Posted on 11/30/2011 5:47:28 PM PST by BagCamAddict
I had an affair with Herman Cain.
Mine went on for 15 years, so does that make me the First Wife? Is this Big Love?
But I don't have anything to prove it.
You'll just have to take my word for it.
I'm an upstanding citizen too. But I won't come forward unless there can be a press conference with at least four of us.
Right here.. But mine was longer. 41 years.
Never mind I am only 38..
and Male.
Sure. And I have twenty years of phone records, texts and photos of smoke signals when we went camping.
Contact anyone from the usual suspects(ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, CNN, etc.) and you’ll be on the news and have a book deal within fifteen minutes.
I saw him down the street with two women at once in his car. You never know, it could have been series. Looked like a group smooch was going on.
If he had 100 affairs I’d still vote for him over Romney or Newt .
I did, but I’m sure that he’d totally deny it, the cad.
Raising my hand here. Yes, we were both very drunk, there was dancing on the tables, no one else was there but the two of us, but I remember it like it was oh maybe yesterday.
alinsky’s rules
I did not have Sex with Herman Cain LOL!
I had some Godfather’s Pizza once! Now where’s my check from Soros? (The ***hole whose name comes out the same whether you spell it forward or backwards. Freaky! He’s a spooky dude.)
I just don’t think I can bring myself to relive those painful and degrading years at the hand of this wanton man without Gloria steadying my hand to type and to help dry the tears.
Besides, my bank wants 3 to 5 business days for Axelrods check to clear.
I didn’t, because I like girls. But...I have it on good authority that Cain has been carrying on affairs with various extra-terrestrials since the Pleistocence Era ended. For a small fee I can provide sources.
Any ideas on a hashtag that is easy to remember
I swear I have never met him. And, I have no blue dress. I have no stains.
Besides, I don’t think I would look good in a dress.
I did not have Sex with Herman Cain LOL!
So your the one!
I had 13 1/2 affairs with Herman Cain in 33 seconds in August 1984. He plays fast and loose, he does.
And I can prove it. I just did. I wrote it. I have damning written evidence. And I didn’t want to come forward but everyone else was, so I didn’t want to miss out on the party.
Now, do you want to hear about my affairs with Hussein? With him I had three dozen, back in 1958. And I can prove it.
No, I didn’t have any affairs with Mitt Romney. I don’t think that’s possible for anyone.
Time to ‘fess up. Me, too. Actually me three ‘cuz Elvis was in on it, too.
Could someone direct me to where I can report Mr Cain for stalking. He was an hour away last night in Hillsdale and I was traumatized.
I had Nova Cain once.
I can’t say it was an afair, but he touched me on the leg in a way that I was uncomfortable with. We where in a car. He put his hand neer mine and han he touched me. I said “What are you doing? You know I have a boy friend!”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1AzYLvMrhc
Hey JJ glad you check in this thread turning into classic FR Humor thread get in here ROFL
OH MAN How TMZ get that photo OH THEY PAY LOL!
The question on everyone’s mind.
Has Laz hit it?
I hope you have pics...that would be HUGH!!
Um.... if I knew what a hashtag was..... ??
I’m old.
My friend’s wife admitted to me she had an affair with Herman Cain, while he was in the hospital for his colon cancer operation.
I asked her how that was possible?
She said it’s simple once you put the ground up Viagra in the IV.
It all started when I was working preparing pizzas at a Godfather’s Pizza in Peoria. He came in one day on a corporate visit. He asked if I wanted to see his pepperoni. I was so young and naive...it was a torrid affair after that.
Herb hit on me while he was under anesthesia during his cancer surgery. The guy just can’t help himself.
I was totally appalled.
My dog and I did Herman. I promised to be quiet but I can no longer hold back. My rent is due and I demand payment or else.
Well, it's only been a little different, to be honest, roughly to the extent of one guy winking at me on TV. But it was the best offer I had all evening. All week. Oh, hell, (sob!) ever...
Re: Herman - I’d hit it.
Does that make me a female laz?
(at least that is what the voices in my head tell me...)
Having seen this kind of “scandal” in other settings first-hand, I can assure you that this kind of humor won’t fix a thing.
This won’t go away. It never went away with other politicians, and ole Herman isn’t any different in this regard.
No way. You can’t dance.
I didn’t, but he touched me once when I was a young boy.
Oh, sorry... The MSM would never report that...
Let me try again...
He be black and can’t keep his black hands offa de white women...
Ooopsss.. Sorry, the MSM is already selling that BS...
Let me try again...
JOHNNY EDWARDS HAS A MISTRESS AND LOVE-CHILD!
Ooopsss... The MSM still hasn’t reported that story....
...but they did pronounce him “Father of the Year”...
Let me try again...
CLINTON RAPED JUANITA BROADDRICK...
>>> media crickets <<<<
Did I ever mention that Herman Cain touched me...
Herman Cain sexually harassed me over the television when he was talking about his 999 plan. I could clearly hear him say 69!!!!
I didn’t, but I saw my dog humping his leg back in the ‘80’s.
Well, I’LL confess.
I’m secretly female, and had a 6-1/2 year affair with Herman Cain.
I don’t want any money or anything, just to clear my conscience, which is really painful. I would probably feel better about it if I could just talk to the right media person. Because it would make me feel cleaner to just get it all out in the open. Freepmail me privately for my contact info.
Cain’s the fat guy from New Jersey, right?
I had a gay affair with Herman. People say he is not around here that much, but I am around the corner from a GodFather’s Pizza.
When will the CNN camera’s be here?
</Sarcasm>
I had an affair while watching CITIZEN KANE. Maybe if the movie went on longer than two hours we would have stayed together. :(
I blame Bush.
Where is my wellfare check? And where are the wellfare checks for my 3 dogs?
Humor has a way of fixing most things. Times have changed over the years.
It may not get Herman the nomination, but it does help deal with the irritation of the unproven claims by less than credible accusers who are getting paid to get Obama re-elected.
I did not have sex with that man, Herman Cain!
In my heathen days...I watched...does that count?
With Carmen Hain. Is that close enough?
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