Posted on 01/07/2013 5:13:31 PM PST by eeevil conservative
May you have peace of heart knowing you favored God and now, God has favored you.
I hope everything goes well! I am so glad you get the chance to meet. God bless you.
bookmark
Pretty cool.
God bless and have many happy years together.
I’m very happy for you EC, what a great Christmas!
Thank you so much for sharing that, Eeevil. There are many women who made a different choice, and today sadly cannot tell the same story you are telling now. This is a true life version of the movie "It's a Wonderful Life". Congrats!
You are awesome. God bless you.
I’m so happy you and your daughter were granted your hearts’ desire. Hoping for continued blessings for both of you.
Congratulations!
Some of the posters here seem to feel that the ties of blood with the birth mother who gave up the child outrank the ties of love and caring with the adoptive parents who nurtured and raised that child.
I am not sure I agree. In fact, I am sure I do not.
She was blessed with parents who didn’t prevent her from finding her birth mother.
Good for them.
A great gift from the God Who Restores.
Thank you for sharing—we are very glad for you and your daughter.
You gave a gift of love and life, and now it has been given back to you.
My daughter placed her baby for adoption with a couple in another state. My grand-daughter just turned 14. Someday she will find us. In the meantime we pray for her and her family.
Wonderful to read about success stories like this. I’m still looking for my biological mother (and hopefully she’ll be able to connect me to my biological father who is not listed on the original birth certificate). Unfortunately, my birth mother has a pretty common name, so finding her is likely to be more luck than anything else.
Being an adoptive mother is a tough task, but then so is being a step-mom, a birth mom, etc. I have depended on God to get me thru the joys/heartaches of being a mother, in whatever capacity He deems. In turn, I have instructed my daughter that 2 important people in the bible were orphaned or adopted: Moses (by the Pharaoh’s daughter) and Esther (by her uncle), and that they both saved their people by God’s will. And, that we as Christians are all “adopted” back into His family thru the sacrifice of His son, Jesus. So, I’ve tried to tell her and my stepsons, it doesn’t matter if the same blood doesn’t run thru our veins, it’s how our hearts and souls are inclined that really matter!
All I know is, I have been SO blessed by my stepsons and my adopted daughter! I don’t specify step or adopted—I just tell people these are my kids. Thankfully the boys’ mom and I have had a long-term good relationship since she saw early on that I just loved them and had no intentions to “take them away.” That has served me well over these 22 years...
As for the “rights” of birth vs adoptive mom: I just go back to King Solomon’s example, and see which woman truly considered the child’s life as more precious than their own. I pray for God’s peace on my daughter’s birth mother, a peace that only He can give her to somehow assure her that her precious baby has grown into a wonderful teen and that we love her so very much. I thank God every day that the birth mother didn’t abort her cuz we’d never have had her, that she didn’t leave her to freeze and die in the Siberian cold, that she wasn’t abused, that her mother wasn’t a drug or alcoholic, that our daughter is healthy! So many blessings, it’s hard too count!
I think sometimes people have to run into an obstacle they can’t overcome before God works in their hearts. My obstacle was being infertile, and God certainly turned that around for me! As people say, we have to be totally broken and fall down flat before He can lift us up. So, perhaps the folks you referred to will have their hearts soften as He works on them. We are all a work in progress, and God is always there.
I give thanks to you for your generous gift to her parents. Gd bless. You gave her life and genes. So glad she turned out well.
Those who promote the "women's right to choose" option as an almost inconsequential act which relies on the "choice rights" of the mother never expand on the far-reaching effects and unintended consequences of that choice.
If presented at all, any discussion addresses only the present--itself a sad commentary on the provincial and historically ignorant views of those who seek to impose their ideology on current generations.
On the other hand, a genealogical search of one's family tree today might reveal a young unwed female ancestor of the mid-1800's who bore a child who grew up to be a prominent citizen, and, then, himself or herself, became the parent of as many as 10 or 12 children. Follow that family line, and one would find that young unwed mother's single "choice" to bear her child has since resulted in hundreds of community, state or national recognized leaders in their fields, or great talents whose individual contributions to the world could not be replicated except for the "choice" of that one young girl in the mid-1800's.
I do feel that adopted children are not in a holding tank until they can be reunited with supposed “real parents.” Adoptive parents ARE real parents. Parents are people who parent a child, who are there doing the love and the work, raising those kids. You do not need the same genes to be a parent. My daughter shares none of my genes but she is my daughter, no one else’s. adoptive parents ARE the real parents.
A birth parent can feel utter joy at finding the child she gave up, as Eevil conservative is feeling. She loved and carried that baby and must be thrilled to have her grow up happy and safe and good. That to me is where it should end. That a birth parent can have joy at this reunion and gratitude, but “shep no nachas” from this child (how to translate: reap no parental pride - loose translation) because this is not your child. It’s just not your place. There is a line drawn and the birth mom can love but cannot BE THE Parent and is not the “real” parent.
Pop culture connects genes with “legit” and nothing is farther than the truth.
To elucidate this point, imagine a situation which occurs with great frequency. A young woman has a relationship with a guy she doesn’t know that well. She becomes pregnant. This “new boyfriend” heads for the hills. She keeps her baby and raises him. When he is two, she falls in love and marries a wonderful man who loves them both and raises this boy as his own, day and night. He is daddy. He gets peed, pooped, and thrown up on. He teaches his son everything, spends hours at his ball games or band performances. He is there to scold, protect, put food on the table, advise, and love. WHO IS THE REAL FATHER of this boy??
Did anyone say the sperm donor? Where did you get that from? Pop culture stupid movies, or really idiotic judges.
A birth mother deserves the highest honors for giving their child up for adoption, but sharing genes is a mere parlor trick. It’s no big deal. Any kind of relationship is possible with one’s adult birth child but there are boundaries it would be inappropriate to cross. If you didn’t raise your child, it’s not your child. Love will always be accepted though! No one can have too much love! :)
bttt
The late great Steve Jobs of Apple Computer fame said pretty much the same thing about the parents who adopted him.
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