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President Woos College Women with Promise of Free Birth Control
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 12 Oct 2012 | John Semmens

Posted on 10/13/2012 3:04:03 PM PDT by John Semmens

In a bid to shift the narrative to an issue he sees as more advantageous, President Obama told a George Mason University audience that “ensuring college-aged women’s access to free birth control services is what’s at stake in this election. A coed shouldn’t have to give up sex just because she can’t afford to pay for birth control. Neither should she be forced to make space in her budget for condoms or birth control pills.”

The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops vehemently opposes the Administration’s insistence that all employers, regardless of religious or ethical objections, must finance birth control and abortion. The Bishops contested the supposed rationale for the Obamacare mandate, pointing out that “access to contraception is ubiquitous and inexpensive. This mandate is about the federal government riding roughshod over freedoms guaranteed by the US Constitution.”

The President boldly dismissed these religious objections to the Obamacare mandate requiring employers to provide for birth control and abortion services in their healthcare plans. “The enemies of women’s rights attempts to evade their responsibility to provide for these rights will not prevail,” Obama bragged. “This election is about a test of wills to determine what vision for America will prevail. I assure you, that as long as I am President religious dogma will not be allowed to negate the benefits the Affordable Care Act has bestowed upon the women of this country.”

In related news, Darden Restaurants, owner of the Red Lobster and Olive Garden chains, says it is moving away from offering full-time positions. The aim is to avoid Obamacare’s requirement that firms pay for health insurance for workers who put in 30 hours or more per week. Sadly, many of those affected are women.

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2012/10/13/white-house-asserts-ignorance-of-libyan-security-problem/


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: abortion; obama; satire; women

1 posted on 10/13/2012 3:04:13 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

What are these people doing in college if they are willing to trade their futures for a $3 pack of condoms or a $10 birth control prescription?

Then again, colleges have simply become Maoist indoctrination camps that leave you $150K+ in debt and stupid as Occupy Wall Street after for years.

Ever learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth, professing themselves to be wise, they became fools.


2 posted on 10/13/2012 3:08:44 PM PDT by Westbrook (Children do not divide your love, they multiply it.)
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To: John Semmens

Special interest group:

F***ers for Obama.

Gimme a break.


3 posted on 10/13/2012 3:10:31 PM PDT by alpo (What would Selco do?)
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To: John Semmens

So, the only affordable way to be a slut is by going to college?


4 posted on 10/13/2012 3:11:18 PM PDT by NoGrayZone (For evil to triumph it is only necessary for good men to do nothing.)
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To: John Semmens
John, this one is not even satire - just straight truth. At the large university near where I live, young women have been catechized to describe big, bad Mitt Romney as "The Antichrist" because he is going to take away their (free) birth control.

I wouldn't be surprised to hear that Obama plagiarized your text before next week as debate preparation. :)

5 posted on 10/13/2012 3:12:56 PM PDT by Mr. Jeeves (CTRL-GALT-DELETE)
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To: John Semmens

Please tell me what is satire and what is truth here. It’s getting to where I can’t tell....


6 posted on 10/13/2012 4:13:06 PM PDT by C. Edmund Wright ("You Might Be a Liberal" (YMBAL) Coming out Sept 1 by C. Edmund Wright)
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To: Mr. Jeeves

I am afraid I have to agree. It doesn’t qualify as satire or parody when you accurately restate what they really do say and do.

Of course, it is really hard to parody a bunch who keep saying and doing things that are more outrageous than anything you could make up.


7 posted on 10/13/2012 4:13:46 PM PDT by Bubba_Leroy (The Obamanation Continues)
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To: John Semmens

Long legged Mac Daddy buying his wimim folk the pill and killing off the accidents. He collects a share of the bidness.

Obammy, get your nasty nose out of our uteruses!


8 posted on 10/13/2012 4:57:02 PM PDT by SaraJohnson
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To: John Semmens

> President Woos College Women with Promise of Free Birth Control

Romney should woo them with a promise of free vibes.


9 posted on 10/13/2012 5:25:54 PM PDT by Jyotishi (Seeking the truth, a fact at a time.)
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To: John Semmens

If you would sell your vote to that puke for the cost of birth control you really, really ARE a whore!!!!!


10 posted on 10/13/2012 7:54:48 PM PDT by RatRipper (Obama, YOU LIE!!! . . .again and again and again and again, ad infinitum. . . .)
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To: Westbrook

Birth control is a code word for STDs.
It’s the biggest unpublicized part of the whole “health care” story.
In the 60s when I was in college, nobody gave a rat’s @ss about health insurance.
What the kiddies are really after today is somebody to pay the cost of the medical treatment for the widespread STDs which can be expensive.


11 posted on 10/13/2012 8:05:13 PM PDT by nascarnation (Defeat Baraq 2012. Deport Baraq 2013)
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