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Why Grown Men Walk Around Wearing Football Jerseys
Deadspin ^ | 9/5/2012 | Drew Magary

Posted on 09/05/2012 1:33:25 PM PDT by mojito

....I have a jersey I wear when my team plays on Sundays. It's not a good jersey. It's a lame-ass replica jersey I bought because I was too cheap to spring for the real deal. But I wear it. And do I feel like a stallion when I wear it? I DO. I totally do, even though I look like every other middle-aged man wearing an NFL jersey he shouldn't be wearing. I feel like I'm part of the team, which is just absurd.

NFL fans walk around in team jerseys all the time, and even though most of them look like schlubs, most of them FEEL better than they do at any other time of the week. In fact, the fatter and more out of shape you are, the more powerful a spell the jersey casts over your ego. Maybe you look like a real player. Maybe the head coach will be in dire need of a running back in the fourth quarter, see you through the TV screen, and summon you out to the field to go rip off the winning 90-yard swing pass. That will never happen, but the jersey is what lets you dream about it, and often the dream is vivid enough to make a decent substitute for reality. Which is good, because in reality you're fat and your team sucks.

So if you have a jersey sitting in your drawer, I beseech you to take it out right now and throw it on. Don't apologize for it. Don't worry about your girlfriend telling you that you look pathetic. She doesn't get it, man. She doesn't understand the POWER of the jersey. But you do. You put that jersey on and you get yourself fired the f**k up, because the NFL season starts TONIGHT....

(Excerpt) Read more at deadspin.com ...


TOPICS: Humor; Sports
KEYWORDS: nfl
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Happy Kickoffs everyone!

*The article at the link contains quite a bit of obscene, but sometimes hilarious language. Be warned.

1 posted on 09/05/2012 1:33:29 PM PDT by mojito
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To: mojito
fat steelers chick Pictures, Images and Photos

Hey, it's not just men, sometime those outfits can cover alot of...girth.

2 posted on 09/05/2012 1:36:10 PM PDT by Snickering Hound
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To: mojito

NFL? Oh that’s different. I thought they meant my Doug Flutie #22 jersey.


3 posted on 09/05/2012 1:36:57 PM PDT by massgopguy (I owe everything to George Bailey)
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To: mojito

Why do grown men walk around in flip flops, shorts, t-shirts, keds, bizarre facial hair, piercings, tattooes, and fat guts?

Like Mark Steyn said, Adults today look just like they did in 1950, only fatter and dressed exactly like children.


4 posted on 09/05/2012 1:40:13 PM PDT by Doctor 2Brains (If the government were Paris Hilton, it could not score a free drink in a bar full of lonely sailors)
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To: Snickering Hound

Is that the blimp getting ready for tonight’s coverage?


5 posted on 09/05/2012 1:41:38 PM PDT by Batman11 (We came for the chicken sandwiches and a Sweet Tea Party broke out!)
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To: Doctor 2Brains

On a lighter note, it IS finally football season. Channelling John Facenda, “It was a day of punishment in a league of pain...”

At least until that peter-puffin’ little scumbag Roger Goodell came along and started postponing games because of SNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’ve seen my little girl’s SOCCER league play in the snow!!!!!!


6 posted on 09/05/2012 1:43:50 PM PDT by Doctor 2Brains (If the government were Paris Hilton, it could not score a free drink in a bar full of lonely sailors)
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To: Doctor 2Brains

“These gods of Autumn.”


7 posted on 09/05/2012 1:45:01 PM PDT by massgopguy (I owe everything to George Bailey)
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To: Doctor 2Brains

I shouldn’t wear shorts or t-shirts?


8 posted on 09/05/2012 1:47:39 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: massgopguy

“They scored the most, allowed the fewest, and dished out such punishment along the way, they came to be known as the Purple Gang.”

“Lombardi—a certain magic still lingers in the very name; it speaks of duels in the snow and cold November mud.”


9 posted on 09/05/2012 1:48:45 PM PDT by Doctor 2Brains (If the government were Paris Hilton, it could not score a free drink in a bar full of lonely sailors)
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To: mojito

I never understood why grown men would walk around wearing a jersey with another man’s name on it. Seems kind of childish to me.


10 posted on 09/05/2012 1:49:26 PM PDT by Carpe Cerevisi
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To: EEGator

Well, Doc Holliday, Indiana Jones, and Chesty Puller never did... :)


11 posted on 09/05/2012 1:51:07 PM PDT by Doctor 2Brains (If the government were Paris Hilton, it could not score a free drink in a bar full of lonely sailors)
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To: mojito

gotta think...most of the people/ walking around today are the offspring of the people? of the ‘60s and l8r...and we wonder what happened...

Semper Remembering!
*****


12 posted on 09/05/2012 1:51:46 PM PDT by gunnyg ("A Constitution changed from Freedom, can never be restored; Liberty, once lost, is lost forever...)
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To: mojito
I don't own an NFL jersey, but I do wear my Rogue Rich Froning shirt during the Games.

The joke's on me, though, since he doesn't wear a shirt when he competes...

13 posted on 09/05/2012 1:54:12 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater (CrossFit.com)
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To: mojito
The jersey I stole from high school USED to make me feel young.

Sigh... now it looks just as old and nasty as I do.

14 posted on 09/05/2012 1:54:16 PM PDT by Slump Tester (What if I'm pregnant Teddy? Errr-ahh -Calm down Mary Jo, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it)
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To: Doctor 2Brains

You know how to dig the knife in deep. :)


15 posted on 09/05/2012 1:55:32 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: EEGator

Just funnin!


16 posted on 09/05/2012 1:57:02 PM PDT by Doctor 2Brains (If the government were Paris Hilton, it could not score a free drink in a bar full of lonely sailors)
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To: Future Snake Eater

You should wear an Annie Thorisdottir shirt.


17 posted on 09/05/2012 1:57:29 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: Carpe Cerevisi
I don't understand why people who aren't actual cowboys wear cowboy boots and cowboy hats. Then again clothing is a personal preference, and as long as all the "bits" are covered I could care less what anyone wears;-)

I have no NFL jerseys, but I do like to wear my Red Wings jerseys in the winter. They are called sweaters for a reason. I also like wearing my baseball jerseys. One is a NNOB Cubs jersey. The others are game-worn Negro League throwbacks. They are very comfortable to wear.

18 posted on 09/05/2012 1:57:51 PM PDT by Chipper (You can't kill an Obamazombie by destroying the brain...they didn't have one to begin with.)
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To: Doctor 2Brains

Val Kilmer as Doc Holliday is my all time favorite character.


19 posted on 09/05/2012 1:58:59 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: EEGator

What you don’t want to wear a wool suit in 90 degree, 70% humidity weather, to the store?


20 posted on 09/05/2012 2:00:14 PM PDT by Chipper (You can't kill an Obamazombie by destroying the brain...they didn't have one to begin with.)
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To: EEGator

Commando?


21 posted on 09/05/2012 2:00:14 PM PDT by Darteaus94025
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To: Chipper

It does sound appealing now that you mention it.


22 posted on 09/05/2012 2:02:59 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: mojito

Jersies are comfortable. But I don’t get the full-on NBA outfit.


23 posted on 09/05/2012 2:03:34 PM PDT by gundog (Help us, Nairobi-Wan Kenobi...you're our only hope.)
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To: Darteaus94025

Commando is dangerous with khaki shorts and 90+ degree temps.


24 posted on 09/05/2012 2:03:53 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: EEGator

I tried...it’s too big.


25 posted on 09/05/2012 2:04:17 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater (CrossFit.com)
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To: EEGator

My all time favorite, period, end of story, no debate whatsoever. The single greatest cinematic achievement in all the entire history of film. “I’m your huckleberry. That’s just my game.”


26 posted on 09/05/2012 2:04:17 PM PDT by Doctor 2Brains (If the government were Paris Hilton, it could not score a free drink in a bar full of lonely sailors)
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To: Snickering Hound

I see yinz are Stiller fans n’at....

;-)


27 posted on 09/05/2012 2:04:23 PM PDT by Emperor Palpatine (I need a good stiff drink. How 'bout you?)
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To: Snickering Hound

A Good read. I used to wear my Jersey after I stopped playing but then the wife decided it was hot to wear it as a night gown - it was but I never wore it again!

Mel


28 posted on 09/05/2012 2:04:46 PM PDT by melsec (Once a Jolly Swagman camped by a Billabong....)
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To: Snickering Hound

She beat anorexia!


29 posted on 09/05/2012 2:07:30 PM PDT by DuncanWaring (The Lord uses the good ones; the bad ones use the Lord.)
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To: Doctor 2Brains

It seems we’re on the same page.


30 posted on 09/05/2012 2:08:57 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: Carpe Cerevisi
I never understood why grown men would walk around wearing a jersey with another man’s name on it. Seems kind of childish to me.

You wanna wear the name of your team or city, that's one thing. You get your picture taken with your favorite athlete, movie star or politician, that's ok, too (as long as it's free). But wearing a shirt with another guy's name on it it just seems..well..a bit demeaning.
31 posted on 09/05/2012 2:12:23 PM PDT by Krankor (Green-eyed lady, lovely lady Strolling slowly towards the sun)
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To: Future Snake Eater

She’s a tough one, but I bet you’re bigger than 5’8” 147lbs.


32 posted on 09/05/2012 2:13:37 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: Doctor 2Brains
No doubt, TOMBSTONE is the greatest film ever made. I have it on VHS tape, DVD, Director's cut DVD, and Blu-ray.
33 posted on 09/05/2012 2:15:17 PM PDT by Inyo-Mono (My greatest fear is that when I'm gone my wife will sell my guns for what I told her I paid for them)
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To: Inyo-Mono

No Betamax?!?


34 posted on 09/05/2012 2:17:17 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: EEGator

Yeah, I’m just kidding. I am in the market for a Julie Foucher pinup, so if you see anything...


35 posted on 09/05/2012 2:17:24 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater (CrossFit.com)
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To: Future Snake Eater

bttt


36 posted on 09/05/2012 2:17:49 PM PDT by ConservativeMan55
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To: EEGator
No Betamax?!?

No, but my brother does.

37 posted on 09/05/2012 2:19:07 PM PDT by Inyo-Mono (My greatest fear is that when I'm gone my wife will sell my guns for what I told her I paid for them)
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To: Future Snake Eater

I’ll keep an eye out.


38 posted on 09/05/2012 2:19:59 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: Inyo-Mono

:)


39 posted on 09/05/2012 2:20:29 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: Krankor
>>>But wearing a shirt with another guy's name on it it just seems..well..a bit demeaning.

and posting 10's of thousands of messages on a forum makes one look like a loser with no life. We all have our oddities and things that entertain us...

40 posted on 09/05/2012 2:21:28 PM PDT by NELSON111
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To: Doctor 2Brains
Why do grown men walk around in flip flops, shorts, t-shirts, keds, bizarre facial hair, piercings, tattooes, and fat guts?

Well, living in Florida, I do wear cargo shorts, polo shirt and sandals for daily wear. But, I do wear long pants for Sunday church.

Only time I wear shoes is to play golf, go dancing with my wife or attend funerals/weddings.

I can't stand facial hair, on myself, nearly trimmed on others Is OK.

Started developing a furniture problem, my chest was falling into my drawers. So, rather than trying to explain that when one has a good tool, one builds a shed over it, I returned to my military PT regimen and took care of that problem.

No piercings. No tattoos. No jerseys. No jeans.

And whenever I wear a cap, I always remove it when I enter a building or I am in the presence of a lady. I must admit, some of the ladies are quite pleasantly taken aback when I tip my cap to them while riding on bike trails.

Ergo, I do not fit the norm you mention.

Guess I am just a fossil.

41 posted on 09/05/2012 2:22:06 PM PDT by N. Theknow (Kennedys=Can't drive, can't ski, can't fly, can't skipper a boat, but they know what's best for you.)
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To: mojito

I have a jersey too! It is from my son’s high school and had the number he wore through middle school and high school. Now that he’s in college, he has a different number and colors, but I don’t think MIT sells jerseys, so I can’t update mine ... but I do have an MIT Mom t-shirt.

However, our younger son plays pop warner, and this year requested his brother’s old number, and our pop warner team has the same colors as our high school team, so I’m still okay. Just wish I could buy an MIT jersey too!


42 posted on 09/05/2012 2:22:47 PM PDT by lkco
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To: Snickering Hound

She is using more than her share of pixels...


43 posted on 09/05/2012 2:23:46 PM PDT by gov_bean_ counter (ObamaCare is an assault on the unborn, infirmed and elderly. GOP, repeat this as necessary...)
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To: lkco

What’s his major?


44 posted on 09/05/2012 2:24:25 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: EEGator

I forgot to mention that I have both the standard ratio and widescreen versions on VHS.


45 posted on 09/05/2012 2:24:29 PM PDT by Inyo-Mono (My greatest fear is that when I'm gone my wife will sell my guns for what I told her I paid for them)
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To: mojito

Outsourcing masculinity. The overweight out of shape poor unheralded loser feels like a winning worshipped wealthy athlete if he wears the jersey of HIS team. Their victory was dependent on him and he shares in it donchaknow?


46 posted on 09/05/2012 2:26:30 PM PDT by allmendream (Tea Party did not send GOP to D.C. to negotiate the terms of our surrender to socialism)
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To: Inyo-Mono

Impressive. Now for the true test. What percentage of the movie do you think you can quote?


47 posted on 09/05/2012 2:28:19 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: NELSON111
and posting 10's of thousands of messages on a forum makes one look like a loser with no life. We all have our oddities and things that entertain us

Are you trying to say you wear a Justin Bieber T shirt?
48 posted on 09/05/2012 2:29:21 PM PDT by Krankor (Green-eyed lady, lovely lady Strolling slowly towards the sun)
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To: mojito

Times have changed dramatically since I was in high school back in the early 60s.

First of all, lettering was an honor. Not everyone on the team lettered. You had to play in a certain number of quarters or innings or score a certain number of points. I did a bit of teaching after I retired and was surprised to learn that even band members now get letter jackets.

We all kept our practice jerseys but the school didn’t give us the game jerseys. I don’t recall anyone selling fake jerseys or letter jackets back then.

I can no longer get into my College letter jacket and I have no idea what happened to my high school stuff. I once took my letter jacket to a sporting goods store and asked if they could duplicate it in a larger size. They had no interest in doing so.

My grandchildren have all my old college gear. I will say those Wilson letter jackets were well made. They are still in good shape after more than 40 years.


49 posted on 09/05/2012 2:32:55 PM PDT by yarddog
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To: Krankor
>>>>Are you trying to say you wear a Justin Bieber T shirt?

Nice try.

50 posted on 09/05/2012 2:36:20 PM PDT by NELSON111
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