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DUmmie FUnnies 08-17-12 (DUmmie darkangel218 DUmps her RW BF)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | August 17, 2012 | DUmmie darkangel218, DUmmies, and Charles Henrickson

Posted on 08/17/2012 1:59:00 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson

You remember Sarah Ibarruri, aka Sarah Ibuprofen? She was the DUmmie who was dating a right-wing boyfriend, and she was very conflicted about it. On the one hand, her boyfriend was smart, had money, and treated Sarah with love and kindness. On the other hand, he had right-wing political views. What to do? What to do??

Well, now we have another DUmmieland damsel in distress. She is DUmmie darkangel218, and she too had fallen for a right-wing boyfriend. I guess it's because we conservative men are all tall, good-looking, employed, with 6% body fat, that all the hippie chicks fall for us. Their prog boys are all such weak widdle wusses. The DUmmie girls simply cannot suppress their Real Inner Woman, which longs for a strong retrosexual male.

Be that as it may, now DUmmie darkangel218 has finally had enough! She is THROUGH with her man! "A Reich-winger? ICK! Patooey! What was I thinking??" DUmmie darkangel218 declares her independence here in this THREAD, the elegantly titled "Today i told my rw bf to f*** off."

So let us now enter the soap opera of non-soap-users, the DUmb and the Restless, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, reminding you that even in DUmmieland there's a lid for every pothead, is in the [brackets]:

Today i told my rw bf to f*** off

[A right-wing boyfriend?? Ick! How did you ever let it get that far in the first place??]

I can't stand his idiocy anymore.

[It's getting in the way of MY idiocy!]

I can't stand his lies and selfishness any longer. Last night I had a bad night, and my idiot half blew me off because he had to listen to Coast to Coast am.

[Let's see, Coast to Coast AM or DUmmie darkangel218 . . . Which would I rather listen to? Which would be more in touch with reality? Hmmm. . . .]

He's a truck driver. . . .

[He's in the DUmp truck now!]

He couldn't even stay on the phone w me on my drive home.

[Just a thought, but maybe it's because he's driving a sixteen-ton truck, and he wants to keep both hands on the wheel.]

Why I'm posting this is not just to vent.

[It's to take applications for a new boyfriend.]

It's to remind everyone to STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF, DON'T BE AFRAID TO BE WHOI YOU ARE, AND CALL OUT HYPOCRISY WHEN YOU SEE IT.

[AND USE CAPS LOCK WHENEVER POSSIBLE.]

I couldn't even put my Obama sticker on my car because of him,.but guess what, from now on it will be covered in them!

[Take THAT, rw x-bf!!]

RWs are all the same, selfish, f up liars! May they rot in hell, if whatever sh*thole rotten souls like theirs will go to!

[Hell hath no fury like a woman unstickered!]

Long live the Democratic Party! Long live Freedom! Long live USA!

[One of these things is not like the others, one of these things is not the same. . . .]

[Now her fellow DUmmies commiserate with darkangel218 . . .]

Glad you did this. . . .

[What were you waiting for??]

Keep the faith, and feel 100,000 Du hugs!

[Ewww! Ick!!]

i had 11 stickers on my car during 2004 election and my republican hubby didnt say a word. as a matter of fact, as often as it was brought up, he would chuckle about my car. and often pointed it out to his buddies.

["Hey, guys! See all those Kerry-Edwards stickers on my wife's car? I let her have those. It keeps her quiet, we all know Kerry's gonna lose anyway, and I get all I want in the sack! C'mon, gimme five!"]

Take a big breath of fresh clean air and yell "I feel good" or what ever makes you smile. Good riddance to the mill stone.

[Free at last! Free at last! Thank Gaia almighty, I'm free at last!]

Maybe you will meet smeone new here on DU. . . .

[DUmmie GreenPartyVoter starts hitting on darkangel218. The line forms in the back, boys!]

So glad to hear this, my sister. . . . Here's hoping you find someone who respects your point of view.

[DUmmie Jack Sprat gets in line.]

Sounds like you made the right decision but you shouldn't be talking on the phone while you drive.

[We may have to report you to the Nanny State, darkangel218.]

I just assumed she was hands free. Democrats are responsible folk.

[IRONY ALERT: This DUmmie, a proponent of safe driving, has an avatar of . . . get this . . . TED KENNEDY!]

I hope he's good and dumped (I'm female. . . .)

[I'll hit on you too, darkangel! This is DUmmieland, after all.]

Coast to Coast was a good one last night

[Is that you, rw x-bf?]

the couple of times I listened it was alien abduction.

["'darkangel218'? An ancient alien, of course. 'darkangel'? Nighttime, coming down from the sky. '218'? The year she first arrived."]

Used to really love C2C when Art Bell hosted.

Fwiw, Art Bell voted for Obama.

[Ask not for whom the Bell polls.]

I loved Art Bell. Such an entertainer!

[He's the Joe Biden of radio!]

STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF

[Do NOT listen to Coast to Coast, darkangel218! Art Bell's not on it anymore! And do not listen to what that Aliens hair guy says about you!]

Sending hugs.

[Sending alien thought beams. . . .]

starting a personal journal/diary always helps!

[Dear diary, Today I put Obama bumper stickers all over my car! I feel so proud of myself! I feel LIBERATED! Tonight I'm going to drive around in my car and talk on my cell phone and show THE WORLD where I stand! Obama 2012, baby! Who needs that lousy old truck driver anyway? I've got my bumper stickers!! Self-hug, d.a.]

A truck driver is exactly the kind of guy that will be screwed under the GOP. I can't understand how people like this can support Republicans.

[I can't IMAGINE how increased oil production, lower fuel prices, and more favorable policies toward business could POSSIBLY help truck drivers!]

Back when I was a dating man, my new girlfriend was always much better than my last one was, so keep that in mind as you ply the darkness of loneliness.

[I think DUmmie madokie would like to ply darkangel.]

I hope you can savor your solitude. It may not last long.

[Take a number!]

GOOD FOR YOU! Ha! I have a RW GF and surprisingly we get along fairly well. We just dont talk politics. IF she acts up when BO gets re-elected... She'll get the boot!

[DUmmie Snoozin, putting the BO in BOOT!]

BE YOU!

[You go, girl! Pile on those stickers! Don't worry, darkangel218, you'll find another boyfriend. Which reminds me . . . What about dateless DUmmie steve2470? He has to ride the bus--he'd appreciate a girl with a car. And he has numbers in his name! A match made in DUmmie heaven!]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dufu; dummie; dummiefunnies; dummies
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DUmmie darkangel218 is off to a good start:


1 posted on 08/17/2012 1:59:10 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson
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To: Charles Henrickson

IBTP!


2 posted on 08/17/2012 1:59:39 PM PDT by Not A Snowbird (Eat Mor Chikin!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Oh my, that car!


3 posted on 08/17/2012 2:02:11 PM PDT by Spirit of Liberty (If you build it, Obama wants credit!)
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To: Charles Henrickson
He couldn't even stay on the phone w me on my drive home.

She sounds like an obsessive clinger to me.
4 posted on 08/17/2012 2:02:20 PM PDT by cripplecreek (What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul?)
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To: PJ-Comix; Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; ...

PING!


5 posted on 08/17/2012 2:03:46 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Tall, good-looking, employed, with 6% body fat)
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To: Charles Henrickson

IJATP!


6 posted on 08/17/2012 2:06:21 PM PDT by freedumb2003 (obozo could bring back literal slavery with chains and still he will get 85+% of the black vote)
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To: cripplecreek

He wanted her to get off the phone so she wouldn’t crash the car, I’d say.


7 posted on 08/17/2012 2:07:12 PM PDT by Olog-hai
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To: Charles Henrickson
BTW, who was on Coast to Coast last night??
8 posted on 08/17/2012 2:09:37 PM PDT by Spirit of Liberty (If you build it, Obama wants credit!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Who, on Gaea’s Green Earth could possible link C2C with conservatism.

C2C is hilarious, mind you, but conspiracy theories are the bailiwick of the left, not the right.


9 posted on 08/17/2012 2:09:55 PM PDT by freedumb2003 (obozo could bring back literal slavery with chains and still he will get 85+% of the black vote)
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To: Spirit of Liberty
BTW, who was on Coast to Coast last night?

This is Mork calling Art. Come in Art...

10 posted on 08/17/2012 2:11:48 PM PDT by freedumb2003 (obozo could bring back literal slavery with chains and still he will get 85+% of the black vote)
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To: Charles Henrickson
There is a reason these poor liberal heterosexual women have to date conservative men.

The men on DU don't want to date them, they want to borrow their shoes.

11 posted on 08/17/2012 2:18:18 PM PDT by 5thGenTexan
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To: Charles Henrickson
Why I'm posting this is not just to vent. [It's to take applications for a new boyfriend.]

Pics needed plz.

12 posted on 08/17/2012 2:25:53 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Only Obama put a dog on the roof of his mouth. Dogs are friends, not food.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I’m confused. Did she break up with him because of lies, selfishness, hypocrisy, or because he was more interested in Coast to Coast?


13 posted on 08/17/2012 2:27:08 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Only Obama put a dog on the roof of his mouth. Dogs are friends, not food.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
I couldn't even put my Obama sticker on my car because of him,.but guess what, from now on it will be covered in them!


14 posted on 08/17/2012 2:30:03 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Only Obama put a dog on the roof of his mouth. Dogs are friends, not food.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
So glad to hear this, my sister. . . . Here's hoping you find someone who respects your point of view. [DUmmie Jack Sprat gets in line.]

Jack Sprat is dating his sister?

Ewww! Ick!!!

15 posted on 08/17/2012 2:32:32 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Only Obama put a dog on the roof of his mouth. Dogs are friends, not food.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Back when I was a dating man, my new girlfriend was always much better than my last one was, so keep that in mind as you ply the darkness of loneliness.

That was, until he got married (or gave up dating altogether). Then it was his last girlfriend who was the best.

16 posted on 08/17/2012 2:35:59 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Only Obama put a dog on the roof of his mouth. Dogs are friends, not food.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

C2C is beyond wacky.

The truck driving boyfriend could at least pay for their dates. She’ll be lucky to go Dutch if she starts dating a fellow lib.

But then again, very few Libs live by the policies they advocate so maybe she’ll find a tenured college professor.


17 posted on 08/17/2012 2:36:17 PM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Ha! I have a RW GF and surprisingly we get along fairly well. We just dont talk politics. IF she acts up when BO gets re-elected... She'll get the boot!

Democrats' War on Women, BUMP.

18 posted on 08/17/2012 2:37:16 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Only Obama put a dog on the roof of his mouth. Dogs are friends, not food.)
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To: 5thGenTexan
"There is a reason these poor liberal heterosexual women have to date conservative men.

The men on DU don't want to date them, they want to borrow their shoes".

LOL! Good one. And you know what? You're probably right.

19 posted on 08/17/2012 2:44:08 PM PDT by StormEye
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To: freedumb2003
I like listening to C2C when I'm gaming online...pure entertainment. I always try to picture George Noory's facial expressions at some of the callers he gets.

That said, C2C has been a staple of many a late-night worker for years. Makes for lolz with co-workers as you fight to stay awake.

20 posted on 08/17/2012 2:48:02 PM PDT by thescourged1
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