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Presidentís Jobs Speech Wows Congress
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 9 Sep 2011 | John Semmens

Posted on 09/09/2011 6:44:19 PM PDT by John Semmens

President Obama’s widely anticipated speech before a joint session of Congress on Thursday stunned and amazed his erstwhile political opponents.

“Until I heard it from his own lips I never realized how mistaken the GOP plans to tear up all the roads and burn down all the schools were,” said House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Va). “And now that I know the President’s jobs plan is endorsed by the Teamsters’ Jimmy Hoffa and the AFL-CIO’s Richard Trumka, well, let’s just say that my eyes have really been opened.”

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky) admitted that he was skeptical at first. “You know, in a way, we’ve been over this ground before,” McConnell pointed out. “Appropriating hundreds of billions to try to stimulate the economy has been the policy of the current Administration since it took office. Just because it hasn’t worked so far doesn’t necessarily prove it could never work. I’ve got to give him credit for consistency.”

House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) focused on the human element. “It’s one thing to get caught up in the statistics of millions without jobs—that’s bad enough,” Boehner observed. “But when I consider that the fate of one specific individual hangs in the balance I start to get all teary-eyed. If we don’t get this thing turned around, and quick, Barack himself could lose his job next year. I have to ask myself, if government action can save just one job why shouldn’t it be the President’s?”

read more...

http://azconserv1.wordpress.com/2011/09/09/president%e2%80%99s-jobs-speech-wows-congress/


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: cantor; congress; jobs; jobsspeech; johnsemmens; mcconnell; obama; satire; semmens

1 posted on 09/09/2011 6:44:22 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

LOL.


2 posted on 09/09/2011 6:46:04 PM PDT by reagan_fanatic (A communist is just a liberal in a hurry)
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To: 43north; #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 21twelve; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 2ndDivisionVet; 3D-JOY; ...

ping


3 posted on 09/09/2011 6:46:38 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Very good.

:-)


4 posted on 09/09/2011 6:49:46 PM PDT by A CA Guy ( God Bless America, God bless and keep safe our fighting men and women.)
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To: John Semmens

The Dali’Bama has spoken....make it so !

.....:o)

Stay Safe John.


5 posted on 09/09/2011 6:50:05 PM PDT by Squantos (Be polite. Be professional. But have a plan to kill everyone you meet)
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To: John Semmens

LOL


6 posted on 09/09/2011 6:53:09 PM PDT by TribalPrincess2U (Rabid democRATS and 0bama the dictator own it all now.)
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To: John Semmens

[ I have to ask myself, if government action can save just one job why shouldn’t it be the President’s?” ]

LoL... exactly...


7 posted on 09/09/2011 6:55:19 PM PDT by hosepipe (This propaganda has been edited to include some fully orbed hyperbole...)
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To: John Semmens
I have to ask myself, if government action can save just one job why shouldn’t it be the President’s?”

LOL, that IS funny.

8 posted on 09/09/2011 7:03:49 PM PDT by Navy Patriot (Holy flippin' crap, Sarah rocks the world!)
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X

9 posted on 09/09/2011 7:04:42 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (It's never a bad time to FReep this link -- https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate/)
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To: John Semmens

You made my evening.


10 posted on 09/09/2011 7:05:19 PM PDT by pnut22
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To: John Semmens

the Onion?


11 posted on 09/09/2011 7:05:38 PM PDT by DollyCali (Don't tell God how big your storm is... tell your storm how BIG your God is!)
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To: John Semmens

One of the best written in a while John. This stands out in my mind.


12 posted on 09/09/2011 7:09:04 PM PDT by theDentist (fybo; qwerty ergo typo : i type, therefore i misspelll)
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To: John Semmens

Great hilarious piece!


13 posted on 09/09/2011 7:10:56 PM PDT by cajungirl
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To: John Semmens; potlatch; devolve; ntnychik; dixiechick2000

14 posted on 09/09/2011 7:12:39 PM PDT by PhilDragoo (Hussein: Islamo-Commie from Kenya)
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To: John Semmens
if government action can save just one job why shouldn’t it be the President’s?”

LOL

15 posted on 09/09/2011 7:21:00 PM PDT by rawcatslyentist (It is necessary that a person be born of a father who is a citizen; ~Vattel's Law of Nations)
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To: John Semmens

I Luv You, John Semmens! :)


16 posted on 09/09/2011 7:25:34 PM PDT by Diana in Wisconsin (I don't have 'Hobbies.' I'm developing a robust Post-Apocalyptic skill set...)
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To: John Semmens

I thought somebody had gone nuts!...and it’s you! LOL!


17 posted on 09/09/2011 7:31:20 PM PDT by lonestar (It takes a village of idiots to elect a village idiot.)
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To: John Semmens
President’s Jobs Speech Bow Wows Congress
18 posted on 09/09/2011 7:44:37 PM PDT by Texas Fossil (Government, even in its best state is but a necessary evil; in its worst state an intolerable one)
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To: John Semmens

LOL John, with a teary eyed Boehner, and saving the one job you got us laughing in the middle of our fried fish dinner.

Dinner was good by the way, and so is this really good satire. Thanks for the ping. Made my day.


19 posted on 09/09/2011 7:46:35 PM PDT by rockinqsranch (Dems, Libs, Socialists, call 'em what you will, they ALL have fairies livin' in their trees.)
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To: John Semmens

ROTFL. John, that was good.


20 posted on 09/09/2011 8:08:59 PM PDT by IllumiNaughtyByNature ($1.84 - The price of a gallon of gas on Jan. 20th, 2009.)
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To: John Semmens

Great one, John, great ‘quote’ from McConnell


21 posted on 09/09/2011 8:18:24 PM PDT by Chaguito
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To: John Semmens

LOL. Pelosi says the Republicans can never be satisfied. Here we have an uncomplicated one-page bill, and the Republicans want to study it.

Let’s pass this bill so Obama has some more money to distribute.


22 posted on 09/09/2011 8:19:15 PM PDT by Rocky (REPEAL IT!)
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To: John Semmens
It took me until Boehner's statement to catch on. That was funny, and made me all teary eyed. ROFL

Good one John

23 posted on 09/09/2011 8:36:37 PM PDT by annieokie
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To: John Semmens

Beeeyoootifulll!


24 posted on 09/09/2011 8:53:57 PM PDT by REDWOOD99 ("Earth first! We can log the other planets later")
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To: John Semmens

So good the NYT is envious they didn’t write it.


25 posted on 09/09/2011 9:06:35 PM PDT by VRWC For Truth (Throw the bums out who vote yes on the bailout)
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To: John Semmens

LOL John


26 posted on 09/09/2011 9:08:52 PM PDT by wastedyears (Of course you realize, this means war.)
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To: John Semmens

Sir John of the Valley of the Sun: The noblest Bard in all the lands.


27 posted on 09/09/2011 10:16:52 PM PDT by FormerACLUmember
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To: John Semmens

I, too bow before the ONE!— Good one.


28 posted on 09/09/2011 10:35:56 PM PDT by Mark (Don't argue with my posts. I typed while under sniper fire..)
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To: PhilDragoo
Joe, try to look intelligent
A naked Emperor is always good for a few laughs.

Everyone knows that collecting an unemployment check is a job.

Zer0 said government should get out of the way of small business while his administration does the complete opposite.

It's impossible not to laugh at him or the idiots who believe in him.

The DJIA dropped 200 points the second the opening bell rang, and closed down 303 points (Friday, September 9, 2011).

Can one conservative speak about new legislation, like canceling Obamacare, opening all of the energy sources up to exploration and drilling, cutting the corporate tax rate to 15%, take an big axe to federal regulations, put a minimum income tax on all workers for fairness, disband the EPA, set up steep tariffs on China and cut all government departments by 20%.

And... why was there no standing ovation for Joe Wilson when he arrived?

Countdown until Zer0 leaves Office: 497 days as of September 10, 2011.


29 posted on 09/10/2011 12:06:03 AM PDT by BobP (The piss-stream media - Never to be watched again in my house)
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To: John Semmens

Good point about the liberal mindset “just because it hasn’t worked before ...” What does every liberal say when confronted by a total failure of some bone headed law failing to accomplixh its stated goal? “We just didn’t go far enough.” Gun control increases crime (as it always does)? “We just didn’t go far enough.”


30 posted on 09/10/2011 2:51:23 AM PDT by from occupied ga (your own government is your most dangerous enemy)
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To: John Semmens
Just because it hasn’t worked so far doesn’t necessarily prove it could never work. I’ve got to give him credit for consistency.”

The definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Good one. That is like bitching about getting a speeding ticket at the same speed trap every day in one week by the same LEO.

31 posted on 09/10/2011 4:35:25 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (Dear God, please let it rain in Texas. Amen.)
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To: John Semmens

Amazing all right. Amazing how he can come up with a plan that. Is note of the same old tax and spend which has failed fine after time.

Thanks again john for the ping. Super job as always.


32 posted on 09/10/2011 4:06:15 PM PDT by fatnotlazy
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To: John Semmens
Unfazed, Pelosi argued that the added costs “will be good for the economy. The increase in paperwork needed to comply with the regulations requires people to be employed preparing it. That means jobs.

Satire aside, Ms. Pelosi the obedient Keynesian actually does believe this, n'est ce pas?

John S., hopefully you plan to gift some of your columns to the forthcoming Obama Library.

.

33 posted on 09/10/2011 8:48:13 PM PDT by Seaplaner (Never give in. Never give in. Never...except to convictions of honour and good sense. W. Churchill)
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To: John Semmens

LOL! Well done!


34 posted on 09/10/2011 9:15:10 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: BobP
But, but, you are confused...don’tcha’ know that unemployment checks stimulate the economy by taking money from greedy productive workers and businesses (even increasing its value by 1.84 times, if you gently ignore the negative side of the equation...:)), and giving it to those with time on their hands...got that? Even Princess Pelosi declared this to be true and who could conjure up an argument against her Highness’ unparalleled “wisdom?”
35 posted on 09/11/2011 11:22:39 AM PDT by jennings2004 (Sarah Palin: "The bright light at the end of a very dark tunnel!")
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To: John Semmens
"Until I heard it from his own lips I never realized how mistaken the GOP plans to tear up all the roads and burn down all the schools were,” said House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Va).

Now THAT'S funny!

36 posted on 09/13/2011 11:41:15 AM PDT by WayneS (Enlightened statesmen will not always be at the helm. -- James Madison)
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