Posted on 10/13/2012 10:51:16 AM PDT by John Semmens
Department of Homeland Security Secretary Napolitano warned that “vibes we've been picking up indicate that a defeat for the President in November would ignite a wave of civil strife like we've never seen in this country.”
“The blogosphere and world of twitters is flush with credible threats of violence and mayhem that our Department thinks should be taken very seriously,” the Secretary said.
“Voters can help thwart this threat by ensuring the President's reelection,” Napolitano advised. “Even if voters are dissatisfied with the progress the Administration has made or are attracted to Romney's siren song, they need to ask themselves whether it is worth the risk of being assaulted in the streets or having their homes burned down before they cast a vote against the President.”
A second concern cited by the Secretary was the prospect that “many of our best and brightest would follow through with their promise to leave the country should the President lose the election. This demographic is the foundation stone of the President's plan to transform America. If we lose too many of these people the nation could spiral backwards toward a society where individuals are forced to fend for themselves.”
In related news, the Federal Aviation Administration announced plans to have as many as 30,000 aerial drones patrolling America's airspace by the end of the decade. Napolitano enthusiastically endorsed the plan. “The success the President has had using these types of weapons to neutralize our enemies abroad recommends it for domestic deployment,” she said. “Our porous borders as well as the growing threat of home-grown right-wing terrorism demonstrate the need for the ability to strike closer to home.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at...
http://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/120635-2012-10-12-semi-news-a-satire-of-recent-news-october-14-2012.htm
bring it on..
It is time for a little math lesson- 88% > 12%
I'm never going to get used to this banana republic BS.
BRING IT ON!
There are only 10 types of people in this world...those who understand binary, and those that don’t.
A lot less than that.
Half the Black male population is in prison at any given time.
Um.....what’s the downside?
I see you are also profiting from the ammo-rich environment that Bite-Me provided as a followup to Zero’s demonstration of why he is way overrated - probably have to go to a 2nd grade class to be considered the smartest man in the room and then only because someone would consider him a “man”.
Nothing will happen. they are too lazy and stupid to be self starters. No worries.
Oh no!! I better vote for Obama then (sarcasm). In the famous words of Charlie Sheen: BRING IT.
If they do, give ‘em Semmens’ address. ;>)
Doh - you got me, again!!
Seems obvious to me if this is homeland security. They may take it upon themselves to make sure this doesn't happen by any means necessary.
For example: we create a self sharia compliant laws in order to avoid conflict. Such as throwing that Youtube video guy back into jail for upsetting Islam. Or punishing people for walking their dogs in-front of Islamic protests.
When crime gets so high to a point that it is easier to avoid conflict rather then enforce law liberty becomes a dream
But it is getting harder and harder to recognize satire with these fiends running everything.
Just one more reason to get rid of the Marxist Thug occupying the White House.
So Nappy, what is your DU screen name? These clowns are not going to get up off of mommy's couch.
I know this is satire but it is likely the truth not yet reported.
It may be satire now... but on November 7th? We’ll see.
It is so hard to know if it is satire or not. That is truly sad folks.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.