Posted on 04/14/2012 11:09:55 AM PDT by John Semmens
Former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) says she is confident she will regain the gavel when Democrats sweep the November elections.
“Just looking at the top of the ticket has to give every Democrat a sense of optimism,” Pelosi crowed. “On the GOP side we have Mitt Romney—a man who virtually imprisoned his own wife, kept her from seeking gainful employment and used her to breed five children—all sons, mind you. Are women going to vote for this kind of misogynist or are they going to appreciate that before he was president Senator Obama helped his wife get a $300,000 no-show job in addition to gifting her with two lovely daughters?”
“If the comparative life stories of the presidential candidates don’t sway female voters the policy differences ought to,” Pelosi argued. “Democrats have a long record of championing women’s rights. Republicans tout marriage and family as the foundation of our social structure. Democrats have freed women from this trap by ensuring that they can still have children without having to marry a man, that the financial support they need is there for the taking from the generosity of the government.”
“Free food, clothing, and shelter isn’t all we Democrats have given to women,” Pelosi went on. “Thanks to Secretary Sebelius, the government has now mandated free birth control for every woman. And President Obama has appointed two women to the Supreme Court. No other president has done that.”
Pelosi admitted to being buoyed by polls showing that Democrats are favored by 65% of female voters. “The path to government of, by, and for women is clear,” Pelosi said. “Voting for President Obama is a no-brainer. However, he can’t do it alone. We need Democratic majorities in Congress to ensure this transformation won’t be blocked. If women unite to vote their interests the Democratic Party will be running things from here on.”
In related news, according to official records, women on the White House staff are paid 18% less than men. This is okay, though, according to White House Chief of Staff Jack Lew because “most of the men have more years of experience. There’s also the issue of job performance. You can’t just make a gender to gender comparison and conclude that somebody’s getting unfair treatment.”
Ironically, the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Restoration Act passed by a Democratic majority Congress in 2009 requires exactly that comparison and conclusion. Whether this Act will be enforced in this instance is unknown.
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at...
http://azconservative.org/2012/04/14/pelosi-confident-womens-votes-will-mean-democratic-sweep-in-november/
Bar tender! I’ll have what she’s having!
It sounds like Nancy REALLY wants that big gavel back. Bad!
Nancy Pelosi is delusional. It’s a travesty and a crime that she is still one of our lawmakers.
ping
LOL...if someone gave that witch a shot of truth serum, she’d give that speech for real.
It’s satire. But it’s also what the CPUSA really thinks.
(Unless your name is John Semmens, then "making stuff up" is a semi-humorous, semi-scary art form.)
Another nice one John!
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So Pelosi thinks this is a male v. female thing.
The way to respond effectively to the Leftist ideologues is not to humor their pretensions; never to concede their sloganized abuse of Western tradition. The attacks on Ann Romney are absolutely indicative of the deranged, compulsion driven fanaticism, that the Left represents. We should pick up the gauntlet--whether one is a Romney supporter or not--and defend femininity--one of the qualities that Mrs. Pelosi has lost, if she ever had.
William Flax
I recall, just before the 2010 mid-term elections, that Ms. Pelousy confidently predicted that the Dems would easily retain control of the House of Representatives.
Pelosi comes from the school of (non-)thought that holds productivity as something simply to be willed into existence by government. Let's give everybody free money, so nobody will be poor, and then they'll be inspired to produce and create whatever society needs. Qualifications don't matter - just pay people and see what they can do. :)
“Are you serious?”
Uuuuhhh, that’s $300,000 per annum, so there’s no confusion....:))
JOHN , love you talent and artistic flair.
Your Nancy P should look up and read the Humor Dictionary definition of a “Tongue”! Then only use hers for that primary purpose, never the secondary.
“tongue is a sex organ sometimes used for talking”
I am confident she will be residing in an institution or prison.
Another one over the fence.
Nasty Peelousi should never play poker, its too easy to see though her bluff.
She’s wishin in one hand and poopin in the other wondering which will fill up first.
Not many days go by on FR before I have to double-check to see if a news item is satire or not. The line between satire and “legit” news is getting blurrier all the time.
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