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My Own Personal Tale Regarding Drinking and Driving this Holiday Season
Reaganite Republican ^ | 22 December 2012 | Reaganite Republican

Posted on 12/22/2012 5:25:53 AM PST by Reaganite Republican

With the Holidays upon us I would like to share a personal experience with my friends about drinking and driving-

As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a 'social session' out with friends... we all love to have a good time.

Well, a couple days ago I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit.

That's when I did something that I've never done before - I took a cab home.

Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block but since it was a cab they waved it past- I arrived home safely without incident. 

This came as a real surprise to me, since I had never driven a cab before -don't know where I got it- and now that it's in my garage I really don't know what to do with it...

[ZZ Top: Driving While Blind]

Video/more at Reaganite Republican



TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: alcohol; drinking; driving; safety
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1 posted on 12/22/2012 5:25:57 AM PST by Reaganite Republican
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To: Reaganite Republican

I am not chuckling.


2 posted on 12/22/2012 5:29:37 AM PST by HChampagne
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To: AdvisorB; ken5050; sten; paythefiddler

*** ping ***


3 posted on 12/22/2012 5:30:07 AM PST by Reaganite Republican
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To: HChampagne

Just a joke, no sane person is advocating drunk driving... I NEVER do it


4 posted on 12/22/2012 5:31:56 AM PST by Reaganite Republican
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To: Reaganite Republican

I don’t drink. Problem solved, infinitum.


5 posted on 12/22/2012 5:38:32 AM PST by Berlin_Freeper
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To: Berlin_Freeper

Hey, that takes some discipline in Berlin!

Kudos!


6 posted on 12/22/2012 5:40:09 AM PST by Reaganite Republican
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To: Reaganite Republican

Once upon a time, conservatives were not so sensitive and PC as the left. Those days are gone. For every one of us that read it, LOL’s and had the presence of mind to take it in context, another had to get ‘offended’.

So let’s all just start being libs since it seems we are headed that way adopting their behavior anyway.

No more gun at the bottom of a lake jokes, no more jokes/pix of people with ANY color and cat pix will offend PETS.

Now go get ready for the 2 min hate since we’ve always been at war with EastAsia.


7 posted on 12/22/2012 5:41:00 AM PST by Norm Lenhart
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To: HChampagne

I am. Ironic that you’re not, given your moniker. Lighten up Francis!


8 posted on 12/22/2012 5:45:24 AM PST by Common Sense 101 (Hey libs... If your theories fly in the face of reality, it's not reality that's wrong.)
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To: Reaganite Republican

I also have a huge sense of humor. I’ve been having this same problem since November 6th. People are in a very foul mood in this country and nobody wants to laugh anymore. I guess I can’t blame them. I got this in an email yesterday and thought it was funnier than ...heck.


9 posted on 12/22/2012 5:46:57 AM PST by FlingWingFlyer (U.S. elections have become nothing but another cheap ripoff of American Idol.)
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To: Norm Lenhart

“Once upon a time, conservatives were not so sensitive and PC as the left.”

___________________________________

The same thought crossed my mind...


10 posted on 12/22/2012 5:48:17 AM PST by Reaganite Republican
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To: FlingWingFlyer

Once you stop laughing, you’re cooked... tell me WHO is effective at anything when they’re miserable

Reagan was the HAPPY warrior- there’s a lesson in that for any beat-down by the deeply disappointing election result


11 posted on 12/22/2012 5:50:12 AM PST by Reaganite Republican
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To: HChampagne
I am not chuckling.

I am.

12 posted on 12/22/2012 5:50:32 AM PST by Timmy
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To: HChampagne

Lighten up, Francis.


13 posted on 12/22/2012 5:51:58 AM PST by Safetgiver ( Islam makes barbarism look genteel.)
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To: Reaganite Republican

I shudder to think that there are young people on the roads who drink, text and drive. They might even be drinking in the car at the same time. The future belongs to who?


14 posted on 12/22/2012 5:52:28 AM PST by equaviator
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To: Reaganite Republican

Wanna see the proof of it? Check out the Not Guilty threads.

Makes me sick that people can’t just take an obvious joke as an obvious joke. I need to just form a country of me and tell everyone to go to hell. If only it were possible.


15 posted on 12/22/2012 5:53:11 AM PST by Norm Lenhart
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To: Timmy

I thought it was funny.


16 posted on 12/22/2012 5:53:34 AM PST by DooDahhhh (ma)
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To: Norm Lenhart

“Once upon a time, conservatives were not so sensitive and PC as the left. Those days are gone.”

I literally beg to differ.


17 posted on 12/22/2012 5:54:02 AM PST by equaviator
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To: Norm Lenhart
I was out on the lake yesterday on my boat with my dog, cat and all my guns....

Then the boat tipped.....

My guns disappeared to the murky bottom....

The dog drowned the cat trying to stay afloat...

So the dog and I used the now dead cat as a floatation device to kick our way to shore....

Desperate to stay warm, we lured a moose close to us with a piece of cheese I found in my pocket...

Killed the moose and used it carcass to warm the dog and myself....

Fortunately, my sister (who had been showering since last Tuesday) stopped by in her car and picked us up ....

Alas for my guns and Fluffy....sniff

18 posted on 12/22/2012 5:54:50 AM PST by nevergore ("It could be that the purpose of my life is simply to serve as a warning to others.")
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To: nevergore

RACIST!!!!!!!

;)


19 posted on 12/22/2012 5:56:06 AM PST by Norm Lenhart
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To: Reaganite Republican

One of the things that Obama and the Democrats have been very successful at is making everybody in this country miserable. It’s been their dream for a long, long time. I’m not going to play along with them.


20 posted on 12/22/2012 5:56:16 AM PST by FlingWingFlyer (U.S. elections have become nothing but another cheap ripoff of American Idol.)
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To: equaviator

Begging doesn’t change the truth of it.


21 posted on 12/22/2012 5:57:29 AM PST by Norm Lenhart
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To: Reaganite Republican
Hilarious. My mom was hit by a drunk driver.

I hate to be a party pooper but DO NOT DRIVE DRUNK. And if you think you absolutely must drive drunk, please make sure to only injure or kill yourself.

22 posted on 12/22/2012 5:58:16 AM PST by Casie (Chuck Norris 2016)
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To: HChampagne

My buddy and I got drunk once and didn’t want to drive home. He got sick and we sat on the curb. Cop came by and saw me with his finger up his ass. He said “What the Hell are you doing?” I said “He’s drunk and wants to puke.” He said “If you want him to puke, you need to put your finger down his throat”. I said “ I will, I will.”


23 posted on 12/22/2012 5:58:34 AM PST by Safetgiver ( Islam makes barbarism look genteel.)
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To: equaviator

I shudder to think that there are young people on the roads who drink, text and drive. They might even be drinking in the car at the same time. The future belongs to who?...Prolly not them. It’s called thinning the herd.


24 posted on 12/22/2012 6:00:28 AM PST by Safetgiver ( Islam makes barbarism look genteel.)
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To: nevergore

Is your dog a pitbull?


25 posted on 12/22/2012 6:01:04 AM PST by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: Reaganite Republican
This came as a real surprise to me, since I had never driven a cab before -don't know where I got it- and now that it's in my garage I really don't know what to do with it...

Save it for New Year's! :)

26 posted on 12/22/2012 6:01:56 AM PST by Ezekiel (The Obama-nation began with the Inauguration of Desolation.)
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To: nevergore
Did you, by chance, see a rabbit with a pancake on it's head while you were saving yourself and the dog?
27 posted on 12/22/2012 6:05:29 AM PST by pepperdog ( I still get a thrill up my leg when spell check doesn't recognize the name/word Obama!)
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To: Norm Lenhart

Maybe more people ought to leave their PC at work which is the only place I feel pressured to follow its guidelines but that’s just me.


28 posted on 12/22/2012 6:05:58 AM PST by equaviator
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To: equaviator

But what about the Mac and Linux boxes?


29 posted on 12/22/2012 6:08:30 AM PST by Norm Lenhart
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To: Reaganite Republican

I understand the story. I’m not like that anymore, but back in the dipsy days, I often had to drive home - too inebriated to walk. But it was too dangerous, so I got an apartment with the bar on the first floor so I could get home safe and without anybody stepping on my fingers. Too old for tanglefoot now -—


30 posted on 12/22/2012 6:08:30 AM PST by imardmd1 (An armed society is a polite society -- but dangerous for the fool --)
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To: Reaganite Republican
That story is a nice example of a lengthy paraprosdokian. Here's a good short one by Groucho Marx:
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening...but this wasn't it."
Here's another nice one (unattributed):
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

31 posted on 12/22/2012 6:08:45 AM PST by RoosterRedux (He will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats)
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To: Reaganite Republican

FrogDad and I are chuckling, thanks for the funny!


32 posted on 12/22/2012 6:08:55 AM PST by FrogMom (Chicken Little is coming, and he's right!)
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To: Ezekiel

Winner! :>)


33 posted on 12/22/2012 6:09:11 AM PST by libertarian27 (Check my profile page for the FReeper Online Cookbook 2011)
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To: nevergore

I like it!


34 posted on 12/22/2012 6:11:14 AM PST by FrogMom (Chicken Little is coming, and he's right!)
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To: Reaganite Republican

I’d already seen it via email.

On a more serious note, a friend/business contact got a DUI two weeks ago. I was all I could do to not forward this one on to him; it was just too soon.

First time for him, it will still be painful.


35 posted on 12/22/2012 6:12:16 AM PST by FreedomPoster (Islam delenda est)
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To: Reaganite Republican
You did the right thing. I helped work my way through college by driving a cab in a mid sized midwestern city. It was a great job during the worst winter weather. Everything was paid straight commission, so the more runs you made, the better the money.

We appreciated the business and I especially liked the attitude of one regular who told me that he could buy a lot of cab fares for the price of one DWI ticket.

It was an interesting business. A lot of college kids (like me) or farmers took up driving cab when the weather turned rotten. Most of us left as soon as it started turning nice in March or April as there just wasn't enough support all the drivers.

36 posted on 12/22/2012 6:16:04 AM PST by Vigilanteman (Obama: Fake black man. Fake Messiah. Fake American. How many fakes can you fit in one Zer0?)
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To: Norm Lenhart
No more gun at the bottom of a lake jokes . . .

I know, and mine were a real tragedy - they got eaten before they hit the bottom:

I'm going to tell any ATF stormtroopers who come looking exactly where they can stick their heads if they want to find the guns I used to own. I sure hope any ATF staff who are loyal to the communist will search diligently.

37 posted on 12/22/2012 6:18:13 AM PST by Pollster1 (Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. - Ronald Reagan)
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To: Reaganite Republican

So that’s where my cab went. Don’t worry though, I got the car under similar circumstance.


38 posted on 12/22/2012 6:18:20 AM PST by azsportsterman
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To: Reaganite Republican
Pls disregard my post #36. I got the joke.

We had one cabbie which actually liked his liquid nutrition. A couple of customer complaints and he was gone.

39 posted on 12/22/2012 6:19:01 AM PST by Vigilanteman (Obama: Fake black man. Fake Messiah. Fake American. How many fakes can you fit in one Zer0?)
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To: Joe 6-pack; nevergore
Hmmmm...

Shortly after arriving home....

My sister went back to the shower....

My dog,a very friendly pit-bull, went in my fenced backyard were strangely, the neighbors rabbit had hopped into and onto the patio table were we always store a stack of pancakes....

That's when my friendly pit-bull (whose name is “Killer”) saw the bunny covered in pancakes....

He killed and ate the rabbit (and pancakes)and was peacefully sitting in my backyard drooling blood and foam when a Police Officer, responding to a call from my neighbor, jumped the fence and shot poor “Killer” 35 times.

Then he jumped the fence and shot the neighbor's dog for good measure... Fortunately, “Killer” is fine and is now recuperating from his wounds and still digesting the rabbit...... The Police department issued the officer a commendation for excellent police work and my sister still remains in the shower..... I went back to decorating my Holiday Tree with all natural vegan decorations and a midget...Whew...what a day!! Merry Christmas to All!

40 posted on 12/22/2012 6:20:33 AM PST by nevergore ("It could be that the purpose of my life is simply to serve as a warning to others.")
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To: Casie; Reaganite Republican

I would never drive drunk. I am usually the designated driver in our family. I do drink socially at home on occasions. Drunk driving itself is not a joke but I did think we can still laugh at obvious jokes. I thought it was funny.


41 posted on 12/22/2012 6:20:34 AM PST by BipolarBob (I survived the Lindsay Lohan Bar, Grill and Fight Club.)
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To: Reaganite Republican

. I love to drink while driving It was legal at one time to do so. I drive out of No dak into So dak and i always drive rhe speed limit and I know where the HPs hide. With my CDL i am subject to a .04 standard so I only drink one beer an hour and it takes me an hour to drink ir


42 posted on 12/22/2012 6:24:55 AM PST by South Dakota (shut up and drill)
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To: Pollster1

I’m in AZ. I was out with all mine in the desert shooting one day. As I packed up to leave I was confronted by robed and bearded awarthy men who spoke in heavily accented tones. They took my guns and told me that if I contacted the authorities to report them missing/stolen, I would be behaded and my family killed before me..

Since I understand that it’s racist to associate Muslims with any crime, I was unable to properly report the incident. Besides, who would believe me? Islam is a Religion of peace.


43 posted on 12/22/2012 6:24:55 AM PST by Norm Lenhart
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To: nevergore

every trite free republic cliche in one post!


44 posted on 12/22/2012 6:25:58 AM PST by brivette
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To: Reaganite Republican

The same thing happened to me, except I took a bus. It pretty much demolished my garage.


45 posted on 12/22/2012 6:32:28 AM PST by layman (Card Carrying Infidel)
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To: Reaganite Republican
There was a time in my life when I hit the bars every night. For several years I went on like this. Lots of friends there, it was amusing, I was very successful, money was no concern and I was single. I thought nothing of getting behind the wheel with a pretty strong buzz, but I'd always at least roll through a late-night drive through for some food, which helped.

I was a fool, a lucky fool or God was watching over me, because nothing ever happened. No accidents, no DWI. Even went through several sobriety check roadblocks with no problems. I must not look or smell drunk or something, because I was. They can be sort of scary here, with the ominous, ambulance-like black mobile courtrooms, people call them the Batmobile. Convicted right then and there.

The one night friends were convinced I was too trashed to drive home, they called a “cab” for me, an expensive proposition since I live well north of town near the lakes, over twenty miles. It wasn't a legal cab, it was an older Lincoln Towncar, the driver was a black man, nice fellow, just making a little cash on the side. Diabetic though, as I later learned. Speaking of drive throughs, he wanted to go through the Krispy Kreme drive through on the way home, he was hungry he said. I wasn't paying so fine, I said. He bought a twelve pack and ate them all in short order.

Even before we got out of the city he began weaving. Too much sugar I guess, his speech became slurred. He smacked the curb with the wheels several times. I was starting to get scared, actually. We finally got pulled over right at the city limits. He didn't do too well on the field sobriety test. Never had seen one up close like that, then out came the breathalyzer. Passed that, obviously, he wasn't drunk. The officer let him go on with a warning because he was a disabled vet, I heard the conversation.

He did get me home, to make a long story short. Wanted to sleep in his car in my driveway. i invited him in, it was cold. He said no, he did it all the time, he'd be OK. I'd need a ride back to pick up my car anyway, he'd do it for the same fare, he said. So he slept in the car.

I got up, a little groggy, sure enough there he sat. Got showered and dressed, went out, knocked on the driver side window, he woke up, let me in and we went back into town to pick up my car. Uneventful trip this time, but I was still worried, lol.

46 posted on 12/22/2012 6:41:44 AM PST by RegulatorCountry
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To: nevergore

You’re still leaving out the ‘creation v. evolution’ meme. Perhaps a word on how the pitbull and the pancake bunny came into being is in order... :-)


47 posted on 12/22/2012 6:44:13 AM PST by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: Norm Lenhart
Once upon a time, conservatives were not so sensitive and PC as the left. Those days are gone. For every one of us that read it, LOL’s and had the presence of mind to take it in context, another had to get ‘offended’.

A couple of days ago, a fellow got on my elevator as the doors were closing. He said "thanks for saving my bacon" to the fellow who held it open for him. My immediate thought was "I know that guy's not Muslim", but waited to utter that remark to a friend in confidence.

He laughed and replied, "must not be Jewish, either."

God took care of my desire to drink alcohol. I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes two months ago. I see it as a blessing, as I've taken the bull by the horns.

My eating regimen has changed drastically (it's not a diet), following 90% of the guidance from "Eat to Live" by Dr. Joel Fuhrman. Haven't had a soft drink in two months, beverages limited to water and tea.

More consistent on exercising, too, 3-4 days a week, 6-8 mile weekend walks on the Campion Trail in Irving, fitness center after work 2-3 days a week (depending on my son's Cub Scout/sports/religious ed schedule).

Results so far are promising: last two weeks blood glucose readings ranged between 86-100, weight now at 190 (from 220).

My NY's resolution is simple: stay focused and determined on following the regimen. Also, get to target weight of 175, my weight at graduation from Jump School 36 years ago.

Apologies for hijacking the thread.

48 posted on 12/22/2012 6:48:16 AM PST by Night Hides Not (The Tea Party was the earthquake, and Chick Fil A the tsunami...100's of aftershocks to come.)
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To: nevergore
Alas for my guns and Fluffy....sniff

I'll drive a cab to that. Very good story and true too {or is it two?}.

Let's not get two series.

49 posted on 12/22/2012 6:48:22 AM PST by USS Alaska (Nuke the terrorist savages, start today.)
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To: Reaganite Republican

Very funny! Thanks for the laugh this morning!


50 posted on 12/22/2012 6:53:17 AM PST by patriot08 (NATIVE TEXAN (girl type))
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