Skip to comments.Veep Suggests Platinum Solution to Gun Control (Satire)
Posted on 01/11/2013 7:17:44 PM PST by John Semmens
In what he called a stroke of genius, Vice-President Joe Biden suggested that President Obama could bypass both Congress and the Constitution by using an Executive Order to solve the gun violence crisis.
It was when I heard people talking about minting trillion dollar platinum coins to solve the debt ceiling thing that I got the idea of using platinum to get around 2nd Amendment objections to gun control, Biden boasted. If the President were to simply require that platinum be the only metal permitted in bullets we could effectively eliminate privately held guns without actually banning them.
The Vice-President argued that as Commander-in-Chief, the President has the Constitutional authority to prescribe the types of weapons and ammunition that the 2nd Amendment says a well regulated militia should have. The simplicity of my proposal is that we wouldnt be infringing on the right to bear arms. People would still have this Constitutionally protected right, but very, very few could afford the cost of ammunition.
Biden added that there would also be significant gains from eliminating the accumulation of lead in our environment from spent rounds hitting trees and dirt when hunters miss their targets. So, in a way its kind of a bipolar inspiration I had.
Senator Diane Feinstein (D-Calif) heralded Bidens idea as a breakthrough of enormous magnitude. The only thing I would add is a proviso that the platinum requirement would only apply to ammunition used by private gun owners. Government law enforcement would need to be exempt for budgetary reasons.
Feinstein suggested that existing stocks of lead bullets in private hands could be retrieved via some sort of mandatory buy back program. This would effectively criminalize all possession of leaded ammunition as well as give the government an overwhelming advantage in firepower against any opposition.
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
So it is a new class we can call "How stupid is Obama" and there it is ~ PLATINUM BULLETS!
This one definitely has all the characteristics of the listing "CLINTON BODY COUNT" ~ we haven't had one in a while but maybe we can push this to the point of Leftwingtard Distriction. Make them Democrat fascist piggies squeal!
Satire or not, do not think for an instant that the old hag does not dream of this sort of crap.
!!! I’m gonna go out TONIGHT and start ripping off tire balance weights from ALL the cars in the parking lot! Platinum shall never disarm ME!
If the President were to simply require that platinum be the only metal permitted in bullets we could effectively eliminate privately held guns without actually banning them.
I always wondered why he's called Joey "the Genius" Biden. Now I know.
I shoot the hippopotamus
With bullets made of platinum,
Because if I use the leaden ones
His hide is sure to flatten 'em.
I’m jealous. Your pinglist pings thrice. My poll freeping one only pings twice!
LOL. I wouldn’t put it past Slow Joe.
Kind of reminds one of Nazi Germany. Exactly the way Hitler did it.
Shhhhhh! Don’t give the psycholibnazis any ideas.
Biden is an absolute moronic mental case.
Thanks for the head shakin’ chuckle John. Good one, and I wouldn’t even put this past them. The Democraps and their minions of the MSM are slathering us with outrageous Propaganda sauce, and getting ready to toss us on the BBQ. To “H” with the frog in the pot scenario!
Well, if a silver bullet will kill a werewolf...think what a platinum bullet could do!
You might be able to just wave a gun at someone and accomplish the same goal. No cost at all. This suggestion could well backfire..so to speak. :)
There’s never a copper round when ya need one...
Would we still be allowed silver bullets for werewolves?
Ruined it with the satire banner. Still funny.
Look for the ones with loose battery cables. The alarm won’t be working.
About a year ago the EPA banned lead wheel weights.
Lead acid batteries make nice collectibles.
Dang John. Don’t give the commies any ideas.
There’s the link for the koinkydink ~ Feinstein’s menopause challenges the onset of Hoplophobia ~
People must certainly siddle away to the far end of the car when you come up with applicable poetry~!
This is the guy Obamugabe imagines ought to investigate the Newtown shooting ~ to come up with solutions ~ or was that solitons.
Joe will never know, but Fur Shur the dude is going to steer everybody away from folks who've had brain surgery!
Stop giving them ideas.
Your satire’s proximity to reality should make us all weep. Better, I suppose, to laugh.