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NFL “Modern Day Slavery” Says Running Back
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 19 March 2011 | John Semmens

Posted on 03/21/2011 9:03:25 PM PDT by John Semmens

Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson argues that professional athletes are “modern day slaves.”

“People might laugh at me for saying this, but I feel like a slave,” Peterson contended. “Sure, there’s six or seven-figure annual salaries, but what about the working conditions? We have to play outdoors most of the time—in the heat, cold, rain or even snow. Meanwhile, most of our fans are sitting at home with their feet up, snacks and drinks at hand. They’re benefiting from our suffering.”

“And how many other jobs are there where 200+ lb. guys get to beat on you and it’s legal?” Peterson asked. “I feel like I’m feloniously assaulted every time I carry the ball. I get beat more often than Uncle Tom did by Simon Legree.”

As degrading as playing football for a living might be Peterson feels “the pain could be eased somewhat if the pay were better. I mean there’s lots of money out there they could give us. The owners are millionaires. The cities have multimillion dollar annual budgets. Each of the fans may not have as much, but there are millions of them. We just need to come up with some way to get more of that money into the players’ pockets.”

read more...

http://azconserv1.wordpress.com/2011/03/19/omb-nominee-explains-obama-strategy-on-debt/


TOPICS: History; Humor; Society; Sports
KEYWORDS: adrianpeterson; athletes; ericholderspeople; oppression; satire; wages; youpeople4youpeople

1 posted on 03/21/2011 9:03:27 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Head shakin’ chuckle John. SHEESH!!!


2 posted on 03/21/2011 9:07:39 PM PDT by rockinqsranch (Dems, Libs, Socialists, call 'em what you will, they ALL have fairies livin' in their trees.)
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To: John Semmens

And he is waiting for the “not his people” to fix it.

Again.


3 posted on 03/21/2011 9:07:59 PM PDT by NoLibZone (Impeach Obama & try him for treason / Homosexuals reject diversity / Unions finally caught for theft)
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To: John Semmens

“YOSAH!”


4 posted on 03/21/2011 9:12:41 PM PDT by Brad from Tennessee (A politician can't give you anything he hasn't first stolen from you.)
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To: John Semmens
“People might laugh at me for saying this, but I feel like a slave,” Peterson contended. “Sure, there’s six or seven-figure annual salaries, but what about the working conditions? We have to play outdoors most of the time—in the heat, cold, rain or even snow. Meanwhile, most of our fans are sitting at home with their feet up, snacks and drinks at hand. They’re benefiting from our suffering.” “And how many other jobs are there where 200+ lb. guys get to beat on you and it’s legal?” Peterson asked. “I feel like I’m feloniously assaulted every time I carry the ball. I get beat more often than Uncle Tom did by Simon Legree.”

Call the WAAAmbulance, ya freakin' pussy.

A lot of people would kill to get your job.

Literally.

5 posted on 03/21/2011 9:14:03 PM PDT by Lazamataz (The Democrat Party is Communist. The Republican Party is Socialist. The Tea Party is Capitalist.)
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To: John Semmens

Well, if he keeps his ‘nose’ clean and passes a couple of tests maybe, just maybe, he can qualify for a nice, warm, indoor job at Mickey D’s....

Long shot, but he may just make it.

Problem Solved....


6 posted on 03/21/2011 9:14:25 PM PDT by xrmusn ((6/98) "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits")
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To: John Semmens

would someone tell this blithering idiot that he can quit and that’s all the difference in the world?


7 posted on 03/21/2011 9:15:08 PM PDT by lonster
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To: John Semmens

Indentured servitude is closer, but most indentured servants were never paid millions of dollars for playing a game, never mind the marketing contracts.


8 posted on 03/21/2011 9:17:59 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
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To: John Semmens

>>We have to play outdoors most of the time—in the heat, cold, rain or even snow.<<

So does a shoe.


9 posted on 03/21/2011 9:20:44 PM PDT by freedumb2003 (Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats. /P. J. O'Rourke, 1991)
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To: freedumb2003

I hope some military personnel straighten him out about working conditions and paychecks.


10 posted on 03/21/2011 9:24:31 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
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To: John Semmens

“...“the pain could be eased somewhat if the pay were better.”

OTOH, Adrian could take up bridge and become World Champion. But I doubt if that’s very appealing to him.


11 posted on 03/21/2011 9:24:59 PM PDT by Rembrandt (.. AND the donkey you rode in on.)
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To: skr

Oops, somehow I missed the semi-satire clue.


12 posted on 03/21/2011 9:25:27 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
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To: John Semmens

If there is a season this year, AP’s base salary will be more than $10 Million. That is 8 figures... Yo Adrian.... how many fingers am I holding up?...


13 posted on 03/21/2011 9:28:16 PM PDT by GeronL (The Right to Life came before the Right to Happiness)
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To: TigersEye
“And how many other jobs are there where 200+ lb. guys get to beat on you and it’s legal?” Peterson asked. “I feel like I’m feloniously assaulted every time I carry the ball. I get beat more often than Uncle Tom did by Simon Legree.”

Hmm Peterson can always change jobs. The thing is what can he do besides football? I wonder if he studied & made sure when his career was over just what he would do. He sure knows how to whine.

14 posted on 03/21/2011 9:29:30 PM PDT by pandoraou812 (You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.)
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To: John Semmens

He can always quit and work fast food.


15 posted on 03/21/2011 9:33:36 PM PDT by CodeToad (Islam needs to be banned in the US and treated as a criminal enterprise.)
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To: pandoraou812

He sounds like an idiot to me.


16 posted on 03/21/2011 9:35:43 PM PDT by TigersEye (Who crashed the markets on 9/15/08 and why?)
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To: TigersEye

It’s satire.


17 posted on 03/21/2011 9:37:04 PM PDT by montyspython
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To: pandoraou812

Darn you, pandy. You just sucked me into this satire. }8-P


18 posted on 03/21/2011 9:37:16 PM PDT by TigersEye (Who crashed the markets on 9/15/08 and why?)
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To: montyspython

I see that. He actually did say that he thought playing NFL football was like slavery though.


19 posted on 03/21/2011 9:38:16 PM PDT by TigersEye (Who crashed the markets on 9/15/08 and why?)
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To: montyspython
Here is a non-satire article.

Adrian Peterson: NFL like "modern-day slavery"

20 posted on 03/21/2011 9:40:26 PM PDT by TigersEye (Who crashed the markets on 9/15/08 and why?)
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To: TigersEye

haha I thought it was real TE.


21 posted on 03/21/2011 9:40:55 PM PDT by pandoraou812 (You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.)
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To: John Semmens
While I wouldn't put a comment like that passed a football player, I still prefer hockey.

Good one, John.

22 posted on 03/21/2011 9:44:11 PM PDT by wastedyears (It has nothing to do with safety, and everything to do with control.)
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To: John Semmens

LOL Sheesh, exaggerate much Adrian? I don’t think slaves, security guards or soldiers will have much sympathy for you.


23 posted on 03/21/2011 9:55:46 PM PDT by stilloftyhenight (Don't make me use uppercase.)
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To: John Semmens

On the one hand, this is a business negotiation and that is capitalism. On the other, it is unions and that is socialism. Hey, but the owners do gang up on the players. But then again, they will kiss the teat of the great players to have them play for their team, so their bravado only goes so far.

Then we have the action. And one hand, the players do get their butt kicked but they also don’t have to do the job. It is not slavery; what a dumb arse comment.

Whahhh, wahhhhh - get the cheese for that whine. Poor boy has to play in the cold and wet. You are a dumbshit who should thank God you have some talent to play a game 1/2 the year for a million dollars rather than working at a Walgreens every day or whatever. Fame, fortune, open doors and all that baby blubbering. Grow the heck up joker!

So, should they get the extra dough? How about pay them by the pound :-)


24 posted on 03/21/2011 10:14:03 PM PDT by plaidness (The Fence)
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To: John Semmens
“Sure, there’s six or seven-figure annual salaries, but what about the working conditions? We have to play outdoors most of the time—in the heat, cold, rain or even snow. Meanwhile, most of our fans are sitting at home with their feet up, snacks and drinks at hand. They’re benefiting from our suffering.”

Poor baby.
You don't need to put up with the terrible conditions, moron.

Get a real job you're qualified for. Try Wendy's.

25 posted on 03/21/2011 10:29:28 PM PDT by Publius6961 (There has Never been a "Tax On The Rich" that has not reached the middle class)
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To: John Semmens

Peterson’s a twerp. If playing in the NFL was truly slavery then his back would be covered with whip marks for all of the fumbles he makes.


26 posted on 03/21/2011 10:54:07 PM PDT by VeniVidiVici (The last Democrat worth a damn was Stalin. He purged his whole Party.)
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To: John Semmens
NFL “Modern Day Slavery” Says Running Back

"Jump down *KA-CHING!* turn around *KA-CHING!* pick a bale of cotton *KA-CHING!*..."

Oh yes, just like slavery...

27 posted on 03/22/2011 5:34:17 AM PDT by Caipirabob ( Communists... Socialists... Democrats...Traitors... Who can tell the difference?)
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To: John Semmens

OK, this guy is making me sick. He takes home multi-million dollar paychecks to play a little boy’s game and he says he feels like a slave?

Give me a bloody break.


28 posted on 03/22/2011 5:37:42 AM PDT by caldera599
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To: skr
I hope some military personnel straighten him out about working conditions and paychecks.

Great point.

Not many NFL players out there dodging incoming fire or dealing with IEDs.

Well, aside from Oakland players, anyway.
29 posted on 03/22/2011 5:42:59 AM PDT by ConservativeWarrior (In last year's nests, there are no birds this year.)
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To: John Semmens

I know it’s satire but it’s so close to what he said that it is not even funny, just sad.


30 posted on 03/22/2011 6:32:59 AM PDT by USS Alaska (Nuke the terrorist savages.)
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To: USS Alaska

Sometimes I wonder why we bother with satire posts—the truth is ironic enough.


31 posted on 03/22/2011 12:06:01 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
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