DUmmie FUnnies 06-09-08 ("Is Obama an enlightened being?")

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | June 9, 2008 | Mark Morford, DUmmies, and PJ-Comix

[PJ-Comix]

Mark Morford: Is Obama an enlightened being?

Spiritual wise ones say: This sure ain't no ordinary politician. You buying it?

I find I'm having this discussion, this weird little debate, more and more, with colleagues, with readers, with liberals and moderates and miserable, deeply depressed Republicans and spiritually amped persons of all shapes and stripes and I'm having it in particular with those who seem confused, angry, unsure, thoroughly nonplussed, as they all ask me the same thing: What the hell's the big deal about Obama?

[PJ-Comix]

Right now I am seeing if it is worth it to write for Helium.Com. So far I have earned a whopping 9 cents for my political satire posted yesterday. However, right now my marketplace article is rated #1 out of 4 so I can earn 20 bucks for it if the publisher chooses it. The article only took me an hour to write. I can write five articles per day and some of the articles pay over a hundred bucks. Just waiting to see how this works out before proceeding further.

Now back to The Matrix to worship The One as my personal Lightworker...

[Phantom Lord]

In before ping?

[Phantom Lord]

Yes! Bow you lesser posters!

[PJ-Comix]

PING!

[JRios1968]

Top 10!!! Now I can read it

[EggsAckley]

“Many spiritually advanced people I know....”

People like this don’t have a clue what a “spiritually advanced” person is. Bunch of new-age swill.

[Larry Lucido]

Bump

[freedomlover]

INBF 10

[mikrofon]

what Obama has, which is a sort of powerful luminosity, a unique high-vibration integrity

Or that treacle-up-the-leg feeling...

[MrB]

People who claim to be “spiritual” seek the Goodness of the Creator,

but avoid any of the accompanying requirement to change behaviors in order to be in alignment with the Goodness.

[Charles Henrickson]

Is Obama an enlightened being?

Are you saying he's not black enough?

[Charles Henrickson]

Is Obama an enlightened being?

Obama is a lightweight being.

[L.N. Smithee]

See, whenever you scratch someone who derides people who aren't afraid to be Christian in public as wackjobs, you find someone maybe non- or anti-religious, but a wackjob nonetheless.

I get the feeling Moronford had trouble even writing this because he realized how evangelical he felt despite being an atheist. Well, what people who hate religion don't seem to realize is that everyone is evangelical about something and assigns it religious status, even if that something is atheism. And Moronford has found his Messiah - emphasis on the "Mess."

[Charles Henrickson]

Spiritual wise ones say: This sure ain't no ordinary politician. You buying it?

Some are:

HELLO DADDY, HELLO MAMA (A Letter from Camp Obama)
Tune: "Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh (A Letter from Camp)" Original

Hello Daddy
Hello Mama
Here I am at
Camp Obama
Camp's as pretty
As a painting
And they say we'll have some fun if we stop fainting

Our Barack has
Gifts of healing
Stevie Wonder's
Out four-wheeling
I met Oprah
Over dinner
Since she's been here she's got thirteen inches thinner

All the campers
Drink the Kool-Aid
That the counselors
At the school made
This is change we
Can believe in
'Cause the campers who come in here won't be leavin'

Now I just thought
I should buy ya
A small bust of
Our Messiah
You can put it
On your dashboard
It will guide and guard your car so it won't crash more

Yes we can!
Oh Daddy, Mama!
Yes we can!
I love Obama!
Don't tell me
I ought to find out facts
Of how
He plans to spend and tax

Yes we can!
I promise he will
Heal the holes
That cause the problems
In our souls
Oh please don't make me say
Just how--
He'll find a way

Got to stop now
Looks like we're through
Camp Obama
Has a curfew
Every day it's
Early rising
After "Washing of the Brains" it's "Plagiarizing"

Wait a minute
What's this gabbin'
Two new campers
In our cabin
See their nametags
Read the printin'
Seems the campers' names are Bill and Chelsea Clinton!

[MrB]

Everyone has the “God shaped vacuum” in their being.

And if you don’t fill it with God, you’re going to fill it with something.

The reason that they don’t want to fill it with God is that this requires some accountability on their part once they do.

[Charles Henrickson]

What the hell's the big deal about Obama?

White Guilt non-thinkers swooning at the thought of a non-threatening, clean and articulate, Magic Negro *they* can be enlightened enough to support.

[kalee]

roflol one ofo the all time best!

[mnehring]

to say it's just a clever marketing ploy, a slick gambit carefully orchestrated by hotshot campaign organizers

These people should really read up on Neuro-Linguistic Programming and then watch an Obama speech. It is a very carefully orchestrated marketing scheme.

[Charles Henrickson]

what Obama has, which is a sort of powerful luminosity, a unique high-vibration integrity.

V For Vibration.

[A_perfect_lady]

Cult of Personality: see Hitler, Mussolini, Mao, Stalin

[Charles Henrickson]

Here's where it gets gooey.

I can feel the gooey stuff I'm stepping in.

[mnehring]

The Milton Model of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (marketing folks love this).

(snip) Milton model Main article: Milton model
In contrast to the Meta Model of NLP which specifies information, is the Milton Erickson-inspired Milton model described by Bandler and Grinder as "artfully vague"[28]. In it the communicator makes statements that seem specific but allow the listener to fill in their own meaning for what is being said. It makes use of pacing and leading, ambiguity, metaphor, embedded suggestion, and multiple-meaning sentence structures. It has been described as "a way of using language to induce and maintain trance in order to contact the hidden resources of our personality".[29] The Milton model has three primary aspects: First, to assist in building and maintaining rapport with the client. Second, to overload and distract the conscious mind so that unconscious communication can be cultivated. Third, to allow for interpretation in the words offered to the client.[30]

After spending months closely studying Erickson's language (verbal and non-verbal) and imitating the way that Erickson worked with clients, Bandler and Grinder published the Milton model in 1976/1977 under the title The Patterns of Milton H. Erickson Volumes I & II[13]. In the preface, Erickson said, "Although this book [...] is far from being a complete description of my methodologies, as they so clearly state it is a much better explanation of how I work than I, myself, can give. I know what I do, but to explain how I do it is much too difficult for me."[13] Erickson was known for his use of unconventional approaches, including the use of stories, and for deeply entering the world of his clients. The Milton model is a way of communicating based on the hypnotic language patterns of Milton Erickson.[31]

[bcsco]

Here's where it gets gooey. Many spiritually advanced people I know (not coweringly religious, mind you, but deeply spiritual) identify Obama as a Lightworker, that rare kind of attuned being who has the ability to lead us not merely to new foreign policies or health care plans or whatnot, but who can actually help usher in a new way of being on the planet, of relating and connecting and engaging with this bizarre earthly experiment. These kinds of people actually help us evolve. They are philosophers and peacemakers of a very high order, and they speak not just to reason or emotion, but to the soul.

But (a BIG but) they're just people, folks. And Christianity isn't about worshiping "people". We have a higher calling...

BTW, Pastor, this is one of your best efforts.

[chesley]

I was wondering if you were going to DUFU this. Glad to see you did.

These are some seriously screwed up people on the way to Hell, in the here and the hereafter.

America is on the way of Sodom & Gomorrah if these people take charge, and I don't mean just about the gay thing. Everything they believe is so wrong.

Of course, the Lord would have spared S & G for the sake of ten righteous men, and there are considerably more than that is America. On the other hand, what are the relative proportions? I just saying, God would probably have spared them for the sake of one righteous man if Abraham had asked. But he didn't.

[Charles Henrickson]

Many spiritually advanced people I know (not coweringly religious, mind you, but deeply spiritual)

Typical non-Christian, anti-Christian drivel: Pitting "spiritual" against "religious," claiming you can be spiritual without being religious--indeed, the really spiritual people are *not* religious (i.e., they don't attend a Christian church). Hogwash.

[Girlene]

But there simply is no denying that extra kick. As one reader put it to me, in a way, it's not even about Obama, per se. There's a vast amount of positive energy swirling about that's been held back by the armies of BushCo darkness, and this energy has now found a conduit, a lightning rod, is now effortlessly self-organizing around Obama's candidacy.

I think these posters are on drugs.

[LonePalm]

The DUmmies don't respect the Second Amendment, and only respect the First when it suits them.

Why should they respect the First or Second Commandments?

Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

[bcsco]

Typical non-Christian, anti-Christian drivel: Pitting "spiritual" against "religious," claiming you can be spiritual without being religious--indeed, the really spiritual people are *not* religious (i.e., they don't attend a Christian church). Hogwash.

Well, here we are in the Last Days, and getting insight into the thinking of those destined for destruction. Pretty grim, really. But, not everyone is meant to be saved.

[bcsco]

I think these posters are on drugs.

Well, whatever could it be that gave you that idea?

[Charles Henrickson]

Obama as a Lightworker, that rare kind of attuned being. . . .

Save us with your Lightsaber, Obama-Wan Kenobi!

[Charles Henrickson]

Are you rolling your eyes and scoffing?

No, not at all.

I'm WIPING my eyes from the tears of laughter streaming down my face as I read this pile of poppycock.

[JamesP81]

Dismiss it all you like, but I've heard from far too many enormously smart, wise, spiritually attuned people who've been intuitively blown away by Obama's presence

I saw some shows on the History Channel where they interviewed some people who knew Hitler. They said much the same things about him.

[LonePalm]

I have been saying this for months. Obama is more highly evolved than any politician I have seen.

So, this DUmmie is calling the Obamessiah a mutant?

That is how evolution is supposed to work, right? One mutation at a time.

I always thought of politicians as a lower life form anyway. Maybe, after a few hundred thousand generations, they might mutate in to a more desirable life form like an insurance salesman or a telemarketer.

Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

[Always Right]

From what I've seen of both men, I conclude that Obama is a much more enlightened person than the Dalai Lama.

Like debating who is more enlightened, Marx or Stalin?

[Sacajaweau]

You got it....

[Charles Henrickson]

The Kennedy family is our version of royalty.

The Dukes of Drunk Driving and Adultery.

[Charles Henrickson]

an even larger and more fascinating evolutionary burp. . . .

Larger than a Kennedy burp after a night of carousing?

[doug from upland]

Skip to comments.DFU SONG: Peaceful Easy Feeling (Chris Matthews gets a thrill up his leg over Obama)
DFU News of the Day in Song ^ | 4-17-08 | Lyrics, Doug from Upland

Posted on 04/17/2008 8:37:25 AM PDT by doug from upland

WATCH CHRISSY MATTHEWS PROFESS HIS LOVE (OR LUST) FOR OBAMA

"It's part of reporting this case, this election, the feeling most people get when they hear Barack Obama's speech. My, I felt this thrill going up my leg. I mean, I don't have that too often."

MIDI - PEACEFUL EASY FEELING (No. 140)

[Charles Henrickson]

a big global group hug with Obama as some sort of happy hippie camp counselor.

Welcome to Camp Obama. Non-competitive volleyball in five minutes, people!

[JamesP81]

People who claim to be “spiritual” seek the Goodness of the Creator, but avoid any of the accompanying requirement to change behaviors in order to be in alignment with the Goodness.

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! 2 Timothy 3:1-5

[Charles Henrickson]

the man's going to swoop in like a superhero messiah. . . .

Straight from Metrosexualopolis!

[Charles Henrickson]

and stop all wars and make the flowers grow and birds sing and solve world hunger and bring puppies to schoolchildren.

And evening and morning were the third day. . . .

[JamesP81]

I think these posters are on drugs.

Morford is using a lot of New Age lingo in his column. Madame Blavatsky would be proud.

[Charles Henrickson]

While Obama's certainly an entire universe away from George W. Bush in terms of quality, integrity, intelligence and overall inspirational energy, well, so is your dog.

I would sooner vote for my dog than for Barack Obama. The worst my dog will do is poop on the Oval Office rug.

[Charles Henrickson]

There's a vast amount of positive energy swirling about. . . .

Spontaneous levitation, even.

[hoagy62]

Oh good Lord....

I’m beginning to wonder (this is coming from my own Christian perspective and should not be taken as something all Christians are thinking) if Obama is the “president we deserve”. I’ll ‘splain...

For the last 40 years, we as a nation have been moving farther and farther away from Christian principles. As long as we kept God close (or reasonably close) to the central focus of our nation, we’ve done okay. We as a nation stood for what was right and good, and we held our belief in God as a “torch” for the world to see.

Now, we’re getting into the ‘one world’ thing, people (but not everyone) are forgetting God or the principles He set forth. The majority of the nation really doesn’t give a rip about God, or church, or even living a principled life. They want what they want, when they want it, and they want it NOW, without having to put too much effort into it...especially the younger folks.

Obama appeals to their way of thinking. “Hope” instead of hard work. “Embracing new ways” instead of standing for what is right. “Opening dialogue” with our enemies instead of taking a firm stand and being willing to back it up.

I think God has decided (and far be it from from me to actually attempt to interpret what God may be saying, but...) that if we want that kind of leader, that’s what we’ll get, and America won’t be the ‘beacon to the world’ it once was. I really believe this may be setting up for the End of Days, whenever that may occur.

Can we pull out of our national nose-dive into this mess? Yes...but I see NO leader in the national spotlight who might be able to rally the people and get them on the correct track back to where we need to be.

I have HOPE, but my HOPE is aimed a little higher up than Mr. Obama.

[bcsco]

[Charles Henrickson]

Think that's all a bunch of tofu-sucking New Agey bulls-- and Obama is really a dangerously elitist political salesman whose inexperience will lead us further into darkness. . . ?

Yes! And not just his inexperience, there's so much more! The socialism, the racism, the wrongheadedness on so many issues. . . .

[Admin Moderator]

All material from San Francisco Chronicle has to be excerpted.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1111944/posts

[Charles Henrickson]

He's something very, very special, this little boy the world tossed us.

He doesn't even need training wheels any more! What a BIG boy!