what should the POTUS say to all?
"Did I do that?"
Posted on 07/24/2009 8:39:18 AM PDT by Notoriously Conservative
There are no really good Obama jokes out there, they are just too hard to find. I would like to have some funny ones to post on my site (notoriouslyconservative.com), so please share your best jokes. No racist ones though, we don't want the thread shut down.
Q: How is God like Barack Obama?
A: God doesn’t believe in Barack Obama either.
Q: What is the difference between God and Barack Obama?
A: God doesn’t think he’s Barack Obama.
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President Barack Hussein Obama = A Democrat speaks inane rubbish
A: The Che-Guevera t-shirt was still in the laundry...
Q. Why doesn’t Barack drink Pepsi?
A. He thinks that things go better with coke.
Barack Obama was seated next to a little girl on an airplane trip back to Washington. He turned to her and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”
The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to The Obama, “What would you like to talk about?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” said the Obama. “How about What Changes I Should Make To America?” and he smiles.
“OK,” she says. “That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?”
Obama, visibly surprised by the little girl’s intelligence, thinks about it for a second and finally says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.”
To which the little girl replies, “Do you really feel qualified to change America when you don’t know shit?
Bill Clinton said, “I didn’t inhale.”
Barack Obama says, “I didn’t inject.”
Richard Nixon said “I am not a crook!”
Barack Obama says “I am not on crack!”
Harry Truman said, “The buck stops here!”
Barack Obama says, “Leave the bucks here!”
These are pretty good, keep em coming!
I see that more as a nightmare. I hope I wake up soon.
I have a hard time being comical when I’m watching the intentional demise of our Republic going down in flames...
A: God doesn't have a birth certificate either.
Pope Benedict, Mahmoud Ahmedinejad and Barack Obama are all taken up to heaven, where they stand before God’s throne.
God tells them, “You three are among the most influential men on the earth, so I have chosen you to deliver My message. I am disgusted with what the world has become, so I will destroy it in two weeks. Relay My message to everyone on the earth so they may make themselves ready.”
The Pope calls an audience at the Vatican which is televised throughout Europe. He says, “My fellow Christians, I have some good news and bad news. The good news is, our God is real; I have seen Him with my own eyes. The bad news is, He is going to destroy the earth in two weeks, so get your affairs in order before His coming.”
Ahmedinejad calls a press conference which appears on all the Arab news outlets: “My fellow Islamic holy warriors, I have bad news and worse news. The bad news is that there is a God, but it is the God of the infidel Christians. The worse news is that he is destroying the earth in two weeks.”
Barack Obama calls a press conference which is carried by all the major networks (except Fox, of course; they want to earn a profit): “My fellow Americans, I have good news and great news. The good news is, God considers me one of the most influential people in the world. The great news is, we no longer have to worry about how we pay for universal healthcare.”
Woops to real to be a joke....
“I see that more as a nightmare. I hope I wake up soon. “
A nightmare, a joke; I’m not sure where the dividing line is...
Yeah, right.
Barack Obama -vs- An Intelligent Little Girl
Barack Obama was seated next to a little girl on an airplane trip back to Washington. He turned to her and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”
The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to The Obama, “What would you like to talk about?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” said the Obama. “How about What Changes I Should Make To America?” and he smiles.
“OK,” she says. “That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?”
Obama, visibly surprised by the little girl’s intelligence, thinks about it for a second and finally says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.”
To which the little girl replies, “Do you really feel qualified to change America when you don’t know shit?”
But there are already over 1.6 trillion Omaba jokes about his health care deform policies!
Best of the lot...LOL
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