Posted on 08/05/2008 11:24:53 AM PDT by reaganaut1
Well what about having a good two???
i use “its not a problem” or other variants of it when stupid customers bring their children, who make ungodly messes all over my tables and floors, then half heartedly pretend to clean it up and apologize profusely for it.
i can’t very well say “you idiot, this i my job, its what i do. i’m here to clean up after you and your child that just spilt his fifth cup of milk, and its quite obvious why you’re out to eat, because you are obviously sick of cleaning up after him and are completely incapable of teaching him and ettiquite or manners. now quit apologizing. if you want to show your appreciation for me cleaning this up, leave a decent tip, and next time, don’t bring your kids into a BAR!”
Eh. Even the Ritz Carlton gave up on the mandatory "my pleasures." Different generations view things differently. Younger people don't care about that sort of stuff.
English is one of the five languages I’ve attempted to learn in my lifetime (You’re failing English? How can you be failing English, it’s your mother tongue?). It is the only one that I recall uses anything as formal as “You’re welcome.” Really, it makes no sense, you are welcome to what? German and Russian use “please” as the response to “thank you.” Spanish is de nada (it was nothing). Many other languages use a vairation on these two, rather than a variation on “You’re welcome.”
I think you folks are over-analyzing this. There may be a very, very small percentage of people who actually mean, "no problem," as you describe it, but I suspect most people use it as an ingrained response they picked up at home and use it as a term of comfortable familiarity. Certainly there may be some very formal settings where it's inappropriate and one would expect a more dignified response, but in a fast food restaurant and most retail stores, I doubt that most employees use it as a term of condescension.
I will frequently be discussing an assignment or request from a Client and may answer, "That won't be a problem," and I suspect the Client receives it as I intend it...simply, "I don't foresee any problems or difficulties in providing what you've asked for." Because I work in an industry that provides fairly specialized services, many of our Clients' inquiries are not only requests for work they'd like done, but also informal requests for feasibility. They rely on us not only as the service provider, but as technical advisor and many requests have an implied question regarding the feasibility and any difficulties that we might foresee in providing what they want. If I do foresee a problem, delay, roadblock or can provide a recommendation as to a better, more efficient manner in which they might achieve the end they're looking for, I'll let them know. If I don't, I'll tell them, "that won't be a problem," which answers several of their questions at once.
As with most reflexive responses I'd offer that the tone and context mean far more than the simple words.
In Spanish, the expected response to "Gracias" is "De nada" or "Por nada" - which essentially means "It was nothing"; not than "bienvenido" which means "welcome".
In French, if you say "Merci beaucoup" a French person will respond "ne rien" rather than "bienvenu" also meaning "it was nothing" as opposed to "welcome". Other languages have similar responses.
Linguistically, the response "no problem" is much closer to the polite and expected response across numerous cultures and languages than "you're welcome" is. The initial statement that if you have time to get upset over "no problem" as a response to "thank you" you must have a pretty good life was a tremendous understatement. And don't bother to thank me; it was no problem.
‘This is a huge pet peeve of mine. IMO, the only proper response to “Thank you” is “You’re welcome”, not “No problem”.’
I think the British often reply to “thank you” with “thank you”, which is ok with me.
The waiter or waitress who gushes with the over friendly “how’re we doin’ here?”, really gets my goat. Many times they ask before I’ve taken a bite of food. GRRR!
The best waiter I ever had was in Charleston, SC...he was there every time we needed something, but I never saw him hanging around. At the proper time, he came to our table and sincerely inquired, “How does the food taste, sir?”
It still brings tears to my eyes.
My personal pet peeve: cashiers who place coins on top of bills when returning change. I can’t count the number of times I’ve dropped coins when trying to juggle the merchandise and the change when they do this.
I like George Carlin’s response: “I already have a good one. I’m looking for a bigger one.”
Ah! Thank you! It’s one of my two absolute pet peeves WRT waiters/waitresses! The other one is when they address me, my very distinguished looking father and our great and equally distinguished friend as “Guys” -as in, “Hi guys, can I startcha off with some skins?” “Thanks, guys! See ya next time!”, etc. If I knew the person or was a regular, it MIGHT be acceptable. Go ahead, call me an old curmudgeon, but doggone it, I’m NOT your peer, young lady/young man serving me iced tea.
grumblegrumblegrumble...
Colonel, USAFR
Example #1: “I was hesitant to believe what she was saying, but her adamance finally convinced me.
Example #2: ‘I was like “No way!” and she was like “Yeah Way!”, and I'm like “Nuhh-Ahhhh!”, and she's like “YEAH!”, and I was like “NOT”, and she was like “For Real!", and I was like “OK, but woah!”!
My pet peeve is people who want others to be polite to them, but then get worked up when that politeness is not demonstrated in the *exact way* they prefer.
Okay, the chuckle started at line 2 and became a full-fledged guffaw by the time I got to “BAR”! Thanks!
Yeah, that’s one for me also. As far as I can tell, it just started “happening,” and cashiers (with lack of guidance otherwise) began to consider it “customary.”
I don’t know, I have to go with the Rush response on this one: “Words mean things” - and the Marshall MacCluhan maxim that “The medium is the message and the message is the medium”.
i.e., if you want to be taken seriously, speak seriously. If you want to be respected, dress, behave and speak in a manner that invites respect. Pretty simple, really.
I have learned a very valuable lesson from this thread. Most of you don't deserve to be communicated with.
Why say “Thank you” to someone who is merely doing their job?
Because manners cost nothing.
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