004. Trust Diebold. I love all this good news but I'm severely burned by election fraud and I have no faith that we can prevent it again. They'll do whatever they need to do to keep control of the houses. But I'll gratefully be wrong on this.

[Have no fear. It's a done deal. You can vote on November 8 confident that you are casting your ballot for winners.]

DON'T BELIEVE THESE POLLS! Please, please, don't. We need to fight like it is the last fight of our lives...because it may well be. There is another poll posted on DU tonight showing a Senate split of 49D, 49R and 2I...and if anyone thinks Joe is really I, they're nuts. He's as independent as McCain. Unless there is a twenty point lead, I'm not buying any of this shit. They'll still steal it, but I think now they're focusing on the much easier Senate steal...at least they can always get Cheney in to break all the ties for the GOP...if there ARE any ties, because we regularly have over a dozen traitors willing to suck off Bush every time.

[Relax, relax. You can believe these polls. It's all over. Enjoy your November victory in October. Why wait?]

I tend to agree with you...... As much as I don't trust it now, we ALL know anything can happen and elections can be rigged. But I get sooooooooooooooo tired of negativism and nay-saying. That gets me down more than the Rethugs do sometimes. It's true, we can't rely on polls too heavily, but it's nice to see that there's a little hope and it's nice to see that there are at least some Americans waking the hell up out of their comas. We need to keep working our asses off up through the elections, take a break, and then working them off again to get the Dems in line and prepare for '08. And you're right, it's paying off.

[You need to work your asses off, take a break, and then celebrate in this month.]

And pre-election polls three weeks before Election Day are not "tangible results"; they're nothing. The only tangible results people should be concerned about are those the day after Election Day.

[The only tangible results are what Diebold reports.]

Ok folks, time to stop working and caring, and go home!! This election is pretty much ours!

[That's the right spirit!]

I am absolutely scared shitless about some last minute dirty trick or the rotten macihnes taking this from us AGAIN

[Have no fear, little one. It's a DONE DEAL. Diebold will see to that.]

Even if we lose due to Diebold, We have the people with us. Our movement is growing.

[Wear your Guy Fawkes masks when stepping into the voting booths.]

Polls look good, but... Kerry's did, too. Not ready to pop any champagne just yet.

[No, no! Pop open that champagne now and CELEBRATE. You already won according to the polls.]

I'm SURE that most of the Repug money right now is being spent on organizing ways to prevent potential D voters to vote in Nov. ANY method they could think of.

[Dirty tricks like checking to see if the prospective voter is a citizen or isn't voting twice.]

This is great news, but remember that they could be f*cking with the polls, too. We still need to make sure EVERYONE goes out to vote, and make sure NO ONE says, ah, the Dems got it, I don't need to get out there and vote.

[Almost all the media pundits such as Chris Matthews are already saying, "Ah, the Dems got it." So no need for urgency. The pundits are NEVER wrong.]

Taking bets that the GOP will hold onto the Congress and Senate. Any takers? IMHO the election has already been decided. The voting machines are in place.

[ALL your Diebold machines belong to US!]

Good Lord, I can't wait for Nov 8th...

[Be sure to wake up bright and early and vote right away on Nov 8th.]

any bets there is a last minute republican landslide courtesy of Diebold

[Are you offering quinella, trifecta, and perfecta bets?]

If we "storm the Bastille" with votes, know we did, and they blithely nullify them and declare victory... will we... MUST we... storm the Bastille for real? Whatever that might mean.

[It means you need to check out the Dollar Stores for the post-Halloween Guy Fawkes costume sales.]

The question in their minds has to be is "by what percentage do we set the machines to flip the vote?".

[Three percent sounds like a good number but I could live with ten percent.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies; novemberelections
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The first real cold front of the season is due to pass thru here this weekend. I'll be looking forward to it.

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List.

1 posted on 10/13/2006 3:46:36 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


2 posted on 10/13/2006 3:47:48 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

1?


3 posted on 10/13/2006 3:47:50 AM PDT by Toby06
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To: PJ-Comix

Good morning.....ibtp....#3


4 posted on 10/13/2006 3:48:00 AM PDT by digger48
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To: digger48

Nope. You were IATP.


5 posted on 10/13/2006 3:48:50 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

hurray!!!


6 posted on 10/13/2006 3:50:24 AM PDT by Mercat (Show me what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman.)
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To: PJ-Comix

TOP 10!


7 posted on 10/13/2006 3:50:47 AM PDT by airborne (Gee Dub is 'Da Man!)
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To: PJ-Comix

Not enough coffee yet, I guess

gotta go...read it tonite


8 posted on 10/13/2006 3:51:26 AM PDT by digger48
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10 (pleeeeeeeeeze)!


9 posted on 10/13/2006 3:54:03 AM PDT by RedRover
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To: PJ-Comix

top ten...


10 posted on 10/13/2006 3:54:28 AM PDT by beezdotcom
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To: PJ-Comix
It is going to be fun to gloat after we "steal" another election.
11 posted on 10/13/2006 3:55:28 AM PDT by CzarNicky (Gentlemen, Dethklok has summoned a troll.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Trust Diebold.

Words to live by. ;')

12 posted on 10/13/2006 4:00:24 AM PDT by Rocko ("Ned Lamont doesn't know anything. You might as well vote for Michael Bolton." -- O'Reilly)
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To: PJ-Comix

They're probably just setting up "we was robbed" after they lose another election so they can have 1000's more Diebold threads.


13 posted on 10/13/2006 4:04:20 AM PDT by Dane ("Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall" Ronald Reagan, 1987)
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To: PJ-Comix
I am absolutely scared shitless about some last minute dirty trick or the rotten macihnes taking this from us AGAIN

Oddly most dirty tricks (October suprises) are from the Democrats and most fraud in elections are again associated with Democrats. But keep on believing.

14 posted on 10/13/2006 4:10:24 AM PDT by Always Right
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To: PJ-Comix

South Park yesterday and another excellent DUFU today. Thank you, PJ.

This "looming landslide" article was as frustrating to read as Cartman's 9-ll numbers conspiracy was to listen to. It is so poorly written - stating something in some district "will happen" -- I was hoping you would do something with it; it was impossible to get through it without a complete suspension of belief in the rules of grammar and syntax.

As always, thanks PJ.+


15 posted on 10/13/2006 4:20:40 AM PDT by Barset
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To: PJ-Comix
If we "storm the Bastille" with votes, know we did, and they blithely nullify them and declare victory... will we... MUST we... storm the Bastille for real? Whatever that might mean.

It's a good thing the public schools don't teach history anymore.

16 posted on 10/13/2006 4:29:03 AM PDT by steveegg (Let's make the deeply-saddened Head KOmmie deeply soddened in Nov. - deny the 'RATs the election)
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To: PJ-Comix
If we "storm the Bastille" with votes, know we did, and they blithely nullify them and declare victory... will we... MUST we... storm the Bastille for real?

Bwaaaah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! What a bunch of euroweenies. DU equivalent of "I know we actually won": "I voted Democrat, and every one of my friends voted Democrat, so the Repugs MUST have stolen the election. There can be no other possible explanation."

Election polls=Lucy with football

17 posted on 10/13/2006 4:41:55 AM PDT by shezza (God bless our military heroes)
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To: PJ-Comix

Thanks as always for the ping PJ.

35 degrees high atop Lookout Mountain at 7:45AM. Coldest yet.

I still think the picture of the crying (bawling) leftnut you included is the funniest I have ever seen. I often wonder if he/she/it has committed hari-kari yet?


18 posted on 10/13/2006 4:45:45 AM PDT by Chuck54 ( "It's NOT the economy stupid; that's great. It's the media".)
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To: PJ-Comix
DUmmies are at the top of the roller coaster again. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!


19 posted on 10/13/2006 4:53:17 AM PDT by Purrcival (Give it up, Dims. Congress has already been De-FOLEY-ated. He's gone. Repeat, gone.)
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To: steveegg

That "Whatever that might mean" part at the end had me laughing out loud. My wife thought came in to see what was up.


20 posted on 10/13/2006 5:01:27 AM PDT by trashcanbred (Anti-social and anti-socialist)
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To: PJ-Comix
Even if we lose due to Diebold, We have the people with us. Our movement is growing.

"GROWING"?

LOL! Fatuous words from the party that is extincting itself through massive abortion, euthanasia, and the fraud of gay marriage.

21 posted on 10/13/2006 5:05:06 AM PDT by JCEccles
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To: PJ-Comix
Ok folks, time to stop working and caring, and go home!! This election is pretty much ours!

I BELIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVE!

22 posted on 10/13/2006 5:19:47 AM PDT by NRA1995 (Clinton "tried", 3000 died)
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To: PJ-Comix

Freudenshad baby!

Top 25


23 posted on 10/13/2006 5:23:26 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (living in interesting times)
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To: JCEccles
"MOVEMENT" ?

BWHAHAHAHAHAH!

24 posted on 10/13/2006 5:25:20 AM PDT by freedomson (Tagline comment removed by moderator)
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To: PJ-Comix
I am absolutely scared shitless about some last minute dirty trick or the rotten macihnes taking this from us AGAIN

Rovenator II: Rise Of The Machines

25 posted on 10/13/2006 5:38:08 AM PDT by steve-b (It's hard to be religious when certain people don't get struck by lightning.)
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To: PJ-Comix
It wouldn't surprise me if Susan Estrich is already drunk as a skunk slurping down her victory champagne.

LOL! Doesn't the word "already" imply a time when she was not? As if that Carol Channing lisp could be attributed to some other source!

26 posted on 10/13/2006 5:38:44 AM PDT by COBOL2Java (Freedom isn't free, but the men and women of the military will pay most of your share)
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To: Barset
it was impossible to get through it without a complete suspension of belief in the rules of grammar and syntax

Not to mention the rules of logic and sanity, which in DUmmieland are not merely suspended but rather hung by the neck until they are dead, dead, dead.

27 posted on 10/13/2006 5:39:38 AM PDT by steve-b (It's hard to be religious when certain people don't get struck by lightning.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Any takers on massive riots on November 8th? Or will the DUmmies just whine about stolen elections that they can't seem to gather evidence of actually happening?

DIE-BOLD!

DIE-BOLD!

DIE-BOLD!


28 posted on 10/13/2006 5:41:38 AM PDT by Eagle of Liberty ("Thanks Bill Clinton. The gift that keeps on giving." - Glenn Beck)
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To: PJ-Comix

**Everyone knows the polls can't be trusted ever since 2004.**

Well, I would say everyone knows polls could never be trusted but clearly that's not the case...some people still believe them.


29 posted on 10/13/2006 5:48:43 AM PDT by ilovew (I love being a DoD intern...)
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To: freedomson
DUmmies are to "movement" what a bolus is to peristalsis.

{I thought it might be fun to cause the DUmmies to consult their Funk & Wagnalls)

30 posted on 10/13/2006 5:50:36 AM PDT by JCEccles
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To: CzarNicky
Yes, I've already got my bottle of Black Bush tucked away. It will be drunk, either as a celebratory drink (odds on favorite) or a consolation drink.

I mean, as long as there's Black Bush, how bad can the world be?
31 posted on 10/13/2006 5:56:10 AM PDT by chesley (Republicans don't serve to win...But America does not deserve the Dhimmicrats!)
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To: franksolich

WEHT franksolich? He seems to be MIA for awhile.


32 posted on 10/13/2006 5:57:11 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: NRA1995

My bet: A lousy freeper troll.


33 posted on 10/13/2006 5:57:33 AM PDT by chesley (Republicans don't serve to win...But America does not deserve the Dhimmicrats!)
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To: PJ-Comix

**The only tangible results people should be concerned about are those the day after Election Day.**

Well, that's true. Of course if things don't go their way, they're just gonna scream fraud anyway.


34 posted on 10/13/2006 6:09:41 AM PDT by ilovew (I love being a DoD intern...)
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To: PJ-Comix
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
35 posted on 10/13/2006 6:09:42 AM PDT by StrictTime (I used to be disgusted, now I try to be amused.)
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To: PJ-Comix
BREAKING--New House polls show looming Democratic landslide

Methinks the DUmmies may be headed for a November Surprise.

36 posted on 10/13/2006 6:13:31 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (DUmmies: Be sure to get out there and vote on November 8!)
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To: PJ-Comix

**Dirty tricks like checking to see if the prospective voter is a citizen or isn't voting twice**

Making sure there aren't lots of zombies voting...


37 posted on 10/13/2006 6:14:50 AM PDT by ilovew (I love being a DoD intern...)
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To: StrictTime

------Good Lord, I can't wait for Nov 8th...
[Be sure to wake up bright and early and vote right away on Nov 8th]------

Now that's a good one! No wonder they keep losing!!!


38 posted on 10/13/2006 6:16:01 AM PDT by queenkathy (The shampoo promised me extra body and I gained 3 pounds)
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To: PJ-Comix
This is a looming landslide.

But now let's see if some of the DUmmies can find a gloomy bad side. . . .

39 posted on 10/13/2006 6:18:03 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson ("gloomy bad side" = Diebold)
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To: steve-b

Absence of logic and sanity in Dummieland is a given, but you're right, it should be stated and re-stated. Thanks for the reminder.


40 posted on 10/13/2006 6:18:08 AM PDT by Barset
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To: PJ-Comix

**The question in their minds has to be is "by what percentage do we set the machines to flip the vote?".**

Percentage? I thought we were just gonna make em all change to Republican. Bush for Emperor 2008! :P


41 posted on 10/13/2006 6:20:07 AM PDT by ilovew (I love being a DoD intern...)
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To: PJ-Comix
Trust Diebold.

There's the gloomy bad side!

42 posted on 10/13/2006 6:21:20 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (In Diebold we trust.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I'm severely burned by election fraud

Someone with a bad case of Rove burns.

43 posted on 10/13/2006 6:23:57 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (The Rove sees all, knows all, controls all.)
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To: PJ-Comix
DON'T BELIEVE THESE POLLS!

I DON'T BELIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

44 posted on 10/13/2006 6:26:20 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (In Polls we trust.)
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To: Kerretarded

Live free or Die Bold

LOL


45 posted on 10/13/2006 6:27:54 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (living in interesting times)
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To: PJ-Comix
Ok folks, time to stop working and caring, and go home!!

No more need for those tiring LTTEs and DUmmieland strategy sessions! Activism can be so exhausting! Now you can go lie on the sofa-bed with a bucket of caramel corn and pop in "V For Vendetta"!

46 posted on 10/13/2006 6:38:36 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (DUmmie slacktivism.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I am absolutely scared shitless. . . .

The ol' DUmmieland "Language of Fear" kicks in. . . .

47 posted on 10/13/2006 6:41:57 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Fear and hatred, the two constants in DUmmieland moods.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Even if we lose due to Diebold, We have the people with us. Our movement is growing.

This is a looming revolution.

48 posted on 10/13/2006 6:43:47 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (The DUmmies are revolting!)
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To: PJ-Comix
Good Lord, I can't wait for Nov 8th...

ELECTION DAY! Get out there and VOTE on November 8!

The Day When Everything Finally Changed!

49 posted on 10/13/2006 6:48:34 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (DUmmies, be sure to get out there and VOTE on November 8! Tell your friends!)
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To: PJ-Comix
any bets there is a last minute republican landslide courtesy of Diebold

This is a dooming landslide.

50 posted on 10/13/2006 6:51:20 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (In Diebold we trust.)
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