Budweiser Plans Immediate Change In Brew

Elective Decisions ^ | July 22, 2008 | Chris Davis

[writer33]

St. Louis—In what could be the biggest disaster since Hurricane Katrina, Budweiser—after being sold to Belgian based InBev—has immediately plans to change the formulation for their beer. The change comes to reflect a European style of beer, giving it a more “fruitier and nuttier taste,” a veritable Bud “spritzer.”

The beer, known to the common working class man, will now appeal to the most erudite of Americans. The “King Of Beers” will indeed have a flavor made for a king, flushing years of perfection down the toilet.

[writer33]

SATIRE

[writer33]

Satire ping!

[SouthTexas]

You were awful nice on this one. Ya shoulda seen the Nascar thread. LOL

[writer33]

I would’ve like to have seen it.

[SouthTexas]

I just posted your link on that thread. :)

[writer33]

Thanks for posting the link. I do appreciate it, ST.

[smoothsailing]

OK, that's it! I'm switching and buying a Boombox too!

[Hoplite]

Budweiser?

<Expletive deleted> Budweiser.

Pabst Blue... I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore.

[writer33]

Buy me one of those too while you’re at it. Thanks for reading, smoothsailing. I appreciate it.

[writer33]

Thanks for the post, Hoplite. I do appreciate it.

[REDWOOD99]

“The new owners have been floating names such as ‘Morning Dew,’ or ‘Bouquet de Bud.’ This will be as good for America as Anthony Kennedy has been for the Supreme Court.”

Classic!!

[writer33]

Glad you enjoyed it, thanks for reading.

[o_zarkman44]

I realize this is satire. but I have been considering seeking out an “American” brew alternative like Sam Adams or Boulevard.
Truth is, it is getting hard to find anything owned, or made in America. Our nation’s assets and traditional businesses are being bought out by foreigners. And with those traditions goes our core foundation that made America great.

[writer33]

And with those traditions goes our core foundation that made America great.

Agreed.

[smoothsailing]

You got it, buddy!

Frost Brewed and Real Smooth! ;-)

[writer33]

:-)

[hosepipe]

No kidding... many new Coor's drinkers..
Wont kill all sales.. but will dent them..

[writer33]

Probably.

[RebelTex]

Shiner Bock

http://www.shiner.com/about/about.php

About the Brewery
As the oldest independent brewery in Texas, the Spoetzl Brewery has been brewing up Shiner beer since 1909. Tours are available in which patrons can sample a variety of our brews: Bock, Blonde, Hefeweizen, Light, Bohemian Black Lager, Shiner 99, or the brand new summer seasonal, Spezial Leicht. The Brewery is also open to the public for free tours. Click

http://www.shiner.com/tour2/tour-home.html

to take a virtual tour of our Brewery.

[Recovering_Democrat]

I was going to say....WHOA WAIT A MINUTE....I clicked, hoping to see “SATIRE”. Thanks for the clarification! :)

[bmwcyle]

Too bad, Bud sucks as is.

[E.G.C.]

BTTT

[Libloather]

From JR at the link above -

"That’s ridiculous these article. Who wrote this ridiculous article has anything to do. Go home, go to work, produce something util."

Give that guy another beer! I have to agree. Who sits around dreaming up this kinda stuff?

[TonyRo76]

I understand the Cardinals will get new uniforms too...

[lormand]

I wish it were not satire

[Non-Sequitur]

The “King Of Beers” will indeed have a flavor made for a king, flushing years of perfection down the toilet.

If you stop and think about it, sooner or later the King of Beers winds up getting flushed down the toilet anyway.

[lormand]

The hefe is a big disappointment, but it is marketed as “american style hefeweizen”. In my experience, anything labeled “american style” regarding beer will result in a watered down taste.

[TexasGunLover]

flushing years of perfection down the toilet.

If bud is beer perfection, I'd hate to think what they think a bad beer tastes like. There is nothing worse out there than Bud products, from a taste and quality standpoint...

[TexasGunLover]

Shiner Bock

Indeed, true craftsmanship... the new Shiner Black is amazing... I really can't stand to drink any beer other than Shiner Bock or their new Black...

[IamConservative]

The Bud w/ Clamato is interesting. I find myself buying it frequently. Some call it a Red Rooster or Red Eye. I’ll have to say it is darn good for breakfast if you find yourself fishing with the boys..

I drink V-8 juice for breakfast and like pretty much all kinds of tomato juices and cocktails. Not sure the Bud Clamato would suit others if you don’t like tomato juice to start with.

[the_devils_advocate_666]

[skinkinthegrass]

bottoms up!...what will it taste like....*smirking* :D

[Biblebelter]

This may be satire but they have already went fruity with the lime business.

[b4its2late]

LOL, with a grain of truth no doubt.

[boogerbear]

There’s tons of excellent beers made in America, there’s a big block of excellent brewers in the Denver area (New Belgium, Flying Dog, and Avery head that list). Of course dozens if not hundreds in the Pacific Northwest. Quite a few in Texas. They’re all over.

And of course Bud will still be made in America. Part of that purchase includes a dozen breweries, breweries that were making Bud and numerous “foreign” beers including Stella Artois the flagship beer of the company that’s buying AB.

[Lee'sGhost]

If it wasn’t obvious early on, it certainly became obvious that it was satire when you got to this part.

“The “King Of Beers” will indeed have a flavor made for a king, flushing years of perfection down the toilet.”

Perfection....
bwahahahahahahahahahaha...

[Dead Corpse]

Too bad. If they actually added some taste back in, that would be a good thing.

[SierraWasp]

I think if’n yer gonna write satire about Budwiser, maybe you better add FReeper “budwiesest” to your ping list... Ya think? (grin)

[TexasRepublic]

The “King Of Beers” will indeed have a flavor made for a king, flushing years of perfection down the toilet.

Odd, I thought the toilet is where it originated.

[Dinsdale]

It can only make it better.

BTW Bud is not only not ‘The King of Beers’ it is not beer at all.

Beer is made from water, malted barley, hops, yeast and NOTHING ELSE.

The rice in Bud makes it a malt beverage, same as ‘Zima’.

[Dinsdale]

The best thing Coors makes is their non-alcoholic 'beer'.

It's not good, but it's the best thing they make.

Coors Light=Poor mans Perrier.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

The “King Of Beers” will indeed have a flavor made for a king, flushing years of perfection down the toilet.

As opposed to down the urinal as is usually is. :)

[smoothsailing]

I'm not much of a beer drinker, so when I drink a beer I just want one that doesn't fill me up, taste bad, or give me a headache. Coors Light satisfies those conditions IMO. I'd rather just have a limeade, but sometimes socially I'll have a beer.

[Libloather]

Beer is made from water, malted barley, hops, yeast and NOTHING ELSE.

Maybe in Germany but not in St. Louis. What, you didn't know?

Budweiser is made with a proportion of rice in addition to barley malt, for which it has received some criticism, though the company takes the position that the rice gives the beer a lighter taste.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budweiser_(Anheuser-Busch)

[writer33]

Who sits around dreaming up this kinda stuff?

A bunch of wack jobs obviously. :-)

[writer33]

Perfect graphic, TR. Thanks for reading and posting. I do appreciate it.

[writer33]

I wish it were not satire

Well, maybe you'll get lucky.

[writer33]

If you stop and think about it, sooner or later the King of Beers winds up getting flushed down the toilet anyway.

It does ideed, Non-Sequitur. Thanks for reading and pointing that out. I appreciate it. Definitely adds to the thread.

[writer33]

Thanks for posting the graphic, tda666, it’s perfect for the satire.

[writer33]

Thanks for reading, skink. I do appreciate it. Hope the fruit ain’t too bad. :-)