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Pelosi Predicts Court Will Find Obamacare Constitutional
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 March 2012 | John Semmens

Posted on 03/24/2012 2:25:23 PM PDT by John Semmens

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) confidently predicted that the US Supreme Court will rule that the President’s health care law is Constitutional.

“The proof is right there in the Constitution itself where it promises that the government will provide for the people’s rights to life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness,” Pelosi said. “By making sure everyone buys health insurance the law is protecting their lives. By requiring that employers cover birth control costs the law is liberating people from the risks of unwanted pregnancies. And as for pursuit of happiness—isn’t that what those who need birth control are doing?”

To further bolster her case, the former House Speaker contended that “the nation’s founding fathers would’ve written explicit health care legislation into the Constitution if insurance had been invented before they wrote it. Thomas Jefferson, the document’s primary author, could’ve benefited by avoiding the embarrassment of fathering all those children with his slave if he had had access to the kind of birth control drugs and devices now covered by the mandate issued by Secretary Sebelius.”

On top of her historical argument, Pelosi suggested that “the potential political fall-out from making martyrs of women like Sandra Fluke should give the Justices pause. Do they really want to be the ones who say ‘no the government won’t make your employer pay for your birth control?’ The men on the Court would be crucified by the media as misogynistic troglodytes if they did. So, I’m not too worried about how they’ll decide this issue.”

In related news, Representative Jan Schakowsky (D-Ill) reassured critics that the Obamacare edict requiring colleges to provide free sterilization to students “does not mean that we are promoting sterilization. While there are many cogent reasons for doing so—to reduce the human imprint on the environment, for one—there is no intent to make this mandatory at this time.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2012/03/24/pelosi-predicts-court-will-find-obamacare-constitutional/


TOPICS: Government; Health/Medicine; History; Politics
KEYWORDS: constitution; craptire; notworthreading; obamacare; pelosi; satire; stupid; wasteoftime

1 posted on 03/24/2012 2:25:35 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
“The proof is right there in the Constitution itself where it promises that the government will provide for the people’s rights to life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness.”

She is such a Maher.

2 posted on 03/24/2012 2:27:42 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Government is the religion of the sociopath.)
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To: John Semmens

IF it’s found Constitutional...

Get ready for hell!


3 posted on 03/24/2012 2:31:03 PM PDT by unixfox (Abolish Slavery, Repeal The 16th Amendment!)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

She should be in a straight jacket.


4 posted on 03/24/2012 2:31:55 PM PDT by albie
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To: albie

I got taken by the semi-news/semi-satire again.


5 posted on 03/24/2012 2:33:21 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Government is the religion of the sociopath.)
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To: albie

Or a circus cage...


6 posted on 03/24/2012 2:34:10 PM PDT by kcvl
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To: John Semmens
I think she should be impaled on the broom stick she flies around on
7 posted on 03/24/2012 2:39:54 PM PDT by jrd (DO AWAY WITH THE EPA)
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To: John Semmens
One day she will be say,
"It is constitutional to reeducate conservatives and if that doesn't work shoot them"
8 posted on 03/24/2012 2:40:31 PM PDT by Steve Van Doorn (*in my best Eric Cartman voice* 'I love you, guys')
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To: John Semmens

Satire and the real Pelosi are indistinguishable.

I could easily see Ms Insider Trading making these exact comments if pressed.


9 posted on 03/24/2012 2:46:12 PM PDT by FormerACLUmember
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

I did too. What will be interesting to me, is if they do find it (or some parts of it) constitutional, 5-4 decision of course, can the opinion state it in such a way a to fool the public into thinking we are still a constitutional republic of the several states?


10 posted on 03/24/2012 3:02:09 PM PDT by ngat
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To: John Semmens

I would like to see the look on her plastic face when the US Supreme court tosses it out the widow.


11 posted on 03/24/2012 3:03:50 PM PDT by oldenuff2no (Rangers lead the way...... Delta, the original European home land security)
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To: jrd

I was thinking about some innovative uses for that great big gavel she was strutting around with after Obamacare passed ....


12 posted on 03/24/2012 3:05:32 PM PDT by MissMagnolia (Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. (M.Thatcher))
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To: John Semmens
Pelosi doesn't have a clue as to what SCOUTS will do...neither does anyone else.

Every prediction by anyone is at best a shithouse guess these days.

....Pelosi is "hoping" that obamacare will be Constitutional , just like we are hoping that it will be Unconstitutional.

Whichever way it goes,

AND we prevail in the elections, winning the House, Senate and POTUS,

AND if Romney is POTUS AND keeps his word,

AND Boehner and McConnell don't cave....,

obamacare will be repealed....(maybe?...who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of man?)

13 posted on 03/24/2012 3:07:10 PM PDT by B.O. Plenty (Elections have consequences....)
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To: oldenuff2no
I would like to see the look on her plastic face when the US Supreme court tosses it out the widow.

Truly massive doses of Botox will be required, paid for in full by taxpayers through Pelosi's ObamaCare-exempt luxury congressional health insurance.


14 posted on 03/24/2012 3:12:33 PM PDT by FormerACLUmember
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To: John Semmens

If the mandate goes away [and I think it will], Congress ain’t gonna have a way to pay for it ...

See:

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2863348/posts

Also READ the brief - VERY compelling arguments:

http://www.ij.org/images/pdf_folder/amicus_briefs/obamacareamicus.pdf


15 posted on 03/24/2012 3:14:29 PM PDT by Lmo56 (If ya wanna run with the big dawgs - ya gotta learn to piss in the tall grass ...)
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To: John Semmens
“The proof is right there in the Constitution itself where it promises that the government will provide for the people’s rights to life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness,” Pelosi said. “By making sure everyone buys health insurance the law is protecting their lives. By requiring that employers cover birth control costs the law is liberating people from the risks of unwanted pregnancies. And as for pursuit of happiness—isn’t that what those who need birth control are doing?”

She's scared shitless ...

Trying to spin her way to a decision ...

She knows that if the mandate falls, the whole kit and kaboodle goes with it ...

If you are confident of victory - you don't make statements like this ...

16 posted on 03/24/2012 3:19:39 PM PDT by Lmo56 (If ya wanna run with the big dawgs - ya gotta learn to piss in the tall grass ...)
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To: MissMagnolia
I was thinking about some innovative uses for that great big gavel she was strutting around with after Obamacare passed ....

I heard Gallagher retired.

17 posted on 03/24/2012 3:20:10 PM PDT by Riley (The Fourth Estate is the Fifth Column.)
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To: John Semmens

What will the exempt folks do - self-medicate? She’s WAY ahead of the curve.


18 posted on 03/24/2012 3:33:56 PM PDT by Libloather (The epitome of civility.)
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To: Riley
I was thinking about some innovative uses for that great big gavel she was strutting around with after Obamacare passed ....

Cracking her own Balls with it - if the mandate is found to be unconstitutional?

19 posted on 03/24/2012 3:41:57 PM PDT by Lmo56 (If ya wanna run with the big dawgs - ya gotta learn to piss in the tall grass ...)
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To: John Semmens
Ms Pelosi is unbelievably ignorant!
20 posted on 03/24/2012 3:48:13 PM PDT by VietVet (I am old enough to know who I am and what I believe, and I 'm not inclined to apologize for any of)
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To: VietVet

...but this “quote” is political satire.


21 posted on 03/24/2012 3:52:26 PM PDT by VietVet (I am old enough to know who I am and what I believe, and I 'm not inclined to apologize for any of)
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To: MissMagnolia

Didn’t you know? She wears that gavel under her blouse, makes it fit nicer.


22 posted on 03/24/2012 4:11:27 PM PDT by IceAge
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To: IceAge
She wears that gavel under her blouse, makes it fit nicer.

I think Boehner requested that particular gavel ... maybe he should wear it in his trousers, make him look like has a set.

23 posted on 03/24/2012 4:17:06 PM PDT by MissMagnolia (Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. (M.Thatcher))
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To: John Semmens
Nowhere in the constitution does it say “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” That would be the Declaration of Independence. The 14th amendment to the constitution mentions “life, liberty and property” dealing with due process being granted to ex slaves. The 5th amendment has the due process clause and mentions life liberty and property. Nancy Has no clue what she is talking about. Remember this is the lady that said ‘we will have to vote on it to see what is in it.’ When talking to the media about the health care bill.
24 posted on 03/24/2012 4:18:29 PM PDT by political1 (Love your neighbors)
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To: MissMagnolia

Hahaha...good one!


25 posted on 03/24/2012 4:51:34 PM PDT by IceAge
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To: unixfox; ExTexasRedhead; Lazlo in PA; Theodore R.
Here's an interesting contradiction: if the Court upholds Obamacare, it may damage Obama’s chances for reelection. The people who oppose Obamacare will be more motivated to turn out and vote, regardless of who the Republican nominee is.
26 posted on 03/24/2012 7:42:22 PM PDT by Clintonfatigued (A chameleon belongs in a pet store, not the White House)
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To: John Semmens
..... My belief is that the Prez and his cronies have already pulled enough strings and put pressure on enough people to make sure that the fix is in to guarantee that ObamaCare will be found to be constitutional.

But then again ... that would be against the "good guy" rules of conduct for them to do that wouldn't it? ..... They wouldn't play hard ball like that would they? ..... Naaaaaaw.

27 posted on 03/24/2012 8:24:15 PM PDT by R_Kangel
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