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Top Ten Ways To Keep Women From Voting
Set Our Children Free ^ | 7/25/12 | Tony Caruso

Posted on 07/27/2012 12:57:11 PM PDT by Guido2012

It is clear that the easiest path to victory for Republicans this Fall would be to keep women from voting. Why? According the latest CBS New York Times poll, Romney leads by eight points among men, and Obama leads by five points among women, including a 2-to-1 edge among single women. That’s why I’ve compiled an easy-to-use, tongue-in-cheek, Top Ten Ways to Keep Women from Voting list, with apologies to David Letterman.

(Excerpt) Read more at setourchildrenfree.com ...


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: bho2012; dncstrategy; election; humor; voting; women; womensvote
It is clear that the easiest path to victory for Republicans this Fall would be to keep women from voting. Why? According the latest CBS New York Times poll, Romney leads by eight points among men, and Obama leads by five points among women, including a 2-to-1 edge among single women. These numbers are really no surprise, since they’ve been relatively consistent for an entire generation now. Women tend to vote Democrat, men Republican. A candidate who promises security from cradle to grave, a feminist/child centered agenda, moral relativism, and appears compassionate (“I feel your pain”) and good-looking appeals to many women. On the other hand, the concepts of liberty, personal responsibility, low taxes, and limited government appeal to most men.

So the no-brainer question becomes, “How can we keep women from the polls this November?” I mean, why spend gazillions of dollars on negative campaign ads, constant travel to swing states, expensive campaign staff, and get-out-the-vote efforts, when what we really need to do is concentrate on a suppress-the-female-vote effort. The Founding Fathers did their part by denying women the right to vote, but then we blew it by ratifying the 19th Amendment. Men of America unite! It is not only your right, but your duty to keep the woman in your life from voting. Yes, it’s really that simple. That’s why I’ve compiled an easy-to-use, tongue-in-cheek, Top Ten Ways to Keep Women from Voting list, with apologies to David Letterman.

10. Pay them. Say what? That’s illegal you say? Relax. The Democrats have been paying people to vote for their candidates for decades. These voters are called public employee unions and they’re paid with your tax money.

9. Take her out for a romantic dinner the night before election day. Tell her that you are swept away with her beauty, that you feel that you haven’t been spending enough time together, and that on sheer impulse you want to take her to some fabulous world-class restaurant 50+ miles from home. While away, your car “mysteriously” breaks down, and you have to spend the night and all of the next day getting it back on the road. You, of course, have already voted by absentee ballot.

8. Show them Romney is flawed. Right now, Romney’s personal image is too squeaky clean - great father, husband, intelligent, successful, etc. In other words, he’s not flawed enough for women to want to save him. I submit to you Bill Clinton, OK? Remember all the women in your life who’ve dumped you for some womanizing, loser, biker guy, with tattoos, an earring, and no job? Women think they can rescue guys like this, but a guy like Mitt Romney doesn’t need these compassionate women, so he’s boring. Tell them Romney cheated on Ann, and his love child was Brad Pitt, but the press is keeping it silent. You’ll get a two-fer here. Not only will they be attracted to Romney and maybe consider voting for him, but they may even vote for him because they feel sorry for Ann.

7. Tie her to the bed. Tell her you are so passionate for her that you want her to be your sex slave for 24 hours (the night before the election until the night after). Yeah, I know. But sacrifices have to be made for the cause, and somebody’s gotta do it.

6. Sabotage early or absentee voting. If you’re voting by absentee ballot, offer to mail it in for her, and then don’t. If you’re in a state that allows early voting, go vote the first day of early voting and tell her the machines weren’t working in your precinct resulting in long lines, and they expect them to fixed by the official election day. On the actual election day, however, employ one of the other strategies listed here.

5. Buy her a trip to Acapulco. Say that you got an unbelievable bargain that’s good for the week of Nov. 6th for one person only, and that you unselfishly decided to give it to her, and that she owes it to herself. Tell her to just go and relax, get a massage every day, and treat herself like a queen. She deserves it.

4. Turn off or disable the water supply to her home the night before Nov. 6th. Tell her you’ll call the plumber (you don’t) but ask her to wait until he shows up (which he won’t). In the meantime, she’ll have no way to take a shower or go to work or go out to vote. By the time she realizes the plumber is not coming, you will have “fixed” the problem, but not in time for her to vote.

3. Have a sale on election day. This will require the cooperation of all store merchants in your area, but most of them don’t like Obama anyway, and they’ll be glad to cooperate. Of course, it has to be a REALLY big sale, selling items way below cost, and has to run the entire day until polls close. The business owners can be compensated for their losses with the money saved from campaign advertising.

2. Change your calendar to last years’ calendar. Circle Tuesday, Nov. 8th (instead of Nov. 6th, this year’s election day) and remind her to vote. When she finds out, feign surprise and regret that you weren’t able to vote either (which you did).

1. Send her a fake sweepstakes winner’s notice. She just won an all-expense paid trip to Las Vegas (on the first week of November) to party, see the shows, and meet celebrities. She is allowed to take one friend (a girlfriend, not you), and her tickets can be picked up at the airport on Nov. 6th at 8:00 A.M. Once there, have her paged by a guy friend she doesn’t know, who tells her that her flight will be delayed until that evening. When she finally finds out that there is no free vacation, commiserate with her about these awful “scams.” The beauty of this is that it costs you nothing, and you eliminate, not one, but two female voters.

Gentlemen, your country needs you. If we all do our part, we can de-feminize this nation, and return it to greatness.

1 posted on 07/27/2012 12:57:15 PM PDT by Guido2012
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To: Guido2012

Women value security over freedom. Men value freedom over security.

It’s why I’ve called the Democratic party the women’s party since the mid-80’s.


2 posted on 07/27/2012 1:04:01 PM PDT by cuban leaf (Were doomed! Details at eleven.)
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To: Guido2012

Why do so many women vote dem? Do they not love their children or even consider their futures? Is there much self respect in these women?

My son heard something on tv once about food stamps etc. and asked me why I didn’t do that. I told him I would be stealing from his future by participating. Are there that many other women who cannot understand this simple fact?


3 posted on 07/27/2012 1:05:29 PM PDT by formosa (Formosa)
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To: cuban leaf

And even then it is really the “single” women’s party. If you divide up the women between married and single, I’ll bet Obama’s popularity with single women is staggering.


4 posted on 07/27/2012 1:10:08 PM PDT by cuban leaf (Were doomed! Details at eleven.)
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To: Guido2012

#11 Put them in a round room and tell them the door is in the corner.


5 posted on 07/27/2012 1:15:24 PM PDT by ImJustAnotherOkie (zerogottago)
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To: cuban leaf

Which is why only married or widowed heads of households should be allowed to vote.


6 posted on 07/27/2012 1:17:12 PM PDT by Arthur McGowan (In Edward Kennedy's America, federal funding of brothels is a right, not a privilege.)
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To: cuban leaf

Women value security over freedom. Men value freedom over security.

It’s why I’ve called the Democratic party the women’s party since the mid-80’s.

Depends on the women, there are a lot more conservative women out there than you realize.


7 posted on 07/27/2012 1:17:52 PM PDT by GraceG
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To: cuban leaf

I have always heard that many women subconsiously vote for the more attractive of the two candidates. This goes back to Warren Harding.


8 posted on 07/27/2012 1:18:09 PM PDT by The Kingwood Kid (Texan by birth, Republican by choice)
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To: Guido2012

Announce the annual sale at Filenes basement.


9 posted on 07/27/2012 1:23:33 PM PDT by Daveinyork
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To: Guido2012

We never should have given them the right to vote in the first place.


10 posted on 07/27/2012 1:38:40 PM PDT by donhunt (Certified and proud "Son of a Bitch".)
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To: formosa
Why do so many women vote dem?

I wish I knew. But I wonder if men to some degree need to assume some responsibility. Here's why I say that.

There are an awful lot of men out there who have failed miserably at being the loving servant-leader they are called to be in scripture. God created women, so He knows better than anyone what women need.

The Dems are good at pretending they care about women (even though they don't) Perhaps women are starved for someone to care for and protect them, so they buy into the lie.

I know there are a lot of wonderful guys on FR. But I've also seen some pretty hateful screeds against women. If a woman was starved for the kind of servant leadership God created her to need, why would she want to side with the positions that kind of guy holds?

11 posted on 07/27/2012 1:38:52 PM PDT by MEGoody (Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.)
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To: donhunt

By that logic, blacks shouldn’t be allowed to vote either ... since they vote much higher majority for Dems.


12 posted on 07/27/2012 1:48:51 PM PDT by Lorianne (fedgov, taxporkmoney)
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To: Guido2012

If you live in Wash. or Oregon, get the mail every day so you can vote both your and your husband’s ballot and mail them back before he realizes that he never got to vote.


13 posted on 07/27/2012 1:54:28 PM PDT by sportutegrl
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To: Guido2012

Next, let’s make a list of ways to keep men from buying/owning/using guns. Most problems with guns are caused by men, and based on your list, you’re not to keen on respecting Constitutional Amendments. Might be worth a shot. So to speak, anyway.


14 posted on 07/27/2012 2:10:46 PM PDT by coop71 (Being a redhead means never having to say you're sorry...)
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To: donhunt; Guido2012

Women traditionally voted more republican than men, white women still vote republican.

Women voted for Nixon in 1960, men went for JFK, which led to the passing of JFK’s immigration dream, and resulted in the eventual end of America.

“However, if there is one man who can take the most credit for the 1965 act, it is John F. Kennedy. Kennedy seems to have inherited the resentment his father Joseph felt as an outsider in Boston’s WASP aristocracy. He voted against the McCarran-Walter Act of 1952, and supported various refugee acts throughout the 1950s. In 1958 he wrote a book, A Nation of Immigrants, which attacked the quota system as illogical and without purpose, and the book served as Kennedy’s blueprint for immigration reform after he became president in 1960. In the summer of 1963, Kennedy sent Congress a proposal calling for the elimination of the national origins quota system. He wanted immigrants admitted on the basis of family reunification and needed skills, without regard to national origin. After his assassination in November, his brother Robert took up the cause of immigration reform, calling it JFK’s legacy. In the forward to a revised edition of A Nation of Immigrants, issued in 1964 to gain support for the new law, he wrote, “I know of no cause which President Kennedy championed more warmly than the improvement of our immigration policies.” Sold as a memorial to JFK, there was very little opposition to what became known as the Immigration Act of 1965.”


15 posted on 07/27/2012 2:15:45 PM PDT by ansel12 (Massachusetts Governors,,, where the GOP goes for it's "conservative" Presidential candidates.)
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To: cuban leaf
And even then it is really the “single” women’s party. If you divide up the women between married and single, I’ll bet Obama’s popularity with single women is staggering.

Yes, and yes:

Unmarried women—a group that includes single, separated, divorced, or widowed women—voted for Obama over Republican opponent John McCain by a whopping 70 to 29 percent in yesterday's election, according to numbers released today by Women's Voices Women Vote, a nonpartisan organization.

Married women, by contrast, preferred McCain by a slim 3 percentage-point margin, 50 to 47 percent.

http://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2008/11/05/behind-obamas-victory-women-open-up-a-record-marriage-gap

16 posted on 07/27/2012 2:18:58 PM PDT by Random_User_250
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To: Guido2012

I recently heard a woman say, “I’ll vote for Romney because he’s a Democrat.”

I didn’t correct her, of course.


17 posted on 07/27/2012 3:18:12 PM PDT by Jyotishi (Seeking the truth, a fact at a time.)
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To: Random_User_250

Plus white women went 53% for McCain in 2008.


18 posted on 07/27/2012 3:31:19 PM PDT by ansel12 (Massachusetts Governors,,, where the GOP goes for it's "conservative" Presidential candidates.)
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To: formosa

If you create a baby without a father in the family, you latch on to the Big Daddy government for support and protection.
The welfare state turns men into transitory studs, unemployed criminals or permanently “disabled”. It makes the women dependent upon the state while destroying the men who would otherwise step up.


19 posted on 07/27/2012 8:56:17 PM PDT by tbw2
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