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U.S. Court of Appeals upholds charitable deduction for contraception and related items. (satire)
News Satire | April 6, 2012 | Warron Wymen, LLP

Posted on 04/06/2012 3:07:38 PM PDT by zencycler

Warron Wymen LLP
Ivanna Mann and Ugotsta Paye
April 6, 2012

The U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit has ruled that donations made to provide contraception and other related items may be treated as charitible deductions by the the donor. Additionally, the court ruled that costs incurred by the recipient related to the solicitation and maintenance of these donations are also deductible. The decision in Ima Hoor v. Commissioner of the Internal Revenue Service issued April 5, 2012, provides greater clarity to those donating to new charitible groups which, in the wake of the Sandra Fluke testimony to Congress, have begun to receive donations to cover the cost of contraception and related items for struggling, predominantly female, college students.

What Other Deductions are Allowed for Donors?

In addition to allowing deductions for the cost of any form of birth control, the courts are allowing other deductions for some related items. These deductions fall into two categories as follows:

Category 1: Items which delay or prolong the sexual experience will be deductible, since the court determined that such items would increase the likelihood that the participants would remember to use the provided contraception prior to intercourse. Examples of such items would include (but are not limited to) scented candles and romantic music (i.e. a Barry White CD).

Category 2: Items which provide alternatives to intercourse are deductible, as the court determined that these items would be necessary if the participant forgot to take or otherwise lost the donated birth control. Examples of such items include (but are not limited to) KY Jelly and dildos. Note - the court also heard arguments from the lesbian and gay community, who fought for the inclusion of this category to provide for equitable access to resources. The court accepted their argument that since they generally have no need for contraceptive services, this additional category should be included.

What Costs are Deductible for the Recipient?

In the Ima Hoor case, lawyers for Warron Wymen, LLP, the firm representing Ms. Hoor, successfully argued that the cost Ms. Hoor incurred in soliciting and maintaining relationships with her donor should be allowable as an itemized deduction on her tax return. These cost may include (but are not limited to):

1) All costs of mail correspondence with her donors (i.e, stamps, envelopes, etc.)

2) All equipment, supplies and services needed to provide photographs or videos.

3) Replacement costs for memorabilia provided to donors, such as lingerie, bras and panties.

For those interested in participating in these new kinds of charities, here are links and summaries to two such organizations along with excerpts from their websites:

Save The Co-eds

SAVE THE .... CO-EDS!

In the past, our organization sought to help women and young children who were suffering and dying from the effects of war, famine and natural disasters around the world. We told their stories, which were tragic, sometimes shocking, and always heart-wrenching. And we continue to thank you for your kind support.

But as they say, charity begins at home, and now it has come to our attention that there is suffering in this country, deliberately being inflicted on young, innocent, female college students, who have fallen victim to the despicable Republican War on Women. Some of these students are lucky enough to attend secular universities which provide free birth control. But sadly, there are countless students who must every day face the danger of what might happen to them if they decide to have sexual relations, and have run out of the contraception which they can barely afford....

Save The Georgetown Sluts

Save the Georgetown Sluts

About our program-

Welcome to the world of the slut, promising yet gloomy, hopeful, yet in despair. The hand that holds the Cosmo, the procreator, the aborter of tomorrow; a slut shapes the destiny of civilization. Such is the tragic irony of fate, that a beautiful creation such as the slut is today one of the gravest concerns facing humanity, with a volley of congressional hearings, conferences ...and events held for the cause, with topmost world leaders at the helm. Won't you help? For less than the price of a Latte, you too can ensure that a slut will no longer have to choose between a condom or a Cosmo.

How can you sponsor a slut? 1. Start by Searching for a Slut. Search for a slut based on gender, country, or sign. Choose a Girl or Boy (usually called a player) to Sponsor. You can find sluts on college campus, bars, and 'slut walks'


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: charity; fluke; sandra; tax

1 posted on 04/06/2012 3:07:49 PM PDT by zencycler
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To: zencycler

In college even a hint of sex in my direction was a Charitable Contribution...


2 posted on 04/06/2012 3:13:46 PM PDT by freedumb2003 ('RETRO' Abortions = performed on 84th trimester individuals who think killing babies is a "right.")
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