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Top 10: Essential Items to Survive a Zombie Apocalypse
science-technology ^

Posted on 12/03/2010 9:15:29 AM PST by JoeProBono

There’s nothing worse than getting caught in the middle of a Zombie Apocalypse empty handed. Tools are key to survival, and especially when your survival depends on a war waged with the living dead. Here is a list of 10 essential items to survive a Zombie Apocalypse.



TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: amc; banglist; brainsbraiinsbraains; cw2; fattiesgofirst; frzombielist; georgeromero; lastnightonearth; nightofthelivingdead; prepper; shaunofthedead; shorthair; survivalism; teotwawki; thewalkingdead; top10; walkingdead; zombieapocalypse; zombiedefenseforce; zombiedefenseplan; zombieland; zombies
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1. Compass In this situation, a handheld GPS would actually be ideal, but given that the increase in zombie population means an inevitable global satellite failure, it’s best to keep things as old school as possible. Brushing up on the difference between North and South also wouldn’t be a bad idea.

2. Pocket Map Start in the area you’re attempting to flee. Chances are you’ve heard about a magical camp/village/cargo ship some distance away that serves as a safe haven, if you only knew how to reach it. Steal more maps as you continue on your journey. Knowing where you’re are is the first step to getting where you’re going. Plus, this way you won’t miss the Grand Canyon on your way to your new home at the camp/village/cargo ship.

3. Gun and ammo Preferably something easy to carry with plenty of rounds per cartridge. AN assault rifle would be recommended. Range weapons are best, as they allow maximum casualties with plenty of room for retreat. Avoid weapons that hold fifteen rounds of ammo or less. Nothing sucks more than getting your arm gnawed off because you didn’t have time to reload.

4. Lighter Some might suggest lighter fuel and matches, but the truth is, one well stocked cigarette lighter (antique, of course – remember, old school) should see you through the worst of the apocalypse. Not only will it help you cook whatever pigeons and squirrels you manage to kill for food, it will also be helpful in setting fire to the living dead.

5. Hummer Sure, they’re bad for the environment, but then again, so are flesh eating zombies. These babies are built for high impact travel. They hold several adults, they don’t roll as easy as the SUV your mom owns, and they’re the next best thing to driving a tank. Sturdy and dependable, this beast will flatten anything in its path while doing 80 down a deserted highway on your way to the camp/village/cargo ship. Stop for gas at every deserted station.

6. Chain Mail What is this, a zombie attack, or a Renaissance Faire? You want to protect as much of your luscious, living flesh as you can from potential zombie bites. No one’s really sure how infection spreads, but it’s better to be safe than sorry. Light weight full body armor is best, but at least do your best to protect your arms and upper torso. In the plus column, chain mail looks good with almost anything and you’ll be the envy of all your new friends, most of whom are probably going to die soon.

7. Zombie Movies You’ll be traveling a lot in that Hummer – probably with a ragtag group of friends and new acquaintances – so you should spend that time brushing up on how to kill zombies. Look for obvious mistakes made by fictional survivors and strive to do better than going back for a doomed friend or isolating yourself from the group in the middle of a battle. Do not make the mistake of assuming that you are the star of the movie, and therefore indispensible. You could just as easily be the funny friend that dies in the second act.

8. Military water purification tablets Let’s be honest: you don’t know how fresh that water’s going to be wherever it is you’re going, and you may be miles from the nearest zombie-free Wal-Mart. Ensuring you always have a source of fresh drinking water is a surefire way to survive in between zombie attacks. Always rinse out your canteen between purifications. Avoid bodies of water recently inhabited by zombies and/or zombie fish.

9. Comfortable shoes Zombies don’t move very fast, so it becomes probable that you can outrun them. Make sure you’re outfitted with the kind of high priced footwear a professional athlete or futuristic apocalyptic warrior would wear. You want to move like Kobe or at least appear just as cool. Remember to stretch before running from zombies, unless, of course, zombies are already attacking. The more unique your footwear, the better the chance that you are the star of this zombie attack, therefore securing your long term survival.

10. Ham Radio It will eventually become important to have contact with the surviving outside world. Since most modern forms of communication will be eradicated, it will become necessary to use sad, outdated technology to find other scrappy survivors who also had grandfathers that lived through World War II and never threw any of their old crap away. These people will be running the camp/village/cargo ship and you will probably not agree with how they do things. Luckily, zombies do not know how to use radios or other devices requiring more speech than the occasional needful moan.

1 posted on 12/03/2010 9:15:32 AM PST by JoeProBono
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To: JoeProBono

Our biggest problem is that Zombies have the right to vote. And they are more than half the population.


2 posted on 12/03/2010 9:17:52 AM PST by DManA
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To: DManA

Rule #1. Cardio, cardio, cardio

The fatties are the first go to.


3 posted on 12/03/2010 9:18:42 AM PST by Hodar (Who needs laws .... when this "feels" so right?)
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To: JoeProBono

Bump for later


4 posted on 12/03/2010 9:19:16 AM PST by Anitius Severinus Boethius
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To: DManA

5 posted on 12/03/2010 9:20:12 AM PST by ClearCase_guy
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To: JoeProBono

I didn’t even know Rob Zombie was that mad at humanity.


6 posted on 12/03/2010 9:20:49 AM PST by theDentist (fybo; qwerty ergo typo : i type, therefore i misspelll)
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To: Hodar

Rule #2: The Double Tap!


7 posted on 12/03/2010 9:21:15 AM PST by catman67
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To: JoeProBono
Disguise yourself as a Democrats.
 

Since Zombies are after brains... They'll leave you alone.


8 posted on 12/03/2010 9:21:15 AM PST by Responsibility2nd (Yes, as a matter of fact, what you do in your bedroom IS my business.)
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To: JoeProBono

“Plenty of rounds per cartridge”? I hate amateurs. The author is gonna be chum when the zombies come, bet on it.


9 posted on 12/03/2010 9:21:27 AM PST by Billthedrill
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To: Hodar
The fatties are the first go to.

Poor fat bastards.
10 posted on 12/03/2010 9:21:39 AM PST by mmichaels1970
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To: DManA
I'm good on all but 6) Chainmail, and 10) Ham Radio.

Any Ham Radio operators on FR that can sort us unprepared types out?

11 posted on 12/03/2010 9:21:59 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: theDentist

12 posted on 12/03/2010 9:22:44 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: mmichaels1970

11) Barber kit. Zombies can’t grab ahold of short hair.


13 posted on 12/03/2010 9:24:13 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: DCBryan1

How do we freepers reconnect with each other?

Maybe we need a freeper Zombie plan.


14 posted on 12/03/2010 9:24:25 AM PST by luckystarmom
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To: DCBryan1

12) Tight fitting clothing. Ibid #11.


15 posted on 12/03/2010 9:24:47 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: JoeProBono

“Gun and ammo Preferably something easy to carry with plenty of rounds per cartridge”

Just how many rounds are in a cartridge? LOL


16 posted on 12/03/2010 9:25:07 AM PST by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: JoeProBono

Guns. Lots of guns.


17 posted on 12/03/2010 9:25:27 AM PST by justlurking (The only remedy for a bad guy with a gun is a good WOMAN (Sgt. Kimberly Munley) with a gun)
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To: JoeProBono

LOL!!! Oh man, 5&6 hit so close to home!!!


18 posted on 12/03/2010 9:25:44 AM PST by WestwardHo (Whom the gods would destroy, they first drive mad.)
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To: Billthedrill
“Plenty of rounds per cartridge”? I hate amateurs.

I think he meant "Plenty of rounds per caliber".

19 posted on 12/03/2010 9:26:11 AM PST by grobdriver (Proud Member, Party Of No! No Socialism - No Fascism - Nobama - No Way!)
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To: DCBryan1

20 posted on 12/03/2010 9:26:44 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: JoeProBono
LOL!

I emailed a copy of this list to Mr. trisham. I'd like him to survive the coming zombie apocalypse as well.

21 posted on 12/03/2010 9:27:02 AM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: JoeProBono

That’s great. My son talked about this kind of stuff a lot before he left for boot camp. I printed this and sent it to him. I’m sure it will make him laugh. :-)


22 posted on 12/03/2010 9:27:33 AM PST by Millicent_Hornswaggle (Retired US Marine wife)
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To: justlurking

23 posted on 12/03/2010 9:29:41 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: JoeProBono

1: Zombies do not wave at other zombies - so don’t hit the one guy who does - he may not know about the zombie apocalypse

2: When the Zombie Apocalyspe begins - it’s no time to be a racist - you’ll probably lose a hand.

3: Glocks does not have a manual safety

4: Do your relatives a favor if they turn into Zombies - shoot them!

5: When picking upa bag of guns in the middle of the street - make sure you look left & right and check to see if there’s a car load of mexican “ese’s” waiting - becuae they will jack your a$$ once you get the weapons!

6: Once the Zombie apocalyspe starts - do not go to the CDC - they obviously did not prevent it - therefore it is doubtful they have the cure...

7: When wakling pass over run military check points that have large calibre weapon systems (crew served) - grab that sh*t and use it!


24 posted on 12/03/2010 9:29:46 AM PST by BCW (http://babylonscovertwar.com/index.html)
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To: JoeProBono
Re: #12. Tight fitting clothing. Zombies can't get ahold of it.

Oh yeah...if we can get rid of the fatties eaten up and get the remaining females using guns and wearing tight fitting clothes, I'm all up for the zombie apocolypse! Let's Roll!

25 posted on 12/03/2010 9:30:38 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: JoeProBono

Don’t forget your “Lucky Ham”. Wear it around your neck for protection...


26 posted on 12/03/2010 9:31:06 AM PST by 2dollarbill
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To: BCW

27 posted on 12/03/2010 9:32:36 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: ClearCase_guy

I so need that in a non-hoodie. Will have to chase that down later.


28 posted on 12/03/2010 9:33:09 AM PST by FreedomPoster (No Representation without Taxation!)
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To: JoeProBono

29 posted on 12/03/2010 9:34:23 AM PST by Carpe Cerevisi
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To: JoeProBono

A back hoe and diesel.

Just dig a big trench around your place. Zombies are stupid and would walk into it and not get out. Burn them in the trench.

(And yes, like all fixed fortifications, would require upkeep and persons to man it.)

A nice, non-climable, wall would work, too.

Both together would be best.


30 posted on 12/03/2010 9:35:14 AM PST by TheThirdRuffian (Nothing to see here. Move along.)
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To: JoeProBono
The current series of The Walking Dead showing on AMC channel Sunday nights is a great tutorial of what to expect, what to do, and what not to do in a zombie infested scenario. Watch and learn.


31 posted on 12/03/2010 9:35:42 AM PST by OB1kNOb (China is now the world's ant. America has become the world's grasshopper. Fear the coming winter.)
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To: BCW
7: When wakling pass over run military check points that have large calibre weapon systems (crew served) - grab that sh*t and use it!

Let me expand on that. Most belt feds fire from the OPEN BOLT, and need to have the chamber and feed tray clear, before charging the handle.

I train my family that if you close the top cover on an M60 whilst the belt is in the feedtray AND the bolt is closed, you are gonna bend your top feed tray channel, and screw up the gun.

Proper zombie firing mode for MALES:

Proper zombie firing mode for FEMALES:

FWIW

32 posted on 12/03/2010 9:35:48 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: All

b


33 posted on 12/03/2010 9:36:38 AM PST by Maverick68
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To: DCBryan1
I'm good on all but 6) Chainmail, and 10) Ham Radio.

Chainmail armor, $132.55 on Amazon

34 posted on 12/03/2010 9:37:47 AM PST by PapaBear3625 ("It is only when we've lost everything, that we are free to do anything" -- Fight Club)
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To: JoeProBono

“5. Hummer”

I’d rather have a long-haul Peterbuilt with a sleeper cab.

High metal doors, windows up high, long range, diesel doens’t go bad nearly as fast, secure place to sleep.

Plus, you could basically push anything you want out of the way.


35 posted on 12/03/2010 9:38:41 AM PST by TheThirdRuffian (Nothing to see here. Move along.)
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To: OB1kNOb

IF you've already had the pleasure of watching episode one of Frank Darabont's TV adaptation of Robert Kirkman's much-loved zombie comic The Walking Dead, then you won't be surprised at the news a second season has been green-lit.


36 posted on 12/03/2010 9:39:42 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: JoeProBono

I still need to get a radio, talk about procrastination!!


37 posted on 12/03/2010 9:41:08 AM PST by spitter
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To: TheThirdRuffian

38 posted on 12/03/2010 9:41:54 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: Lazamataz
Re Post#25. Laz would hit it!

Zombies, guns, and tight fitting clothes! THIS IS YOUR KINDA THREAD!

39 posted on 12/03/2010 9:42:04 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: DCBryan1

http://www.hamradio.com/


40 posted on 12/03/2010 9:42:33 AM PST by Calamari (Pass enough laws and everyone is guilty of something.)
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To: TheThirdRuffian
I’d rather have a long-haul Peterbuilt with a sleeper cab. High metal doors, windows up high, long range, diesel doens’t go bad nearly as fast, secure place to sleep.

But think of how long it would take you if you need to refuel, I mean the zombie hoard would come enmasse, you'd get nervous drop the flowing fuel line to jump into the cab, your first shot would cause a spark that would engulf you and the cab, and the zombies would have a hot meal ala Night of the Living Dead. (shudder) ;-)

41 posted on 12/03/2010 9:43:15 AM PST by OB1kNOb (China is now the world's ant. America has become the world's grasshopper. Fear the coming winter.)
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To: PapaBear3625

42 posted on 12/03/2010 9:43:49 AM PST by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
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To: JoeProBono

That IS good news. WOOT!


43 posted on 12/03/2010 9:44:10 AM PST by OB1kNOb (China is now the world's ant. America has become the world's grasshopper. Fear the coming winter.)
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To: OB1kNOb

My wife likes that show!


44 posted on 12/03/2010 9:44:43 AM PST by ▀udda▀udd (7 days - 7 ways Guero >>> with a floating, shifting, ever changing persona.....)
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To: justlurking

Guns. Lots of guns.

More important bullets, lots of bullets.


45 posted on 12/03/2010 9:45:20 AM PST by Bitsy
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To: OB1kNOb

A Zombie Primer.


46 posted on 12/03/2010 9:45:42 AM PST by j.argese (Boycott Nevada.)
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To: OB1kNOb

A Zombie Primer.


47 posted on 12/03/2010 9:45:55 AM PST by j.argese (Boycott Nevada.)
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To: ├čudda├čudd

It is an excellent zombie show, IMO. I look forward to another season.


48 posted on 12/03/2010 9:46:26 AM PST by OB1kNOb (China is now the world's ant. America has become the world's grasshopper. Fear the coming winter.)
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To: JoeProBono
On the way to your bug out location (BOL), you may have to stop and rest. A tent on top of your "hillbilly armored" urban assault vehicle, should have an elevated tent since small numbers of zombies cannot climb well.

Of course, this is only temporary shelter until you can get to a more fortified location with firing slits, moats, improvised land mines, range markers, sniper nests, etc.

49 posted on 12/03/2010 9:46:43 AM PST by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: JoeProBono
3: Bow / crossbow with plenty of arrows/bolts and the skill to use either effectively. Firearms are loud. Gunpowder gets wet. Firearms must be cleaned regularly. Bows are dependable, accurate from a close and moderate distance, quiet, and easy to maintain. Arrows can be maintained, recovered, and reused. 6: Kevlar. Lighter, quieter, and just as effective against bites. (Plus kevlar gloves give you some protection on the tender finger strips while not incumbering your ability to reliably use them for anything other than pounding a zed over the head. 11: Paintball mask. Preventing blood from splattering into delicate tissues is a must. 12: If you're being realistic, one bullet to put in your own brain pan. Once the power goes out, you're going to have to deal with chlorine gas settling into low lying areas after cooling stations go down(read: around water supplies,) radiation from just about every nuclear reactor in the affected area going into meltdown (unless by some miracle those that know how to operate them KEEP operating them,) huge wildfires from gas leaks hitting pilot lights, etc, etc, etc. Zombies would be the least of your problem.
50 posted on 12/03/2010 9:47:16 AM PST by Renderofveils (My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music. - Nabokov)
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