Skip to comments.Superman Renounces U.S. Citizenship
Posted on 04/28/2011 8:44:58 PM PDT by TheConservativeCitizen
Holy crap Batman, whats up with Superman? It sounds like truth, justice, and the American way just dont get it for your Kryptonian pal anymore. What happened?
Yes citizens of Metropolis, its a dark day indeed. As unthinkable as it sounds, your super- hero is fed up with America and has renounced his U.S. citizenship. How can this be, you ask?
It seems that Superman dropped in on a Tehran demonstration to stand with non-violent protestors against the Iranian regime. This not only ticked off the Presidents national security advisor; the mullahs werent too happy either. Following a dress-down from the American government, the Man of Steel renounced his American citizenship at the United Nations the next day. (Hmm you dont suppose the Man of Awesomeness would follow suit, do you?)
Claiming that he was not abandoning his American values, Superman explained that hes only trying to implement them on a larger scale and divorcing himself from the political complexities of nationalism. (This is sounding more and more familiar the farther we go.)
The Man of Steel said that he has been thinking too small, and that he is too connected with the world to limit himself to a singular national identity. As an alien born on another planet, after all, he cant help but see the bigger picture. (BINGO, RATS GOT IT!)
Sources close to Superman indicate that the presidency of Barack Obama was the final motivation the Man of Steel needed to pull the trigger. As is the case with Obama, Superman finally realized that he is larger than America a true citizen of the world.
Barack Hussein Obama can only dream.
The Rat also heard that Superman was fed up with the incessant questions about his birth certificate.
Time to kill Superman.
Where’s the kryptonite when you really need it...?
I renounce treason-man.
Is rhis your first trip to FR??
I say it’s time for Batman to kick his ass again, like he did in Dark Knight Returns (the comic).
Wow! Under Obummers watch he lost Egypt, the value of a dollar and Superman.
"I want you to remember, Clark... in all the years to come... in your most private moments... I want you to remember my hand at your throat... I want you to remember the one man who beat you..." - Batman
...The jaded underworld is riding high...
Lord, here comes the flood....
(One of the best albums, ever)
Let me guess...for his next trick he will announce that he was really shtuping Lewis Lane.
That’s impossible, his jizz would blow a hole through her hoo-hoo.
It’s been theoretically proven.
Dear Lex Luthor:
Have your way with this traitor.
We don’t want him anymore.
He is hoping it will save his job and get him a position as a TV journalist.
Maybe he will start following Islamic values like a lot of other Western nihilists and we'll see him smashing down churches and killing women who don't wear burquas in the next series.
Cognitive dissonance. While Obaama is doubtless "small" (hung like a ...hamster), I think it'd be going too far to call him the "Man of Steel". (Steal, yes, as in National Debt; or wet noodle, as in Moochelle is *very* disappointed)
To quote FReeper Lizavetta for an Obaama haiku:
The wifey looks mad
Could it be that his johnson
Came from his white side?
And speaking of Teh One as Superman -- why doesn't anyone just bring a hunk of Kryptonite to his next fundraiser?
Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex by Larry Niven
OH that is a funny Haiku!!! I have done some, too:
Birthers and Obots
We spell Moron with an “A”
They worship the “O”
and my wine one:
Franzia wine rocks!
In its little cardboard box.
Replenish your stocks!!!
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