Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

DUmmie FUnnies 04-15-10 (Tea Pitty: "Sarah Palin came to Boston and all I got was this lousy blog")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | April 15, 2010 | Primed Minister William Pitt the Drunker

Posted on 04/15/2010 7:15:47 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson

Happy Tax Day! It's the DUmmies' favorite holiday (next to May Day). Of course, in "Tea Parties" all across our land, overtaxed Americans have been rallying AGAINST oppressive, intrusive Big Government. But that's not for the DUmmies. Like vampires drawn to blood, liberals rely on the taxes paid by others to support their socialist wealth-redistribution schemes and scams.

But surely you would think that in Massachusetts, in Boston, in the Cradle of Liberty, in the HOME of the ORIGINAL Tea Party, all the citizenry would rise up as one, fused in patriotic fervor against the taxing tyrants on the Potomac! But no. Fittingly enough, William Pitt, the namesake of the British prime minister, opposes the cause of freedom from overtaxation. And so William Pitt the Drunker took to blogging this week when the Tea Party--and guest speaker Sarah Palin--came to Boston. We'll read about it in this THREAD, "Tea On The Common (Palin and the 'Baggers are in Boston tomorrow...and I'm blogging the whole mess)," and this THREAD, "Sarah Palin came to Boston and all I got was this lousy blog...."

William Pitt and the DUmmies are in Redcoat Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, is in the overtaxed [brackets]:

Tea On The Common (Palin and the 'Baggers are in Boston tomorrow...and I'm blogging the whole mess)

[Wee Willie will use the term "'Baggers" dozens of times throughout these threads. He seems obsessed with it. I think it goes back to games he and Jason Leopold used to play.]

By William Rivers Pitt

[Primed Minister William Pitt the Drunker]

they're coming to my town, hell, to my neighborhood, and tagging along with them is none other than the Queen Of Duh, Sarah Palin.

[Pitt is the King of DUh (or at least the prime minister).]

the former half-term governor of Alaska

[Which is more executive experience than a certain third-of-a-term, part-time, absentee senator had when he became president.]

From Boston, the 'Bagger parade heads to Washington, DC, for a rally on tax day, which will in all likelihood earn itself a first-ballot nomination to the Public Stupidity Hall of Fame.

[Pitt has his own wing in the Public Stupidity Hall of Fame.]

the average American has been well-trained to believe Massachusetts is some far-left haven dotted with statues of Howard Zinn and Noam Chomsky, with abortionists and gay marriage chapels on every street corner and drifts of marijuana seeds in the gutters.

[And that's such a distorted view! It totally neglects the Wiccans, for example.]

but the liberal stereotyping of Massachusetts does not dovetail with the reality on the ground. Massachusetts, and Boston, enjoys a decent-sized Republican/conservative contingent.

[They must take up, oh, two or three phone booths at their convention.]

Adding to this is the ugly subtext of racism, which is all too prevalent in . . .

[. . . the made-up stories about the Tea Parties.]

With Obama in the White House, the combination of 'Bagger bedlam and Boston-style racism will almost certainly turn Boston Common into an open-air insane asylum complete with pigeons poop and trolley services.

[And Pigeon Pooper Pitt.]

The front page of the Boston Herald . . . carried a picture of Scott Brown under a headline which blared "PARTY POOPER". . . .

[I sense a theme here.]

A friend suggested I show up with a big cardboard outline of Russia on my head, just to make Palin feel more at home, but that seems a little much.

[You could fit a life-size drawing of Russia on the bald pate of Planet Pitt.]

Sarah Palin came to Boston and all I got was this lousy blog...

[It's now the day of the Tea Party, and the Boston Blogger begins . . .]

8:35 a.m. - Woke up and turned the TV on. . . .

[Pitt had blacked out for a moment after an all-night bender at Bukowski's.]

9:50 a.m. - Tranquility Base, the Stupid has landed.

[Tequila Base, the Ego has Landed.]

It's a bright sunny day, so a lot of white people will be pink before the show is over.

[That's the Pitt calling the Caucasian white. Take a look at Ol' Pastyhead:]

10:00 a.m. - This might be the oddest crowd I've ever seen.

[They're not all drunk, tattooed, and pierced.]

10:05 a.m. - All these people are carrying pro-Constitution signs, but I keep hearing . . . anti-Federal government comments. It begs the question . . . since the Constitution itself established federal governance to begin with, what document are these people actually reading? Maybe the Reader's Digest version?

[Maybe the version that limits the federal government to only those powers explicitly delegated to it in the Constitution. You know, the old document that Obama thinks is "fundamentally flawed."]

10:25 a.m. - Just spent ten bucks on five buttons. I'm wearing the red one with the Soviet symbol replacing the "O" in "Obama."

[Wear it with pride, Will.]

10:40 a.m. - I am throwing up into my mouth right now.

[Usually Will gets it all over the floor.]

I've never seen so many people metaphorically masturbate in public before. . . .

[At the prog rallies, it's no metaphor.]

11:05 a.m. - Palin is on, but the microphone just cut out. Can't hear a word she's saying.

["Hey, tell that sunburnt bald guy with the cigarette over there: Read my lips. No new taxes!"]

11:15 a.m. - The audio is working in fits and starts.

[Merry Fitsmas!]

Even at half volume, Palin's voice is like fingernails across the chalkboard of my soul.

[Uh, Will, have you listened to your own gravelly voice lately?]

11:15 a.m. - it appears the show is over. It's early, but d*mn, I need a drink.

[Coffee, tea, . . . or five beers at Bukowski's?]

11:25 a.m. - OK, this is Boston, right?

[Pitt is disoriented already. So, in closing, let's hear from at least one of the DUmmies . . .]

m$nbc just reported that 'sarah palin ROCKS boston' do you feel rocked will?

["Stoned" would be more like it.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: boston; dufu; dummie; dummiefunnies; dummies; massachusetts; palin; pitt; sarahpalin; taxday; teaparty; williampitt; williamriverspitt
The Boston Blogger Battles the 'Baggers! The mind boggles. . . .
1 posted on 04/15/2010 7:15:47 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix; Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; ...

PING!


2 posted on 04/15/2010 7:17:40 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Primed Minister William Pitt the Drunker.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

Bow to me lesser replyers!


3 posted on 04/15/2010 7:20:17 PM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

9:50 a.m. - Tranquility Base, the Stupid has landed.

[Tequila Base, the Ego has Landed.]

It’s a bright sunny day, so a lot of white people will be pink before the show is over.

[That’s the Pitt calling the Caucasian white. Take a look at Ol’ Pastyhead:]

LOL!


4 posted on 04/15/2010 7:25:50 PM PDT by mylife (Opinions...$1 Halfbaked...50c)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

Wow, top 10?


5 posted on 04/15/2010 7:27:33 PM PDT by Personal Responsibility (I'd use the /s tag but is it really necessary?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

Top 10 - Yea!!!


6 posted on 04/15/2010 7:28:41 PM PDT by KosmicKitty (WARNING: Hormonally crazed woman ahead!!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

Thanks for all you do PJ and CH! Hilarious!


7 posted on 04/15/2010 7:40:54 PM PDT by Notforprophet
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: mylife; Charles Henrickson

William Pitt the Whiter?


8 posted on 04/15/2010 7:41:13 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (FUBO! FUNP! FUHR! FUBS!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

Top 10?


9 posted on 04/15/2010 7:41:19 PM PDT by Ballygrl
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Slings and Arrows

You mean Pitt the Whiner


10 posted on 04/15/2010 7:43:04 PM PDT by mylife (Opinions...$1 Halfbaked...50c)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

The racists all seem to be the white people hating liberals like Pitt.


11 posted on 04/15/2010 7:44:01 PM PDT by Duke Nukum (I know writers who use subtext and they're all cowards.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: mikrofon
Palin is on, but the microphone just cut out.

What do you have to say for yourself, young man?

12 posted on 04/15/2010 7:51:35 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Primed Minister William Pitt the Drunker.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

You and PJ should have a show on FOX. (It could take Shep’s time slot)


13 posted on 04/15/2010 8:23:16 PM PDT by jla (Obama & Co. vs. Jefferson & Madison - my money's on the latter)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

You really seem to like Bukowski’s. This is the third or so thread by you in the past year with a mention of it. What gives?:)


14 posted on 04/15/2010 8:28:17 PM PDT by posterchild (Endowed by my Creator with certain unalienable rights.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
11:15 a.m. - it appears the show is over. It's early, but d*mn, I need a drink.

Whiskey Rivers Pitt rides again.

15 posted on 04/15/2010 8:33:08 PM PDT by rdl6989 (January 20, 2013- The end of an error.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: posterchild
You really seem to like Bukowski’s. This is the third or so thread by you in the past year with a mention of it. What gives?:)

See post 15.

16 posted on 04/15/2010 8:42:36 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Primed Minister William Pitt the Drunker.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

If you want to shoot redcoats, come to an applessed. We’ll show you how to make headshots with iron sights at 250 yds just like our forefathers did.


17 posted on 04/15/2010 8:58:46 PM PDT by ebshumidors (Marksmanship and YOUR heritage http://www.appleseedinfo.org)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

Was Mr. Pitt a Bukowski patron?


18 posted on 04/15/2010 8:59:28 PM PDT by posterchild (Endowed by my Creator with certain unalienable rights.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: posterchild; franksolich; PJ-Comix
Was Mr. Pitt a Bukowski patron?

Was Mr. Pitt a Bukowski PATRON? Heck, he's practically part of the decor!!


19 posted on 04/15/2010 9:09:02 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Primed Minister William Pitt the Drunker.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson; posterchild

He could practically buy the place considering the money he’s spends there.


20 posted on 04/15/2010 9:17:46 PM PDT by rdl6989 (January 20, 2013- The end of an error.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

So that is Pitt? The butt of my Lhaso Apso looks better than that.


21 posted on 04/15/2010 10:02:24 PM PDT by wjcsux ("In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." - George Orwell)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
10:05 a.m. - All these people are carrying pro-Constitution signs, but I keep hearing . . . anti-Federal government comments. It begs the question . . . since the Constitution itself established federal governance to begin with, what document are these people actually reading? Maybe the Reader's Digest version?

*headdesk*

22 posted on 04/15/2010 11:26:22 PM PDT by Ultra Sonic 007 (To view the FR@Alabama ping list, click on my profile!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: mylife

That too.


23 posted on 04/15/2010 11:31:53 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (FUBO! FUNP! FUHR! FUBS!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

To: Ultra Sonic 007

Yeah, that one’s certainly face palm worthy.

And what’s with the “white people” this and “white people” that? Does Pitt (along with other leftists) consider himself black? Reminds me of Pfleger in his ranting “I’m white, I’m entitled!” speech at Trinity Church, with all the good, salt-of-the-earth black folks laughing hysterically. Did he really think a single one of them would choose him over ANY black person in ANY situation?

It boggles my mind.


24 posted on 04/15/2010 11:59:50 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater ("Get out of the boat and walk on the water with us!”--Sen. Joe Biden)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
[Wee Willie will use the term "'Baggers" dozens of times throughout these threads. He seems obsessed with it. I think it goes back to games he and Jason Leopold used to play.]

Did you know that Leopold (of Leopold & Lib) is BACK at TruthOut as Deputy Managing Editor?

25 posted on 04/16/2010 4:30:14 AM PDT by PJ-Comix ( Redundancy Can Be Quite Catchy As Well As Contagious)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
[That's the Pitt calling the Caucasian white. Take a look at Ol' Pastyhead:]

It's the sickly fishbelly white gene. There are people like that who can NEVER tan and remain with that unhealthy look. Pitt is one of them. Very painful to look at them when they turn lobster red when they are out in the sun for a few minutes.

26 posted on 04/16/2010 4:34:21 AM PDT by PJ-Comix ( Redundancy Can Be Quite Catchy As Well As Contagious)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
[Uh, Will, have you listened to your own gravelly voice lately?]

10,000 packs of cigarettes went into lining the Pitt throat to give us that unique sound.

27 posted on 04/16/2010 4:37:12 AM PDT by PJ-Comix ( Redundancy Can Be Quite Catchy As Well As Contagious)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
From Boston, the 'Bagger parade heads to Washington, DC, for a rally on tax day, which will in all likelihood earn itself a first-ballot nomination to the Public Stupidity Hall of Fame.

[Pitt has his own wing in the Public Stupidity Hall of Fame.]

From DUmmie land, the bugger parade heads to Boston to agitate the patriots of America.


the average American has been well-trained to believe Massachusetts is some far-left haven dotted with statues of Howard Zinn and Noam Chomsky,

The intelligent American knows that Massachusetts is some far-left haven dotted with statues of Howard Zinn and Noam Chomsky,


Adding to this is the ugly subtext of racism, which is all too prevalent in . . .

[. . . the made-up stories about the Tea Parties.]

Quit talking about the DUmmie TOTUS you leftists elected.


8:35 a.m. - Woke up and turned the TV on. . . .

[Pitt had blacked out for a moment after an all-night bender at Bukowski's.]

8:35??? Heck, I have been at work for over two hours at 8:35. Get a REAL effing job.


Even at half volume, Palin's voice is like fingernails across the chalkboard of my soul.

[Uh, Will, have you listened to your own gravelly voice lately?]

At half volume, I cannot stand zero on the radio, tv or anything. I have to turn his nasty, irritating, grating, obnoxious, scraggly, voice
OFF.

28 posted on 04/16/2010 5:23:24 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (Remember in November. Clean the house on Nov. 2nd. / Progressive is a PC word for liberal democrat.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Ultra Sonic 007
10:05 a.m. - All these people are carrying pro-Constitution signs, but I keep hearing . . . anti-Federal government comments. It begs the question . . . since the Constitution itself established federal governance to begin with, what document are these people actually reading? Maybe the Reader's Digest version?

*headdesk*

Saw your comment earlier, so didn't comment on that. No joke. It's like they think "We don't need no stink'in Constitution for this country".

29 posted on 04/16/2010 5:34:32 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (Remember in November. Clean the house on Nov. 2nd. / Progressive is a PC word for liberal democrat.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
Palin is on, but the microphone just cut out.

What do you have to say for yourself, young man?

I was just out getting some feedback from the crowd...

30 posted on 04/16/2010 6:22:07 AM PDT by mikrofon (Palin Drone)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson

ROFL!


31 posted on 04/17/2010 7:37:00 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: posterchild

Pitt’s the one who is a regular at Bukowski’s.


32 posted on 04/19/2010 1:37:38 PM PDT by Purrcival (Proud to share my birthday with President Reagan)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
Like vampires drawn to blood, liberals rely on the taxes paid by others to support their socialist wealth-redistribution schemes and scams. - Simple solution - no representation without taxation. If you don’t contribute you don’t distribute.
33 posted on 04/20/2010 4:26:54 PM PDT by Free_at_last_-2001 (A country can survive its fools, but it cannot survive treason from within.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson