Homeland Jan sez: "The system worked!"
Posted on 12/27/2009 7:18:56 PM PST by Charles Henrickson
Homeland Jan sez: "The system worked!"
So in the wake of the terrorists running amok again, there's talk of new rules requiring passengers to stay seated during the last hour of the flight. This could cause some problems, though, for passengers with . . . let's say, a certain pressing need to get up and go. Things are all wee-wee'd up! The ineptitude of Team Incompetent is affecting the incontinent! And the DUmmies are not pleased, as we see in this THREAD, "I cannot stay in my seat the final hour before a flight lands!"
So fasten your seat belt, stow your tray, and put your seat in an upright position, as we encounter some DUmmie turbulence, in Threat Level Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering if he will have to lay off the ginger ale the next time he flies, is in the [brackets]:
I cannot stay in my seat the final hour before a flight lands!
[Yes we can!]
There is no way I can hold my bladder that long. . . .
[Hope and change!]
So what do they expect with this silly rule. Pee my pants?
[Listen, Hillary, Ol' Crusty has been through a lot. I'm sure she can handle that.]
I'll bet it enough people really did pee in their pants this rule would end damn quick. Perhaps an organized "Pee In" is in order here.
[Call the NAAPP.]
I am seriously thinking I need a note from my doctor.
[Six months, minimum, under Obamacare.]
I would also have a problem with the last hour and not being able to pee. Sometimes I have to go every 15 minutes. And being nervous doesn't help. Not to mention having IBS.
[Irritable Bolshevik Syndrome.]
I think maybe something more than a "pee in" is needed here. There should also be a "sh*t in." A whole planeload of people sitting in their own sh*ts smelling the place up.
[DUAC! DUAC!]
All of the things this guy did could have been accomplished mid flight. Just because it happened shortly before landing isn't justification for changing onboard bathroom procedures.
[OK, no bathroom breaks AT ALL, the whole flight!]
Of course it does not stop the neo nazi thugs jumping on the bandwagon of racial profile all Muslims.
[Yeah, just a coincidence that 100% of these terrorist airplane guys are Muslims, I guess. We really need to be concerned about the radical Lutherans and their exploding lutefisk.]
Visualize swirled pees!
[You win the Nobel Piss Prize!]
I think this new rule is just for international flights . . .
[On Incontinental Airlines.]
I hope people on planes all sh*t their pants in unison. one two three CRAP. that might change things.
[Crap and Trade . . . Underwear.]
This has nothing to do with President Obama.
[Piss be upon him.]
we're dealing with a bureaucracy that thinks it has to do something after every incident, whether what they do makes any sense or not. The reality is that this man should never have been allowed to board a plane bound for the USA. . . . Barn door closing regulations that don't address that are the feeble hand-waving of some Peter Principled bureaucrat who can't think of anything else to do.
[We'd send you a Kewpie Doll, but new regulations prohibit the shipment of Kewpie-like materials.]
I do believe that Obama has a responsibility to start leaning on DHS to stop oppressing civilians who are just trying to get to Grandma's for the holidays.
[Throw Grandma under the bus and you don't have to worry about it.]
Frankly, President Obama has had a lot on his plate in 2009.
[Don't expect him to have time for national security.]
What's next? Will they make everyone fly naked?
[Be thankful the DUmmies don't fly much.]
As for us.give us the liberty to pee or we chose not to fly.
[DON'T TREAD ON PEE!]
I just hope they use warm KY Jelly on their latex gloves for those body cavity probes. . . .
[Calm down, benburch, calm down!]
what if people go through those body scanners and they've got a bit of constipation and the screen shows something strange in the lower abdominal area (an impacted stool). . . . Forced enemas?
[With wands like these, who needs enemas?]
If enough people leave behind a "puddle", the policy will change back very quickly. Think of it as a form of protest.
[All we are saying . . . is give pee a chance!]
Diapers. . . .
[benburch is in heaven!]
ever hear of depends undergarments...?
[Change we can relieve in.]
wear crappy, comfortable clothes and piss in their seat.
[OK, the DUmmies already DO this. So what NEW do you suggest?]
Whip it out and let it fly in the aisle.
[The system that works!]
In before the ping.
Depends.
PING!
In before the peeing.
Top 10?
We conservatives will never bow down to the government attempts to control us by making us fearful. We will never side with attempts to micromanage our every move, or submit to decreased liberty for the sake of more security.
Unless we get to mock Democrats, in which case, we’re right behind it.
The system DID work - the passengers kicked that guy’s ass. What’s the problem?
Flying sucks, and has since about 1995. It used to be fun, there used to be lots of seats unoccupied, people used to dress well on an airplanes, and the food was sometimes even good. You could also change your ticket around at will without paying exhorbitant prices. The stewardesses were hot and fun to flirt with, and there were no ugly stewards. WTF happened?
You know you’re freaking stupid when you’re a leftist a-hole and all the other leftists are laughing at you.
A Dem told my friend at a party last night, he voted for hope and change and now he hates the b*stard.
If they would stop spanking the monkey so much.....
Where'd you get the idea I'm behind it??
Hilarious.
LOL! It must really be causing the DUmmies cognitive dissonance to be unable to blame Bush for forcing them to sit down and shut up.
>>[With wands like these, who needs enemas?] <<
Epic WIN!
Classic film. ;-)
Classic film. ;-)
You know. I didn't need that image in my head. Thanks! :-(
.
I too suffer from IBS and always have some of this on hand whenever I fly. It works for me.
Because (despite the DUmmies puerile take on it), you seem unable to concede that maybe they have a good point in slamming the new measures.
When mandatory cavity searches on all non-private transport becomes law, I expect the GOP and Dhimmis will be competing to see who can express their gratitude and relief the loudest.
I work at a company in NYC where most of the people are libtards or leftists. There is one other conservative. For years we’ve kept our mouths shut. Now we are openly laughing at the health monstrosity and crap-n-tax... and some of the libtards (not the full leftists) join in and laugh with us.
It’s truly amazing. I never thought I’d see the day.
If I had an airline ticket to fly this holiday season, I would be tempted to cancel it and take the bus back home. Then send a letter to the airline telling them I no longer have any confidence in the people running Homeland Security.
I want to know their reaction to their Dear Leader being to busy playing to deal with this news.
Lends a whole new meaning to "flying puddle jumpers"...
BTTT
Well, only because the explosive device didn't go off immediately.
Thought I would see a song parody tacked on the end: “Peeing on a Jet Plane”.
* Recommended by ex-NASA Astronuts
Not so. Maybe you missed it or maybe you're not familiar with how the DUmmie FUnnies works. We award "Kewpie Dolls" for "brief moments of mental clarity." In this thread I awarded a Kewpie Doll for this comment:
we're dealing with a bureaucracy that thinks it has to do something after every incident, whether what they do makes any sense or not. The reality is that this man should never have been allowed to board a plane bound for the USA. . . . Barn door closing regulations that don't address that are the feeble hand-waving of some Peter Principled bureaucrat who can't think of anything else to do.
Hose and Change
"Relieving on a Jet Plane"?
Auhhhhhggggg! My eyes!!!
So many golf courses...so little time!
Makes ya wanna vomit, no?
In the aisle!
LOL!
When ya think DUmmies just couldn’t get any DUmber!...their
fearless leader being in the lead!
Also the seats are now incredibly uncomfortable. The only reason I can give for the horrible service nowadays is that it is a marketing ploy. The airlines probably think that people will HATE flying coach so much that they will be more willing to fly first class.
lol- yes!
Police State.
Gatorade bottles have a wide neck. Just sayin...
The terrorist son of a whore brought a bomb on board a plane and nearly detonated. Is this YOUR definition of the system working?
The system failed. Fortunately, so did the bomb. Had it detonated as intended, the passengers would not have had the opportunity to kick the guy's ass.
You always get a laugh outta me.
You go ahead and all crap your pants for the last hour of the flight. You can live with the smell for that hour and the hour you wait on the tarmac waiting for a gate plus the hout of TSA searching the plane.
Have fun.
“Whip it out and let it fly in the aisle.”
Cool it, Ben Burch.
You mean 1970?
I have given this much thought as I am to travel soon. Since I am not allowed to take any liquids on board a flight, I will instead take an empty can to urinate in and drop it off at the security screener when I deplane. This keeps the seats clean for the next passenger, relieves me of any “pressure” that builds up since I am NOT allowed to take care of my business anywhere but in my seat and gives Janet Napolitano a reason to continue her ignorance.
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