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DUmmie FUnnies 05-27-11 (DUmmie whines: "I hate where our country is right now.")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | May 27, 2011 | DUmmie kentuck, DUmmies, and Charles Henrickson

Posted on 05/27/2011 10:05:23 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson

WAAAAAAAAAHH!!! The Daze of Whine and Poses never end at DUmmieland. Today's contribution? This THREAD by DUmmie kentuck, "I hate where our country is right now."

So let us go to the land where we cannot question their patriotism, i.e., DUmmieland, where the comments are in Read-Whine Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson--who finally found some Flor de Caña rum here in St. Louis, PJ-Comix, and I put some on my vanilla ice cream--is in the [brackets]:

I hate where our country is right now.

[But, but, I thought Obamassiah was going to usher in the Age of Rainbows and Sparkles? Wha' hoppen?]

I used to believe we were a free country.

[I used to BELIEEEEEEEEEEEEVE!!!!!!!!!]

I used to believe that we were better than those countries that would torture other people.

[Don't worry, the torture's over. Oprah has retired.]

I used to believe that we could trust our elected officials and our President to protect our freedoms.

[Blah, blah, blah. . . .]

I used to believe we were a brave country, not a country of cowards.

[I am used to seeing the DUmmies do these "hyper-parallel constructionism" OPs time after time after time. . .]

I used to believe that someone would always come forward and speak the truth . . .

[TO POWER!]

and lead us to the light.

[Hey, what about the Lightworker? I thought he was going to fix everything. Unicorns farting rainbows and sparkles, you know.]

I never expected our country to go insane.

[NOBODY expects our country to go insane! Our chief weapon is surprise. . . .]

I never expected our citizens to defend big banks and corporations. . . .

[OK, now I see you're going to go into a "I never expected" hyper-parallel construction. Wake me when it's over.]

I never thought. . . .

[Ooh, variety!]

I used to believe. . . .

[Now we're back to "I used to believe."]

I used to think we were a compassionate country that would take care of those in need and hungry.

[Yes, it was called family, friends, church, community, private charity. . . .]

I used to think. . . .

[I find that hard to believe.]

I used to believe in our Constitution. . . .

[Then you became a liberal and forgot about that whole "limited government" business.]

Now, sadly, I see a country that I am ashamed to call my own.

[Canada beckons.]

Call me un-American or whatever you wish.

["Un-American" will do.]

I apologize if this might offend you.

[Is that you, Ed Schultz?]

[Now we go to the other DUmmies, responding to kentuck's "I hate where our country is right now." . . .]

Last I checked, it was in the same spot it was a few years ago, but Japan has shifted by a few feet.

[The better to send their radiation into our cows' milk!]

The only citizens I know that defend big banks of corporations are the tea baggers. . . . The great majority of the country would love to see bankers in chains. . . .

[benburch qualifies on both scores--teabagger, and loves to see guys in chains.]

I know a lot of people who consider themselves on the left who defend corporations all the time. Of course, most of them work for corporations.

[I don't believe it! The part about lefties working, I mean.]

Want to see this country's position flipped by 180 degrees?...wait 12 hours.

what's going to happen in 12 hours?

The earth will have rotated....180 degrees!

[Rimshot!]

I didn't have time to read beyond the thread title, but I would like to encourage you to be patient. . . .

[Irony much?]

When you watched the moon landing You saw the apex of American achievement. It's all been downhill from then.

[One small stop for apex. One giant slip for moonbats.]

I feel like I live in a bubble.

[I feel like you live in a basement.]

Ohio is turning into a right-wing nightmare state.

[Cue the Crying DUmmie!]

it's only gonna get worse too. Guaranteed. its the second law of thermodynamics at work: the universe is spiraling into chaos. . . .

[You are a fluke of the universe. You have no right to be here. . . .]

Reagan was the worst President we ever had by a mile. Even worse than Richard Nixon or James Buchanan.

[What about Chimpy McBushitler? . . . How soon they forget. . . .]

I am what I call a "Frank Capra" American. . . .

[You are what I call a "Fulla Crapola" American.]

We the people of these United States are no more...at least not yet.

[Make up your mind.]

Its up to us..not the media not our elected officials.....not the police....only us as a PEOPLE TO DEMAND THAT WE GET RID OF THE COWARDS AND ALL THE CROOKS IN THIS COUNTRY THAT HAS DRIVEN THIS COUNTRY INTO HELLS LAP.

[WE ARE THE ONES WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR!! AAAARRRRGGHHH!!!!]

And "only us as a PEOPLE TO DEMAND THAT" cannot be done by sitting in front of a computer screen day in, day out. . . .

[Oh, why not? I sent a Letter To The Editor last week! DUAC! DUAC!]

if not to plan, organize, and coordinate a movement that would involve some 50 million people in street protests (or more than 50 million, if 50 million won't be enough...)

[More! 500 million! Import them from Europe, Shanghai, Bratislava, Taipei, Guam. . . .]

Such a people's movement would have to completely halt the US economy in its tracks for a couple of weeks. . . .

[Not One D*mn Dime Couple of Weeks!]

That said, who's ready to lead such a MASSIVE Movement?

[How about nadin brzezzzshinski? We've reached the Rubicon and crossed a tipping point!]

I hate where some Democrats are right now...criticizing the brethren. . . .

[They're down in the sistern!]

I expect matters to get worse before I die, alas.

[The world continues to deteriorate. Give up!]

We are in a death struggle with the RW powers that be.

[Here we see the DUmmie Ant engaged in a life-or-death struggle with the Fox. . . .]

The enemy is in the f***ing tent -- Do you get that? The right wing is IN the Democratic tent right now, masquearading as Third Way, Blue Dogs, DLCers. . . .

[And LOUSY FREEPER TROLLS!!!]

Time to get the broom.

[Is that you, Helen Thomas?]

And a heavy duty dose of roach spray.

[Plus a bunch of roach clips.]

Obama has done nothing but continue and expand undemocratic Bush policies.

[IMPEACH OBAMA NOW!]

We are run by a set of vultures and there does not seem to be any way to stop them. . . . Vultures? More like cannibals.

[Most of you like cannabis.]

I am MUCH more concerned about republicans than mere terrorists.

[Beware the Palinstinians!]

Something else about Pat Sajak. He is ultra-sensitive about his height. They have elevated platforms behind the podiums where the contestants stand for Pat to stand on so he will never appear to be too short. You will seldom (never?) see a tall Wheel of Fortune contestant and some are really short. I guarantee Wheel of Fortune has a question on their entrance form like, "How tall are you?" If you are over 5'4" you are eliminated.

[Before the show, they put contestants ON the Wheel and run it in reverse, to make them shorter.]

America is in Pottersville right now. . . .

[Pitt is in Bukowskiville right now.]

I'm pretty tiny - I weigh a little over 100lbs, and I'm 5'4". I don't fear anything. . . .

[Hey, you could get on Wheel of Fortune! . . . The Wheel is not that bad, really. A few crushed vertebrae, that's all.]

stick a fork in us, we are done

[Wishing won't make it happen, ben.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dufu; dummie; dummiefunnies; dummies
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1 posted on 05/27/2011 10:05:27 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson
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To: Charles Henrickson

IPTP!


2 posted on 05/27/2011 10:06:50 PM PDT by Doomonyou (Let them eat Lead.)
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To: PJ-Comix; Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; ...

PING!


3 posted on 05/27/2011 10:08:43 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (WHEEL . . . OF . . . TORTURE !)
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To: Libloather
Thanx to Libloather for the heads-up on this thread!
4 posted on 05/27/2011 10:10:02 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (WHEEL . . . OF . . . TORTURE !)
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To: Charles Henrickson
I have successfully infiltrated DU. My user-name over there is **** ** ****.

Problem is, I have trouble sounding liberal. And sheesh, people who think JimRob is intolerant of dissent outta' give DU a whirl! I'm on my second or third DU user-name already.

5 posted on 05/27/2011 10:13:22 PM PDT by Celtic Cross (The brain is the weapon; everything else is just accessories. --FReeper Joe Brower)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I want to move to Guantanamo


6 posted on 05/27/2011 10:14:30 PM PDT by woofie
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To: Charles Henrickson

Se7en?


7 posted on 05/27/2011 10:18:44 PM PDT by FredZarguna ("It looks just like a Telefunken U47.....with leather.")
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To: Charles Henrickson

Number eight!


8 posted on 05/27/2011 10:23:44 PM PDT by wjcsux ("In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." - George Orwell)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I used to think that I used to believe that I thought.. wait, where was I?


9 posted on 05/27/2011 10:27:45 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: Charles Henrickson

What in the world are these morons asking for. They have their Marxist and the couch in the basement.


10 posted on 05/27/2011 10:30:44 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Charles Henrickson
“I used to believe that we could trust our elected officials and our President to protect our freedoms...”

And when did The Great Disillusionment happen? Last week? Last year? Don't get out much, do ya?

11 posted on 05/27/2011 10:30:49 PM PDT by decal (Mother Nature and Real Life are conservatives - the Progs have never figured this out.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Something else about Pat Sajak. He is ultra-sensitive about his height. They have elevated platforms behind the podiums where the contestants stand for Pat to stand on so he will never appear to be too short. You will seldom (never?) see a tall Wheel of Fortune contestant and some are really short. I guarantee Wheel of Fortune has a question on their entrance form like, "How tall are you?" If you are over 5'4" you are eliminated.

This one ought to get some kind of prize for randomness in a thread. LOL!

12 posted on 05/27/2011 10:32:50 PM PDT by LUV W (RUN SARAH...RUN!)
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To: Celtic Cross

Call yourself Rosie’s Plumber and see if it works.


13 posted on 05/27/2011 10:32:59 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Pat Sajak. That bastard!


14 posted on 05/27/2011 10:33:23 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: Roscoe Karns

Pat is cool.


15 posted on 05/27/2011 10:34:20 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I used to believe Pat Sajak was a good guy!


16 posted on 05/27/2011 10:35:14 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: eyedigress

I know- just goofing on the DUmmies


17 posted on 05/27/2011 10:37:00 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: Charles Henrickson

Aww! The dummies hate what they have done to themselves?

Whaaa! Whaa!

I dont care for their idea of freedom either but I aint cryin about it.


18 posted on 05/27/2011 10:40:28 PM PDT by mylife
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To: Roscoe Karns

I know they wait for this at FR. Why they remain so convoluted in why people are in charge is beyond me.


19 posted on 05/27/2011 10:42:49 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Charles Henrickson

[You are a fluke of the universe. You have no right to be here. . . .]

Two National Lampoon thumbs up.

(I hope you dog is getting enough cheese)


20 posted on 05/27/2011 10:43:39 PM PDT by eddie willers
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To: Charles Henrickson
Something else about Pat Sajak. He is ultra-sensitive about his height..

I used to believe Pat Sajak was 6 foot 5!

21 posted on 05/27/2011 10:44:07 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: Charles Henrickson
The only citizens I know that defend big banks of corporations are the tea baggers. . . . The great majority of the country would love to see bankers in chains. . . .

Hmmm... just who did Obama, Geitner and the Ben Bernack bail out hmmm ?

Why is Jeffrey Imelt and GE under a no tax status?

Good Lord these DUers are idiots

Obama is the king of corporate coruption. Wall street goes up and the poor go down.

22 posted on 05/27/2011 10:48:20 PM PDT by mylife
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To: Charles Henrickson
I am what I call a "Frank Capra" American. . . . "

A Capon American

23 posted on 05/27/2011 10:52:15 PM PDT by mylife
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To: mylife

You have that right. Just look good for the idiots and they sit home and have fun with TVLand.


24 posted on 05/27/2011 10:52:36 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Charles Henrickson
That said, who's ready to lead such a MASSIVE Movement?

DUmmie, Laxi Tive.

25 posted on 05/27/2011 10:54:51 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: mylife

I told a subordinate back in ‘96 that a capon was a Jewish delicacy of beef rolled in bread. He finally looked it up.


26 posted on 05/27/2011 10:55:03 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Charles Henrickson
We are in a death struggle with the RW powers that be.

Damn You John Boehner!

27 posted on 05/27/2011 10:56:40 PM PDT by mylife
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To: Charles Henrickson

“Reagan was the worst President we ever had by a mile.”
___________________________________________________________

To the Marxist DUmmies, that would certainly be true.
He tore down their wall.


28 posted on 05/27/2011 10:57:08 PM PDT by AlexW (Proud eligibility skeptic)
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To: mylife

“Hmmm... just who did Obama, Geitner and the Ben Bernack bail out hmmm ?
Why is Jeffrey Imelt and GE under a no tax status?
Good Lord these DUers are idiots.
____________________________________________

DUmmies never let facts get in the way of their Communist utopia.


29 posted on 05/27/2011 10:59:38 PM PDT by AlexW (Proud eligibility skeptic)
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To: LUV W

Honest to God, whats the problem with Pat Sajak and how is he manipulating this evil deed?

LoL


30 posted on 05/27/2011 11:01:35 PM PDT by mylife
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To: Roscoe Karns; eyedigress
After he broke a chair over my back at the Zembo Mosque during a tag fight in the Eighties I can't respect him anymore.

If that super-ginormous amazon chick he hangs around with hadn't been there I woulda whupped him, too.

31 posted on 05/27/2011 11:02:57 PM PDT by FredZarguna ("It looks just like a Telefunken U47.....with leather.")
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To: Charles Henrickson
I expect matters to get worse before I die, alas.

You can tell this is a profound thought because he said "alas".

32 posted on 05/27/2011 11:03:37 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: eyedigress

LoL


33 posted on 05/27/2011 11:04:17 PM PDT by mylife
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To: AlexW
Despite their many faults, they are fun to watch ☺
34 posted on 05/27/2011 11:06:12 PM PDT by mylife
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To: FredZarguna
That would be a tough one.....


35 posted on 05/27/2011 11:06:27 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: mylife

The funny part is his uncle called him that, and he asked me the next day. 2 weeks later he blasted me. LOL!


36 posted on 05/27/2011 11:10:03 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: mylife
"Despite their many faults, they are fun to watch ☺" _______________________________________________________ Yes, on one hand they are fun to watch, but on the other hand, it is so sad to think that America has these DUmmies actually living among real Americans. Thank God, they are still a very small minority.
37 posted on 05/27/2011 11:12:55 PM PDT by AlexW (Proud eligibility skeptic)
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To: FredZarguna

I’ve hated him ever since I used to think he was Alex Trebek.


38 posted on 05/27/2011 11:13:07 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: eyedigress

She’s a lot bigger than he is in person, believe me.


39 posted on 05/27/2011 11:18:48 PM PDT by FredZarguna ("It looks just like a Telefunken U47.....with leather.")
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To: mylife
America used to be a great place until Pat Sajak came along.
40 posted on 05/27/2011 11:20:01 PM PDT by FredZarguna ("It looks just like a Telefunken U47.....with leather.")
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To: mylife
America used to be a great place until Pat Sajak came along.
41 posted on 05/27/2011 11:20:05 PM PDT by FredZarguna ("It looks just like a Telefunken U47.....with leather.")
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To: FredZarguna

I do believe you. I don’t get to work with Vanna. He wins.


42 posted on 05/27/2011 11:20:17 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: eyedigress

I hate him for that, too. Thanks for reminding me.


43 posted on 05/27/2011 11:23:51 PM PDT by FredZarguna ("It looks just like a Telefunken U47.....with leather.")
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To: FredZarguna

“There is nothing we as a people can not achieve if we just kill Pat Sajak.” -Abraham Lincoln


44 posted on 05/27/2011 11:25:24 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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To: FredZarguna

The damned Rotter!


45 posted on 05/27/2011 11:27:50 PM PDT by mylife
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To: FredZarguna

Well, don’t hate him. Just figure it out.


46 posted on 05/27/2011 11:28:44 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: Roscoe Karns

The very quote that set off the Ft. Sumpter seige. Very limited in todays history books.


47 posted on 05/27/2011 11:34:02 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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Oops! Sumpter


48 posted on 05/27/2011 11:37:46 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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Without the p


49 posted on 05/27/2011 11:38:49 PM PDT by eyedigress ((Old storm chaser from the west)?)
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To: eyedigress

I think you’re right!


50 posted on 05/27/2011 11:39:40 PM PDT by Roscoe Karns
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